chanyeol's socializing crisis and his hunt for a complete photocard collection.

You know the feeling of wanting to hold someone's hand?

Yeah, Park Chanyeol kinda wants to hold Baekhyun's hand. Not just in a brotherly skinship way, but in an affectionate way. There's something heartwarming about intertwining an important part of your body with someone you trust, a rush of happy hormones. The nice warm feeling that contrasts the cold winter is a bonus too.

Plus, Baekhyun's hands are pretty.

While the taller has big and slightly scarred hands from accidents in the kitchen and from playing instruments, he has nice delicate and feminine hands. Chanyeol wants to ask if he uses hand cream but he quickly realizes that the question is not creepy at all, nooo, Park Chanyeol. Your social skills deserve an award. 10/10.

"Those bastards ditched us." Baekhyun huffs, breaking Chanyeol's train of thought before aggressively taking a sip from his drink.

The two of them only noticed the abandonment when the elder had the urge to steal a piece of cheesecake from Minseok. That was when they belatedly saw the empty plate and found out that their friends disappeared on them without a word whatsoever. Unluckily for Chanyeol, that means that he is now wingman-less. He can already hear Jongdae laughing from a distance at his predicament.

Well... guess I'll die.

Looking at Baekhyun's face as he flutters his eyes shut from the coldness of the beverage, Chanyeol is caught off guard by that feeling a person gets when they find someone so radiantly beautiful that they can't help but look away for a moment to breathe. That eyeliner and mascara pair is doing too many unhealthy things to his palpitating heart.

He looks away from Baekhyun to briefly check the time on his phone. "Well," he finds the courage to speak, "we can always go on without them."

"You make it sound like we're going to war," Baekhyun remarks as he drops his drink back on the table, "I like it. And I like you. Let's get moving and have some fun on our own."

I like you too, Chanyeol wants to reply, but he thinks he's embarrassed himself enough by staring too much and blurting out that the elder is really, really pretty (which he is) the night before. "Okay, Baekhyunnie, but where do you want to go?" he asks instead of saying something disastrous, looking back up to meet the other's eyes.

"You're poor. I'm poor. You like music. I like music. So, uh, let's become even more poor by buying music."

He nods in agreement. "Sounds like a plan." Sounds like a date, his traitorous mind pipes up. "I'm still on the hunt for a Mirotic U-Know photocard."

It's one of Chanyeol's dreaded and worst fanboy nightmares to buy ten albums and not get a single photocard of his bias. Unfortunately, because he's Park hecking Chanyeol, his luck made his dreams a reality when he unboxed his many albums and found not even one U-Know card. At least he got a few extra Won from his classmates from selling his excess Yoochun and Changmin cards.

"You collect photocards too?" Baekhyun's eyes light up at that. "You never told me! Like, I'm so stressed when it comes to collecting SHINee cards because I keep on getting Minho. Dibidibidib, that bitch is probably laughing at me. Twenty albums from their latest comeback purchased in bulk and most of them come with Minho, what the heck? I swear, it's all a ploy to get me to fund their bling bling jackets."

"'Bling bling jackets'," the taller repeats, amused, "well, at least buying a lot of albums gives me the chance to meet them face-to-face." However, despite the constant straining and squeezing of his wallet, he hasn't gotten lucky in the lottery to go to one fan meet... Not that he'll mention it because that's just sad.

Whatever. He'll continue to support his favorite idols until he goes bankrupt and kicked out onto the streets of Korea. There's always more space in his room for another album and poster.

"SNSD's Tiffany can step on me," Baekhyun deadpans, "and slap me and I'd thank her like the queen she is."

"Mood," he agrees wholeheartedly, nodding his head before glancing at the time once more. "...We should get going. I have a photocard collection to complete and a We Got Married episode to catch."

After they dispose of their empty drink containers, ride their bikes, and later arrive at a record store, Chanyeol swings his arm and wraps it protectively around Baekhyun's smaller frame, pulling him ever-so-slightly closer. He's happy to see the other let him perform the act of skinship and opens the door to the small shop.

