"Naina! I love you!" he smiled at her.

"I love you too Sameer!" she clasped his hand.

"Ab mujhe chod ke to nahi jaogi na?" he questioned, his thumb brushing against the back of her palm.

"Jeete jee nahi!" she beamed and nestled her face against his chest.

His hands caressed her hair for a while, breathing in the scent that always enthralled him, as he drew her closer to his chest. "Shaadi karogi mujhse?"

Her eyes lifted to his in surprise, and then he saw them aglow with joy. "Sachi?" she whispered.

His finger locked itself under her chin and he nodded, elated himself.

"Haan Sameer, haan!" she exclaimed jubilantly. She buried her face in his chest again and crushed him into a tight hug, which Sameer reciprocated with equal zeal.

They were busy preparing for their wedding. All was set. The date, the mandir, the pandal, the garlands, the ensembles.

Sameer was on his way to the venue, decked in a beautiful cream coloured sherwani, embroidered in threads of gold and red. A beautiful red turban laced with golden strands adorned his forehead. As he clicked his car door open, he heard a loud yell from his home.

He turned back to the house, recognized his Nanu's shriek and rushed back inside, only to find his Nanu sprawled across the slippery wet bathroom floor, a pool of blood around his head, writhing in pain.

"Nanu!" he yelped as he lifted him onto his shoulders and dragged him to the hospital for treatment, forgetting, at the moment, about his impending wedding.

Hours jerked by and then Sameer found himself rushing to the temple, only to see Naina looking resplendent in a bright red lehenga. He took big strides towards her, wanting to explain to her the reason for his delay, but before he could reach the mandap, the man poised in front of her turned.

Arvind was grinning at him, dressed in a sherwani and turban exactly like his. Sameer looked down and saw himself stripped of his wedding ensemble. He was dressed in a plain shirt and a pair of brown trousers. As he faced the mandap again, he saw the red vermillion mark gleaming on Naina's forehead and the unmistakeable glint of gold around her neck.

She'd apparently got tired of waiting for him....

"Nooooo!!!!" he yelled.

"Sameer! Kya kar raha hai beta?"

Sameer lifted his eyes and saw Nanu standing in front of him, in his usual crisp white dhoti and kurta, but an unusual, ethereal glow surrounded his being tonight. Or was it a day? Sameer couldn't make out, for the sky seemed tinted in the dusky shades of dull orange and a pale red hue spread all around them.

Sameer squinted as a pair of big wrought golden gates swam into view, a few feet away from his Nanu. Floating- as if nestled in the midst of clouds. His eyed darted all around him. There was a vast expanse of nothingness, an eerie silence around, and an expanse of clouds stretching till eternity. He too was seated on puffs of cloud he realized and so was Nanu, who was standing or perhaps floating right in front of him.

"Ye hum kahan hai Nanu?" he spluttered.

"Jahan tujhe abhi nahi hona chahiye!" Nanu's serene, solemn voice rocked his ears.

"Matlab?" he asked.

"Matlab ke Sameer...ab mujhe jaana hoga...aur tu yahan nahi aa sakta...abhi nahi...wapis jaa beta!" Nanu requested.

"Nahi Nanu...main aapko chod ke nahi jaunga...wo Naina bhi chali gayi mujhe chod ke!" Sameer stated with misty eyes.

Nanu came to sit besides him on the willowy mat of clouds. "Wo sone ka gate dekh raha hai?"

Sameer nodded.

"Beta...aaj tu ek dorahe par hai...aur yahan liya gaya faisla teri zindagi ka, teri taqdeer ka rukh badal sakta hai...tu mere saath aa sakta hai, us gate ke andar...par tab tu wahan hoga, jahan tujhe abhi nahi hona chahiye...ye raasta aasaan hai...ab peeche dekh...wo dusra rasta tujhe wapis le jaayega jahan se tu yahan aaya hai...wo raasta kathin ho sakta hai, par wahi sahi hai...wahi rasta tujhe apni manzil ki ore lekar jayega...wo raasta jispe chalke tu apne Nana ke sapne, unke adhure kaam, unke armaan pure karega...".

"Main aapko chod ke kahin nahi jaunga!" Sameer declared, misty-eyed. "Aapke bina kya sahi rasta, kya galat...aap jahan ho, main wahin rahunga!"

Nanu sighed and brought Sameer to a side hug. "Beta! Zindagi mein kuch cheezein hamare haath mein nahi hoti. Zindagi kabhi ek haseen sapna hoti hai, to kabhi ek bhayanak haqeeqat. Lekin jeeni to sabko padti hai. Kisi ke aane se ya jaane se ye rukti nahi...usi tarah teri zindagi bhi nahi rukegi...na mere jaane se...na Naina ke jaane se! Kisi kahani ka ant tabhi hota hai, jab wo uparwala chahta hai...!"

