Part 7: I Care! Do You?
A week or two later everything seemed to come back to normal or so Sameer thought. Naina was coming to terms with her grief. She still stared at him, tried to talk to him through some excuse. But Sameer responded as rudely as he could, trying to guise his concern for her as much as possible. He didn't want her to breakdown or get into anymore trouble because of him. But trouble she had already invited. Naina had fared quite badly in the tests the past week. Infact, she'd just managed to pass with average grades. Sameer had not done that well too, but then academics had never been his forte. But for the first time in both their lives, Naina's grades were comparable to what Sameer had scored. Sameer felt even more guilty, if that was even possible. He knew she was going through a rough patch because of him. But then he hoped time would heal things and Naina would be back on track. He kept an eye on her though, but never let her know that he was looking out after her.
Over the course of few days, Sameer noticed that Naina was looking paler than usual. She seemed to have lost some weight. She did not come to the canteen anymore for lunch like she usually did. And one day after class, she was coming downstairs when she fainted. Sameer, who always made it a point to see that she'd reached her hostel safely, was observing her, hiding at a distance. He forgot his promise to himself of not going after Naina and rushed to help her. In less than thirty seconds, she was in his arms again, but Sameer did not have the time to think about it. "Naina...Naina!" he tried to shake her to bring her back into consciousness. A few people had gathered around by then, trying to help them. Shradhha offered some water, which Sameer sprinkled onto her face. "Ummm...ummm...," Naina stirred and it was then that Sameer breathed again. She opened her eyes to find herself in Sameer's arms- again, with some ten of their classmates watching them. She careful moved away from Sameer, and he, realizing that he was holding her in front of everyone, let go too.
As Naina recalled how she'd fainted, she heard Shradhha screaming at her. "Khana khati hai nahi tu...toh giregi nahi to kya hoga...paise mujhse le le...bol to rahi hun...mess ka bhi bill nahi bhar rahi...ek exam ki wajah se tere gharwale tujhe bhukha maar denge kya...?" Shraddha was ranting. Sameer's ears caught the words, "money? Shortage of money? Naina? Why? Her family is not giving her money?" He looked at her questioningly, unable to hide worry from his face. Naina stayed mum and just averted her eyes from him. "Main theek hun Shradhha...tum log jao...aati hun hostel...!" she said. Sameer knew that the order was meant for him too. Shradhha persisted, but Naina was firm. Seeing she would not hear of help, Shradhha agreed and gave her bottle of water to Naina to drink and come around when she feels better. Naina smiled at her, and conveyed her gratitude, as she waited for all- including Sameer to leave. But he did not move.
Everyone dispersed and a few minutes later, Naina and Sameer were alone. It was then that Sameer asked, "kya hua hai tumhe...khana kyun nahi khati tum?" Naina did not respond and instead, tried to get up. "Ab kyun haal puch raha hai yeh...main marun jiyon ise koi fark bhi padta hai?" she thought bitterly. "Naina...main kuch puch raha hun...!" Sameer insisted, his voice more of a command now. Naina had got up by now and without even giving him a glance, she was about to go, when she felt Sameer's hold on her arm. That unleashed the anger she was trying to hide from everyone- including him. Naina looked at him, her eyes spewing fire as she jerked her hand out of his hold. "Mujhe kisi ki khairaat ki zarurat nahi hai, aur tumhari to bilkul nahi!" Naina hollered at him. Sameer was taken aback. "Dekho main sirf tumhara haal...," he started. "Tum hote kaun ho mera haal jaanene wale...Sameer...main koi khilona nahi hun...ki jab tumhara man kiya tum baat kar loge...jab man kiya muh pher loge...!" she snapped. There was an uneasy silence as Sameer felt her words prick him. "Naina...tum gussa baad mein kha lena...pehle please kuch kha lo...tum bahot kamzor ho gayi ho...chalo canteen me chalte hain...main khilata hun tumhe...," Sameer smiled as he tried to soothe her. But Naina did not move. Sameer felt her anger intensify and mix with misery. "Chalo Naina...," he coaxed again. "Sameer mujhe akela chod do...please...tum jao...!" she said. "Naina...lekin....," Sameer started and then he saw the look in her eyes. "Dekho Naina...tum nahi khaogi to main bhi nahi khaunga...," Sameer said. Naina looked at him questioningly, "kyun?" Sameer had no answer.
Naina made to leave again when he spoke, "theek hai...mere saath nahi khana...koi baat nahi....hostel jaake kha lo...ye lo...tumhara mess ka bill pending hai na...tum ye le lo...aaram se wapis kar dena...," and opened his wallet to take out some money to lend to her. He'd realized the whole scenario by now. Naina's family would have stopped her pocket money and expenses because of her bad grades this time. And hence she was not able to pay her dues or get enough to eat. The only thing he'd missed out on was that even when she had money, she'd lost her appetite after the fall-out with Sameer.
