A/N: I'm not really one for putting specific content warnings on chapters, especially since you've made it this far in the story, but this chapter is the beginning of Theo really going through it for a little bit both in real time and in flashbacks. For specifics, please refer to the Author's Note at the beginning of the story or the end of the chapter. 

Today (Evening)

The bar across from their hotel was exactly the kind of dive bar that Abel greatly preferred and Theo felt at ease in. At first, they sat at one of the tables to eat some surprisingly delicious wings and loaded french fries. By then, it was late in the evening, and most of the patrons were there for the food and maybe a beer or two after they'd gotten off work.

There were, in fact, a couple of pool tables along one wall, with low lamps hanging over their velvety tops. So, after they finished eating, they played a couple of rounds. Theo mopped the floor with Abel until he pouted into his beer and complained that Theo could at least let him win one. Theo laughed and teased that he could teach Abel to play better instead.

After another game, they went over to the bar, and the bartender offered them each a drink on the house. For Theo because he was simply impressed, and Abel for being such a good sport. Their game and banter around the pool table had been a great source of entertainment for him on a monotonous, routine weekday evening.

"Even if it's a mixed drink?" Theo asked as he hopped up on the stool and leaned on the counter.

"Whatever you want, kid," the bartender nodded.

"Can I get a...sex on the beach?"

Abel almost missed the stool as he tried to sit down, and the bartender tossed his head back to let out a raucous laugh. He tossed down his towel and picked up a jigger to twirl it in his fingers. "And for you, sport?" he asked Abel.

"I'll just have whatever local brew you've got on tap," he said.

As the fruity, blushing orange cocktail slid across the counter toward Theo, Abel eyed it with this look on his face that meant he was holding back from saying something. But he did not seem upset. Theo wrapped his hands around the chilled glass and raised a brow at him. His eyes widened like he'd been caught at something, but before either of them could say anything, the bartender slid Abel's beer to him as well.

"Do you want to open up a tab?" he asked.

"Sure," Abel reached for his wallet again and handed one of his credit cards over. Theo chewed on his lips as he watched the bartender take it away. He no longer had any money to contribute, so it was always Abel who paid for everything. Not that he had his own money in the first place. The only thing Ken ever gave him was a credit card with a strict spending limit that he monitored like a hawk. But now, he did not even have that.

Maybe getting an ID so that he could try to get a job somewhere so that he could try to buy Abel dinner or drinks sometimes would be nice. Plus, maybe that would convince his aunt he was a responsible adult who could handle things like furniture and whatever she was worried about him being unable to handle in the case of the bungalow. Adding an ID and a credit card and, maybe, eventually getting a driver's license seemed like another good way to restuff himself.

"What are you thinking about?" Abel asked him.

Theo wiped a few swirls into the condensation on the side of his drink, then hummed and took a sip. "I'm going to need to get a wallet."

Abel pursed his lips and nodded. "A wallet. Right. And your own pair of sunglasses. Don't think I forgot."

Theo beamed at him. "I know you wouldn't forget."

Abel nodded seriously and took a sip of his beer. Theo's mind started wandering to what kinds of jobs he might be able to get as he took another sip of his drink. It was fruity and sweet, and his face scrunched up from the citrus and alcohol. Then he noticed Abel staring between him and the drink again.

"What?"

Abel pursed his lips. "Nothing."

"Uh-uh," Theo shuffled around on the seat to face him. "What?"

"Just," Abel sighed, looking extremely put-upon and anxious at the same time, "It's nice to see you enjoying something like that."

Theo stared at him for a moment, then smiled a bit shyly at the cocktail. He turned the glass a few times, looking at the water it left behind on the counter. Ken hated it when he drank stuff like this. Theo stopped drinking them because of that and because they had a higher sugar and calorie content.

"They are yummy," Theo wiggled a bit in his seat with happiness and took another sip. He'd been trying a lot of new things today and doing a lot of scary things, so he thought he deserved something that he knew he would enjoy and had not often let himself have. That was also a part of his effort to restuff himself. People who weren't just shells had likes and dislikes and indulged in things that made them feel good sometimes. Plus, it seemed to make Abel much happier and more relaxed.

They chatted through another couple of Abel's beers while Theo sipped his drink. He may have indulged himself, but he wasn't about to get more than one of these cocktails. By the time he finished, his eyes were drooping, and his head felt heavy on his neck.

