Once upon a time in a kingdom not too far away there lived a well-meaning yet greedy and somewhat rude king called Stan. He had never married and had no children but he did have a nephew who he loved like his own son. One day there was a knock at the door of his castle, he answered it to see an old and ugly woman.

"Any food or money for a poor soul?" She asked.

"Uh....No! Sorry I'm very poor. Yeah! Poor as dirt!" He lied.

"Poor as dirt? You're the king! You're richest man in this kingdom!"

"No I'm not the king."

"Your highness where do you want this solid gold chair?" His servant Soos said causing Stan to face palm himself.

"Liar!" The old woman shrieked. "For your greed and dishonesty I hereby place a curse on your first born son!"

"I don't have kids."

"Oh...Well do you have nephews and nieces?"

"Yeah."

"Then I hereby place a curse on your first born grand nephew!"

She snapped her fingers and then bang! Crash! Lighting flashed and Stan's nephew was transformed into an ugly creature who could only be changed back by a princess.

Meanwhile in another kingdom there lived a wicked king called Preston who was married to a just as wicked queen called Priscilla, had a daughter called Pacifica who was unequal in beauty but the princess despite being very beautiful was alas very vain for her parents had spoiled her greatly and raised her to be shallow and selfish. The princes who came to court her were always rejected because she believed herself to be too superior for them.

"Father these princes are too stupid and ugly to marry me! Send them away!" She demanded.

"Excellent work my daughter." Her mother said. "You must never settle."

"Worry not we shall find a suitable prince for you." Her father said.

"I don't want to marry some mere prince! I want a king!"

"But all the kings at the time are either already married or much too old for you." Her maid Candy said. "Wouldn't you prefer a young unmarried prince?"

"Don't argue with the princess!" King Preston shouted. "You forget your place servant! Leave!"

Later that day Pacifica went to a nearby well to play with her most favorite possession, a golden ball that was given to her by her kind and gentle maternal grandmother before she died. Pacifica loved her golden ball more than anything in the world, she would sit by the well tossing it up and down for hours. Little did she know that she wasn't alone that day.

"Pardon me." A voice said. "Could you please not make so much noise you're scaring away the flies."

"Who said that?" She gasped.

"I did."

"Where are you?"

"Over here."

"I don't see you."

"I'm on top of the well."

She looked to see a green frog perched on the edge of the well.

"Eeek! A horrid toad!" She screamed.

"Oh a nasty princess!" The frog replied. "And I am not a toad, I am a frog."

"Same difference. You're both horrid reptiles."

"Wrong again, actually I am an amphibian. Don't you read books?"

"How dare you talk to me that way! Don't you know I'm a princess?"

"I can tell."

"Really how?"

"You're very rude."

"Ugh! You forget your place you disgusting creature!"

"I know my place. I am a humble frog who merely wanted to sit here and find a meal while you are a very rude and mean princess who just flat out decided to insult me."

Pacfica was quite angered by the frog's words. No one had ever spoken to her like that before.

"Go away!" She demanded.

"With all due respect I was here first."

"I am the princess and I am ordering you to leave."

"And I am a frog and I am telling you that I was here first and I refuse to leave until I can find a decent meal."

"But this is my well and frogs are not welcome here."

"And pray tell why not?"

"Because frogs are the ugliest creatures in the world and the least important."

"I beg to differ, there have been many, many, famous frogs in history."

"Name twelve."

"I'll give you thousands, the frogs of Egypt."

"They were a plague."

"That depends on who's side your own. The Egyptians or Moses."

"Listen if you don't leave right now I'm going to-." But in her anger she accidentally dropped her ball down the well. "Oh no! No! Look what you made me do!"

"What I did? Excuse me?"

Oh it's too deep! My grandmother gave it to me! It's all I have left of her and now I'll never get it back!" She started to cry. Seeing her so sad the frog pitied her.

"Oh no. Don't cry please, I can't stand to see a princess cry." He said. "I'll tell you what I'll get your ball back."

"You will?"

"Oh yes we frogs are excellent swimmers."

"Really froggy? Oh froggy if you get me back my ball I'll give you anything in the world you want."

"Really? Anything?"

"Yes. All my dress, my ring, my crown, anything."

"Don't be silly I'm a frog I have no use for fabric, a ring is much too heavy for me to where, and what on earth would I do with a crown?"

"Well what do you want? Please! I must have my ball back."

"Alright listen, I like you. A little argumentative and short-tempered but I love that in a woman. Now I don't ask for much just a few simple requests."

"Like what?"

"Well...If I get your ball back will you be my friend?"

"Your friend?"

"Yes and could I have dinner with you at the castle?"

"Have dinner with you?"

"Uh-huh and I would like to sleep with you."

"Sleep with you?!" She screamed. "How dare you make such a disgusting request! Of all the nerve! Have you no respect for women?!"

