It started with a message on MySpace.

"You might not remember me but I remember you from middle school." It started.

And from there it continued. A then 20 year old Kaye was stunned and surprised. She had just gotten out of a relationship with her son's father Jay who really never wanted to be a father at all but only wanted to be with Kaye for sexual gratification. Kaye had made the decision just a few short months back that she was no longer just going to be an object at his his disposal. She wanted more than just one time back seat hook ups. She wanted a real relationship. Kaye knew that she wasn't going find that with Jay. So she moved on....To his friend. However, to her dismay it didn't last very long. Less than a week to be exact. By October she had come to accept that she was a single mother. Kaye was fine with being single. She had come to accept the fact that she was at the point where she was ok. Until that fateful night. October 12, 2006. She received that very same message. On the other side of that message was a then 20 year old David. Staring at the small square that was her profile picture. He thought to himself if he would even remember who he was. He sat behind his computer and waited. After hours of waiting the very next day was a reply.

"OMG if this is who I think it is I'm gonna cry!" the response read.

And that was it. The conversations went on which had changed to seeing each other. Most times for those sexual hook ups but to her it was much more than that. This was her chance to bag her crush. Kaye had her heart set on being his girlfriend when they were just a tender 12 years old. It didn't matter how many time he made her cry in the bathroom stall or how many times he rejected her requests for one dance. She was willing to wait. For Kaye the wait was over. Was this the chance of a lifetime that she had held onto for years? Her heart said that it was. For David on the other hand it wasn't the same idea for him.....at first. David just wanted what any 20 year old wanted. It was just a sexual advance and as a bonus a ride to work. He never really took her seriously and he took advantage of her. Kaye didn't see it at first. She was more concerned about being a perfect girlfriend for him that she ignored the signs of his actions towards her. David didn't care about her heart or her feelings. He had only cared about himself. Although, David was fighting an internal battle of his own. He was the middle child and his home life was't a perfect picture of his own. David was lonely himself. His loneliness turned into anger which grew into jealousy and overtime and spilled over into his true feeling that began to grow for Kaye within a few short months. Before he recognized what he was feeling he treated her as if she wasn't important. Kaye felt that she could change his heart however. She knew that despite his anger and jealousy, She could mold him into the image she had always saw him as from the moment they met in the 6th grade. Kaye believed David was worth fighting for. She felt that if she could love him hard enough, She could break the icy wall around his heart and he would no longer be angry or jealous. He would be the kind and gentle person that she saw him as. No matter how hard she seemed to love him, David only grew more angry and more jealous. He would shut her out and push her away. He would even make her feel like she was never good enough. Kaye began to realize in order to make it work she had to change the person that she was to fit his image. Not the other way around. There were times where it worked and he would finally love her. In a time where all they had was each other she craved for his heart and nothing else. She had longed for his affection so much that she began to lose herself in what he wanted and didn't even know it. David, however, was content. He had her to himself and still had his freedom to do whatever he wanted. Other girls would call while she was around and even if he would say that he was with her Kaye began to feel like she wasn't enough. She wanted to leave him......but didn't know how to let him go. She had waited to be with him for years and didn't want to give up her chance to keep trying to fix him. She loved David more than she loved herself by this point. David had even become violent which in turn made her violent. Something that she herself knew she didn't want to be. However, this was who she's always wanted to be with. This was who her heart called for. She wanted to change him. David began to love her but was what he was feeling every really love? He would degrade her and play on her deepest fears and insecurities. Over the years she would confide in him about her feelings and he would only use them as chess pieces he could use to his advantage. Her heart was a toy to him and all he had to do was dangle her feelings in front of her and he had her right where he wanted. He kept her sad and heartbroken. Kaye had learned to mask the pain he inflicted on her. It went on that way for the next 10 years. During that 10 year run she was slowly beginning to fall out of love with 12 year old David and it was scaring her. Where is her knight in shining armor that was always there for her when she wore her rose colored glasses? What happened to the love of her life? Where did he go? Those questions would burn in her mind after every argument. He would be off in his own world while she would wait for him to spend time with her. David wasn't interested in her time anymore. For whatever reason he wanted to be by himself. Kaye would once again wonder if she had done something wrong. No matter the circumstances David was blind-fully breaking her.

Laying on the concrete floor still crying for her he couldn't bring himself to the real world. He was trapped in the thoughts of what he had done to the woman he loved and wanted to marry. He began to replay the moments he watched as she would cry was he continued to tear her apart emotionally. The guilt ripped through him and he remembered all of the nights he would watch her sleep after hours of arguing and the tears would fall down her cheeks soaking her pillow as she slept. He was more into wanting to be right that to apologize to her for how he had pushed her away. David was wishing that he had been what she wanted him to be. Hers. Thought of her smile blinded him as the tears fell from his eyes. He could hear the sound of her sweet I love yous deafening him. David was a wreck and he missed her now then he did when she said to him that she couldn't do it anymore. He never realized her pain on her face until the memories of their breakup surrounded him. He finally saw her heartbreak. He cried harder and whispered alone in the dark damp interrogation room.

"Kaye I'm so sorry. Im so fucking sorry."

Words he regrets keeping from her now being said but will never be heard.