"I think I'm going to go back to the room and go to sleep," he told Abel.

Abel, who's begun watching a football game pretty avidly on the TV screen above the bar, tore his gaze away and nodded at Theo. "Let me just close out the tab."

"You can stay and finish watching the game," Theo assured him, sliding off the stool. He turned to head for the door, but Abel grabbed his arm and stopped him from getting very far.

"Just wait a minute," Abel told him. "And I'll come with you."

"You seem to really be enjoying the game, so why don't you finish it?" Theo insisted.

Abel frowned. "Are you sure you will be okay? It's not a big deal."

"I'm not some little kid that you need to keep an eye on 24/7," Theo complained. "I can cross the street by myself."

Although he'd found himself feeling and maybe acting like one around Abel more than he probably should have been since he picked him up from the police station yesterday.

Abel's fingers remained curled around his forearm for a few heartbeats. Then they let go and leaned against the bar, his head tilted back, and lips pressed tightly together. He looked chastised. Something hard flashed in his eyes that Theo could tell by the set of his jaw was directed inward.

"You're right," he nodded, "I'm sorry for treating you like that."

Theo nodded back firmly, then spun on his heel. But his heart felt like a lead weight sinking slowly to his feet, so he turned right back around and planted himself between Abel knees to duck his head forward and press their lips together. Abel immediately melted beneath his touch, parting his lips and tilting his head for Theo, who slid his hands up his thighs. Then Theo broke the kiss and nuzzled their cheeks together.

And in a low murmur against his ear, he said, "Definitely not a little kid. Wake me up when you get back to the room if you want."

When he pulled back to walk away for real this time, Abel's fingers wrapped around his wrist again. He huffed an annoyed sigh and turned back with another complaint on his lips, but it immediately died when he saw Abel pulling the room key out of his pocket. He handed it over without a word.

Theo pursed his lips as his cheeks heated. "Thanks."

Abel just grinned and let his wrist go so that he could turn his attention back to the game.

By that point, it looked pretty dark through the windows, but when he stepped outside, there was still plenty of light with which to see. The cars zipping by on the street between the bar and the hotel had their lights on, but the parking lot lights were still dark. As he walked across the parking lot, though, they flipped on.

Theo stopped at the edge of the sidewalk and looked both ways. The sun had not quite set yet, easing its way down the horizon behind a stand of trees so that the bruised purple sky peeked through their branches. The long shadows had faded into a gradient of grays and muted colors that sank ever so slowly into darkness. He was grateful for the parking lot lights because they kept the encroaching night at bay. A pair of headlights approached. As soon as the car swept by, he hurried across the street to the hotel.

He liked this hotel because the room doors were all along the outside of the building, so he did not have to go through the lobby and feel the concierge's eyes on him or pass people awkwardly in the hallways. But it also reminded him of...well, the times when he went to hotels where men he was with did not want the concierge to see him.

The room next to theirs was now occupied. On the door handle hung a do-not-disturb sign, and in the parking spot next to Abel's car was a low, dark sports car that was still running. A man sat in the driver's seat, talking on his phone. Theo quickly looked away, his heart thudding in his chest.

His fingers fumbled with the room key, sticking it into the slot in the door backward the first time. He cursed under his breath and tried again. Maybe he should not have insisted that he would be okay alone. But he did not want to have to rely on Abel for every little thing. He needed to be able to go places and do things by himself. He used to be able to do all that just fine until yesterday.

The lock finally clicked, a little green light flashing at him, and he pushed the door open. As always, he immediately flicked the light on. Then nearly pissed himself because there was a figure in the room.

He might have stepped back out, slammed the door shut, and sprinted back to the bar. But his mind snagged on the fact that this might be one of his delusions. It would be mortifying if he had so confidently assured Abel he could go to the hotel room alone, only to run back to him crying about a man in their room who did not exist. Like the one he saw earlier during lunch. And so, his reaction lagged.

Unfortunately, the man was real enough to step forward, grab him by the arm, and shut the door behind him. He was thrown bodily onto the bed. The mattress bounced beneath him, and he scrambled onto his back.

"Hello, Theo."

The whole world shrank to the thud of his heart and the dark eyes.

