***Trigger warnings for mentions of addiction, an eating disorder, and food.***

Start the song. It's Moondust (stripped) by Jaymes Young.

It was becoming pretty clear to Josh that Tyler really wasn't aware of how unhealthy his relationship with food was at the moment. He didn't eat lunch when Josh did, no matter how hard Josh tried to convince him to at least eat some soup or something, and he looked extremely overwhelmed whenever food was presented to him. The most Josh managed to feed him at lunch was a couple bites of chicken noodle soup, but he still praised the hell out of Tyler for eating those couple bites.

"Want to come with me when I go pick Jordan and Abbie up from school?" Josh asked as he put Tyler's unfinished soup into a plastic container and tucked it into the fridge in the hopes that Tyler might eat a couple more bites later.

"Sure," Tyler agreed from where he was sitting on the couch, doing homework from the pile of books sitting beside him.

His backpack was in the wash with Josh's hoodie and Tyler's overalls, all of which having received their fair share of blood spattering the day before. His hair was messy, and he was just wearing one of Josh's shirts and a borrowed pair of boxers. Josh's clothes looked bigger on him than they used to, and Josh was a little bit worried that Tyler didn't see how loose everything he wore seemed to be on his shrinking frame. Hickeys were peeking out from the neckline of Tyler's shirt, and he had a couple on his thighs as well. He seemed calmer now that Josh wasn't trying to feed him. Josh didn't like that.

"What class is that for?" Josh asked curiously, shifting Tyler forward to sit behind him and massage his back as he glanced at the complicated formulas scribbled across Tyler's notebook.

The muscles in Tyler's back relaxed under Josh's touch as he continued to scribble out numbers, letters, and symbols that meant absolutely nothing to Josh. "Calculus," Tyler replied distractedly.

"Shit," Josh replied, making Tyler chuckle.

"Yeah, you're telling me," Tyler agreed. He pointed to the full sheet of scribbles in front of himself and looked over at Josh to tell him, "This is only the first problem."

"Shit," Josh repeated, smiling when Tyler laughed. "Need me to disappear for a minute while you work on that?"

Tyler kissed Josh's cheek before looking back to his homework. "No, but you can keep rubbing my back if you want."

"You bet your boots I want to keep rubbing your back," Josh replied without hesitation, making Tyler laugh again. "Let me know if you need me to fuck off for a bit though. I'll miss you, but I'll do it."

"Will do," Tyler confirmed amusedly.

Josh pressed a light kiss to Tyler's shoulder as he watched Tyler continue to solve the never-ending equation in front of him. Tyler giggled when Josh swore as he watched the younger man turn the page in his notebook and continue to work on the same equation. Josh kissed Tyler's shoulder again, massaging Tyler's lower back with gentle fingers as he did so.

"The answer is four," Tyler decided finally, beaming when Josh swore again.

"All that, and the answer is four?" Josh asked in mock frustration. "Damn, baby boy. You're smart."

Tyler grinned. "It's not that hard," he insisted quietly.

"Shit. I must be a fucking idiot then," Josh decided amusedly, earning an eye roll from Tyler.

"You aren't," Tyler insisted.

"Not an idiot. Just a deadbeat," Josh decided, laughing when Tyler pouted at him. "Speaking of deadbeats, I gotta take a smoke break. Keep up the good work, Steve Jobs."

Tyler whined when Josh slid out from behind him and left to get a cigarette from his bedroom. "Smoke in here! I don't want you to leave," Tyler requested from the living room.

"I think I've bestowed enough secondhand smoke upon you in the past twenty-four hours. You're too cute to have black lungs," Josh called back to him as he grabbed a lighter off of his dresser and slipped a cigarette out of the pack that had been sitting beside it.

"Can I come sit outside with you then?" Tyler asked hopefully. "There's fresh air out there, so it cancels out."

Josh laughed as he left his room. "Maybe next time, kid. I expect problem two to be finished by the time I get back. If it's finished, I'll force you to take a break to make out with me for a minute. If it isn't, you don't get to kiss me until you've done all of your calculus homework."

Tyler pouted, watching Josh pull on a pair of sneakers before opening the front door. "You're an asshole," Tyler told him grumpily.

Josh grinned, setting the cigarette between his lips and lighting it as he stood in the doorway. Tyler beamed when Josh walked back over to him as it lit, crouching down beside him as he inhaled the first cloud of smoke before blowing it out in Tyler's face. Tyler giggled, leaning in to kiss Josh, only for him to stick the cigarette back between his lips and stand up. Tyler whined dramatically.