"Agar tujhe lagta hai ki aaj teri zindagi mein jeene layak kuch nahi bacha...to ek cheez hai jo tujhe teri manzil tak leke jayegi..tere Nanu ka sapna...main hamesha chahta tha ki tu ek bahot bada businessman bane...apna, apne nanu ka aur hum sabka naam roshan kare...beta, tujhe kismet ne bahot thokar maari hai jaanta hun...lekin ab main chahta hun ki tu kismet ko thokar maar....aur zindagi se wo cheen jo tera haq hai...kya pata is sab mein tu fir muskurana bhi seekh jaye?" Nanu smiled down at his grandson affectionately.

"Nanu! Lekin main Naina ke bina kaise jeeyunga...wo Arvind ke saath...aap kuch karo na!" Sameer pleaded.

"Beta...teri Nani bhi to saalon pehle chal basi thi...to kya maine jeena chod diya? Nahi na? Kyunki hum sirf khud ke liye nahi...dusron ke liye bhi jeete hain...wahan tere piche teri maa hai...tere dost hain- wo Rahu Ketu tere...aur kahin na kahin Naina bhi to hai...soch agar use pata chalega ki uski wajah se tune duniya chod di to shayad wo bhi nahi jee payegi...kya tu use taqleef de paayega?...Sameer! Agar Naina tere bina jeena seekh sakti hai...to tu bhi seekh sakta hai...duniya mein kuch bhi sthayi nahi hota...jeevan pal pal apne rang badalta hai!" Nanu explained as he patted Sameer's head lovingly.

"Mere liye...ja wapis...aur duniya ko dikha de ki tu Jay Prakash Maheshwari ka nawasa hai...tu himmat nahi haarne wala! Dikha de sabko ki tu apne nanu se bhi bada banega...unka naam raushan karega! Jaa beta! Ab mere aaram ka waqt ho raha hai!" Nanu got up from his place and took a last, long look at his grandson, whom he'd always loved more than his own life. And now that he'd lived his life and it was time to let go of all bondings, he did the only thing he could do at this stage. He put his hand on Sameer's forehead, and blessed him, hoping he would live a blissful, contended and successful life.

"Nanu!" Sameer shrieked as he saw Nanu making his way towards the golden gates. Nanu turned and waved at him, "jaa Sameer! Teri zindagi mein abhi bahot kuch baaki hai! Jaa mere bacche jaa!"

Sameer looked at Nanu's retreating form and realized he had to go back. He couldn't be with Nanu.

"Nanu!" he yelled again, but Nanu was gone. Sameer had to move. Move towards Nanu or back towards life. He took a deep breath and made a decision.

And there the ECG monitor announced his arrival back into the mortal world.

Vishakha held Sameer's hand all this while, her wan face fixated on her son's pallid one. She'd never seen Sameer so helpless. Not even when she'd left him to fend for himself at the tender age of five in a hostel far away from home. His grandfather's death must have weighed on him much more than she'd anticipated. His hand felt cold, lifeless and Vishakha gulped. The pristine white décor of the hospital armed with the state of the art equipments and medical facilities, and the best doctors in Ahemdabad, hadn't been able to assure them that Sameer could live for certain.

"An accidental or deliberate overdose of sleeping pills!" the doctor had declared. She had not missed his condescending gaze that stated, "another one of those rich mothers, who think love can be substituted with money!" And Vishakha had to look down, because she knew she'd done exactly that. She'd never cared about what Sameer felt, or what he wanted or what he needed. She'd done what was best for her and decided it was best for them both. And today she regretted it as she waited with bated breath for a sign of active life in her now comatose son.

"Sameer had wanted to die? Why? Why had he wanted to die? It was because she failed him as a mother! Because she couldn't fill up the void left by his Nanu!" Vishakha crumbled in despair, but Pandit had steadied her, whilst Munna had explained to her that the reason behind Sameer's actions was the fact that he'd been jilted by a girl he'd come to ardently love- more than his own life as it was now obvious. Vishakha wanted to seek out that girl who'd inflicted such tragedy upon her son and strangle her with her own bare hands, but she could do nothing. The chapter was closed as Pandit had told her. The girl was married off to someone else, even before Sameer had a chance to tell her about his feelings.

She sat sniffing in agony, Sameer's hand clutched in hers, praying fervently to God to revive her son. Her chants were suddenly interrupted by a shrill beeping sound. "Doctor! Nurse!" Vishakha jumped from the stool besides Sameer's bed and rushed to fetch the doctors, alarmed by the erratic, jarring beeps of the monitors in the room.

