"All you want is meat! Eat your vegetables, Ellis!"

The knight, who's usually covered in metal from head to toe, removed her helm as it was time for lunch. Her mouth was stuffed with food, making her look like a quokka. She then glared at Haniel.

"What I eat is none of your business!" she fumed.

"Don't give me that crap! I bet you're all skin and bones under that armor!" Haniel dissolved into hysterics. "What if your body gets sick, huh?!"

The black-haired mage leaned closer to her with a hideous look on his face, like a yakuza harassing a kindergartner. Geez, this is so weird and hilarious.

"Since when have you cared about me, wizard?!"

"I don't give a damn about you," Haniel stared daggers at her. "I only care about your body!"

"Y-You!" Ellis gasped dramatically. "That sounds so wrong in every context! How can you say that in front of your lover? Kallen, did you hear him?!"

Impervious by their childish bickering, I shrugged and focused on my own meal. Since I told Haniel about Ellis last night, he's been acting like this.

"Look here," Haniel made cracking sounds with his hands. "You shall eat your veggies, or I'll tell your crush about your six-year unrequited love?"

"Gah!" The knight got up and took all the plates with veggies. "Give me all those green and leafy vegetables. I love them! I would even eat grass!"

It was a humid afternoon, and the four of us were lazing around at the back of the two-storey house.

Garet, the middle-aged man assigned to look after the camp in the absence of the princess, went to negotiate with the clans of the southern lands.

On the other hand, Alistair was nowhere to be found. I was told that he doesn't stay here in the camp. He only comes to report to Her Highness.

Thus, we were the only ones here today.

While the two were busy pulling each other's hair like chaotic siblings, Princess Odette joined me on the table. To be specific, she sat right beside me.

"Those two exude siblings energy, don't they?"

My brows furrowed. Why is she making small talks with me? To be honest, I'm still feeling out the princess, and I can't say I already trust her.

When it comes to transmigrators, I learned it the hard way from Ruth Alessia di Camellia. They're not to be trusted, since they know the novel like the back of their hand; a transmigrator's edge.

I may be one as well, but it's not like we're the same. I have no memories of my previous life.

On top of that, I don't remember the whole plot.

While Ruth and Princess Odette are using their knowledge of the novel to navigate the story, here I am blindly walking through it. So no, I'd rather not get involved with Her Highness too much.

My goal is to finish the story asap. I'm only here because the plot requires me to join Princess Odette's faction. I won't get too attached.

"We're always accompanied by our guards, so I never really got the chance to talk with you one-on-one, Kallen." She smiled amicably.

I ignored her and sipped from my cup of tea.

"So, how did you die?" The princess asked rather excitedly. "Let me guess. Was it truck-kun? Ehe!"

I kept a poker face despite her friendliness.

"I wasn't lying when I said that I don't remember anything from my past life." My voice sounded more frigid than intended. "So I have nothing to share to you, Your Highness. My apologies."

Princess Odette looked rather sad at my response. One thing that I've noticed about her is that she has a very readable face, like an open book.

"That must be tough," she commented. "But you know, that makes me feel a bit envious, Kallen."

I quietly glanced over her. She's envious of me?

When she saw the questioning look on my face, she continued.

"You see, the memory of my death remains vivid on my mind." she said in a delicate voice. "It was daytime. The weather was nice, and there was a long queue in my fan-signing event as an author. Even though it was a bit humid that day, my fans looked really happy while falling in line for me."

She kept twiddling with her hands, a clear sign that she was anxious while recounting her story.

"And then this particular fan came next. She was a beautiful girl, but I noticed that she looked a bit ragged. Dark circles under her eyes, wrists so thin that they might crumble upon touch... One look at her and you'd know that something was wrong."

I listened to her narrative out of courtesy.

"But as a public figure, I was told not to cross the line. If I show too much concern towards anyone, others will demand the same level of attention."

"Fair enough." I slid that comment.

"Yes. So I didn't ask what's wrong. I simply waited for her to give me her personal copy of my novel, so I can sign it and get it over with just like that."

I placed my teacup on the table. "And then?"

"Well, instead of a book, she gave me a knife..." The transmigrator tapped her forehead. "Put it right on my brain, and that's how I died. I was killed by a fan who turned out to be a psycho."