"Good afternoon, Joohyun-noona," Baekhyun says as soon as they enter.

The cashier looks up from her work and smiles. "Good afternoon, Baek-ah." She bows at the two of them. "Can I help you with anything?" 'Joohyun' has moderately medium length hair with straight bangs and expressive almond-shaped eyes, kinda like one of those idols you'd see performing on Inkigayo. How many people does Baekhyunnie know? Chanyeol wonders because he, unlike the elder, has around... three friends.

She's beautiful, he then adds to his thoughts, but not as beautiful as Baekhyunnie—

"No, thank you, noona," Baekhyun replies, "We're just gonna browse some TVXQ! and SHINee. Photocard hunting."

"Mmm." She cocks her head in Chanyeol's direction. "Is this your friend?"

"Yup! Park Chanyeol, Bae Joohyun. Bae Joohyun, Park Chanyeol." Baekhyun gestures between the two of them. "He's chill and not close-minded, so go wild on your bisexual ass."

Nodding approvingly, Joohyun smiles even wider. "Nice to meet you, Chanyeol-ssi. Please take care of Baekhyun or I will kick your ass to North Korea."

Chanyeol heeds the warning with a quick nod. "I will, noona."

Unwrapping his arm from the shorter's shoulders, he trails behind Baekhyun as they walk past the shelves. He's so... small, Chanyeol blinks, I feel like I want to protect him. His heart clenches, beating a bit faster, and his chest feels heavier. And... you caught some of The Gay Thoughts™, again, Chanyeol.

When he tunes back into the conversation, he finds himself accidentally overhearing Joohyun's whisper to Baekhyun of, "...You know what happens if you get caught, right?"

What.

His head twitches slightly as he resists the urge to snap his head in their direction. Did he hear that correctly? Get caught by whom? What'll happen if we get caught by 〇〇〇? Biting his lip, Chanyeol chooses to act as if he didn't hear it and blocks out Baekhyun's reply because it's none of his business. The curiosity is shoved back to the depths of his mind; nothing good happens when people make assumptions.

He busies himself by thinking of other things, like that goddamn U-Know photocard he has to find because his collection is almost complete.

"How many of each should I get?"

Chanyeol turns to Baekhyun with all his (love) attention, catching the other eyeing the shelf dedicated to SHINee. "I mean," the elder wonders aloud, "Myeonnie-hyung said that I can keep that extra cash from my eyeliner crisis, but who knows when I'll need those Won signs again?" He briefly wonders if he should remind the shorter male of the nightmare fuel from yesternight; he can never look at eyeliner the same way ever again.

"I don't know how much you have, but try saving half," Chanyeol suggests, "use them as emergency funds or for food later."

"Mm. Okay."

It tugs heavily on his heartstrings to have invaded a possibly private conversation. Guilt gnawed on his soul as he hovers behind Baekhyun, draping his long and lanky arms around the other and resting his chin on the soft locks of hair.

Baekhyun stiffens at the bold touch, the 2009, Year of Us album in his hand freezing mid-air.

For a brief moment of panic, the younger moves to retract his hands, thinking he crossed the line of the other's personal space with such an impulsive action. Before he could do so, however, in a movement small and slow, Baekhyun's figure relaxes, easing into the hold and snuggling himself a few subtle centimeters closer to Chanyeol.

"You're warm." Baekhyun exhales, loading his small basket with more albums. His voice is hushed and quiet, as if revealing a secret that he doesn't want the world to hear. "Feels lovely."

Chanyeol's tongue-tied, so he settles with humming out one of the earworms stuck in his head. Thank God that Jongdae ditched him to hang out with Minseok, else they catch the pinkish color of Chanyeol's cheeks and immortalize it forever. He can't help but stare as Baekhyun trails his free hand on the spines of the albums laid on the display.

A voice in his mind that sounds suspiciously like Jongdae laughs at him, You're whipped, bro!

