~Aiden

It was my favorite sound... our baby’s heartbeat.

I sat in the chair beside Breanna’s hospital bed, my fists clenched tight on my thighs. Tears slipped silently down Breanna’s face, but she stared out the window at the falling snow as the doctor checked her over. She still wouldn’t look at me. Not since she took that hard fall that spun my world off its axis. When she fell, it almost ended me.

Driving like a madman in the snow, I hauled ass to the hospital. The rest of our family and friends were taking a detour the minute I called them to tell them what was happening.

Now, with her elbow bandaged, she’s hooked up to a myriad of machines that monitor the baby and her. The lines jumped on the heart monitor, a steady pulse telling me our baby was okay. Still, the fucking anvil in my chest, the fist wrapped around my throat wouldn’t let me loose. Worry for the baby, for Brie, ate at me.

Doctor Wittmer straightened up on her stool.

“Right now, there are no signs of fetal distress or placental abruption. Or internal bleeding” She looked at Breanna. “You said you had a cramp?”

“Yes,” she replied with a sniffle. “After I fell.”

“Okay.”

The doctor turned a wise eye to the band strapped across Breanna’s belly. “We’re monitoring you for contractions. This could be the start of labor.”

My chest tightened, and I could barely force my next breath out.

“It’s too soon.”

Breanna pressed a hand against her mouth to smother a sob.

“The survival rate for babies at thirty-five weeks is the same as that for babies born at full term” Doctor Wittmer smiled and stood, her dark eyes crinkling at the corners. “Rest, relax. I’ll be back to check in on you.”

I’m frozen, processing the news, when Breanna’s heart-wrenching voice let out, “This is all my fault.”

I frowned.

“Don’t,” I gritted out.

Tears streaming down her face, she rested a hand on her swollen stomach, her gaze still trained out the window.

“I shouldn’t have gone outside.”

“I’m not going to do that, Brie. Or let you blame yourself. Absolutely not.”

“Why not? I deserve it” Another sob ripped out of her, shaking her frame. “I’m a terrible person. The baby could have been hurt.”

I shook my head, but she continued without even a glance my way.

“I know I overreacted” she swiped angrily at her tears. “I should have just stayed calm and eaten a croissant.”

I scooted closer.

“It’s not your fault you worry about your family,” I let out.

Finally, she faced me and there was fear in her eyes that made my stomach roil, nerves getting the best of me.

“Listen to me, my love,” I said, taking her slack hand in mine and stroking a thumb across her knuckles. “Everything's going to be fine” I brought her hand to my mouth, pressing a kiss against her palm. “I promise, okay?”

“You don't know that, Aiden,” she said, defeated and sniffling. “We can't lose this baby,” she said in a small voice. “It’s our child. We're responsible for keeping this baby safe. Nothing should happen to our child and I risked that. Do you understand?”

My throat worked as I swallowed.

“I understand that. But I need you to know that it's not your fault. I'm not going to let you blame yourself. Do you understand that?”

Without a response, she looked away. I slipped from the chair and got on my knees in front of her.

“Listen to me, Brie. I love you” he said, squeezing her hands in mine. “You’re my undoing, my entire fucking world. And I’m not going to let anything happen to you or our baby” I closed my eyes. “I promise. This isn't your fault and our baby's going to be fine” my voice cracked.

A long silence filled the hospital room. My heart rate was off the charts. If I were hooked up to that monitor, alarm bells would ring.

Then her sweet voice, my saving grace, said softly, “Okay.”

My heart caved in with relief.

“We're leaving here with our baby, okay?”

“Okay,” She faced me, raising her gaze to meet mine.

Her beautiful brown eyes brimmed with tears.

“I don't wanna be alone, Aiden. Don't go okay?”

“I'm never going to leave you,” I breathed, launching up.

I couldn’t get her in my arms fast enough. Our mouths collided, my hands threading through her silky hair. Breanna exhaled and gave a little moan, and I tightened my hold.

“Thank you,” I murmured, kissing her hair, her cheek, her throat. “For being mine. I don't think my heart could've handled it if you weren't.”

She closed her eyes, scratching her slender fingers through my beard.

Her very touch licked through me like wildfire.

“I know. Mine either.”

Gently, I lowered her back down against the pillows and tucked the blanket tighter over her lap. Splaying my hand over her belly, I waited for the baby’s kick. Strong. Powerful. Like Breanna.

To think of how close I came to fucking it all up.

I was never letting her go again, so help me God.

“If it makes you feel any better,” I said, squeezing her hand, “I almost killed a whole flock of geese hauling ass to the hospital.”

She laughed, then thinned her lips at me.

