Twenty Eight.

In the forge, Hiccup was quiet and withdrawn, working deftly but stiffly. He was having difficulty processing everything that had happened: his violent and terrifying encounter with the Trapper on the ship, his discovery of the Dragon Arena and the games where dragons were killed for sport. He shivered recalling the anxiety as he freed the dragons and the sense of achievement he had garnered from letting them fly away. And the fear as they had been hunted and he had been caught. He stopped: he felt his stomach turn at the irony that the Trappers had caught and beaten him for supposedly attempting to rape Astrid when he was the one who had been brutally assaulted himself. He shuddered: he knew he could never harm anyone the way he had been so hurt.

Harald didn't comment on the bruises but the boy could tell his master was becoming suspicious. The girls hadn't brought any lunch and Hiccup felt his stomach ache with emptiness as well as with depression that his slips the previous day had made Harald suspect him as a danger to his daughters. His stomach rumbled: he hadn't eaten anything in the morning or the previous night and he was starting to feel sick with hunger but he forced himself to pound away at the hammer he was making, the clangs loud in the forge. Sweat dripped from his face and he had to pause, feeling dizzy. Suddenly, Harald grabbed his shoulder as he swayed and sat the boy down on a stool, his head between his knees.

"Take a break, Valkan," he said sternly as the boy resisted. Hiccup struggled desperately, feeling as if he was being pinned down. He was beginning to hyperventilate and he managed to push Harald's hands off him, sitting up and backing away.

"I-I'm good," he panted, his eyes wide with fear. "I just-just skipped breakfast." Harald stared at him and realised his decision to keep his daughters away from the unsettling apprentice had robbed him of his midday meal. He sighed, then turned to his own meal, packed by the girls before he had come to work and tore the bread in half, handing it to the trembling boy.

"Eat, lad," he said gruffly. "You look half-starved." Hiccup's cheeks flared with embarrassment and he warily accepted the food.

"Thanks," he managed and bit urgently into the bread. It was gritty and fairly tasteless but he was ravenous and it helped fill his aching stomach. Harald stared at him.

"You'd feel less dizzy if you took your tunic off, lad," he suggested, staring at the bright red and sweaty face. Hiccup looked alarmed.

"I-I'm good," he mumbled, chewing.

"You never even roll up your sleeves," Harald noted. Hiccup flinched.

"I...erm...get really self-conscious," he muttered unconvincingly. "I was teased all through my life for being the runt...And I don't feel the heat really..." Harald scowled: the boy was a poor liar.

"Valkan-what are you hiding?" he demanded. Hiccup hunched up and his green eyes widened in anxiety but then a voice sounded at the hatch. Hiccup's head snapped round in shock.

"Excuse me?" Harald gave the boy a 'this conversation isn't over' look that he had seen all too often from his father and turned to the customer: a beautiful young woman with sun-bright golden hair braided tightly, stunning azure eyes and a stern Viking expression. The smith came forward with a smile.

"Can I help?" he asked and she nodded.

"I am looking for someone," she admitted. "A boy my age. So high..." and she indicated Hiccup's height, "with dark red hair, green eyes, freckles, one leg and looking a bit the worse for wear." Harald frowned.

"Why are you looking for him?" he asked. She sighed.

"I'm worried for him," she admitted. "He's my friend and he ran away. He'd been badly treated and he left me behind..." Harald stared at her.

"You're the girl with the eyes," he said. "The one he bought the beads for!" She blinked and stared at him as if he had gone mad.

"Um...have you seen him?" she asked directly. "This is the fourth forge I've tried in the town and I'm not sure where else I can try..." Harald nodded and beckoned her forward, leading her to the back where Hiccup was sitting warily, his eyes resigned.

"Hi, Astrid," he said heavily. "Why are you here?" She folded her arms.

"Let me think..." she said sharply, "looking for my best friend? You went off without any breakfast and you look dreadful..." He sighed.

"You know what I want," he said tonelessly.

"Never gonna happen," she shot back. "Hiccup, I'm not leaving you." Harald stared at him.

