Chapter Eighteen

   Days later, Rarity was let out of the hospital. Granted, she was still critically underweight, but now it was something she sought to fix with the help of her friends. 

   Now Rarity was back at therapy with Tender Soul who was gravely concerned for her well-being. "I'm glad that you're alright, Rarity. We've had many clients like that here and well... not all of them are as fortunate as you."

   Rarity smiled. "Thank you, Tender Soul. I'm glad that you're concerned. Knowing that I have a therapist who's concerned and caring truly helps me to feel better about your advice." 

   "I'm glad," Tender Soul told her. "What on earth got you to this point?"

   "Well..." Rarity said, trying to recall the details. "I've been struggling to bring myself to eat recently. But never again! I promised my friends that I would recover and that's a promise that I intend to keep." 

    "I think you've finally found that strength that was inside of you all along," Tender Soul said, a smile flickering across her face. "Are you ready to finally accomplish that second 'E'?"

    "Yes," Rarity said. "Um..." She tapped her finger to her chin. "What was the second 'E' again?" 

    Tender Soul giggled. "Exchange unhelpful coping skills for helpful skills." 

    "Ah," Rarity said. "I think I can do that!"

    "Let's start here," Tender Soul said. She pulled out a notebook and pen. She clicked the pen twice before holding it over the paper to write. "What are some of the unhelpful coping skills that you have used while dealing with your anorexia?"

    Rarity thought for a moment before she answered, "I reminded myself that not eating would make the numbers on the scale go down."

    Tender Soul jotted her answer down on the notepad. "I see. What else?" 

   "I exercised," Rarity admitted. "I exercised a lot. I exercised to the point of throwing up." 

    "Exercise in general isn't an unhealthy coping skill, but overexercising sure is," Tender Soul affirmed, writing down her answer. "Is there anything else?"

   "Throwing food in the trash always brought me relief," Rarity said. "I also had a set of rules that I followed in my mind. Like, this food is unacceptable or this amount of calories is too much or you can't eat today at all."

    Tender Soul nodded, a solemn expression adorning her face. "Rarity, I'll tell you what. We're going to exchange each of these unhealthy coping skills with their healthy opposites. We'll start with reminding yourself that not eating will help you to lose weight. What is a healthier alternative?"

    Rarity smiled. "Reminding myself that not eating will cause me to be unhealthy and get sick." She paused. "Also, I could die."

   "You're absolutely right," Tender Soul told her. "Great! I'll write that down for you." She quickly jotted it down in her notebook. "Alright, let's move to the next one. Overexertion. What's a healthier alternative?"

   "Um... stopping the workout routine?" Rarity suggested.

   "You could do that," Tender Soul said. "But exercise is still good for you. It's knowing how to do it in moderation. Maybe you could find a form of exercise that you enjoy. Going dancing with friends? Going on a jog? Going on a nature walk? Whatever sounds best to you."

   Rarity smiled. "I like that idea."

   Once again, Tender Soul wrote it down for her. "Alright, now the last one you told me about was how throwing food in the trash brought you relief. How can we get that same feeling of relief in a way that's healthier for your eating?"

   "That's an interesting question," Rarity stated. "Let me think about it."

   "Take your time," Tender Soul assured. 

    Rarity thought about the way that throwing her food away brought her relief. She tried to attribute it to the other ways she felt relief. Every time I'm fashion designing, I relax, Rarity thought. I relax when I'm with my friends. She felt her face heat up. I relax when I'm with Applejack. 

   "I relax doing things that I love, being with friends, and being with my- um- I don't know if she's my girlfriend, but the one that I love," Rarity told her.

    "Great! So maybe if you ate while fashion designing, went to dine with friends, and went to dinner dates with your love interest, you'd feel more relief while eating?"

   "Yes!" Rarity exclaimed. She couldn't believe it, but she was beginning to feel excited about her recovery plan. 

   "Wonderful." Tender Soul jotted it down. "Tell me how this week goes!" 

    Tender Soul handed Rarity the new, healthier coping skills and Rarity took them with a smile. With her friends by her side and her spirits renewed, she felt ready to tackle this anorexia once and for all.

                                                                                                            ***

    About a day later, Rarity was weighing herself on the scale. '96.05'. Not good at all, Rarity's logical side thought. 

    The emotional side rushed into her mind and began screaming into her ear. You're right! Your weight still isn't low enough. I know models who weigh even less. 

    Rarity kept staring at that number on the scale as if she were frozen in place. You know, you still don't have to eat. As long as you have a little bit of calories just before you have to go to the hospital, you'll be fine. 

   "But is that what I want?" Rarity asked those voices aloud. "To live my life being sick, unhealthy, and not beautiful? You say this is for beauty, correct?"

    Of course it's for beauty, Anorexia said. When you lose weight, your body will be beautiful just like all of the models in the magazines. 

   "I've been doing some research," Rarity told it. "My friend, Twilight, said it's the key to solving all of life's problems. Personally, I don't believe it can solve all of life's problem, but it can get close. According to those sources, models go on healthy diets, eating smarter and in moderation. So no model has to starve themselves. And even so, they go on to photo shop the models as well. Male and female models both have appearances chosen by the magazine companies to portray a certain look."

   They're never going to accept you at this weight and you know it, Anorexia taunted. At least not the companies that you want to model for. 

   Rarity took a deep breath and glared at that number. "You know what, Anorexia? No! I won't let you control me anymore. Nobody is going to care about what that number is. Nobody is going to know what that number is, but me. The numbers don't define my modeling career. The numbers don't define me!"

    Rarity waited in anticipation for Anorexia's reply. To her surprise, the reply never came. Rarity decided that she needed to treat herself for silencing the urges- just this once.

                                                                                                     ***

   Rarity walked through the door of Sugarcube Corner with a grin. It was almost as if she were lighter than air. 

    Mrs Cake was at the counter, using a washcloth to wipe it down. She looked up to see that Rarity had arrived and smiled. "Why, Miss Rarity! I haven't seen you in awhile. What can I get for ya?" 

   Rarity didn't miss a beat. "One vanilla cupcake, please."

    Mrs Cake picked out a vanilla cupcake from the display and placed it on the counter. "Alrighty. Is that all?"

    "Yes, that will be all," Rarity said. "Thank you."

    "No problem!" Mrs Cake replied. "Your total is $6.99." 

    After Rarity had paid for her cupcake, she walked out the door of Sugarcube Corner, taking a bite out of her cupcake. She sighed in bliss at the creamy vanilla taste that filled her mouth. When Rarity finished her cupcake, she threw away the wrapper with a smirk of delight. There was no guilt that followed. 


(A/N: Ughhh, sorry! I'm so bad at frequent updates. Just know that the next update might be another slow one because I get writer's block so much. But I definitely hope this was worth the wait! Thanks for all the support, y'all! I really appreciate it. <3) 






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