Sonicbronyuniversez: Hey dudes and chicks, Sonicbronyuniversez here, and I decided to do this ten words or less review thing that I saw a bunch of youtubers doing after some disney dude did it. This is where I review either all the episodes in a season of a show, a bunch of movies, or just something random. For starters, let's talk Lion Guard. Now this series has mixed reception, with some people loving it, and some people hating it. Well it's pretty clear I'm in the former, as this exists. Until the Ducktales reboot came along, this was my favorite Disney show currently airing. It's still not quite as good as Gravity falls in my opinion, but it's certainly in my top three disney shows. And as much as I like Lily Orchard the Youtuber, who inspired me to do this when he reviewed all the Mlp episodes, I'm gonna have a lot of fun joking about he, and plenty of other Youtubers. Anyway, this is every lion guard episode of seaosn one reviewed in ten words or less.

The Lion Guard: Return of the Roar

Rating: 6/10

Words: Bunga rips ass, part one.

Never judge a hyena bit it's spots

Rating: 10/10

Words: Will Kion and Jasiri just fuck already?

The Rise of Makuu

Rating: 6/10

Words: good episode, but Makuu's a pretty boring character.

Bunga the wise

Rating: 5/10.

Words: Bunga rips ass, part two.

Can't wait to be Queen

Rating: 2/10

Words: Kion's role doensn't excuse brushing off his fucking concern!

Eye of the beholder

Rating: 9/10

Words: This episode shows why Ono's role is important.

The Kupatana Celebration

Rating: 4/10

Words: If Dogo's potential wasn't wasted, this would've been incredible.

Fuli's new family

Rating: 6/10

Words: This episode would've been better if we saw Fuli's parents.

The search for Utamu

Rating: 7/10

Words: Bunga uses crap bugs to find food, and it's great.

Follow that hippo

Rating: 7/10

Words: Mtoto...you are SO lucky you're adorable.

The call of the Drongo

Rating: 8/10

Words: Tamaa is just so charasmatic that I don't care.

Paintings and Predictions

Rating: 6/10

Words: Somewhat forced ending, but I still like this episode.

The Mbali Fields Migration

Rating: 9/10

Words: Finally! Bitching about the one helping that doesn't feel pointless!

Bunga and the King

Rating: 7/10

Words: Simba throws a fit over Bunga's sarcasm, and it's great.

The imaginary okapi

Rating: 5/10

Words: Just because Ajabu's different doesn't mean he's interesting.

Too many termites

Rating: 8/10

Words: How did they fuck up Simba in The Savannah Summit.

The trouble with galalos

Rating: 6/10

Words: Badili's kinda boring, but at least he becomes somewhat boss.

Janja's new crew

Rating: 4/10

Words: It's especially pointless since Janja eventually takes these douchebags back.

Baboons

Rating: 7/10

Words: These two acted how they should've in Kiara's FIRST episode.

Beware the Zimwi

Rating: 6/10

Words: A good halloween special, and nothing more.

Lions of the Out lands

Rating: 9/10

Words: This episode is almost 100% fan service, and it's great.

Never roar again

Rating: 10/10

Words: Enough hate dudes. KION. ISN'T. A. GARY. STU.

The lost gorillas

Rating: 3/10

Words: Bunga rips ass, part three. This episode sucks.

The trail to Udugu

Rating: 9/10

Words: We finally got proper Kion and Kiara bonding. Worth it!

Ono's idol

Rating: 8/10

Words: This kinda reminds me of Patch's london adventure.

Beshte and the hippo lanes

Rating: 1/10

Words: Why was Bupu a toddler at the worst, possible, time!?

Ono and the tickbird

Rating: 5/10

Words: Not my season finale, but hey. It wasn't a flop.

Sonicbronyuniversez: Okay, so now that we saw all of my ratings, I'll be giving my top five top and bottom episodes for season one. Keep in mind that I'll be doing this again when season two is over. And trust me, I have a lot of things to say about how I think they fucked up with Kion getting development from Scar coming back. Anyway, I'll be doing the bottom five first, because I want to end on a high note.

Bottom five

Number five: The Kupatana Celebration

Words: Now I know it's pretty stupid to dislike an episode over one little thing I hated, but let me make it clear. I don't hate this episode. I just hate that they wasted Dogo. If they had him reform like from what it looked like, that's what it was building up to, then he could've been in my best characters, and this episode could've been one of my favorites. And to add insult to injury, they did it again with ins season two, which I'll get to then. Aside from that dissapointment, I like Rei rei, as she's tied with Janja as my favorite villain who debuted in the show, and Jackal Style was a fun song, and hell, they even got Simba right. Too bad Dogo's flop almost ruined it for me.

Number four: Janja's new crew

Words: As I said, this is a pointless episode. No one gains anything, nothing changes, Janja doesn't apologize, though to be fair, that's not something he'd expect himself to have to do, and Nne and Tano just return in Never roar again anyway, so they could've just not betrayed Janja. Aside from that though, the song was pretty grating because Chungu's voice is so raspy, like for reals, I know this is for little kids, but you don't need a song in every episode. And Cheezi and Chungu get no development. I get that they're supposed to be the idiot duo, but at least have them stand up to Janja and make them demand more respect. Oh well. At least they're happy.