"Valkan? Why is she calling you 'Hiccup'?" he asked suspiciously. Astrid started at the unfamiliar name and quickly picked up on Hiccup's deception. She forced herself to sigh as if in embarrassment.

"It's his childhood nickname," she explained. "He doesn't really like it but I've always used it. I've never really used his given name." Hiccup shrugged, staring at the floor in concern. Harald was already suspicious of his story and Astrid's arrival added further inconsistencies. She stared at Hiccup and frowned. "Beads?" He blushed scarlet.

"Forget it," he said in a low voice. "I was temporarily insane in imagining I could send you a gift as an apology. I wasn't expecting you to find me and hit me." The last two words were biting. She leaned closer, forcing herself to remain calm. He was lashing out because he was scared and hurt and she knew she hadn't helped but she wanted to help now. She needed him to realise she couldn't be pushed away just because he believed he was worthless.

"I've fed Tooth and Stormy," she murmured gently. "I guess I need work as well if I am to feed myself. My girl's too tired to head home straight away..." He sighed and swallowed. He was still furiously inspecting the floor.

"I can barely make enough to feed Toothless and I," he whispered back. His voice was hopeless now. "I'm just not good enough to take care of you as well..." He sighed. "I'm sorry, Astrid..."

oh Astrid, I'm so sorry...I couldn't stop him, I let you down...you deserve so much better that this...I'm so sorry...

"I heard last night," she told him gently. "No one else is good enough for me. I want and deserve the boy I love: I want you. No one else. You never let me down: you never did anything wrong. And you are mine. I'm not letting you go! I didn't give up when he had you and I'm not giving up now. Not even when you ran off and made me chase you for two weeks!" She carefully took his hand and he didn't pull away, to Harald's surprise. Slowly, his ashamed green eyes flicked up.

"You won't get a peaceful night's sleep with me," he warned her quietly.

"I've spent most of my life not getting a peaceful night's sleep, what with all those raids," she reminded him. "You are worth it. Don't put yourself down. We'll get through this together-no matter how long it takes..." She leaned forward and gently stared into his eyes. He bowed his head.

"You should go home," he repeated. "Your family will miss you." She gave a slight smile.

"My father didn't want me to come," she murmured. "He doesn't want me to have anything to do with you now. But I'm not going back. I'm not leaving you now I've found you." He abruptly put both hands on her shoulders and stared deep into her eyes.

"Not for me," he murmured. "Go back before it's too late, Astrid. You don't want this." She leaned her head against his and sighed.

"I want you, Hiccup," she murmured. "And I will do whatever I need to keep you and help you recover." He said nothing, just leaning against her for a long moment.

"You should see Gothi. I'm sure she has something to cure insanity," he grumbled mildly and she felt a weight lift off her chest: he had forgiven her. She pulled back, then kissed him quickly on the cheek.

"Don't wanna be cured," she smiled. "And that's for...being you." He looked up.

"No punch?" he asked her warily.

"I think you've got enough credit from last night for a bit longer," she murmured and though he stiffened slightly, he then gave a small nod. "Just-no more running!" He slowly got to his feet.

"I gotta work," he reminded her and then she handed him the rough parcel she had brought. He inspected it and found a lightly roasted fish. He stared at her. "Wh-what?"

"Lunch?" she suggested and shrugged. "But don't expect this to be a regular thing!" she added shortly. Astrid Hofferson doesn't do cooking! He stared again and then smiled.

"Um, thanks?" he said uncertainly. Then he looked to Harald and offered the fish. "Do you...?" he asked but the man gave him a wink.

"I'm not going to steal part of the lunch your girlfriend has brought for you, Valkan," he said and gave a grin. "Don't take too long!" He darted to the front of the forge and left them alone. Hiccup cautiously broke a piece of roasted fish off and took a wary bite: Astrid was an excellent warrior but an appalling cook. In fact, his stomach still lurched at the memory of her yak nog. She stared at him and sighed.

"I really am sorry," she said gently. He chewed: it was dry but not too bad, considering.

"So am I," he sighed. "It's not that I didn't want you here with me, because I really really did, but I feared that you would end up shamed as I am shamed because of running away with me." He sighed again. "I really don't know who I am anymore."