"You only like me for my secondhand smoke," Josh complained teasingly around his cigarette as he walked back to the front door.

"I do not!" Tyler argued, his lower lip jutted out into another pout.

Josh snickered. "Great. This is my last cigarette ever then. I will never smoke again."

Tyler looked at Josh for a second before deciding, "Okay. I support that. I love when you're healthy."

Josh smiled slightly, blowing out a plume of smoke as he did so. "I love when you're healthy too. Wanna make a deal?"

"What kind of deal?" Tyler asked curiously, eyeing Josh a bit warily.

"You finish that soup in the fridge, and I won't smoke for the rest of the day," Josh proposed. "I'll even smash this cigarette out right here and now."

"A week," Tyler bartered, making Josh smile slightly.

"Two days," Josh haggled.

"Three," Tyler compromised.

Josh smirked. "You want me to heat that up for you then?"

Tyler looked back down at his homework. "You have to feed it to me in your underwear, or I'm not eating it."

Josh laughed, stubbing his barely smoked cigarette out on the porch railing before heading back inside. As soon as the door closed, he was shedding clothes until he was in his briefs. He saw Tyler smirk slightly as Josh walked past him to heat up the soup.

"Damn. If I knew you'd agree that easily, I would've said you had to be naked," Tyler told Josh amusedly without looking up from his homework.

Josh smirked as he dumped the soup into a bowl and popped it in the microwave. As soon as the microwave was whirring, he stepped out of his briefs and threw them at Tyler, who laughed when they landed on his notebook.

"I'm easily persuaded," Josh told Tyler through a grin as he grabbed a cup out of the cabinet next to the sink and filled it with water, handing it to Tyler over the back of the couch.

"You're definitely easy," Tyler agreed jokingly, making Josh snort.

"We have that in common," Josh pointed out.

Tyler hummed happily. "Lucky us."

"Lucky us," Josh agreed.

"I have to eat all of the soup?" Tyler asked without looking up from his homework, trying to hide how anxious he was getting about this.

Josh eyed Tyler carefully, knowing this would backfire really quick if it left Tyler feeling triggered instead of safe. As much as Josh wanted to dump the soup down his throat to keep him from losing any more weight, he couldn't pretend this wasn't a form of addiction too. Forcing an addict to detox almost always led to an explosive relapse. If Josh forced Tyler to eat more than he felt safe eating, he'd find a way to cancel out what he'd eaten, and it wouldn't be a good way.

"Just as much as you can with a minimum of ten bites. Does that sound doable?" Josh asked, opening the microwave when it beeped and taking the soup out.

Tyler nodded stiffly. "Yep," he replied, not looking very certain at all.

Josh grabbed a spoon out of the drawer by the stove as he said, "And if you get overwhelmed before then, just tell me, and we'll figure it out, okay? Don't push yourself harder than you can take, okay?"

Tyler relaxed only slight as he nodded this time, moving his stuff out of the way and letting Josh climb into his lap. He was still looking at the soup like it was going to jump out of the bowl and attack him, but he let Josh get settled on top of him anyway. He looked confused when Josh leaned over to set the bowl of soup on the floor instead of feeding him straight away.

A supportive smile tugged at Josh's lips as he took Tyler's face in his hands and pressed their foreheads together so Tyler would meet his eyes. His thumbs gently stroked Tyler's cheeks.

"I love you," Josh told him gently, nuzzling his nose against Tyler's to make him smile. It worked.

"I love you too," Tyler replied quietly, blushing when Josh's arms wrapped around his neck. "This is a dumb thing to freak out about, isn't it?" Tyler asked, looking embarrassed.

Josh shook his head easily, pressing a kiss to Tyler's nose. "It's not dumb at all," Josh reassured him. "Your brain's trying to protect you by telling you food is a threat because it knows you've had problems like this before. It might think this is the only way to protect you when you lose people you love, and that's not your fault, and it's not dumb. Your brain isn't giving you the right information, but that's not your fault. This is a legitimate source of anxiety for you, so no. I don't think it's dumb. I just think it's something we can work on."

"Is that something they told you in NA?" Tyler asked curiously.

Josh smiled slightly. "Yeah, but it still applies. So, here's my plan. I'm gonna kiss you a little with my gross smoker breath, and then I'm gonna feed you a couple bites to get that taste out of your mouth. Then, I'll kiss you again, and then I'll help you out by giving you some more bites. Then, I'll rub your back and let you do homework until it's time for me to go pick up Abbie and Jordan. Then, when I come home, I'll kiss you some more. Cool?"