"Oh no!" The frog said blushing. "No, nonononono! Not that! That's not at all what I had in mind! Believe me I would never do such a disrespectful thing to a lady let alone a princess! What I mean is I want to sleep near you...On your pillow I mean. Do you have a silken pillow?"

"Of course I do."

"Oh I've always dreamed of sleeping on a silken pillow. So those are my terms."

"That's what you want? To be friends, have dinner at the castle, and sleep on my pillow?"

"Yes."

"No way. A girl has self respect you know."

"Suit yourself. I have more important things to do."

"Now just a minute." Pacifica thought to herself. "Suppose I agree to his ridiculous terms and just leave him? Ha-ha! What's he going to do? Storm the castle with an army of toads? And besides Mother and Father make promises they never keep all the time."

"Froggy." She said. "You have a deal I promise that if you get me back my ball I'll do all those things for you."

"Oh thank you! Thank you sweet princess!"

Without another word he dove into the well and went to retrieve the ball. Down and down he swam into the water until he reached the bottom of the well where the ball was. Once he had the ball he swam back up and handed it to Pacifica. She snatched the ball from him and ran off.

"Wait! Princess! Come back!" He called. "I don't believe it! She had to have heard me!"

Indeed Pacifica did hear him but she did not care for she had been lying the whole time. However the frog was a lot smarter and more determined than she thought. With all his strength in his frog legs he hopped toward the castle. When Pacifica returned home she learned that her parents had left on royal business leaving the kingdom in charge of her maternal grandfather. Now while her parents and paternal relatives were all selfish and cruel liars her maternal family were all good and honorable and they did not tolerate dishonesty. When she and her grandfather sat down to eat at dinner there was a knock at the door.

"Who is it?" Her grandfather asked.

"It is a frog my lord." A servant said. "He says that the princess invited him to dinner."

"Granddaughter is this true?" He asked her.

"No." She lied.

"Granddaughter." He said suspiciously.

"Alright I promised a frog that if he could retrieve the ball grandmother gave me I would let him have dinner with us and sleep on my silken pillow."

"And did he retrieve your ball?"

"Yes."

"Then you must keep your word."

"But grandfather he is a frog."

"And you are a princess who made a promise and royals who make promises must keep them."

"But Mother and Father make plenty of promises that they don't keep."

"I don't care I do not tolerate trickery and deceit especially from my family. I tried to raise your mother to be a good and honest woman but she didn't turn out that way however I will try to make you good as well. I am in charge while your parents are away and I order you to keep your word."

"But-"

"Enough! Let the frog in."

The door was opened and the frog hopped into the dinning room.

"Greetings my lord and lady." He said. "I thank you for your kind invitation."

"We are welcome to have you." Her grandfather. "And we would like to thank you for returning my granddaughter's ball. It must've been very difficult."

"Not really but I am very hungry. So would you be so kind as to give me something to eat?"

"Of course."

An excellent banquet was cooked and served for the frog who ate better than he ever had in a long time. After he ate he began to amuse the dinner guests with jokes and tricks such as dancing and juggling. Everyone was quite impressed by how talented the frog was even Pacifica was impressed but she wouldn't admit it.

"So on my way here I met a female frog and she said spawn? We haven't even had dinner yet." Everyone laughed at his joke. "And now I shall preform a trick with this olive."

He stuck his tongue out at the olive, swallowed it, then burped up a flame that transformed into a flower.

"For you Princess."

She glared at him and reluctantly took the flower.

"Well I think I'm going to bed now."

"Hmm...Yes. It is getting late." Her grandfather said. "Pacifica take the frog with you."

"What?! Why?"

"Because you promised him that he could sleep on your silken pillow now keep your word."

"Ugh!"

The frog followed Pacifica up to her bed chamber were the servants treated him to a nice bath before bed.

"Ahh. That was wonderful." He said drying himself off.

"I can't believe this." She said. "I'm now the laughing stock of the entire kingdom, I hope you're happy."

"Will you relax? I'll be out of your hair by tomorrow morning."

"But I have to sleep next to a frog tonight, a slimy frog, I'm afraid of slimy things like frogs and toads and lizards and snakes."

"Technically lizards and snakes aren't slimy, their skin is actually quite dry."

"Whatever! I don't like them! And don't like you! So please go away!"

"My aren't you the ungrateful one! You know you're lucky I made my request so simple, I could've asked for your hand in marriage."

"Ha! Me marry you? I'd rather die!"

"Hey I know I'm no Adonis but it's not like I'm a dragon and besides you're not even my type. I mean really who on earth would want to marry you? Yeah you're the most beautiful princess in the world but take that away and what have you got? A spoiled brat."

"Ugh! Why you wretched little beast! I'll teach you- Wait...Do you really think I'm the most beautiful princess in the whole world?"

"Well..." The frog said blushing. "Doesn't everyone?"

"Yes of course they do!"

"Tell you what I'll leave right now."

"Really?"

"Yes but only if you give me a kiss."

"No way! That's the last thing I'll give you."

"Then pass me the pillow."

