Fake Love
sᴏᴍᴇᴛɪᴍᴇs ᴄʀᴏssɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴇ
ʟɪɴᴇ ɪs ᴀ ʙᴀᴅ ɪᴅᴇᴀ.
▸ ᵁᴷᴺᴷᴼᵂᴺ
Best friend. That was what we are before. Best friend. I was always there for him. Always cheering him up when he's sad. Always supporting his decision even though I don't like it.
Best friend. I was a best friend to him. We are just two people, existing in this vicious world. Just two broken and simple people.
No problems. No contradiction. No nothing. Everything has changed when he suddenly told me his feelings. Everything has changed since that day.
I sighed deeply as I look outside from the coffee shop that Merriane Szevira own. I sipped my black coffee as the snow started to fall again outside. It's so cold everywhere.
I made myself comfortable while waiting for him. It's been five years. Five years of faking it. Five years of fooling ourselves. I can't help myself. I started reminiscing all the things that happened in that five years.
That was Saturday evening, while I am just in the library, trying my best to solve the math problem Sir Zeico gave us. While my classmates started to leave, I remained there, pissed off because I really don't know how to solve the math problem. Like what the heck?
It's not really a simple day for me because Nick doesn't show up that day, again. He didn't even text me. He's my best friend for Pete's sake!
In my irritation, I closed my notebook and angrily put it inside my bag as I started to leave the library. Still thinking about the math problem while Dominic's sudden disappearance bothers me.
I walked at the dark hallway. I texted our driver to fetch me because my great best friend doesn't show up. I rolled my eyes at that thought.
I dialed his number on my phone. I tried calling him earlier but, he's rejecting it and he didn't even answer my texts! Damn! Answer it, you dimwit!
He doesn't answer my call! I cussed loudly. Fucking hell! Fine! If he don't want to talk to me! Then don't! The hell I care!
I became more irritated when I received a text from my driver that he has a two flat tires. Fuck! I started cursing everyone, because I'm so so so mad! Like shit!
It's already dark and I know momma would scold me again for going home late! Shit!
“Azea.” My brows raised when I heard Dominic's voice on my right side.
He's standing there. While I am at the school lounge waiting for my driver to come the fuck here.
My best friend is a pure Korean, he have a chinky eyes, pointed nose, pinkish small lips and jet black hair. He is fair as white. He's even whiter than me. I remembered drawing him into my scrapbook before I hid it in my closet together with my diaries.
My mother always told me that it's goof to write a diary so that you can have a thing to let you back in the past.
I scoffed. I didn't even hid the irritation in my face. I heard him sighed. Still not walking towards me. He just remained there. Standing like a fucking statue.
“What the fuck are you doing here, Dominic Kairo Beltran?” I irritably asked. Not minding his intense stare at me that's giving me some unnamed feelings inside that makes me more irritated.
Whatever this feeling is, I won't and will never entertain this.
“Azea... can we—can we talk?” he calmly asked.
I can feel my heart leaped when I saw how he stared at me. Those stares that makes me feel that I am special. I shook my head on that ridiculous idea. He's my best friend for fuck's sake!
“About what?” I asked.
I heard him sighed nervously. I can see in my peripheral vision that he's scratching his neck while repeatedly biting his lower lip.
He's nervous. That's his mannerisms when he's nervous about something or someone. Shiiz! My best friend's hot when he's doing that.
“What's the natter, Dominic Kairo?” I said his whole name because I am still pissed because he didn't talk to me for one week.
Not even his friend Eros knew his whereabouts. If I know he just bang his current fling or girlfriend somewhere. Whatever.
“Azea.. I...” he stutter.
I put down my bag on the chair and walked towards him. He's still biting his lip. My forehead ceased when I saw how his cheeks turned red when I stared at his luscious lips. I know his my best friend and all, but what does happened to him to blush in front of me?
I stop in front of him. Looking at his reaction, “Spill.”
“I.. I like you, Azea.” My mouth parted when I heard him say that.
My heart pounded wildly inside my ribcage and I can feel the shit thing I felt earlier. This fucking unnamed emotion.
“What the fuck did you say? Stop joking that way–” I stopped talking when he suddenly crashed his lips into mine and he encircled his arms around my waist.
Pulling me more against his body. I closed my eyes and answer his gentle kisses.
And after that night, my life changed. He started giving me tulips, sometimes red rose. He's more caring than before and we started dating.
We were just third year high school that time. And before that year ends, at December twenty-three, I finally said yes.