Naina's hurt increased as she saw him offer her money. Is this her value to him? Does he think she can be brought by money? Can money solve everything? He can hurt her whenever he feels like and then try to be kind to her, help her out. Why was it that when she was in a problem, he was almost always there to help her out. And when she was not, he would himself create a problem by his unpredictable behavior. Naina looked down at the bundle of notes in his hand that he was offering her. Her simmering anger had a resurgence. She took the money and threw it at Sameer's face. "Paise se insaan nahi kharede jaate Mr. Maheshwari...Naina ko bilkul nahi...dosti karni hai to sacche dil se karo...varna jhoothi fikr dikhane ki zarurat nahi!" she stated, her anger visible despite her calm demeanour. Sameer looked on at her incredulously. That broke the last straw of his patience. He had an urge to shout back at her, but he gulped down his words, gathered the money she had thrown and before leaving, commented, "paise nahi chahiye to seedhe bol deti...aise fekne ka haq tumhe nahi hai...ye bhi kisi ki mehnat ki kamayi hai...aur haan Sameer fikr karta hai to dil se...jhoothi fikr karna mujhe aata nahi hai!" With this, he pulled his bag over his shoulders and left, without even giving as much as a glance to Naina, who stood rooted to the spot.
***
"Naina! Naina! Pata hai Sameer ka accident ho gaya...," Shradhha came running to her room an hour later. "Kya?" Naina felt her world crash. "Wo kaisa hai...kya hua use...," she could feel her heart throbbing in her chest, her blood pressure rising to dangerous levels for sure. "Theek hai wo...zyada chot nahi aayi use...thoda sa sprain hai...thode scratches...," Shradhha's words were lost on her as Naina drifted into another land- where she was hell worried for him. "Maine socha tujhe bata dun...teri aur Sameer ki dosti...," Shradhha trailed off. Naina looked up at her in shock, beginning to get uncomfortable. The kind of friendship she and Sameer had shared was better off as a secret. Sensing Naina's unease, Shradhha changed the topic, "usse milne jana hai tujhe? Baaki log milke aa gaye hain!" Naina nodded and got up to leave. "Naina...tu milke aa...main kal mil lungi usse...thoda kaam hai mujhe," Shradhha made an excuse so that Naina would be able to meet Sameer alone. She'd figured out that the two had something brewing between them and also knew about the ongoing fight, but did not know of the reason behind it.
Naina reached Sameer's hostel. It was evening time and all the boys were out and about. Carefully, she took permission from the warden's office to meet Sameer, and ignoring the whistles from random guys, she made her way upstairs. She'd been to his room only once before, the night she'd been drunk, the night they'd made out for the first time. As she reached the door of his room, she took in a deep breath, before knocking on the door.
Tap...tap! Sameer heard the knock. Frankly saying, he'd been pissed off at people popping by to meet him, expressing their concern (fake in Sameer's opinion) about his sprained leg, advising him to be careful while riding the bike. But Sameer was fuming inside. How could she? She just threw the wad of notes on his face. He was just trying to help her out and look at her arrogance! "Ekdum baap pe gayi hai...khadus kahin ki!" he thought.
Naina's harsh words had had a resounding effect on Sameer. He'd been so enraged after the incident that he'd been overspeeding on his bike, failed to see the turn in time, and fell down as the bike careened over to a side. Thankfully, he hadn't been hurt much. Only that he saw his ankle swell and was finding it difficult to walk. Sameer stood there for a while and squinted to see if he could get some help on the lonely road. But there was no one in sight. Finally he somehow got up and tried to walk over to his bike, when he saw an auto-rickshaw coming his way. He stopped the auto, got inside and asked the driver to take him to a doctor. An X-ray and few check-ups later, the doctor had told him it was a sprain in the ligament, bandaged his ankle, gave some medicines and advised him rest for a few days. Sameer took an auto back to the spot of the accident and with the help of the doctor's assistant, brought the bike back to his hostel parking. There everyone had rushed to him seeing his injury. Sameer had to pacify them, tell them he was okay, so that he would be able to go to his room and rest in peace.
But peace was far away from him as Naina's words continued to echo in his ears. How could she say he was trying to buy her out? He was only trying to help her no? But no, Miss Akdu can have none of it. She has to say that my concern is fake. "Tabhi...har roz intezaar karta hun na...ki wo theek se hostel pahunch jaye...tabhi to giri to uthane duada...wo bhookhi hai to mere gale se bhi nivala nahi utara...!" he was in his thoughts, when he heard the door knock yet again.
Irritatedly, he limped over to the door, the crepe bandage adorning his ankle, the pain searing through his leg as his feet pressed onto the ground. As he opened the door and saw Naina standing outside, he forgot all about self-control. "Bang!" he slammed the door shut on her face. He suddenly felt as if the temperature of Bombay had risen by at least 10 degrees at that moment. "Ab kyun aayi hai yeh?" Sameer was thinking angrily, when Naina knocked the door again. "Kitna akdu hai...muh pe koi darwaza band karta hai!" she was now rethinking her decision of coming over to see him. But then her love for him overpowered her anger, and she knocked the door yet again.
