We didn't go often into town, but every time it happened I couldn't help it, my eyes kept searching and searching, but I never saw him again.

I didn't even know his name. How could I ever find him?

That wasn't the only doubt consuming me. There was one that I had brought upon myself.

What did I look like to his eyes?

Were we to meet face to face, would he know who I  was?

A part of me regretted not having the courage to show him what I truly look like, and yet the other one was glad that I was at least able to talk to him.

Finally it came the day of my birthday. I was eighteen now, I was legally of age and I could get out of there. Actually I had to, but I wanted to as well. To be exact, I couldn't wait.

Nobody cried when I left, nor did I. I was never happy there, but I was young enough to still have hope that things might change.

I was given a bit of money and sent out into the world on my own.

I could have gone anywhere, literally anywhere in the world, but I chose to stay close, in that same city where I met that boy.

Not only because of him, though. This place held my fondest memories. Where else could I go?

So I left. I counted how much I had with me and I knew that I had to find a place to stay and a job as soon as possible, because the money would not last long.

I decided to change my appearance based on what I thought would be considered attractive, because this way anyone looking at me would see me in the same way.

I wanted smooth perfect skin, big eyes and long eyelashes, I wanted perfect white teeth and rosy lips. I wanted to look so alluring that everyone would be well-disposed towards me.

I rented the cheapest room I could find then I went job hunting.

I didn't have a degree to show off, but I wasn't ignorant. I educated myself reading anything I could find, I would usually spend my time in a corner hoping to be left in peace so I had a lot of time to dedicate to books.

I asked every shop, every bar, every place I saw if they needed help, without luck. They acted very friendly and appeared genuinely sorry having to say no but they already had all the help they could afford to pay.

Not giving up, I entered another one. I was determined to try everywhere until I found a job.

It was a jewellery store. I had never seen a precious stone before but I would learn, so I ventured in.

There was already someone else working there, but I would have tried anyway. I asked to talk to the owner, and I showed him my most agreeable manners, secretly crossing my fingers.

I found myself in front of a petit man with a bald head and a very elegant suit. He was polite but firm when he tried to explain to me why he couldn't hire me.

We were still talking when a man who appeared to be casually looking around suddenly pulled a knife out of his pocket and threatened to slash my throat if he didn't get a bag full of money and jewels in a hurry.

I froze, I had never been so scared in my life. The owner quickly complied and in my terror I tried to turn my head to stare at him, desperately wishing that if he saw on me the face of his utmost desire he might let me live.

I saw him hesitate, his hold loosening allowing me to breath more regularly, then he snatched the bag from the owner's hands and ran out.

A startling thought caused me to run after him. That reaction had given me pause. Instead of taking me hostage he had pushed me away softly.

What had he seen looking at me? Was he so charmed that he couldn't bear to harm me anymore? Could I also have an opposite reaction?

I ran fast shouting at him. I wanted to look and sound like his worst fear.
He stopped and turned, and I could almost see his blood turning to ice in his veins.

He screamed and stumbled backwards, falling but never averting his gaze. I moved slowly towards him. His eyes were wide in fear.

"Give it back!" I ordered, not slowing down.

He held the bag at arm's length, stuttering. "Do... don't come any closer, y y y y you can't be real."

I felt a sense of power that I had never felt before, I heard muffled screams around me but I ignored them, so caught up I was in this new sensation.

I wanted to say something cool like the protagonists of the many adventure stories I had read but I actually had no idea what he was seeing in me so I opted for something simple.

"I am here for you."

I felt a bit silly but I was also having fun, in a twisted sort of way. I guessed they were right calling me freaky after all.

I was two meters away from him, he threw the bag in my direction and ran in the other, screaming. It was over already. I admit that I was a bit disappointed.

With the bag in my hand, I walked back, reverting to the charming look I had created for myself.

The store owner was astonished when I gave him back his stuff. He questioned how I managed to retrieve it, but I didn't have to struggle for excuses because we both got distracted by the commotion outside.

People were talking and pointing towards the direction where my little adventure had taken place. The man opened the door and stepped outside to inquire what had happened, and I followed him.

A woman yelled her answer. "They caught a thief! He must have been crazy, he was shouting that he saw a monster!"

"Not a monster," an old man corrected her. "He saw a ghost."

"You and your ghosts, I'm telling you he saw a monster! I heard it myself from my sister, she said her neighbour was right there and he told her everything!"

"My husband heard from his cousin that it was actually both," a younger woman explained. "The thief was shouting that the ghost was a monstrous version of himself."

"See? A monster!" Concluded the old woman satisfied.

I reputed best not to say anything given the circumstances, but unexpectedly the man at my side brought everyone's attention on me when he exclaimed, "You were there! That's how you got my stuff back, you were there and you must have seen it all with your own eyes! Tell us, was it really a monster? What happened?"