4:15 am

RaFiend:

Good morning :)

Gising na baka maiwan ng bus

I smiled upon reading his text first thing in the morning.

5:05 am

You:

Morning.

Aga gising o walang tulog?

We've been like this for a month after the KTV incident. Hinihintay na niya ako ulit tuwing uwian at sabay kaming umuuwi. He'd tell me ahead of time if something came up and he wouldn't be able to accompany me home. And on weekends, we texted almost the whole day, keeping each other updated on whatever the one's up to or just something trivial and random stuff to talk about. No, we're not a thing but we clearly aren't just friends too.

Binalikan ko ang mga luma naming convo at binasa iyon randomly hanggang sa mabalikan ko ang isang recent at medyo madibdibang usapan namin.

You:

Tawang tawa nga si Mon nung kinwento ko sa kaniya yon. Lukaret eh haha

Anyway, bakit ka nga ba nag-transfer dito?

If it's too personal then you don't have to answer

RaFiend:

Nah, it's fine

Handa ka tissue hahaha jk

My parents separated ways when I was in grade school. Told us their relationship didn't work. I ended up staying with my dad at manila and my sister stayed here with my mom. Then years later, mom eventually found what she's looking for with someone else. I'm not sure if this might sound weird but we still all communicate in the same way, especially my parents, despite having this complicated setup

But then my dad, thinking that I had ill feelings towards mom ended up sending me here to reconcile. Hindi ko alam sa'n niya nakuha 'yon. Pero pumayag nalang rin ako para matahimik na ang mga agam-agam niya

You:

You mean you're living with your mom and her new partner right now? How was it? Hindi ba awkward 'yon?

That sounds kinda complicated. Totoo bang wala ka ni tampo sa mom mo? Baka naman sinasabi mo lang na ok sayo because that's what they expect of you?

RaFiend:

Yep. Awkward nung una pero nakasanayan ko na rin

To be honest, I can't help thinking why things doesn't work out with her and dad at first. Hindi ko maintindihan kung paano nila naisipang magpakasal kung hindi rin pala magw-work yon in the long run. But at a certain point, it started to get to me. And it made me realize that tomorrow, same goes with everything, is never promised. Because eventually, it'll change. Gasgas nang pakinggan pero, lahat talaga ng bagay ay nagbabago. At some point

And yes, staying here with mom for more than a year, naintindihan ko na 'yon ngayon. At tama si dad, hindi totoong wala akong hinanakit sa mom ko. Because whether I like it or not, I used to carry that ill feeling towards her for years. Unconsciously

Pasintabi sa mga hinanaing hahaha

You:

Sabi nga nila, change is a constant thing

It just sucks to have it proven in such a cruel way don't you think?

RaFiend:

Some things we only learn thru pain and suffering

You:

That's some deep shit I can't swim hahaha

RaFiend:

Hahahaha

Just so you know, I used to compete in swimming way back in jhs

Ano, turuan na ba kita?

You:

Now that's some shit I ain't willing to sign up for

Balakadyan. Bye

Hahahaha

RaFiend:

Hahaha

Are we still talking about suffering and pain or swimming or you rejecting my offer? hahaha

You:

Hahaha shit if I know

RaFiend:

Send help

You:

How you feelin' right now about all of it though?

RaFiend:

Ayos lang, tingin ko

My parents aren't perfect but I can say that I'm completely fine with it now

And holy shit—I just realize that I haven't told anyone this before...

You:

Anong ibig mong sabihin? Na pag kumalat yan ako ang sole suspect?

Kakabahan na ba ko?

RaFiend:

Hahaha oo

You:

Thank you for being honest with me about it

RaFiend:

Salamat sa pakikinig... o pagbasa ba dapat kasi tinype ko lang? Hahaha

You:

Dumbass hahaha it's whatever the hell you prefer

RaFiend:

Hahaha okay edi salamat sa pagmamahal hahaha ikaw LhuNgz szaPhAt nHah

Maubusan yata ako ng hininga sa dami ng h hahaha bhoszz RhaF mapagmahulz

You:

Mukha ka lang talagang matino no?

RaFiend:

Hahahaha

Pero seryoso, alam mo, I've been thinking... that I can't thank my father enough for convincing me to go here. For reconciling with my mom. And for having the chance to meet you. :)

Nakangiti ako nang tuluyang bumangon para mag-shower at gumayak. I've done packing and double checking my things since last night. Pagkaligo ay nag-blower lang ako ng buhok, naglagay ng moisturizer, sunscreen, lip balm at tint. I looked at the reflection of my hazel eyes on the mirror for some time. Isang ngiti matapos suklayin ng mga daliri ang mahabang buhok ay 'tsaka lamang ako nakuntento. It was around five thirty when I finished and finally ready to go.

"Everything ready, Lewy?" mom asked for what seemed like the tenth time. Magmula nang makababa ako at hanggang ngayong nasa garahian na kami at paalis.

"Yes, Mom." I glanced at her and rolled my eyes facetiously.

"'Yung meds na hinanda ko nadala mo ba? Uminom ka kaya muna ng Bonamine at baka mahilo ka sa byahe? Are you sure you brought everything you need—"

"Mom." Natatawa kong sinipat ang pagkakataranta niya. "Okay na po lahat. It's just a three days retreat. I'll be back in one piece. Safe and sound. At syempre maganda pa rin."

She laughed at my last remark and finally calmed down.

"Your daughter's a big responsible girl, I know she can manage a couple of days without us, honey." Dad winked at me before embracing Mom's shoulder from behind. "Tingin ko mas dapat kang mabahala sa mga tao sa paligid niya, imbes na sa anak natin."