“What is it, my love?”

“I’m still upset” Her mouth quirked up. “I never got to have my Belgium cocoa.”

I chuckled and traced a finger over her cheekbone.

“You can have as much as you want later.”

“I will. And you can’t complain.”

“Deal.”

Grinning, I leaned down and kissed her.

“I should go call and tell everyone what’s going on. You’ll be okay without me for a few minutes?”

At her nod of assent, I shoved up from the bed, already itching to get back to her. When I was halfway to the door, Breanna gasped. I ripped around, my heart tripping into my ribs and crashing down into my stomach.

“Brie? What is it?”

Breanna looked up at me with wide, horrified eyes. Across her blanket spread a dark stain.

“My water broke.”

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

~Brie

The wave crashed down, and I let it take me. I let it sweep over me in long, reassuring flushes of warmth. Birth was wild. And I surrendered to the ride. I wanted to be worried, but I was too happy. Giddy with the realization that it was happening, that the baby would soon be in my arms.

Our baby.

I paced the room. The nurses let me walk, and where I went, Aiden followed. For hours. The baby’s heartbeat was strong on the monitor. I had a plan, and Aiden was there to make sure I got what I wanted. Though nothing had gone as planned tonight, I was going to birth my baby my way, the best I could.

“You got this” Aiden stroked my hair as I breathed. “Breanna, my brave girl.”

Draped across his broad chest, I felt his heartbeat in lockstep with mine. His broad, muscular arms banded around my waist, roping me to him and never letting me down.

“I love you,” he said. “I love you. I love you.”

I sagged in his arms, my forehead dipping to his armored chest.

“I love you too,” I whispered.

Over and over until another contraction hit and I started pacing again. Hours passed. Outside, the sky was light, the snow still falling. It was all pain now. Cramps in my belly. Radiating through my hips, my spine.

My legs went weak. I doubled over with a groan and Aiden was there. Always that big, broad palm guiding me, helping me when I wasn't strong enough. His massive hands massaged my hips, holding me when I needed support, and releasing me when I paced. I tried different positions.

“These aren’t working,” I said, rising from the yoga ball.

“Handstand?” Aiden suggested, trying to hide his grin.

“Screw you,” I panted.

Like all those women on all those TV shows, soon, I stopped pacing and was in bed. I reclined against Aiden’s chest. He held my exhausted body in his arms.

I barely heard Doctor Wittmer instructing me to push. All I focused on was Aiden and the jump of our baby’s heartbeat on the monitor.

Focus gave way to frustration. It’d been hours and I was tired. So damn tired. I couldn’t push the baby out even if I was being poked with a cattle prod. My head fell back against Aiden’s chest, sweat dripping down my brow.

“I can’t do it,” I cried breathlessly. “It’s harder than I remember.”

“You can,” Aiden rumbled next to my ear and kissed my sweaty temple. “You can do it, my love. My Breanna. My brave and sexy girl.”

Inhaling the longest breath, I closed my eyes. Then I pushed. I unraveled. A heaviness down below, a sharp burst, a relief. Somewhere in the room, someone announced they could see the head. I sobbed.

Aiden’s deep voice reverberated in my ears as he whispered, “You’re a rock star. You’re so damn strong. I've got you.”

His trust in me bolstered me. Gave me strength. I wasn't alone like the first time. With Aiden here, I could handle anything. The nurse commanded me to give one last push, one last push, and I did.

Gripping Aiden’s broad hands, I bore down. One long, last push, a howl like a wild animal, and then there was a slow sucking feeling and blessed emptiness. Doctor Wittmer ducked between my legs.

“It’s a girl!”

Oh God.

Before I could ask if my daughter was okay, there was a sharp, bright cry. Steady and true. Strong.

Eden.

I burst into tears. The baby was whisked away to be checked over and Aiden kissed my temple and smoothened hair from my sweaty brow. He shook beside me, whispering his joy, and then the nurses placed a baby, a fat pink baby, in my arms.

Love.

It was immediate and heart-wrenching. Like part of my soul was in my arms and I was holding it, only it was a better part of me. The weight of love.

I only sobbed harder when she wrapped a finger around mine.

“Hi sweetie” I sobbed.

We locked eyes, Eden’s intent gaze never moving from mine, like she knew me already.

Dark eyes, I thought.

Blue. Brown. Whatever Pantone color they were, I couldn’t tell. It didn’t matter. It was all beautiful.

“Look Aiden,” I said, trembling.

I turned my face up to Aiden, who was standing above me.

“She's ours. We made another baby.”

Aiden’s throat bobbed. His blue eyes shone with emotion, with tears.