What a horrible way to die. 

"When you have such kind of memories," Princess Odette smiled. "Don't you think that not being able to remember it is a blessing in disguise, Kallen?"

Well, I wouldn't know.

I was no more than an unfilled glass.

Unlike the imperial princess, I am an empty man. I know nothing about my past identity. I neither bear attachment nor resentment for my previous life, simply because I have no memory of it.

Still, I cannot seem to agree with her.

"I beg to disagree. Having your memories is still the real blessing. They're proof that you existed."

I really mean it. If I could choose, I would have preferred to retain the memories of my past life.

If I could remember even a fraction of who I was in that world, that would've helped me feel more alive. I could have clung blindly onto my identity.

It would have been my only salvation in this hell.

"The world will forget about you." The side of my mouth lifted. "If not you, who else would honor and remember the life you lived, Princess?"

The sound of the wind and the rustling leaves somehow calmed my nerves. When I glanced over Princess Odette, however, she didn't seem to share the same serenity that I felt at that exact moment.

On the contrary, she turned so pale that her lips were barely there. Her Highness looked like she saw a ghost after hearing the words I uttered.

My eyebrows met. "Princess?"

"Oh," She snapped back into reality. "I'm sorry. It's just that somebody told me the same thing before."

The princess immediately averted her gaze from me. She smiled, but it barely reached her eyes.

"Who was it?" I inquired, slightly intrigued.

"Someone I loved dearly," Her face hardened as she answered. "And despised at the same time."

At that moment, something bizarre transpired.

While the princess was smiling bitterly in front of me, another image appeared on my mind. It only happened for a split second, but it almost felt like my reality was momentarily distorted and a new scenario overlapped with it, but it was blurry.

Before me was a girl with black hair and slanted eyes. She was happily talking to me, but I couldn't make out her words. I thought it was just a vision of the novel, but I came to realize that it wasn't.

After all, the girl was wearing modern clothes.

A high school uniform, to be exact.

Princess Odette tilted her head. "Kallen?"

To my horror, a distorted sound suddenly filled my head. Feeling disoriented, I sprung out of my seat, eyes widened due to the excruciating pain.

Her Highness panicked beside me. "H-Hey!"

Both Ellis and Haniel, who were fighting like cats and dogs, looked over my direction. Before I could even walk, a shrill scream escaped from my lips.

My legs weakened and I helplessly collapsed on the ground. I wasn't in the right mind anymore, but I remember screaming beyond my control.

All my comrades rushed over to my side, concern evident on their faces. I also saw the deathlike pallor of Haniel when he heard my screams.

Stop it, I repeatedly said inside my head.

It felt like a portion of my mind, which was left untouched for a long time, was forcibly opened.

Waves of memories came flooding into my mind. But rather than being enlightened, it felt like I was drowning from all of them. It was too stimulating.

"Shit," Haniel muttered as he held me in his arms.

My eyes moistened with tears. "I-It hurts!"

"I know," His face softened. "Sleep for now."

The mage gently placed his hand on my eyes and muttered some incantations. The pain gradually subsided as I drifted further into deep slumber.

Perhaps it was true that ignorance is bliss.

Unlike the princess or the villainess, I was thrown into this world with no knowledge about my past life. And so, it couldn't possibly hurt me anymore.

Still, why did they have to erase my memories in the first place? Was it to protect me from an irreversible heartache? Was my life too tragic?

Every time I die here, I wake up as somebody else.

I bear many names, and I live different lives. 

But, why? What exactly is the reason for me to go through this hell? Why are they doing this to me?

Am I being punished? What did I do? 

Among the memories that I saw, one particular scene was permanently carved on my mind.

Despite the hazy recollection, I saw it clearly.

A knife on my hands soaked with blood.

Who exactly did I kill in my past life?

That was the starting point.

Due to my subconscious longing to remember my past life, the gods granted my wish. Unbeknownst to me, I was about to read another tragic story.

It was the story of three different individuals.

And how a single book altered their lives forever.

---

It's been a while! I hope you're all doing well.

Stay safe and happy reading, everyone!

Yours Truly,
Aomine-san