I blinked, feigning innocence with my dad's remark. While Mom sure isn't happy with what she heard. Nagkatinginan kami ni Dad nang makinita na ang mangyayari.

"Why would you say that to her? Our daughter's too chaste—"

Dad and I both snorted and ended up laughing hard, leaving Mom dumbfounded with disbelief.

"Sabi ko na hindi ka dapat nagsasasama rito sa Daddy mo. What mischief has he been teaching you?!" Mom scolded me but she was throwing sharp looks at Dad.

Growing up, they've always been protective of me. Siguro dahil only child ako o ganoon na lang talaga nila ako kamahal. Either way is fine with me since they let me do everything I wanted. Especially my dad. He often let me off the hook with everything. Kahit anong kalokohan o kapritso ko'y pinapalagpas at sinusuportahan niya, na karamihan ay hindi alam ni Mommy. O kung alam man niya'y hindi na nakararating sa akin ang galit niya dahil sinasapo nang lahat ni Dad. He's always been my saviour, my hero. And I love them both the same.

Hinatid ako ni Dad sa school kung saan ang meeting place para sa bus assignment at boarding. It was six in the morning and the sun's just about to rise from the field's view. Sinuot ko ang dalang backpack at naghanda na sa pagbaba ng sasakyan.

"Bye, Dad. Try not to miss me too much while I'm gone, okay?"

He chuckled as I kissed his cheek.

"Love you, Dad!" dungaw ko sa bintana pagkababa sa sasakyan.

Dad smiled tenderly at me. "Love you too, anak. Call us when you can. And remember to fool around moderately, okay?"

Pagkatapos tumango ay ngumiti ako sa kaniya sa huling pagkakataon bago tuluyang pumasok sa school. The busses are already lined up as some of the students tried to find their bus assignments. Ang ilang lamp post ay nakabukas pa sa kabila ng pasikat nang araw. Lumapit ako sa mga bus upang hanapin na rin ang assigned bus ng section namin. Binabasa ko na ang detalye sa karatula ng isang bus ng may biglang humigit sa braso ko. Sa gulat ay hindi ako agad nakareklamo.

"Lew! You have to hear this!" It was Mon, too energetic for the sun yet to rise.

"I'll sure hear it without you shouting it at me."

"Naalala mo anong grade kasama natin last retreat?" aniya sa malakas at nasasabik pa ring tono.

Lito man sa kung anong ikinatutuwa ng kaibigan ay sinagot ko pa rin ang tanong niya. "The juniors? Grade nine and ten? Isn't it always like that?"

"Isn't it? But, Lew, guess what?!" Naunahan pa nang maliliit na talon at tili ang dapat niyang sasabihin.

"What?" Bahagya nang kumunot ang noo ko, natatawa.

"Morning, girls!" It was the deep and gentle voice that told me what Mon's fuss was about.

"Morning, Vice Pres!" Mon beamed at him while throwing me a knowing look as usual.

"I can see your enthusiasm for the trip but we'll be leaving soon so if you may, please settle on your assigned bus at once," pormal nitong sabi kahit halata sa boses ang pagngisi.

"Ay noted po!"

Napailing na lamang ako sa katuwaan ng kaibigan bago binalingan ang dumating. Rafiele's lenient eyes welcomed the amusement in mine. I raised a brow as I tried so suppress a smile I'm failing to hide. He tilted his head a little to the side and gave out his usual contagious smile. Mas lalo ko tuloy hindi napigilan ang ngiti dahil sa nawala niyang mga mata. He always looks like an innocent jovial kid whenever he smiles. I just can't get enough of the cuteness of it, despite seeing it almost everyday for more than a month now.

"The Student Council has decided to make a little change with the grades scheduled arrangement especially for this year so..." he explained with the same formal voice just to fill the silence between us.

"Oh, you don't say," nasa kalagitnaan ng hindi paniniwala at mangha kong utas.

He just nodded then shrug lazily. Ngumungusong bahagya para lang pigilin ang ngiting animong nakapinta na sa mukha.

Tinignan ko siyang mabuti at kalaunan ay ginaya ko ang pormal niyang boses pagkasabing, "There isn't any form of bribery or worst... coercion involved, is there, Mister Vice President?"

"Of course..." Bahagya siyang natawa bago yumuko at napakamot sa dulo ng kilay. "Of course there is. Pero secret lang natin, 'wag kayong maingay."

Namilog ang mga mata ko, natatawa. "Did you bribe the other Student Council members just to—"

"Lew!" natatawa niyang putol nang mabilis humakbang palapit sa akin. Muntik pang takpan ang bibig ko kung nagdire-diretso ako sa sinasabi. Sabay bulong, "I just told you to keep quiet about it."

Mas lalo ko siyang pinandilatan sabay pabirong sinapak sa dibdib. "Rafiele, you dumbass. Seryoso ka ba? Why did you do that?"

Imbes na sagutin ako'y tumawa lang siya at napailing.

"Pasado ka nang bad boy, Raf," si Mon na nakuha pang makipag-high five sa huli bago nakisabay sa pagtawa nito.

Parang ayaw ko pang maniwala ngunit wala na akong nagawa kundi ang matawa na lang nang marahan.

He ended up tagging along with us until Mon and I found our section's designated bus.

"Text me if you get bored."

Sinalubong niya ako ng ngiti nang lingunin ko. Tumango ako at bahagya siyang kinawayan bago ako tuluyang sumakay ng bus matapos.