It had found him.

"You know, some of the people back home are pretty unhappy about what you did to Ken." There was a flash. A knife reflected the harsh overhead light, which wasn't enough to keep him safe against things like that. The light only helped with imaginary threats. "But I'm glad you got rid of that motherfucker."

Of course, Colby would be glad Ken was gone because that meant he did not have to worry about Ken finding out how much he slept with his prize pony. Because the demon was in him now. Theo's eyes flicked toward the door.

"Ah-ah." The knife twirled towards him, and he scrambled back, hands sliding across the duvet in his desperation to get away. But Colby followed him to the head of the bed, knees sinking into the covers. He put the blade flat against Theo's ankle, then dragged it up to his knee, then his thigh, then his neck. Theo trembled and wished to close his eyes but was too afraid.

"Please," he whispered, unable to squeeze anything else out. He just wanted it to be over.

"You're begging me already, sweetie?" Colby growled. "Want me to fuck you that badly?"

"Please don't."

Colby laughed meanly, twisting the knife against Theo's neck beneath his jaw to make him lift his chin up. He looked between Theo's eyes, then down at something by the pillows. And his amused smile turned nasty.

"You know, I always used to think Ken was too soft on you," he said. "Letting you have things like stuffed animals."

He sat back, taking the knife away from Theo's neck. But there was no cause for relief because, in his other hand, he now held the shark. Theo's stomach flipped.

"No, don't."

"Stupid of him to let you keep children's toys like this." Colby turned the shark over and considered it, knife twirling. "Look where it got him, hmm? No, you need to be treated with a harsher hand. And now that he's gone, I've got you all to myself."

Theo's eyes flicked to the door once again. Panic rose in his throat.

"You think your little boyfriend can help you? This was for him, you know."

Theo tore his eyes away from the door and stared at Colby in horror. He was looking at the knife as he twirled it around his fingers. Then, with knowing eyes and a cruel smirk, he looked at Theo and said, "Ken let you have too much rein. I think I'll keep you on a tighter leash."

He placed the shark on the bedspread between them, and Theo reached for it. But before he could grab it and gather it to his chest, where it would be safe and could soothe the ache of panic rising inside of him, the knife stabbed through its back.

His hand froze, trembling in midair. His breath caught in his throat. And he could not believe what he was seeing. The demon had never hurt his shark. Unlike all of the other friends with whom the demon seemed to have a problem, it never did more than scoff at the shark.

Now, it put a hand on the shark's tail and tore the knife through its fabric, past the curved fin on the top towards the head. White and fuzzy stuffing popped out.

Theo wailed, surging forward to grab Colby's arm and pull the knife away. Colby whirled on him, the shark falling silently off the bed as he kicked out to get on top of Theo and press the knife to his neck again.

"You wanna end up like that?" he growled. Theo did not know. All he knew was that he did not like the cold press of the blade. The room spun around him. Tears were streaming down his face. His chest hurt as if Colby had already dug the knife deep into it and ripped him open.

"Jesus, shut up."

He had not even realized he was babbling as he wept, begging and pleading. Maybe he should be silent, like the dead, like the shark was now. Then, the demons would leave him alone. But he'd tried that before, and it never worked. So, he kept muttering and sobbing until Colby fisted his hair, lifted his body, and dragged him off the bed.

Then his string of nonsensical words turned into a single wail of pain.

They were suddenly outside. For a moment, the deafening rush of a tractor-trailer passing overwhelmed him. Colby dragged him by the hair across the parking lot to a car. He opened the door to the backseat and tried to shove Theo inside by his hair.

Theo gripped the hood of the car and fought with all of his might against the pain so he could lift his head and scream, "Abel!" as many times as he could manage. He tried to break free so he could run across the street and to the bar, kicking back against Colby and putting one hand on the fingers threaded through his hair to pry them away.

Then something white-hot seared the hand still clinging to the roof of the car, and he looked down in shock. The knife was sticking out of the back of his hand, blood welling around the blade. When Colby yanked it back out, Theo screamed, and his hand spasmed away from the roof. He was shoved into the backseat, and while his mind was overwhelmed by the shock and pain, Colby managed to lock his wrists into a pair of cuffs that were wrapped around the underside of the passenger seat. This left him half on the floor and half in the seat, bent awkwardly beneath the window and bleeding everywhere.