We we're fourth year high school when our relationship turned to endless fighting. I am very jealous to this certain girl, her name is Eva, that's still junior high school that always grinds her body to Nick.
But, that day I was very pissed off because my cousin stole my trophies when I won the literature writing contest. He showed it to his friends and told them that it's his.
And I got more mad when I saw Nick in the gymnasium with that bitch as she grinds her body into Nick while my great fucking boyfriend looks joyful
I stared at them with daggers and a thought that I shove away came back with a more powerful voice, making me numb as it continuously spoke that same fucking line over and over again!
He desired that bitch.
I couldn't control the madness I felt and I quickly ran towards their direction and strangled her hair before I gathered all my energy to punched that mothafucka hard as I could.
I was so pissed off when Nick pushed me hard and my back hit the metal benches. I winced in pain and looked at Eros who instantly asked me if I'm okay. I didn't answer that's why he carried me.
And then I lost my consciousness.
I woke up after a week in the hospital, the doctor said that It wasn't serious but I need to be careful on my actions because it's my spinal cord we're talking here.
After two weeks, Nick and I met in the garden of our school. Everyone's putting hate on me for hurting a freshman but I don't mind them at all.
I was taken aback when Nick started speaking angrily. What the fuck?
“You know what I don't like about your attitude, Amethyst Zeanna? You're so clingy, so jealous and you cussed too much. Even mama didn't like that attitude of yours, cause it's so unlady like! And you know what's the worst?” he angrily shouted at me while throwing daggers at my direction.
I remained there frozen for awhile before I composed myself and now I can feel the burning anger through my body. How dare you, Nick? Fuck!
“What's happening to you, Dominic?" I shouted with gritted teeth.
“Happening to me?” He smirked.
“Yes, fucking answer me, you fool!”
“I should be the one asking you that, Amethyst. What's happening to you?”
I remained there dumbfounded.
“Because now you are too hot-headed and you didn't even let your pride down even once when we got into this relationship. I was always the one who's understanding you and apologizing even though I never did something wronh,” he said as he looked away.
Anger started fading when pain started appearing inside my chest. It attacked my heart so much that I don't know what am I feeling inside.
“You are too tiring to love, Amethyst. I'm so tired,” he said that in soft voice but every word exploded my ears as if he screamed at me.
I remained calm at that moment even though my heart sank, I still manage not to cry in front of him. I will not cry in front of him, because I will not surrender my pride, no matter what the fuck happens.
“Do you think it was only you who is tired in this fucking relationship, huh? If you're tired, what about me, Dominic? What about me?” I screamed while shaking my head.
Even though my insides are hurting too much. Even though my heart bleeds so much because of pain. Even though I want to cry in front of him, I didn't let him see how hurt I am.
“What about you, Amethyst? All you fucking know is to suspect me at all! Does my promises isn't enough for you to stay by my side, huh?” He glanced at my way.
“I wouldn't suspect if you doesn't do something that will make me!”
“That.” He pointed at me.
“What?”
“That's what I hate the most of your attitude." He started to walked away.
“Let's break up, Dominic. Leave my life, forever,” I shouted before I turned my back and started walking away from him.
As I do that my tears started to fall. I feel so weak that I can never get him back. Because of that slut we always fight and now... our relationship ended.o
I know my reasons are immature for being jealous but he pushed me away instead of standing at my side. Eros was the only one who helped me.
His reason's were shallow as well for doing that to me, because of what? He's attracted at that slut? I'm his girlfriend that time! He's a fool.
For two months I found out that he's dating that fucking slut. I always saw him with that slut and I started to question myself.
Did he really loved me?
I didn't spent my time with our common friends because I was afraid to see that my assumptions are real. That he just thought that he loves me but he didn't and when that slut came, he became to question his feelings for me.
And with that event I got so lazy. I stopped joining the volleyball competition that year and Coach Enrique got so sad. But, I don't care.
My grades are still good but, I stopped doing the physical activities that I usually do and because of that, I gained more weight.
Freshmen year of my college year started. I heard that he will taking up Business Ad at one of the prestigious school, while I'll be sticking to my dream school.
Nothing really happened that time. I only got to see him at some of the parties. We didn't even talk and I had three boyfriends that year.
Sophomore and Junior college when I met this guy and we've been together for two years. But, we broke up because I saw him cheating. It didn't even matter to me though. I was hurt, yes. But, I knew that it is only my ego. That time I realized how much I still love Nick.
