chapter sixty-five
fake
[shawn peter raul mendes]
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august 8th; shawns birthday
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all i want for my birthday is one girl, one woman actually. i won't get her anytime soon though, i just have to realise that. anya rose steinburg, i am so helplessly still obsessed with her, and missing her, but of course, she just wants to be friends.

i don't want to be friends. i want to be engaged again, i want to marry her, i want her to be my wife, i want her to be the mother of my children, i want to grow old with her.

anya saying to me she wants to be friends kills me, only because i don't want to be friends. i want to be so much more.

"happy birthday to you," my band come into my section of the bus, singing and holding a cake, charlie puth behind them, with aaliyah, geoff and andrew. "happy birthday to you," a smile appears on my tired face, and i sit up in my capsule bed, rubbing my eyes. "happy birthday dear shawn, happy birthday to you." they all finish, pushing the cake in my face to blow out the candles.

"birthday beats!" aaliyah here's, hopping up next to me and punching me nineteen times. god, i'm nineteen, and i've almost been a father and been engaged.

"thanks i guess." i laugh, pulling aaliyah into a hug and kissing her forehead. "love you."

"love you more." she mumbles, hugging me back. "mum and dad are outside, we're all going out for breakfast."

"mendes!" charlie shouts, handing me a bag of things.

"puth!" i repeat, taking the bag and opening it, revealing gifts and letters.

"fans gave these to me at the show a couple days ago, happy birthday man." he tells me.

"thanks charlie." i smile, putting it on my bed, and hopping down to get ready.

"hey shawn, call anya at some stage today and ask if she can help with set management when she's coming for the show." andrew tells me, once i've showered and changed.

"why me?" i ask. "can't you?"

"shawn." andrew warns. "come on, you want to talk to her, i know you do."

"fine, fine." i put my hands up in surrender, sliding my phone into my shorts pocket, and walking out of the bus, joining my parents and aaliyah.

"happy birthday sweetie." my mum hugs me, planting a kiss on my cheek, and i smile, wrapping my arms around her.

"thanks mum." i beam, letting go of her, as my dad pulls me into a hug.

"nineteen eh?" he chuckles. "happy birthday son."

"thanks dad." he pats my back, letting go of me, whilst i put my sunglasses on, joining aaliyah in the shade. "aaliyah do you want to do me a favour?"

"if it involves cleaning, no." she answers, making me chuckle a little.

"can you call anya for me? and can you ask her if she can do set management on the show she's coming to? andrews desperate." i ask slowly.

"sure, give me your phone." i shrug, handing aaliyah my phone, as she unlocks it, scrolling down my contacts, and pressing my phone to her ear. "hey anya! yeah i'm good, you? listen shawn wanted a word with you so i'm gonna pass the phone to him, okay? see you in boston!"

"what? aaliyah!" i suddenly snap, as she shrugs, a smirk on her face, and holding my phone out.

"go on, it's for your show." she says, as i groan, picking up my phone, pressing it to my ear.

"hey." i say softly, putting the phone to my ear.

"hey, happy birthday." she replies, as i smile.

"thank you, listen, andrew was wondering if you wanted to work on set management and stage management when you come to the show, you don't have to but like andrew wants you to so." i say.

"um, sure, i'll see you then i guess." she stutters, making me sigh.

"i'm sorry, anya, really i am." i mumble. "just ignore me, i talk shit anyway."

"it's fine, honestly and i understand why." she says softly. "shawn you need to stop calling me, or talking to me, or contacting me after my birthday." she takes a breath. "and i'll do the same to you."

"is that really what we have to do?" i croak out, surprised at what she is saying. "anya i-i can't."

"shawn it's for the best, please find love, find someone else." she says to me. "please."

"why?" i ask, confused. "i'll see you at the show."

"yeah, i'll see you then." she says shakily. "bye shawn."

"bye anya." she hangs up, as i sigh, putting my phone back into my pocket, leaning against the side of the bus, looking down at my feet.

i miss her.
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bare with me guys, i know you want shawn and anya back. soon, i promise, i miss them too lmao

also i'm really sorry for the short update, i'm a little busy at the moment