The car door slammed shut and they began moving.

For as much as Theo ended up feeling helpless, he hated it. He yanked on the handcuffs a few times, then gave up and stared at the trees whipping by over his head. Despair clawed at his chest, and fear burned his throat.

For a long time, he went numb to the fear, accepted his role, and became something that scared even himself if he looked back on it. He would lure men into temptation at Ken's bidding and without it. Despite telling Abel that Ken would not care if they slept together, Theo had always known that if Ken ever found out how much he had been sleeping around—giving himself out like he was a counterfeit Birkin bag being sold on the side of the road—he would have flipped his lid.

He knew about some of his guys and Theo. He did not mind giving them a little incentive, letting them feel like VIP because they got to touch his pet. But if he knew how often and how many, he would lock Theo away again. For his own good, of course. It was dangerous to walk around when he was so tempting. And because it wasn't good business to give something away for free when it should be making him money. Because that was all Theo ever was to him.

Four and a half years ago (about six months after Theo and Ken met)

"Is this how it is?" Ken asked, scoffing at the scene in front of him.

They were at a party. Theo had felt like he was on top of the world just twenty minutes ago. He'd been hitting the gym with Ken some, although he'd more so gotten into the habit of going himself. His waist was now thinner and lean, accentuated by a hint of muscle – but not too much because Ken said he liked that Theo was willowy. He liked to wrap his big hands and long fingers around Theo's waist to see how they were only a couple of inches from touching. But Theo's favorite part of starting to work out was watching his abs develop, and his arms shape up. He didn't take it too far, lest Ken decide he did not like how he looked.

Ken had told him that he loved the way he looked tonight. Theo wore a crop top for the first time because he was so proud of how his stomach looked and he'd always wanted to. The brush of the hem against his ribs made him giddy with delight. And Ken had approved. He even gathered Theo onto his lap for everyone to see. Even when Theo leaned forward to snort a line of coke off the coffee table in front of the sofa they were sitting on, he wrapped his hands possessively around Theo's waist and kept his ass planted firmly against his crotch. It gathered heat in Theo's waist below his touch, and sparks tingled at the base of his spine.

But he could not sit on Ken's lap forever. The man eventually needed to take a piss. He pushed Theo up with a little tap on his butt and told him to refresh their drinks while he was gone. So, Theo had gone over to the minibar in their host's dining room – these places always seemed to have minibars, if not fully stocked ones. He was opening the Grenadine for Ken's Dirty Shirley when someone stumbled into him. The red syrup spilled onto the back of Theo's hand and dripped down his arm.

"Sorry," the guy said, holding Theo's shoulder to steady himself, "I think I probably do not need another drink."

He reached around Theo to set his empty glass on the countertop. His chest pressed against Theo's back as he did, boxing him in and making him shrink into himself a bit.

"That's okay," he said in a small voice. Despite having come to a decent number of these parties by now, he did not know anybody well and felt shy and awkward without Ken beside him.

This guy stepped back, letting Theo breathe easier, but kept the hand on his shoulder. He was older than Theo, probably in his thirties, with a sharp fade and an unbuttoned silk shirt fluttering around his bare chest. His lips drew tight, and he closed his eyes in discomfort.

"I think I'm gonna be sick," he moaned.

Theo's eyes widened, and he scrambled to put the syrup bottle down to grab the guy's shoulders and hold him upright. He glanced around a bit desperately. Ken was in the bathroom down here, but there was probably another one upstairs.

"Come on," he urged the man toward the hallway so he could guide him up the steps. When they got to the top, the guy leaned heavily on Theo as he assessed the selection of doors, trying to decide which one was most likely the bathroom. The guy's arm slipped down from his shoulders and wrapped around his waist, thumbing just below his belly button.

"I think I'm just a little dizzy," he groaned, "I should probably lie down."

With that, he used his grip around Theo's waist to pull him toward one of the doors.

"What are you?" Theo protested, trying to shove the guy away or peel his hand off his torso. But he was far stronger than Theo and suddenly not all drunk and stumbly anymore. He shoved Theo into a room, closed the door behind them, and stalked forward.

Theo stumbled back

"You really are his little pet, aren't you?" The guy laughed meanly, "First thing out of your mouth is his name. Ken this. Ken that. You think he cares? Why don't you scream and find out?"