Number three: The lost gorillas

Words: You know any episode failed when the highlight is a somewhat funny fart from Bunga. The show's gashole. The gorillas got on my nerves with how annoyingly dumb they were, and while I like that they expanded a bit on Simba, giving him more insight on his friends, and I do like king Sokwe. He's pretty fun with how silly he is. Still, the gorilla twins are so annoying and forgettable that I don't even remembr their names. Hell, why not have Kion fart in this episode? It'd be fitting, since these retards actually like this kind of stuff. (Interviewing the gorrilas.) Mm-hmm. (Licks lips and points to them with both fingers.) Are you by any chance...retarded?

Number two: Can't wait to be Queen

Words: If season two didn't manage to make Simba worse than two bitches in the episode where they were annoying jerks, this would still be my least favorite episode. There are so many things I don't like here. I don't like how everyone thinks Kiara's plan would've worked even though the bees are easily startled. I don't like how Kion is somewhat mistreated. I hate Bunga in this episode. Zuri and Tiffu are just annoying bitches! I'll give it this. At least when Kion and Kiara make up, it's not one sided. Even if Ono ruined it. And I did like Simba's plot here, as it was kinda funny and developed him. But fuck it. I still hate this episode. And Tiffu's roasting was weak.

Number one: Beshte and the Hippo Lanes

Words: While I like Beshte's story, I can't fucking stand the side plot of this episode, for one sole reason. Bupu. He's a constant annoyance in the episode, whining constantly when the Guard tells him to move, and even throwing a little hissy fit when they're in a storm, RISKING THE LIVES OF THE GUARD AND HIS HERD, all for a please. WHAT THE COCK PISS!? And no, it's not Bupu being obnoxious that bothers me. The show putting him in the right is what pisses me off! Say all you want about Amythest turning into Rose to fuck with Greg in Steven Universe. At least the episode it was in, Maximum Capacity, knew she was in the wrong. This episode expects me to believe it's perfectly okay to act like a retarded brat, RISKING THE LIVES OF HIS HERD, WHO STUPIDLY AGREE WITH THIS, AND THE LIVES OF THE GUARD, JUST BECAUSE HE DIDN'T GET HIS PRECIOUS MANNERS! Fuck you Bupu! How the Guard takes your crap after this is beyond me!

Sonicbronyuniversez: Okay. So now that I just went over the episodes I DON'T like, here are my favorites.

Number five: Eye of the beholder

Words: As I said before, this episode shows perfectly why Ono is so necessary in the guard. While I can't say for sure, I feel like there were some people out there who were confused about how Ono could contribute to the team. I was one of those people. That said, Ono's in my top three favorite characters of the show for his kindness and wit, and how well he works off of rest of the guard. He's snarky, funny, blunt yet optomistic, and is the smartest member of the guard. Even more so then Kion. I did think he was somewhat helpful before, but this showed me why he's so useful. Also, he's more than ready to show his annoyence with someone. Keep it up dude.

Number four: Lions of the Out lands

Words: Even though this is almost all for fan service, I fucking love this episode. And not just because Jasiri finally gets a well deserved return. Despite there being a few plot holes, and I was bummed out to find that Kion and Kovu ended on somewhat bitter terms, the song for a while was my favorite in the show. Until a dissapointing special managed to top it. Why did you do that Rise of Scar!? Anyway, Jasiri once again is used greatly here, as we get to learn more about her caring and vulnerable side, as opposed to her snarky, fun loving, and adventurous side. She's the highlight of this episode and she knows it. So savage how she made Nuka her bitch.

Number three: The trail to Udugu

Words: Took you long enough writers. Kion and Kiara worked off each other so well in this episode, acting how siblings WOULD act rather than being retarded to each other. This is the first time they bonded properly, and I can't wait to see more of it. Baboons may have corrected me on who Zuri and Tiffu were, but this showed why I like Kiara in the show. Even if she's somewhat bitchy in contrast to how she was in Lion King 2. I also really love Simba's story when he's leading the guard. Honestly, the main reason I don't outright hate Simba here, is because he at least tries to be a good father and King. How did we go from this to The Asshole Summit again.

Number two: Never judge a hyena by it's spots

Words: Despite my dissapointment with Jasiri's lack of deserved spotlight, the way this show treats her is fantastic. This has a great moral about getting along, and an even deeper message about racism. And despite me giving Jasiri some gross habits and having her fart the most in The Legend of Kion, as she's a tomboy like here, only she's a main character in my story, I still try to give her story driven development and treat her right, and she's in my top three in between Kion and Ono. Also, this may have hinted at Kion and Jasiri's becoming mates with how Kion likely blushed from Jasiri's friendly push. And they sang a fucking duet together! I ship themfor life!

Number one: Never roar again

Words: This is the perfect episode to show a Kion hater that the dude isn't a Gary Stu. Kion's vulnerability is shown perfectly here. He's not an idiot like in The Savannah Summit's second half, and everything is done right here, along with everything else he does, from his confusion with the roar, to Bunga not being annoying when mentioning the roar a bunch. Kion isn't blamed at all for what happened, and doesn't have anything to be forgiven for. This treats the moral it teaches the best out of all of them. Also, Makuu's actually good here, as he looks like he's about do something dark to Nala. Too bad it made him worse in The Savannah Summit.

Sonicbronyuniversez: Well dudes, that'll do it for my first ten words or less video. I can't wait to do more of these, as they're a lot of fun, so if you have any requests for me then just leave one in the comments below. I'm Sonicbronyuniversez, and if you like any episodes I don't like, or dislike any episodes I like, that's perfectly fine. Hell, I'll even help you with an episode you missed a point about if you want.