After 5-6 taps, he finally opened the door again, but his eyes made sure she understood that she wasn't welcome. "Kya hai?" he snapped. "Wo tumhara accident hua...chot lagi tumhe...toh...," Naina started. "Toh? Tumhe kya karna hai...?" he said curtly. "Sameer...mujhe fikr...," Naina started again. "Fikr...kya kaha...ohhh...tumhe meri fikr ho rahi thi...kyun...?" his voice was cold as ice, sharp as a spear. "Sameer...wo I'm...," Naina tried to soothe him. Sameer cut her short. "Shut-up Naina! Tum samajhti kya ho khud ko...tum bhookhi thi to mujhe bhi tumhari fikr ho rahi thi...aur tumne kya kaha ki main natak kar raha hun...paison se tumhe khareed raha hun...kitni choti soch hai tumhari...chee!" It was he who hollered at her now.
Naina was feeling extremely guilty now. She realized that she'd been too harsh at Sameer, but the sudden changes in his behavior left her completely nonplussed. "Tum bhi to mujhse badtameezi se baat kar rahe the itne din se...," was all she managed to say. Sameer stood there for a while looking at her, before he realized the pain in his ankle was getting unbearable. "Aahhh...," he uttered as he staggered over to his bed and sat down. Naina took this as a cue that Sameer had finally relented. She entered inside the room and quietly closed the door behind her. Sameer's eyes were fixed to the ground. He still seemed angry. Naina saw the plate of food lying untouched on his table, and the unopened packets of medicines next to it. Naina pulled a chair in front of him and settled herself there. She was sure that she should not be anywhere close to Sameer. She loved him too much to make him uncomfortable.
They both sat in silence for a while and then Naina spoke, "khana kha lo!" Sameer turned his face away from her and Naina took it as a no. "Dekho...main bhi kha lungi...ye jhagada ab khatam karte hain...?" she suggested timidly. She saw Sameer's face soften a little. "Please?" she added. Sameer sighed. "Paise isliye de raha tha kyunki main samajh gaya tha tumhara khadus baap kam number aane se chidh gaya hoga...aur tumhe paise nahi de raha hoga....," he muttered. "Galti bhi to meri hi thi...aur jab paise the tab bhi khana gale se nahi utar raha tha...tum ukdhate ho to kuch acha nahi lagta Sameer," she said. Sameer looked at her in surprise. Her eyes did speak of concern for him. He jerked himself out of his reverie, dissuading himself from softening up on her all again.
"Tumhare baap se achi to meri maa hai...kamse kam khane ke paise to deti hai!" he mumbled. "Acha baba theek hai...par ab gussa baad mein kha lena...pehle khana kha lo," she smiled as she reiterated the lines he'd used to cheer her up just a while back. Naina took the plate of food and offered it to him. Sameer made no effort to take it. He was still somewhat angry. Left with no option, Naina broke a piece of chapati, added some sabji to it and offered him to take a bite. Sameer was surprised at her gesture. So surprised that he couldn't say no! He brought his face forward and took the bite from her hands. As he gulped down the food, he too tore a piece of roti-sabzi and offered it to her. She quietly ate from his hands and he from hers. And finally, a smile flickered over each of their lips. "Khadus to hai tumhara baap...aur tum kam nahi ho...," Sameer added good-naturedly. "Tum kam akdu ho...gusse mein bike chala rahe hoge aur pair tudwa liya...!" she responded. Sameer was taken aback at how easy it was for Naina to guess his state of mind. "Aise baat karogi to gussa nahi to kya pyaar aayega?" he blurted. And then realized he'd uttered the word 'pyaar', not meaning to. Naina too shifted in her chair as she heard that word from his mouth. Both looked at each other and then chose to ignore it and continued to eat. Post the meal, Naina helped him take the medicines. As she put the glass of water back onto the table, she came close to Sameer again. His heart started panging. He looked into her eyes and knew that she was feeling the same that he was. The attraction was back, now that the anger had subsided. Before either of them could realize, Naina had planted a kiss onto Sameer's lips- a gentle kiss, a kiss which Sameer savoured and feared at the same time. And then Naina moved away, bade him goodbye and left the room.
At that moment Sameer knew, that he could not be just friends with Naina. Today had again been a dangerous moment. If Naina had not stepped back in time, the inevitable would have happened. "Gosh! He was thinking of making-out with her, when his ankle was throbbing with pain. This woman will make me go mad one day!" he mused helplessly. He lay down on his bed again and decided that he would go back to his earlier resolve of staying as far away from Naina as possible.
As Naina closed the door, the smile that had come upon her lips, refused to leave her face. A meeting with Sameer for just half-an-hour had made Naina forget all the pain that she'd gone through over the past few days. She finally felt satiated and it was not because of the food. He was talking normally to her again and the smile on his face made Naina dance with glee deep down. However, it was with great difficulty that she had pulled herself away from Sameer- lest it gets uncomfortable for both of them again. ""Love would find a way," Naina assumed as she walked back to her hostel, feeling upbeat after the meal and the return of her friendship with Sameer.
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