Well, hell yes is Chanyeol whipped, not that he'll say it out loud. He finds himself descending into a deeper circle of hell when Baekhyun begins singing a ballad under his breath. Looking back, who wouldn't fall for those angelic vocals?

"As you live, as you live, as you live," Baekhyun's voice is mesmerizing, the soft tune playing with his heart and throwing it around and squishing it into a tiny ball, "when you're having a hard time, blame me for your sadness..." He wants to take out his phone to record and treasure the singing forever, but he doesn't want to take his eyes off the way Baekhyun's nose scrunches up when his notes come out a little too flat or sharp, or miss the little wisps of breath Baekhyun takes in between pauses in his cover of Saldaga.

He compliments offhandedly, "You have a really nice voice, Baekhyunnie-yah."

"If it's really ha—" Baekhyun's voice cracks mid-line and he stops abruptly, freezing up once more. A surprised noise leaves his lips. "T-thank you." The taller lets out a noise of acknowledgement, shadowing the shorter's waddling towards the girl group section.

"Do you take lessons?"

Baekhyun nods his head, brushing tuffs of his hair against Chanyeol's chin. "I-I take vocal training. My instructors can be... a little bit bitch, but they're nice."

They talk a bit more about music and Baekhyun's batshit crazy dormmates. Baekhyun does most of the talking; his soothing voice like a choir of angels to Chanyeol's ears while the younger does his best to suppress the loud beating of his heart. His voice has to be what the dead hear when they ascend into the heavens.

Is it possible to hear a person's heartbeat in their position?

He hopes not, detaching himself from the shorter to allow him to crouch down to the low display. Knowing himself, Chanyeol will probably say something that will ruin his entire reputation and make him want to crawl under a rock and die so he bites his tongue. He finds himself crouching down beside Baekhyun, peeking at the albums.

In a display of grand impulse, he reaches for Baekhyun's hand.

Chanyeol is both mortified by his lack of self-control and fascinated at how different their hand sizes are. His hands are so soft, he weighs the smaller's hand, gaze fixated on the smooth delicate skin and impeccably trimmed nails. He massages the knuckles with his thumb, drawing circles and swirls onto the flawless skin. The hand fits perfectly into Chanyeol's own bigger one and only then does he look up to see the other's reaction.

Their eyes meet.

Something bolts up Chanyeol's spine at Baekhyun's bemused (lovestruck?) expression. Chanyeol knows he has an expression of a deer caught in headlights and wills for a lightning bolt to zap him into the next life.

Oh, shit, Crush caught you staring, abort mission, abort, don't say anything gay, abort, ABORT—

"You have really pretty hands."

He immediately thinks three things:

1. Fuck.

2. Mission failed.

3. Your apartment building is high enough to guarantee the sweet release of death.

For eleven seconds does he see the pearly white gates of the afterlife, but then he thinks to himself, Nah, I'm pretty sure I'm going to hell.

"U-uhuh, thank you!" Baekhyun squeaks out, voice an octave higher. He snaps back into reality, releasing the other's hand and begins to vomit out words without a filter whatsoever.

"Don't take this the wrong way, errr... It's just that your hands look really nice and pretty and I wanted to hold them." Chanyeol's eyes widen and he attempts to take back what he just said, his hands flailing as he explains himself, "I-it's not that you're not pretty! You're really, really pretty and I hope you know that and-and you have a nice voice like an angel and you're cute and—oh my God, this is embarrassing."

He buries his face in his hands, feeling his blush creep up to the tips of his ears. Good job, Chanyeol, his mind comments, you just exposed your gay ass again.

"No, no! It's okay, thank you for the, um, compliment. I mean, you're also cute and—" Baekhyun releases a bashful whine that he finds endearing. "Just, um, got surprised. Give a guy a warning next time, please."

Shyness from being called 'cute' makes him dig his fingers into his scalp. "O-okay, I'm sorry."