Theo inhaled a big breath to do exactly that, but a hand landed over his mouth before he could, palm warm and sweaty and smushed against his lips.

"Better not," the guy chided. Then he ran a hand up Theo's torso beneath his shirt and pinched his nipple hard, eyes glinting when Theo squeaked and wriggled beneath him. It hurt. And Theo was afraid but not as afraid as when the hand disappeared, and he heard the sound of a zipper and felt a tug at his crotch. He started bucking against the bed and trying to shove the guy off.

The hand over his mouth disappeared, and he took in another huge lungful of air to call for help, but then it was knocked soundlessly out of his lungs by shock when the guy slapped him hard across the face. His head whipped to the side, bouncing off the bed, and he stopped struggling for a moment. His ears rang. A tang filled his mouth as blood filled it from where his teeth cut into his cheek.

"That's it, be a good bitch, and-"

A line of bright light fell across them as the door opened.

"What the fuck is going on?" Ken growled. Theo immediately tried to crawl toward the sound of his voice, but he was hobbled by his pants down around his thighs and blocked by the man still looming over him. Then, when he actually looked at Ken, he froze, heartbeat pulsing unpleasantly through his ringing head.

Ken was not looking at the guy on top of Theo. He was looking at Theo. And he did not look angry; he looked disappointed. His arms were crossed over his chest, and his lips were pressed thin.

"Is this how it is?" Ken shook his head, "I leave you alone for one minute, and you find your way upstairs with another man?"

"Ken-" Theo breathed, voice trembling. He started crawling forward again, but something flashed in Ken's eyes that made him stop.

"You're just a slut aren't you?" Ken spat. "I bet that first night at the frat house, you wanted to go with that guy, didn't you? You went home with me without a fight, after all."

"That's not-"

Ken laughed sharply, "I bet you wanted the whole frat house to take turns. Well, guess what? I'll make your dreams come true. Do what you want with him."

With that, he stepped back out of the room and disappeared. Theo stared at the empty doorway, pure shock shearing everything away except the spot where his boyfriend had just been standing. He couldn't even parse the meaning of his words.

"See?" The guy said, making Theo's heart leap into his throat because he had been so wholly focused on Ken that he forgot about him. "Ken doesn't give a shit."

"No," Theo pleaded, pushing the man's hands away when they grabbed the crotch of his pushed-down pants to drag him closer again. "No, I have to..."

He had to go after Ken and fix this. He wasn't cheating. He didn't want it.

But the guy held him down. The space between them filled with heat and pleas and pain. Then, another figure darkened the door, and Theo was nearly afraid to look.

It was not Ken, but another man. And then another. And another. All with their hands on their flies and a glint in their eyes. And then, finally, Ken. He stepped into the room and closed the door behind him, leaning back against it and crossing his arms. The room fell into darkness again, only illuminated by the streetlights outside the windows.

In the shadowy room, where the contrast was low and only shapes could be seen, Theo watched as the light from the street made Ken's mirror-black eyes shine. And he knew what this was. A tear slid down his cheek. This was the demon. They were materializing out of the shadows, grabbing Theo's hands and cupping him around them, taking turns between his legs and in his mouth.

It had found him again.

He was no longer afraid. At least he knew what was happening. He had been fooled because the demon was always playing him for a fool. It had to wait for the right time. It couldn't show itself where other people might see. Like a game of hide-and-seek. Always waiting in his closet.

But he hated feeling helpless. So, he threw his ass back and opened his jaw wide and never looked away from his demon's glinting eyes and spreading smile. 

A/N: This is again one of those times where the narrative doesn't necessarily show the whole picture because it is from Theo's perspective and he is in the throes of Ken's manipulations. 

Content Warnings: kidnapping, violence/blood, sexual assault, emotional and sexual abuse. 

Part of why I wrote this nonlinearly was because I wanted to have certain flashbacks line up with each other in the narrative, as well as with certain parts of the day during the real-time portion of the story. It's getting dark out and Theo is reliving a lot of his traumas from different times and on different levels all at once, but the some of the realizations that come out of it are what will be able to help him begin to heal and 'restuff' himself. Thanks for sticking with the story this far (I know it's an angstfest, holy moly). We are nearing the end now <3