The ward was immediately cleared. Family huddled around the door as the doctors worked with equipments, monitoring the patient's response. Munna and Pandit scurried down the hospital alleyways, with presciptions in hand. Vishakha fumbled with her purse strings as she waited again behind the same ICU where her father had been admitted just a few months back. This time, it was her son fighting death. But would he emerge victorious or would he too wither away in suicide was what she trembled to think of. Her husband tried to placate her as she erupted into tears again. For nothing could alleviate her pain at the moment.

Sameer had ingested an almost lethal dose of sleeping pills. He was in luck that Ramdhari's sleep had decided to break that night or else they would have lost him for sure.

If Ramdhari had not woken up to go to the bathroom last night, if he hadn't thought of acting on his whim to check if 'Sameer baba' had indeed had his food, if he hadn't thought of climbing the window to check upon him when he failed to answer the door despite repeated thuds; most importantly if Ramdhari had chosen to ignore his hunch, she would probably have been attending her son's funeral. Which she hoped against hope that she would not now.

Ramdhari had entered through Sameer's open window and saw Sameer lying splayed besides his bed, white froth emanating from his jaw. He'd rushed to shake him into consciousness and checked his pulse, which was slowly, steadily weakening. "Sameer bhaiya!" he'd yelled as he thrust the almost lifeless boy onto his shoulders and phoned for an urgent taxi. Those twenty minutes to the hospital had been unnerving enough for him- as if he'd been replaying the exact scenario with his master two months back. After getting Sameer admitted and feeling relieved, albeit for the instant that Sameer was alive, Ramdhari checked the yellow pages in the hospital reception and dialled Munna's number. In the next twenty minutes, Munna and Pandit had been besides him, scared out of their wits for their best friend, their brother, yet fully in command of the situation. Vishakha had been informed and she'd rushed along with her husband on the next flight to Ahemdabad.

Those eighteen hours of turmoil that Sameer's close ones and not-so-close ones went through must have been one of the most crucial days of each of their lives.

Vishakha and her husband saw the door to the ICU open and Munna and Pandit rushed to hear what the doctor had to say. "He's stable now. Out of danger. Use do teen ghante mein hosh aa jana chahiye! Hum use private ward me shift kar denge, fir aap usse mil sakte hain...and please be careful jab aap usse baat karein...he's emotionally drained out...use aapka support, aapka pyaar chahiye!"

***

Sameer saw his friends and his mother enter the hospital ward, their faces gaunt with worry. Even his step-father looked frayed. He tried to prop himself onto the pillows and Munna and Pandit rushed to help him. As Vishakha sat down on the stool besides his bed, she held his hand strongly and started crying relentlessly, "I'm sorry Sameer! Beta...I love you! Please fir kabhi aisa mat karna...dekho hum sab pe kya beeti hai!" Sameer listened in silence, not used to such displays of affection from his mother since the past fifteen years or so. His breathing was still haggard, and his eyes kept darting to the door of the ward, still expecting to see Naina dash through them at any instant and fling her arms around him, proclaiming her love for him, castigating him for acting so irresponsibly, telling him that she'd left her husband and that she was his forever.

"Sameer?" Vishakha's voice brought his eyes and focus back to his mother. "Wo ladki tumhare liye sahi nahi thi! Jo itni jaldi tumhe bhul gayi...jisne tumhe tab chod diya jab tumhe uski sabse zyada zarurat thi...," she paused at the hardened look in her son's eyes. Sameer's face was blazing with anger. With great difficulty, he jerked his hand out of his mother's clasp and muttered, his breathing uneven, "jayie aap yahan se!" That similar betrayal flashed in front of his eyes- visuals of a five year old crying desperately for his mother to come and take him back from the marooned corridors of the hostel, cries which'd fallen on deaf ears.

There was no mistaking the contempt in his voice. "Sameer! Main tumse haath jod ke maafi maangti hun beta...please kabhi aisa mat karna...kisi ke liye nahi! Tum chaho to mujhse nafrat karo...lekin apni jaan se mat khelo beta!" Vishakha pleaded.

"Mom...please leave! Mujhe thodi der akela rehna hai! Munna, Pandit...Mr. Somani...please!" Sameer requested, his voice pained due to the emotional as well as the physical onslaught. As he saw his near and dear ones leave, Sameer felt his eyes brim with tears again as he realized that Naina and Nanu would both be his past now. Trying to steel himself again, he tried to think of how to pick up the pieces of his shattered life and start again! All over again! Alone!