Tyler looked much less overwhelmed now that he knew the full plan. He was still tense, but he nodded anyway and let Josh pick the bowl back up.

"Tell me if it's too much, okay?" Josh told him softly.

Once again, Tyler nodded stiffly. He relaxed slightly when Josh's hand slid into his hair, drawing him into a slow, gentle kiss. Tyler melted, tracing Josh's bottom lip with the tip of his tongue until Josh let him in. The kiss remained slow and gentle despite how anxious Tyler had to be feeling. He whimpered when Josh broke the kiss after a couple minutes.

"We're gonna try for five bites to start. If that's too much, and you need a break, just let me know. I'm not going to force you into this, okay? I just want to take care of you," Josh told Tyler carefully. "And no matter what, I'm still gonna love you so much."

Tyler nodded, watching tensely as Josh filled the spoon up about halfway with chicken noodle soup. When the spoon was brought to Tyler's lips, he opened them and allowed Josh to feed him the first spoonful. Josh smiled proudly at Tyler, waiting for him to swallow before leaning forward to kiss his lips softly.

"That was great, baby," Josh encouraged softly, pressing a couple more short kisses to Tyler's soft lips.

"Thanks," Tyler breathed out timidly, smiling slightly when Josh pressed kisses all over his face.

"Next bite. You ready?" Josh asked as he filled the spoon up with roughly the same amount of soup as before.

Tyler only made a small noise in response, but he still swallowed what was given to him. Once again, Josh smothered him in kisses to comfort and congratulate him. They continued this process until Tyler had eaten six of the ten bites, which was when he told Josh his stomach hurt and he couldn't eat anymore. Josh didn't push it, setting the bowl down on the ground again and wrapping his arms around Tyler's neck as he kissed him over and over again until he could feel Tyler smiling against his lips.

"I'm so proud of you, baby boy! You did so good. You should be so proud of yourself," Josh cooed, still pressing kisses to Tyler's skin between words. "I love you so much. I'm so fucking proud of you."

"I pussied out," Tyler grumbled, sounding frustrated with himself.

Josh shook his head, pulling back to look Tyler in the eye. "Ty, you weren't going to eat at all, but you were brave enough to do something good for your body and your health even though you were afraid. It's okay if you didn't get all ten bites today. You still deserve to be proud of yourself."

The other man searched Josh's eyes for a moment before sighing and resting his forehead against Josh's shoulder. "Thanks," he replied quietly.

Josh hugged Tyler close, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. "You don't have to thank me when you're the one doing all the work right now."

Tyler took in a deep breath before letting it out, keeping his face tucked away against Josh's shoulder. His arms were wrapped firmly around Josh's waist, keeping him close. A soft kiss was pressed to Josh's shoulder, making him smile slightly.

"Want me to rub your back while you work on your homework some more?" Josh offered, combing his fingers through Tyler's hair as he spoke.

"Yeah, but you still have to be naked," Tyler mumbled, making Josh laugh.

"Yes, sir," he agreed obediently, releasing Tyler in favour of crawling around to sit behind him. "Better?" He asked as he started to massage the newfound stiffness in Tyler's shoulders.

Tyler hummed appreciatively, pulling his homework in front of himself again as he started on another calculus equation. His hands shook a little bit, but he slowly relaxed as Josh continued to give him his undivided attention. Josh occasionally pressed kisses to Tyler's shoulders or pointed out how smart and amazing he was, but he mostly just tried not to be a distraction as Tyler worked his way through all of the assigned equations. By the time he had to get dressed to go pick up his siblings, there was no more stiffness left to rub out of Tyler's muscles, and Tyler was too focused on his homework to be overwhelmed for a little while.

They could get through this. Tyler was strong, smart, capable, and brave. Even if it meant eating just a few bites of every meal for a little while, he could get past this, and Josh would help however he could. Josh was going to force himself to delegate too. He couldn't solve Tyler's problems for him while trying to maintain his sobriety. They had to keep their promises to get help from outside sources too, and Josh was going to make sure he didn't fuck that up. He would keep going to NA multiple times a week, he would keep encouraging Tyler to talk to his parents and hopefully a doctor about what he was struggling with, and he would force himself to ask for help if this was too much for him. He was going to be responsible this time.