"Good, that's 15 minutes I can sit here and hold you."

•°•♡•°•

She snuggled into my lap, her arms wrapping around my neck and her cheek resting against my forehead.

It suddenly hit me how much I loved this woman, and my eyes filled with tears. How was I going to fit a lifetime of love into 5 months? How was I going to create enough memories to get me through the rest of my life.

My arms involuntarily tightened around her, my nose nuzzling her cheek, and she turned her head, her lips finding mine. We kissed, small, sweet, soft kisses, her lips pecking mine lightly, from one corner to the other. She grabbed my bottom lip between hers, her nose brushing mine. My hand moved to her belly, flattening against it, and her arms tightened around my neck, her lips pressing to mine eagerly.

Our lips parted, our tongues coming together, our kiss intensifying. We kissed passionately, getting lost in each other, both of us jumping when we heard the horn of the taxi beeping outside.

She smiled at me, sliding off my lap and grabbing her coat. I stood and took it from her, helping her into it and zipping it up. I grabbed her scarf from the hook and wrapped it around her neck, taking her hand in mine and leading her out the door.

Once in the taxi, she told the driver where to go. We rode silently, her hand in mine, my thumb rubbing across the back mindlessly. I stared out the window, not really seeing anything, my mind overwhelmed with thoughts I couldn't make any sense of.

Some time later, we pulled up in front of the doctors office, climbing out of the taxi, and I handed the driver some money, telling him to keep the change.

Soo Ah grabbed my hand again, and we walked into the building, me following behind nervously. I wasn't sure what this doctors visit would entail, but I was new to all of it, so it was kind of irrelevant.

I never thought I would be doing something like this, going to the doctor with...I smiled to myself...she was my fiancee. I was at the doctor with my fiancee, about to find out whatever there was to find out about our baby.

Soon enough we stepped into a waiting room, and Soo Ah went to the receptionist desk, signing in, then returning to me and leading me to a chair. I sat next to her, seeing two other women in other chairs, both with large, pregnant bellies.

I sucked my lips between my teeth and looked at the floor. This felt odd.

One of the other ladies was called back, and Soo Ah watched her, hands clasped together in her lap. She glanced at me.

"You look nervous."

I nodded, swallowing thickly.

"I am. I've never been in a place like this before."

She smiled.

"Well don't be. Dr. Han is really nice. She'll be surprised to meet you, I'm sure, and probably even more surprised that everything will be changing where the baby is concerned, but I think she'll be happy that I no longer wish to put him up for adoption."

"Him?" I asked, my brow going up.

She shrugged. "It doesn't feel right to refer to the baby as 'it', so I just started saying him, to make it easier."

"Soo Ah, you can come back now."

The nurse called her name, and she got up, grabbing my hand and pulling me along with her.

"I see you've brought someone with you." The nurse said conversationally.

"Yes, this is my...uh...fiance, Taehyung."

"Oh, wonderful. Here we are," she had opened a door to an exam room, stepping aside to allow us to enter first. "Soo Ah, you can have a seat on the table there, and Taehyung, you can sit in that chair right there."

I sat, watching Soo Ah step up and sit on the table. The nurse took her blood pressure, and her tempurature, then grabbed a clipboard and a pen.

"Any changes in how you feel, or anything you want to tell me about?"

She shook her head. "No, I've felt fine, the morning sickness is gone, and other than being tired a little more often, everything is good."

"Okay, well then you can just relax there for a few minutes, and Dr. Han will be right in to talk to you."

"Thank you."

"Sure thing. It was nice to meet you Taehyung."

I nodded at her and she left the room. I looked at Soo Ah, and she smiled.

"So, the time before last when I was here, I had an ultrasound, that's where the doctor looks at the baby, and can see that everything is okay physically."

My eyes widened a bit, and I nodded in acknowledgement.

"I had the opportunity to find out if the baby was a boy or a girl. But I didn't want to know, because I was afraid if I knew, I would be trying to decide on a name, and picturing a little you, or a little me, and I would start getting attached, which I didn't want to do."

I watched her face, seeing the pain flash through her eyes quickly.

"But if you want to know, that's fine. I'm okay with it, because I realize you may want to be prepared, ya know, maybe start fixing up a room or something."

I shook my head.

"I don't want to know. I'll know when he or she is born."

She nodded. "Okay. But if you change your mind, don't hesitate to tell me."

"I won't change my mind. I'd rather be surprised. We can still work on turning the extra bedroom into a babies room, we'll just use neutral colors for now, and we can accessorize later on."

She smiled, then her head turned towards the door at the small knock.

"Come in."

The door opened, and an attractive older lady walked in, giving Soo Ah a smile. She suddenly noticed me, and a small 'oh' left her lips.

"Dr. Han, I'd like you to meet my fiance, Kim Taehyung."

Her brows went up, her gaze going from me, to Soo Ah, then back to me, a smile finally curving her lips up. She came towards me, extending her hand and bowing slightly.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Taehyung. I'm Dr. Han. I've been taking care of Soo Ah, and I'll be delivering the baby when the time comes."

"Nice to meet you, Dr. Han."

She released my hand, and turned to Soo Ah.

"So, is there anything you'd like to tell me? Anything I should know?"

"Well, I've...we've, decided that we aren't going to put our baby up for adoption. Taehyung is going to raise our child."