She sighed and placed the frong on her silken pillow then she climbed into bed and they went to sleep. Around midnight Pacifica awoke to find a snake in her bed, she froze in horror. She recognized the snake from one of her books in the library, it was highly poisonous. One bite and she could instantly die. It slithered up her body and up to her neck ready to bite her.

"Hey ugly!" The frog called. "Fresh frog legs right over here!"

The snake turned his attention away from the frightened princess and slithered after the frog. iIn a flash he opened out of the way and led the snake on a wild chase across the princess's bed chamber floor. During the chase a mirror was knocked over and it shattered, the frog grabbed a shard of it and in one swift move he cut off the snake's head killing it instantly.

"Oh froggy." Pacifica said gratefully. "You wonderful dear little thing. You saved my life even after I was so mean to you. You are as brave and kind as any knight in the kingdom."

"Gee...Thanks." He said blushing again.

"Can you ever forgive me for being so cruel?"

"Anything for you princess."

"Tell me why did you want to be my friend, eat dinner with me, and sleep with me."

"Well...I...I...I can't lie to royalty but you'll think me foolish if you hear the truth."

"Try me. Can't be more foolish than a talking frog."

"Alright the thing is, I've, always been in love with you."

"Come again?"

"I've been in love with you ever since I first saw you playing with your golden ball on the balcony of your castle when I first hopped into this kingdom and I've watched you for many days after. Pretty foolish huh?"

"Foolish yes but sweet." She picked up the frog and placed a kiss on his head. In a flash he dropped from her hands and wrapped himself up in a blanket than poof! "Froggy are you alright?"

He stuck his head out of the blanket but to her surprise it was not the head of an ugly frog but the head of a handsome young man.

"Thanks I needed that." He said.

"Oh my God you're a man!" She gasped.

"Oh I'm not just any man I'm a prince. Prince Dipper at your service." He said. "Well goodbye."

"No wait! Don't move!"

"Why?"

"Well...um...You're naked."

Oh, Oh! Oh so I am!" He said quickly covering himself. "I beg your pardon for my boldness, it's just um well in the form I was before I couldn't wear clothes."

"I'm confused are you a frog or a prince?"

"I suppose both, you see my uncle a good but greedy man lied to a witch so she punished him by turning me into a frog."

But why not turn him into a frog? He made the mistake."

"I know right? Anyway I could only be returned to my true form if a fair princess kissed me."

"Oh well glad to have helped. So I guess you should leave."

"Yeah but um you know maybe you should kiss me again just to make sure I don't change back."

"Oh well we wouldn't want that."

She cupped his face and kissed him, they kissed back.

"What's going on up here?!" A voice shouted.

"Father!" Pacifica cried. "Why are they here? Hide! If they find you here they'll kill you!"

"Can't we just tell them the truth?"

"Who would believe it?"

"Good point."

She pulled the covers over him and then went to answer the door. Her parents barged into her room.

"Father what are you doing here?"

"Your mother and I received word that you let a frog eat at our table and stay in our castle while we were gone. Is this true?"

"Well yes Father but he's gone now."

"You let a filthy, slimy, frog stay in our beautiful castle! Have you no shame?"

"The frog did me a service and I promised him that I would give him anything. Grandfather said that I-"

"He's a frog! How dare you shame us by letting a disgusting creature in here! I'm going to give you a good thrashing you stupid girl!"

He sized Pacifica by her arm and prepared to thrash his own daughter when-

"NO!" Dipper shouted in objection.

"Who said that?" Preston asked.

"I did." Dipper said his upper body coming out from under the bed sheets.

"What the? Who are you?" Preston asked.

"Oh! I'm Prince Dipper."

"Liar! There is no Prince Dipper! And do you know what the penalty is for being caught in a princess's bed?"

"Oh no! No! Now I know how this looks! But-But you see I-I-I-I didn't do anything!"

"Guards! Throw him into the deepest darkest dudgeon!"

"Father no!" Pacifica begged.

"No you can't!" Dipper protested. "I'm naked."

The king gasped and looked at his daughter horrified.

"Remove him!"

So Prince Dipper was thrown into the deepest, darkest dudgeon far from the light of day while Princess Pacifica was sent away to a very strict boarding school. Luckily however Pacifica's grandfather who had been told by his granddaughter what happened to the frog prince went to inform King Stan and together they went to visit the witch and begged her to help him.

"Alright I'll help but only if he apologizes and does a variety of humiliating things." The witch said.

"What? Never! I am a king, I have my dignity!" Stan said.

"Then guess what cool guy, your nephew will sleep with the dudgeon rats for the rest of his life!"

"Fine!"

So after ordering Stan to dance in his underwear in front of his subjects, the witch used her magic to free both Dipper and Pacifica then she punished King Preston and Queen Priscilla for their selfish and wicked ways by turning them into frogs as well. Once Dipper and Pacifica were reunited they confessed their love for each other, married, and lived happily ever after as the new kind and honest king and queen.

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