Erik~~

"I wondered when you'd finally be back." Rydersin stands at the foot of her bed, her arms crossed, looking more the part of a stern mother than a woman who is roughly the same age as me.

            Meilin and Xiaozhi slink off before Rydersin can turn her attention to them, and I'm left with only Karn for backup—Karn who immediately says, "Erik has a meeting with the Tresais."

At the mention of my impending story time, the mead in my stomach churns.

            Rydersin sinks onto the edge of the bed, her hands placed behind her, propping her up. "Really?"

            "He—uh—wants to hear about Odette." I curse my hesitation, my nerves. Odette is locked up in a prison. It's not as if standing in front of a mirror and saying her name will allow her to break free.

            Besides I doubt I'm at the top of her hit list; though, I am the only one who'd be on that list that's on the same planet as her.

            I squirm.

            "Everything all right, Blackwood?" Rydersin asks.

            "Why wouldn't it? Who doesn't love telling stories about murderesses?"

"I thought heroes loved sharing the stories of their legendary adventures."

Hero. A word that's so foreign in regard to me. Heroes don't have ulterior motives. All those times I saved Iris, I had hoped I could use her against my family. But the first time, when I pulled her away from the car, I didn't know who she was, didn't know it was her Expiration Date.

I was her hero for a few minutes then? Wasn't I? And at first, I had just wanted to walk away. Leave her to her final hours.

And in France—I was a hero, I suppose. Though I feel as if everyone did twice as much as I did. Having the title of hero applied to me makes me uncomfortable, like an itch under the laces of your shoe. It reminds me how undeserving I am.

"Blackwood?" Rydersin looks concerned now.

"I'm fine. I speak to the Tresais in the morning. Excuse me." I nod to her and Karn and turn to leave.

"Wait."

I hesitate, one foot forward. "Yes?"

"Walk with me?" she asks, already approaching.

"I'm coming to learn I'm not very good company."

"Nonsense." She threads her arm through mine. Having her this close, feeling her pressed against me, sends my head reeling. There's the faintest scent of vanilla coming from her.

"Rydersin," Karn sounds alarmed, "should I come along?"

"You may turn in for the night."

He bows, and I feel his eyes on my neck until we exit the bedroom. Neither of us speaking, I follow her lead. As we walk in silence, she seems at ease while I feel like I might jump out of my own skin.

She takes the stairs, leading us down to the first floor. An Amoris, clothed in a silken dress, walks by, blearily nodding at us.

In front of us are a set of doors leading to the backyard of the Preeminence's home. Through the glass doors neon lights glow like stars fallen to the ground. As I hold the door open, she asks, "How are you feeling?"

"Shouldn't I be the one asking you that?" She's the one whose dreams now rest in the hands of others.

She smiles softly, her face illuminated by the lights of the garden. A creek has been carved into the ground, the orange water of the lake flowing through it. Lights must be placed along the creek's bed because the water glows.

I step up onto the dark wooden path, holding out my hand to help her up. Her fingers are soft, her palm callus free.

"I was exported—exiled, I mean, to France. It was supposed to become my home. I thought I'd be free of Expiration Dates, the suffering they cause those in Elleany, and—"

"Purple eyes that see a little too much?"

I meet her eyes for only a brief second, feeling too ashamed to look into them for any longer than that. Her eyes reflect the orange of the water, the glowing delphiniums, and the pulsing lights of the large cabbage-leaf-like succulents with their baby echeveria. Long ago, Amoria found a way to inject the veins of a plant with a substance that makes the veins glow in the light of the moon. Amoria's moon is larger than Earth's. It hovers in the sky above us, a milky blue compared to the pristine white of Earth's.

"It's okay to be scared, Erik. Hell, every night I lie awake wondering if tomorrow is going to be the day that an Order tells me no and rips my dream away from me. We're all scared of something. Even us Amorians."

We're alone in the garden, most of the household already in their beds. I'm sure there are Veil stationed somewhere. If we weren't alone, I don't think Rydersin would admit her fear.

"I'm not scared of you." Though I'm not certain that's the truth.

She barely has to look up to meet my eyes as close to my height as she is. 

"Does it bother you to always be met with death when you look into someone's eyes?"

She looks away, her eyes shimmering with lights. "It's like a muscle. I don't see it every time. Not anymore. When you're young, it bombards you; it's all you see, but you don't know what you're seeing—what the numbers mean. Though it's not so much actual numbers that you see. It's the feeling, the knowledge of the date." Her lips turn down. "But because you don't know what it means, it doesn't bother you. Not until you learn those numbers mean death." Her eyes flick back to mine. "Eventually, with enough practice—enough effort, you're able to push your ability back. Looking at you, I don't see your death." She takes a step toward me, her gaze now fixed firmly on me. "At the very least, do my eyes scare you?"

I swallow the lump in my throat. She's only a few inches from me.

"No. No, they don't scare me." I wet my lips. "Not being entirely Amorian and having the ability to see death, I feel human even when I know I'm not. I'm something . . . other. Maybe that's why I can't seem to fit in on Earth or here."

"Have you let yourself?"

"Everyone thinks I mess up a lot, and when you mess up, people hate you."

Her hand is suddenly covering my wrist. "Erik, that's not true."

"You wouldn't understand. You look like you've never made a mistake in your life, except maybe asking for my help. I've made so many: Arrietty, Molly, Iris," I say their names, even knowing that most are unfamiliar to her. "Anyone I care about gets hurt by me. You should leave me in Surielius."