I glanced up at Soo Ah, and her eyes were filled with tears. I inhaled, my heart twisting in my chest.

Dr Han turned, standing so that she could see both of us.

"I'm very happy to hear that."

She looked at me, giving me a kind smile.

"Well, we are doing another ultra sound today, so that'll be an experience for you, right Taehyung?"

I nodded, feeling a bit apprehensive.

"There's nothing to worry about. It just lets me see the baby, measure and make sure the growth is happening at the rate it should be, and we get to hear the heartbeat, which is always exciting."

She moved to the corner of the room, pulling a cart with a screen and keyboard, and some other odd looking parts out and to the side of the exam table.

Soo Ah had already slid her leggings down below her belly and pulled her shirt up, laying back, and the doctor grabbed a blue drape, and tucked it into the waist band of her pants to fall over her legs. She picked up something attached with a wire that resembled an electric razor, but the end was curved, then she grabbed a bottle and squirted jelly looking stuff on Soo Ah's belly.

I swallowed nervously.

"You might want to come closer Taehyung, so you can watch the screen with Soo Ah. I'll tell you what I'm looking at as we go."

I chewed the inside of my bottom lip, my eyes meeting Soo Ah's. She smiled, and held her hand out to me. I got up, a bit hesitantly, and went to stand at her side, sliding my hand into hers. She squeezed mine slightly, and I gave her a smile. If she wasn't nervous, then maybe I shouldn't be.

Dr Han started moving the contraption she was holding around on Soo Ah's belly, and I glanced at the screen, hearing strange wooshing noises, but all I could see were black and gray blobs that seemed to be moving.

"Now are we still not interested in learning the babies gender?"

Soo Ah looked at me, questioning me with her eyes, but I still hadn't changed my mind. I shook my head.

"We don't want to know." Soo Ah said, and the doctor nodded.

"Okay, well we have a pretty good view of baby today. Soo Ah, you didn't want pictures before, would you like me to print some today?"

Soo Ah nodded, then smiled at me. "I would, I'm sure Taehyung will want to frame them."

I looked at her, and she squeezed my hand again, giving me a reassuring look.

"So Taehyung, I'm assuming you have never seen an ulstrasound before?"

I shook my head.

"Well it can be a bit confusing until you know what you're looking at, but there usually comes a point where everything becomes clear. Just watch the little white arrow on the screen, it'll be moving around, and I'll be explaining what everything is as we go."

I watched the screen, finding the arrow and watching as she moved it around, drawing white lines between two points and clicking her keyboard.

"What I'm doing now is taking measurements to see how baby is growing. Here we have an arm, and then below that is the babies head. We're looking at a profile, so right here is the little nose, and the mouth, and this is the ear."

I was starting to see it, after hearing her explain, and I stared at the screen, watching the movement, seeing the little arm come down and disappear from the screen.

"Baby is moving around a bit, that's good. Now right here, we have a leg, and there is the tiny foot."

She made more lines on the screen, clicking more buttons, but I could only stare, amazed that I was starting to be able to see the shape of a baby.

"Okay, now comes the fun part. See that little blip right there? This is the babies chest, and that," She moved the arrow to a spot on the screen next to the quickly moving flicker, "is the babies heart."

She had moved around on Soo Ah's belly with the thing she was holding, and suddenly I could hear what sounded like... galloping horses. It was fast, almost seeming to match the flickering spot. I stared in amazement, not sure how to feel.

"Babies hearts beat almost twice as fast as ours, so this is normal. Pretty cool, right?"

I nodded absentmindedly, my eyes never leaving the screen. I felt the hairs on my arms stand on end, goosebumps forming as I watched the little arm raise above the head, the spot the doctor said was the mouth seeming to open, then close again. The heartbeat quickened, if that was even possible, then slowed a tiny bit, and I could see the tiny fingers as a tiny hand opened.

It suddenly seemed a little hard to draw in a breath as the realization hit me. I was looking at a child. My child. A child that I had created with Soo Ah. A child that had a heartbeat. It was overwhelming. It was a miracle.

I watched the tiny fingers curl, the tiny hand becoming a fist, and I couldn't explain what I was feeling. There really were no words. My chest felt like someone had tightened a belt around it, and was pulling it tighter as each second passed, but at the same time, it felt like it would burst with love for the tiny life growing inside Soo Ah. I didn't realize that there were tears in my eyes, until I felt one roll down my cheek.

Suddenly the images on the screen changed, the wooshing sound getting louder and the galloping horses disappearing.

The doctor chuckled. "Well, I guess baby was tired of that position, and decided to move. I'm just going to see if I can get a few more measurements, and then I'd say we'll be done for today."

Soo Ah glanced at me, her smile falling when she realized I had silent tears running down my face.

"Taehyung..." she whispered, squeezing my hand lightly.

My eyes moved from the screen to her face, and her brows furrowed with concern as she looked into my eyes.

"Are you okay?" She asked quietly.

The doctor looked up, glancing at me, and smiling. "It's amazing that a tiny life starts out like this, and nine months later, a perfect little person you can hold and kiss and love comes into the world. Just knowing that this baby is a product of your love together makes it a bit overwhelming, doesn't it? It's okay to be emotional. This is the miracle of life, and everything about it is fascinating."