“You did so good, my love. So damn good.”

“Our little girl,” I smiled. “Roman is going to be over the moon.”

Gently, I traced a fingertip across the curve of Eden’s sweet pink cheek. Aiden chuckled. Almost hesitantly, he ran a finger over our daughter’s downy shoulder. She lay calmly in my arms, staring up at me. My gaze lingered on her, soaking in every inch, and then moved to Aiden.

I couldn’t stop the rush of love. This man, who’d been here for me since the beginning, who’d never left me. It left me breathless for a moment.

There will never be enough time to tell him how much I love him.

The moment spun on, nurses attending to me as Aiden and I drank in the sight of our baby girl. And then there’s a tug down below. Sharp. Strange. Suddenly, everyone in the room was moving, examining the monitors, talking in hushed whispers.

“What?” I asked, lifting my head to see Doctor Wittmer frowning down at the space between my legs.

“What’s wrong?” Aiden’s voice came.

The world was heavier than it was only a moment ago. Disconnected. My head felt like it’d float away from my body. And I was trembling. Then a rush of something warm drained away from me. Like I was leaking.

I was.

“Call a Code Noelle!” Doctor Wittmer ordered.

A flurry of movement, of sharp commands, erupted in the room. I looked at Aiden, worry lacing every word.

“She’s bleeding.”

It was awful. The way Aiden’s handsome face changed. Happiness to confusion to fear. I licked my dry lips, the very act draining.

“Aiden,” I whispered.

My heart was a freight train in my chest. The sheets beneath me were soaked. The blood ran up my back and into my hair. He was tense, standing tall, his worried blue eyes flickering to me, then to the nurses.

“What does that mean? What’s wrong with her?”

“Aiden” my head lolled on the pillow.

My eyelids were getting heavier and heavier.

“Take her,” I whispered, trying to get his attention, rallying all my strength to get the words out. “Take the baby.”

And then I went limp, my eyes fluttering closed. Eden sagged in my arms, only to be snatched up by Aiden before I lost grip completely.

Someone was yelling, the monitors explosive bursting with alarm. Aiden was shaking me, my name a desperate, ragged chant on his lips.

“Stay awake.”

A woman’s voice.

“Stay awake, Breanna.”

An endless sky of black in my dimming vision. But with no stars.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

~Aiden

In a hard plastic chair, I sat, every ounce of strength sapped from my body. My head was buried in my hands. The waiting room was full. Not everyone was here but my sister, Leslie, Ronbie, Megan, Dove, Zachary, Nia, and Emmett were, and they all sat in stunned silence, barely moving. No one spoke.

I was scared. More scared than I’d ever been in my life. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t shake the image of Breanna in that hospital bed.

Blood-soaked sheets, her pale face, her soft whisper of warning. She went limp before I knew what was happening. I barely had time to grab our daughter before every person in the room jumped into action and hustled me out of the delivery room.

Now all I could do was wait. Fury, and worry boiling over, my head and my heart were already gone. I wanted to hit something, kill someone even. I couldn’t see my daughter. I had no goddamn idea how Breanna was.

A squeak from Megan had me glancing up. Doctor Wittmer stood in the waiting room. I rocketed out of my seat.

“How’s my—” I stopped myself.

I hated myself. Hated that she was still not my wife. Getting over the lump in my throat, I managed to speak.

“How’s my Brie? How’s our daughter?”

“The baby’s fine,” the doctor says, her tone soft. “We took her to the NICU to get checked over, but right now, there are no complications. You have a healthy baby girl.”

I sucked in a sharp breath, letting the news settle.

“And Breanna?”

I barely recognized my voice. Anguished. Ready for the grave. Doctor Wittmer cleared her throat.

“Aiden, her placenta tore after delivery. She hemorrhaged.”

A round of gasps went up in the room.

“Her blood pressure dropped. She’s in shock.”

“Shit,” Zach said, sounding panicked.

The frightened look Iris gave me had me wanting to jump out of my skin.

“What does that mean for her?” I asked, tearing a frustrated fist through my hair.

“We need to take her to emergency surgery to repair the hemorrhage, but that means we need blood. Breanna’s AB-negative.”

Oh crap.

With her face grave, Doctor Wittmer looked around the waiting room.

“We’re low on blood. With this storm, I don’t know if we can wait for it to be flown in.”

I turned to Emmett whose shoulders sagged immediately.

“I'm not an AB-negative, Aubree is. And she's stuck in the storm with my parents and the kids. I don't know if they'll get here in time.”

“She can receive from an AB-negative, an A-negative, a B-negative, and an O-negative” Doctor Wittmer said, looking around the waiting room, “We can test if you don’t know, but we have to do it now. We don’t have a lot of time. If we don’t treat her quickly...”