Despite everything, her lips curl with amusement. "Are you saying you care about me, Blackwood?"

"I care about seeing you succeed."

"For the money?"

Her words stinging, I look away. "Yes."

She draws her hand back, her fingertips brushing over my skin as they leave me. "We should turn in. I've heard Aries likes to start his day early."

"Right." I run a hand through my hair. "Can I walk you back?"

She steps down off the walkway, her dress sweeping close to the water's edge. "No, it's all right. Sleep well, Erik."

"And you," I say, biting back other words that want to come bubbling up to the surface. Words that would ask her to stay.

Rydersin Torellae leaves me there in the midst of glowing lights with only the foreign stars and moon to keep watch over me.

*****

"I heard her Order was beautiful." Aries, the Tresais of Surielius, adjusts his gray tie, while seated in a loveseat, Katia tucked in the crook of his arm. Rydersin and I sit in two hard wooden chairs, while her three Veil stand behind us. His office is spacious, larger even than Jonas's old office before it was blown up by Andrew. There are three rows of bookshelves, a desk he could prepare for a war on, and in the corner where we are, he's carved out an area where he can relax There's a television, a bar cart, and that loveseat is long enough he could sleep comfortably on it. It might as well be called a couch.

"Were they?" Aries asks.

            "Haven't you seen pictures?"

For the past hour, he's been asking me every single detail, wanting me to recount each minute.

Aries has pulled the knot of his tie down at least two inches. "Yes, but you never know how they alter photos." That makes me wonder what kind of photos his been captured in.

"As beautiful as they are, it was . . . difficult . . . to see past their murderous tendencies."

"What can you tell me that Amoria wouldn't know?" To him France is just another place on a planet he's never visited. It's a name, not a place, not a home. It's a salacious story. That's all it is to him. For me, it was a nightmare I lived through, one I couldn't wake up from. I missed most of the worst parts. I wasn't a prisoner. I wasn't tortured. I didn't lose someone.

What do I know that Amoria doesn't? I didn't live through the salacious parts that he wants.

            They don't know my cousin was also a raggioet and was ready to use that title to sacrifice himself for Iris. The Preeminence of Elleany is Expired. Wouldn't that win points for Rydersin?

            What would Amoria do with an Expired Preeminence? Not that I could reveal it. Most of the Society believes I should be locked up. But Jonas gave me the chance to live free in France and now on Amoria. "When the Preeminence's fiancée"—it feels weird calling her that—"first realized there were Amoris roaming the streets in France and Marking its citizens, the Order members who were in France did not believe her. It's possible lives could have been saved had they believed her sooner."

            Rydersin turns her head only slightly toward me, her eyes wide.

What was that last night? With her and me in the garden? I—I think I wanted her. But she's Rydersin; though, not my boss, we do have a mutually-beneficial working relationship. We can't . . .

            So why do I wonder what she'd feel like against me, what her skin would taste like on my lips?

"We've heard a lot about the raggioet," Aries interrupts my salacious thoughts. "But hardly anything on who she was before. What can you tell me about her? After all you were the one who created her."

            I cough. "I wouldn't put it that way. I saved her from her death."

"But who was she before that?"

            Amoria knows Iris was a rebel, but who was she besides that? "She was . . . deep down . . . sad, I think. She was someone who had her life dictated for her and then when it wasn't, she didn't have the time or the means to make something of it. In a way, my family freed her and gave her a new set of chains in the same night."

"And Clarignon was obsessed with her?"

"I'm not so sure she saw Iris as a person. I think she viewed Iris as an object. A trophy if you will. When any of us have said raggioet in the past, we've always been referring to a corpse."

The Tresais leans forward, his eyes boring into me. "You viewed her the same way, right? As a thing that could be used to hurt the Society, including my kind."

I feel myself shrinking under his gaze. I thought we had been on the right track to winning him over. Does he now view me as a threat? "Iris is a human. She is not like me. But I am also not like you. And for the most part, my family that I wanted to hurt is not like you either. To me, Iris has always been alive. I wanted to use her to make my family pay, but she was always a someone not a something to me."

A smile curls at Aries lips, and he looks at Rydersin. "Why him?"

"I wanted a challenge," she says it simply as if it's the most natural thing in the world. As she moves her hands to her lap, her arm brushes against the sleeve of my jacket.

I stiffen, my nerves buzzing, honing in on that spot on my arm.

Aries traces his lips with the tip of his finger. "You'll be hearing a decision from my Order soon."

Rydersin and I both stand. While I bow, she curtsies, and behind us, the three Veil do the same. Katia wears a cat like smile and pats Aries arm before showing us the door.

How much of what has been said here today will wind up in the press?

*****

A few days later Rydersin and I are called before the Order. They inform us they've ruled in Rydersin's favor. A tremble runs through her, and I know she's relieved this has not been a repeat of Gadfrie.

Now it's to the Head Order in Borilia, the continent where Odette and her Order are being held. Maybe it's foolish to be worried, but after experiencing Surielius, I can't keep the fears from creeping in that the Head Order would be entertained at the prospect of locking me in a room with the Amoris from France.

End of Part 1 of Exposed: Argo Navis

Hello, loves! Thank you so much for your patience with me as I took time away to meet some deadlines. I hope to have something to share with you soon as part of the deadline was me working to rewrite Expired, which I have to finish before I can post the rewrite of Expiration Date. But I am definitely so much closer now!

The next chapter will be the start of Part 2 of Exposed. If you're curious what the constellation name is, I've announced it on the Discord. You can find a link to it in my bio on my profile or by sending me a message!