I retired my position ages ago. Now I'm just a Cybertronian-Human Minor with a prestige title I don't want anymore, but I can't bring myself to resign it because I feel like I would dishonor him.

I don't think all the support on Cyberton could help me cope or bring me to make a decision.

I told Drift I was going for a walk for a while, to clear my head; that he shouldn't wait up for me. But I don't think he would heed any attention to the last part. He worries about me too much.

Of course, my friends do, too. They just don't understand.

And today, it's harder than it usually is.

I woke up this morning with the hard urge of digging a hole and never coming out of it.

A grim thought for a birthday girl's morning, I know, but it's hard to keep myself together, especially today: my 14 Billionth birthday.

See, for the past century, I've been coming to this same spot, talking to the same statue, Daddy's statue, every week. It doesn't have the same bright colors like he did, but... It helps.

I know I came yesterday, but this morning my cherry blossom tree bloomed on a few branches this morning; 22 branches to be exact. I grabbed 5 of them before I left the garage this morning.

So here I am, sitting on the wall of the bridge that crosses over the pond that the 8 Primes' statues surround in front the Optimus Prime statue.

I just talk to it. I talk about what happens in Cybertron, what goes on at home, how the team is, stuff that he would find comfort in knowing about.

It sometimes hurts to be here and talk.

But why does today, of all the days, hurt so much?

"I honestly didn't think I would come today," I say softly, fiddling with a bloomed cherry blossom in my serv-- Er, hands. "I just... Sometimes I expect you to move, or to just wink at me like you used to do at times."

I look up the best I can; just like every other one, his statue was completely still.

"You would probably lecture me about wearing the pendant. There's just too much memory with it." I felt tears sting my opt-- Eyes. The a few petals snap off of the branch; I just let them fall and float off on the surface of the water. "Can you even hear me talk?"

I doubt it. I'm basically just talking to myself like a crazy person.

Of course he can't hear you, Ryanna! He's dead for Gods sake!

"I guess... Not. Well... I'll be back next week." I wipe the tears from my eye, pull the petals off the branches (sparing one branch), toss them all into the pond and shove the sticks in my bag, getting up and starting my way towards the history museum. Not that the memories will make it any better, but I don't really want to go home.

"Welcome to the Cyberton History Museum. Do you need a map?"

"No thanks." I walk past the not-so welcoming Welcome Desk and down the halls with the history of the Primes. There's a tribute down the North corridor that has a tribute to all 8 of the Primes, the last one being my father's. I go there every week.

I go up to the Tribute Alter and stare at the pictures of my father. I stare the longest at the one of just me and him. I feel the tears come back, one managing to escape.

It hurts to be here, but I still come for reasons I don't know of.

I carefully lay the last branch on the altar, and start to walk off, with tears now streaming down my face.

Almost as soon as I walk out the door, there was a huge crash and a ton of dust, giving me a minor asthma attack. I grab my inhaler and take a whiff of it.

When the dust finally disappeared, I wanted to cry at what I saw.

The bridge was crushed under the Optimus Prime statue, now in a million pieces.

I ran up to the edge of the bridge, next to Bumblebee. We both gape at the shattered stone that once resembled my father.

So... Yeah... Yesterday was Ryanna's birthday... (May 17th). Yeah... Let's just say I wanted to hit Sideswipe for using the words "Optimus Prime" and "Dead" in the same sentence. If "not" came before "dead" it'd be a different story...

Meh.

WISH RYANNA STARLIGHT PRIME A HAPPY 14 BILLIONTH BIRTHDAY