"Well, Valkan, I think you are who you always were," she said thoughtfully. and took his hand again "What happens to you hasn't changed who you are inside. It just changes the names people call you-unfairly-and what you believe you are." She stared into his eyes. "I know that under those bruises and scars, the same stubborn, shy, clumsy, brilliant, brave boy is hiding. I know he's scared and wounded and totally lacking in confidence but I also know what you did yesterday was stupidly brave and risky and that's the Hiccup I know!"

He ghosted the faintest hint of a smile and his grip in her hand tightened. "Yeah-he's a complete idiot!" he muttered and she smiled as he took another bite of his fish. The thought meant a lot to him and he was willing to hazard her cooking if it made her happy. Finally, she rose to her feet from the crouch she had settled in.

"Do you know if there is any work around for me?" she murmured. He sighed.

"I'm not sure," he sighed. "I only looked at forges, to be honest. I am sure there is something you can do but I don't know what..." Please not a cook. Or a seamstress. Oh Thor...

"VALKAN!" Harald called, poking his head into the back room. There were a couple of townsmen, excitedly chattering to him about some item of news. "Have you heard? Someone has stolen the dragons from the Arena!" Hiccup started and his eyes widened. Had he been seen?

"Who...how...?" he asked, acting shocked.

"The guard saw a shadowy figure in a cloak flying away in a black dragon!" the smith scoffed. "Too many meads on duty, I think!" Hiccup stole a worried look at Astrid but she was staring at the men in concern.

"Are you okay?" she whispered. He gave a small nod.

"Fortunately, it was foggy and all they saw was a shape in a cloak with a scarf over his face," he murmured.

"Fortunately, the Trappers had more in their hold so the games can still go ahead-you haven't forgotten I promised to take you?" Hiccup shook his head dazedly, his stomach clutching in horror. "Maybe your Astrid can come with my girls and we can make an outing of it!" Hiccup had paled and he looked up at Astrid but her expression was very neutral.

"I would be honoured, sir," she said respectfully, though he could feel her grip tightening ferociously. "I'll see you later, Valkan. I'll be back at sunset?" He nodded, in a daze as she walked confidently off into the teeming streets. But he felt hollow, empty. He had achieved nothing. Dragons would still be killed here for sport, the trappers would continue their horrific trade and he had got Toothless injured!

"She's an impressive girl," Harald said, still fiddling with the sword he was repairing. "I can see why you wanted to remember her." Hiccup nodded.

"I have loved her since I was about five," he murmured softly. "She was the only girl I ever imagined...anything with." He stared in the direction she had headed and sighed. "But she is too good for me now." And he reached over to grab the hammer he was working on as Harald turned back to inspect the boy, his interested piqued by the despondent tone. Hiccup's sleeve caught and Harald started as the material was dragged up the skinny limb to the elbow.

"What's that?" he snapped, grabbing Hiccup's wrist. The boy stiffened, afraid of being touched and worse as the man shoved the sleeve up beyond his elbow and peered at the runes sliced deep into his white skin, the scars still dark red and newly healed.

The word SLAVE was carved into his arm. He swallowed and felt himself begin to tremble.

"Someone's idea of a joke," he said quietly, trying to pull his arm free, but Harald tightened his grip painfully on the wrist and jerked the boy forward. "Please, Harald-it means nothing..."

"I knew there was something off with you!" he snarled and grabbed Hiccup's tunic, pulling it up to his neck. The boy struggled desperately as the men still standing to be served at the hatch gasped at his whip scars but Harald didn't hear them as he stared in shock at the horrific brand in the boy's shoulder-fresh and red enough to scream escaped slave. The boy was shaking his head desperately.

"It's not what you think," he begged, trying to squirm away. "Please-I was freed by Stoick the Vast of Berk..." He gulped. "I am a free man!"

"This is a Berserker brand," Harald said with scorn. "You are an escaped slave." Hiccup shook his head wildly. He felt tears of fear prick his eyes.

"No!" he begged. "Please-let me go!"

But Harald's only answer was a heavy blow to the back of the head that dumped him to the floor, unconscious.