"It's okay, swear, I'll just"—Baekhyun stands up and Chanyeol removes his hands to look at him—"check how much I have left, my poor ass can't handle more bankruptcy." He pats around his pants pockets, hands also checking the pockets of his winter coat. From Chanyeol's angle, the light forms a sort of halo around the elder, making him seem more otherworldly—

Clang!

"Oh, h-here, let me." Chanyeol looks down and reaches for the object of interest despite the other's protests.

His hand wraps around the container as he stretches his arm to reach it. Its packaging is a milky white with designs a luscious shade of bright red, and it weighs a lot in his hand. Curiously, he flips the bottle to identify its contents.

Strawberry lubricant.

Um. He nearly drops the bottle in surprise. "I'm-I'm sorry, oh my God, here you, um, go—" Eyes widening, he snaps his head up and stands up in record time. Baekhyun's face is as red as the container as his shaky hand reaches for the lubricant, shoving it into his inner jacket pocket.

"I'm sorry that you saw that, I'm... super sorry. I'm a mess and that lube isn't mine, it's my friend's, Luhan's—Tha-that bitch probably found a way to put it into my coat, swear!" Pure unfiltered panic is on Baekhyun's face as he backs up and fiddles with his hands, frantically waving to prove his point.

"It's okay, no, it's okay," Chanyeol states, walking forward as the other took a step back, mirroring his movements.

Step. Step. Step.

Baekhyun's head is facing down as his back hits the wall, bangs veiling his eyes and face from Chanyeol's view. The shorter is playing with his fingers again, poking and curling them with each other. Basket filled with albums dangling from his elbow and sandwiched between them, he refuses to meet Chanyeol's gaze.

Worried that he might've crossed a line or something, he gently asks, "Did I say something wrong? Is something the matter?" He reaches to brush a stray strand off Baekhyun's face, feeling (a bit daring and needing an excuse to get closer) concerned.

"Baek—" His voice gets caught in his throat when Baekhyun tilts his head up slightly, eyes visible through his hair as looks back at Chanyeol. Have his eyelashes always been this long?

Only then does he notice their proximity.

At first, he wants to back off and give the other space, but Chanyeol feels rooted to the spot. Inches separates their faces and he kinda wants to get closer. He lightly strokes Baekhyun's cheek with his hand, fascinated by the softness and smoothness.

"I-is this okay?"

Baekhyun nods at his question and Chanyeol smiles at the consent and he smiles back. The taller's heart does backflips as he leans closer, and so does the other. It comes to a point where he can hear the quiet breaths Baekhyun is taking.

His chest feels heavy as Baekhyun drops the basket to the floor and comes closer, their bodies almost completely touching.

Closer...

Chanyeol obliges to the Jongdae-sounding voice. This is really happening, this is really happening, I can't believe my first gay kiss is happening in an album store next to a shelf dedicated to f(x)—

Ring! Ring! Ring!

He jolts backwards, startled by the ringtone. RING DING DONG, RING DING DONG, his mind starts singing and screaming the fanchant.

Annoyance comes first on Baekhyun's face then confusion as he pats around for his phone. "I-I have to make sure no one's dying," he stammers, "I'm sorry for killing the moment."

With that, he turns to face opposite of Chanyeol's direction.

"Oh Sehun, you tall freak of nature. Make this quick before I kick your ass all the way to America."

▲▼▲▼▲

sehun is exo's (un)official cockblock, i don't make the rules.

anyway, hello, my loves !! super late update, i'm sorry, but plot is hAPPENING.

hope your day is going well because mine is ! we're almost at 1.6k, my loves, quadruple from the last chapter ! i'm so proud of you guys and happy that you like my fanfic.

any members you'd like to see points of view from ? more of jongdae ? yifan ? kyungsoo ? tao ? junmyeon ? hmmMM. . .

anyway, buckle up my lovely readers because stuff is coming. ♡ as usual: comment, vote, and add to your reading lists if you enjoyed this self indulgent fanfic.

☆ may you smile today ! ☆