How pathetic right? I was the one who asked for freedom but I was still caged in this jailed called fucking love.
I contacted Eros and asked him about Nick. He said that Eva the slut and Nick broke up last year. I thanked him and continued my studies even though I was still intrigued by the sudden realization I felt.
Senior college, when I got in a car accident and been in coma for two months and that's when I found out that he's the one taking care of me.
I don't know what happened before that, but my parents said they asked him to do that. I was still mad at him but this fucking sicked love I have were stronger.
No pursuing happened between us. We just got back to each other. No label. Just two dating people.
After three years of being in a assuming relationship. My feelings for him started fading and I know his feelings also. Or so I thought.
We have a little misunderstanding at once and then history repeats itself but now it's little bit heavy.. Fight. Breakup. Get back. Fight. Breakup. Get back.
For three years, that's our cycle. On that moment I feel so unhappy but, because I still believed that I still love him. I stayed.
And then he suddenly asked me to marry him. I believed that still I love him and I know that both of us changes in so many levels.
For once I still want to give it a chance. Still want to stay into his side and so, I agreed.
We got married. We settled for our own and we're still adjusting to the sudden changes of our lifestyle. After two years, I am pregnant. We were so happy that time.
But, the more I spent my time with him. I suddenly feel that he's too cold to me. He's too distant. Fuck! What is it this time?
I didn't mind it at all. I am not hurting because of those shallow things ever again. I know my feelings really changed for him. I just don't know how can I still say I love you when those words are just empty things.
I am four months pregnant when I saw him. He thought that I am staying to momma's home but I just want to surprise him.
I want to still try this. Maybe if I make more effort, my feelings would go back. But, it doesn't work that way.
I heard the door open. I smiled widely, but it's instantly faded. Instead of surprising him, I was the one he surprised.
I saw in my two blue eyes that Eva the slut was with Nick and his arms is in her waist. He was shocked when he saw me.
“Y-you,” I stuttered while I am pointing at that slut. I still couldn't processed what I just saw.
She pushed Nick's away, “You said your wife wasn't here?” she angrily asked as she slapped Nick's cheek that's still in shocked. After that, she got the hell out of our house.
“You're fucking cheating on me, again. Nick! Again!” I said dumbfoundedly.
II started crying. Not minding if my pride crumbles down.
“Azea, I'm not,” he denied.
“Fuck you, Nick! Fuck you!” I screamed before I ran towards our room. But, before I could lock the door, he already open it.
“Azea, it's not what you think!” he said hurriedly. I just look at him deadly.
“Leave,” I said.
“Azea..”
But, before I could utter more hateful words to him I suddenly feel pain in my womb. I looked down and I saw blood.
I have miscarriage. After that night, we never talk. Minding our own businesses. He arrived home late and I leave early.
After one year, momma visited me. Telling me the truth about my marriage with him.
“He was forced to marry you,
because his father wants to merge their business to ours. Since you two are in a relationship, we made our condition that he will marry you first before they got a contract of merging of our shipping line,” she said as she put down the pink small mug on the table.
I remained silent, but I know where this story will end. He just used me because of business.
“How many years should he stay married to me?” I asked.
“Five years.”
That night I confronted him and he doesn't denied it all. Force. He was forced to do this shit.
I walked away from our house with a broken heart because I am trying my best to make this shit work. Then I found out I was just used?
For two years I stayed with him. Even if it still hurts for me to see him. I still stayed. For business, I stay into that unhappy relationship with him.
“Azea.” Nick whispered as he kissed my forehead as he sat in front of me.
I smiled and for that two years, I started accepting that maybe, we're really not meant to be. I forgiven him, he's still my best friend but we crossed the line and because of that we both hurt each other.
“How are you?” I asked. We started our relationship again as friends. And maybe, after sometime we become best friends again.
“Doing great and, Azea, Judge Julio Crenas are coming. It's been five years, Mrs. Beltran,” he jokingly said. I laughed.
“Soon to be ex Mrs. Beltran.”
He shook his head as he gets my ensaymada and eats it. “Hey, that's mine!” I said.
“Not anymore, babygirl,” he said.
Stunned I just looked at him with eyes wide open. That's.. that's his endearment to me since I was a kid. He glanced at me and he grinned when he saw me sitting like a statue.
“I want to go back into the times when we're still doesn't hurt by that fake love we feel for each other.” He said. I smile.
Fake love. Yes, we fake our love for each other.
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FINISHED. | darkFortalejo_16
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