Iris’ sob broke the stunned silence of the moment.

God no.

No.

I heard the unsaid— what would happened if Breanna didn’t get that blood. If we couldn’t find it. If it took too long.

The waiting room blurred around me. An awful roaring in my ears prevented me from hearing the low murmurs of my friends and family, while I battled the urge to lose it. My legs gave out and I collapsed into the chair again, closed my eyes, and tried to breathe.

A hand clamped down on my shoulder. Ron.

God, I can’t do this again.

Lose the woman I loved. It couldn’t happen.

“I’m B-negative,” a voice said.

When I opened my eyes, it was Beckett Lewis.

“What are you doing here” Nia asked.

Her husband’s eyebrows shot up at him.

“I called Bruce. I heard Breanna was in the hospital and I... I wanted to come see how she's doing. I overheard the doctor. I'm a B-negative.”

Zachary's jaw ticked. Beck looked at me and then at the doctor.

“I have my Red Cross card here. I’ll go. I’ll donate.”

Some amount of relief rushed through me.

“Go,” Iris urged, her voice teary, her head buried in Leslie’s chest. “Please go now.”

He pushed past me, stopping only briefly to squeeze my shoulder.

“It’ll be okay,” he assured, his voice cool with calm.

All I could manage was a numb nod.

“Drain me dry, doc,” Beck said, and then he disappeared around the corner.

I couldn’t sit here. Helpless and waiting. I couldn’t fucking stand it. With that, my heartbeat dangerously close to flatlining, I shoved up out of my chair and moved in the direction of the exit doors and into the rising dawn.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

Outside the hospital entrance, my breath puffed white in the air in front of my face. It was freezing, but I made no move to warm myself. I don’t stuff my hands in my pockets, I don’t hunker down against the frigid wind. I didn’t deserve warmth, not when Breanna was fighting for her life.

Hand smearing down my face, I tried to breathe steadily when everything inside me was a tight ball of fear. It felt like I was falling off the edge of the earth, watching everything I loved slip away. All these responsibilities I never thought I’d have—now they were all I wanted.

Breanna woke me up. Made me love again. Gave me not one, but two kids. I couldn’t exist without her. Dawn was on the horizon. Only a few stars glittered in the early morning light.

“Screw you,” I told it, my face tilted toward the vast emptiness above me.

The universe was mocking me. I didn’t have time with Jewel, and I wouldn’t have time with Breanna. To lose her, after all this...

Fuck everything. Fuck the snow. Fuck this hospital. Why wasn't she safe and healthy and holding her daughter?

Our daughter.

The mental image of Breanna not waking up, of never holding Roman or Eden again. Of our daughter never knowing her mother.

I squeezed my eyes shut, willing the dark thoughts away. A rustle of noise came behind me, but I didn’t bother turning.

“We drew straws” Emmett settled beside me, lifting the collar of his wool-lined jacket to block out the wind. “To see who’d come piss you off.”

I dragged a hand down my chin.

“Go inside, Em.”

“And let you wallow all by yourself? Ain’t gonna happen, my man.”

A long silence passed as we stared at the sky. The sunrise was a brilliant blast of pinks and purples that’d put Mexico to shame.

“I can’t lose her” my voice cracked, pain lacing every word. “I can’t.”

“I know” Emmett shoved his hands in his pockets. “And you won’t.”

“I should’ve—”

“Don’t,” his friend interrupts. “You got that same look on your face as you did with your first wife. Iris told us. You’re blaming yourself. You do that, and I'll take you out back and kick you into a snowbank.”

I let out a frustrated exhale and he clapped a hand on my shoulder and squeezed.

“She’ll be okay. You can’t keep Breanna down. She's scarier than Aubree, Aiden. She'll be fine.”

I chuckled, wiping my wet eyes.

“My parents are here. They brought Roman. Aiden you've got a daughter in there too” Emmett jerked his head toward the automatic doors. “She needs you. Roman does too. And so will my sister. No come on. Come back inside.”

I dragged in a breath, sucking icy air down into my lungs.

“I need a minute.”

Emmett watched me, released my shoulder, and disappeared inside.

“Please,” I begged the sky.

Jewel.

“I know you see everything, Jew. Fix her.”

Anguished, I buried my face in my hands, my breath a warm pulse against my palms.

“God. Please.”

Dropping my hands, I tilted my head back once more.

“You’re up there, I know that. So I'm asking you to save her. Please. Save my Breanna.”

I let out one last breath, said goodbye to Jewel, and went back inside.

Thank you so much for reading! ✨