✯ E V E L Y N ✯

My eyes are swollen.

Eva and Charlie are gone out to their dinner while I'm stuck in the house, crying myself to sleep at eleven in the night. I bet no one in a First World country is sobbing over how unfair life is when there are other people struggling to live.

I carefully wipe my eyes. They are tender, red-rimmed. I catch sight of myself in my mirror and see what a mess I am.

I look awful. My hair is clumpy around my pale face, my lips tugged in a frown and my cheeks are blotchy.

The girl staring back looks nothing like how she did four years ago. Then again, a lot can happen in four years. People can die. Friendship ties can snap. People can drift away from each other.

There's a loud knock on the door that echoes throughout the whole house, startling me. I stay silent, sliding into my slippers and going down the stairs.

There's a half-hearted knock almost swallowed by the sound of rain, and I open the front door to reveal Lio.

Since there's a shelter by the front door, she's free from the horrendous rain that pours onto the sidewalk.

Tired, unfocused eyes blink at me in the approaching darkness, a hand brushing wet hair from her eyes. "Lio, wh—come in," I say, changing my mind on questioning her while she's drenched.

I open the door wider and bustle her in, slamming the door behind us. Lio still hasn't spoken yet, too busy focusing on rubbing her hands together. Water from her soaked clothes drips onto the clean floor, but I ignore that and usher her up the stairs. "Shit, you must be freezing."

I'm wondering why she doesn't say a word, but I still drag her into a guest bedroom, sitting her on the bed.

And that's when I look at her. She has a faraway look on her face, a small smile permanently plastered on her lips as her pupils dilate, even when I turn on the light overhead.

She's freaking high.

"Uh," I stammer, unsure how to approach the situation. Lio blinks at the wall behind me before focusing on me, her damp blonde-brown hair framing her oval face. She looks content, most likely the aftermath of drugs. "What did you take?"

She must know what I mean, because she replies, "Girl Scout Cookies," with a loud giggle that lasts a full minute. I'm guessing it's some sort of weed.

A damp patch spreads over the white bedsheets, and despite her calmness she's shivering.

And so, with a heavy sigh, I get to work.

"Take off your jacket, skirt, and shoes," I command, refusing to let myself blush. Thankfully, Lio's wearing thick leggings under her skirt - very smart because it's 32° outside - and a camisole over her bra. It takes a few minutes to help her out of her clothing, the leather of her skirt sopping wet.

Lio sits on the bed in her underwear, and I have to take a few deep breaths to calm myself. "Okay, I-I'll get you something to wear," I tell her before rushing to my room and grabbing some warm, comfy clothes.

The last time I checked she was at least two sizes bigger than me - jacket/shirt wise - but I'm not sure about her pant size. It would've been a good idea for you to check the size of her skirt, my conscious snarks, and I roll my eyes at my stupidity. That would've been a great idea. I guess her size and grab a clean pair of pajama bottoms.

When I get back, I let out a yelp and screw my eyes shut, swiveling around with my back to her. "Um, he-here are the c-clothes," I stammer, holding my arm out behind me so she can grab them. The image of her naked body imprints itself in my brain. My heart races, my hands shaking and my breaths uneven.

This is the first time I've seen a female's body in its nudity - unless you count my own and old paintings lining our hallway. A breathless feeling hits me, and I shift from side to side as something inside me heats up.

Lio doesn't seem too bothered - it could be because she's not in the right state of mind, or because she's comfortable with her body. But, if it's the latter, she has every right to be. It sounds extremely pervy in my mind, but she's perfect. A small waist, ample curves and slim legs . . . a wild fire spreads across my cheeks, unable to be tamed.

"You can look now," Lio mumbles, and I turn around.

The sweatshirt I picked out for her is a little bit baggy, looser than I thought it would be. It hangs over her dainty shoulders, ending a little above mid-thigh. The pants are loose on her, which is a relief. Her damp hair is pulled up into a messy, cute bun on her head. And, although she's clearly still cold, her skin glows, free of makeup.

She's stunning.

"Are they comfortable enough? I wasn't sure what size you were because I didn't check, and yes, I should've checked because they may be too big or small on you, but they look alright from where I am, but, like, they could actually feel tight on you or be on the verge of falling off—" Lio cuts my rant short with an airy laugh, shocking me by kissing my cheek.

"They're perfect. Thank you, Evelyn," she murmurs, "Is there a place where I can let these dry?"

I push my black hair from my face. My fingers are shaking, for some reason. "Um, yeah, I can put them in the dryer for you," I choke out, taking her damp clothes and carrying her wet, slightly muddy Nike's in my other hand. "Uh, you might not get these back for a while because they'll get hand-washed and air-dried, but you'll get them back as soon as possible."

"No worries." She shifts on her bare feet, and for once she has nothing to say. The damp clothes are pressing against me, no doubt making my tank top wet.

"You must be hungry. Come with me; I'll get you something to eat while I take care of these clothes."

She follows me down without a word, her hand gripping the railing of the winding staircase, and into the living room, where I beckon her to sit down on the sofa. I put the clothes into the washing machine, figuring they'll have a damp smell by now. I leave Lio's shoes in the corner for someone else to take care of. That is when everyone gets back from their one-day-holiday.

My thoughts are a frazzled mess as I grab a plate and a variety of snacks. What is she doing wandering around in the middle of the night? Why is she high? Why did she come here? I empty a pack of crackers, cookies, Pop Tarts, nachos and peanuts onto the plate, arranging them so they're not touching each other.

"Here you are," I announce as I walk back into the dim living room. I set the plate in front of her on the small coffee table, and Lio gives me a wan smile. She's sitting cross-legged, hands clutching each other, and despite her looking okay, I can tell she's cold by the goosebumps on her arms.

I run up to the room where we keep all our towels and blankets and grab a big, vintage one with tassels at the end. "Thanks," Lio says gratefully as I wrap the blanket around her shoulders, and she snuggles into it.

"No problem. I'll get us a drink as well."

If Eva was here, she'd have an aneurysm at how much of a civil, considerate and compassionate host I am to Lio. But then again, the fact that Lio turned up as high as a kite might not sit well with Eva. Still, the fact still remains that Eva isn't here, so we can do pretty much whatever we want.

∞

☾A L I Q U I S☽

The effects of Calliope being high are wearing down.

Her eyes are more focused, her brain no longer numb and she has stopped giggling at everything. But her heart hasn't stopped racing in her chest.

Maybe because of the girl sitting beside her.

Evelyn Winters.

She looks beautiful. Her hair flows over her shoulders, her keen eyes wide and expressive, her thin arms wrapped around her slim legs. She doesn't know how much it hurts Calliope to look at her, see her perfection and feel flawed compared to her.

The sound of Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen comes from Evelyn's phone, filling the long silence. The light overhead is turned on by the dimmer switch, and it falls over them like the blanket wrapped around their shoulders. Fat raindrops hitting the roof are audible in the quiet house, as trees blown by the wind scrape the windows.

Evelyn takes a final sip of her coffee, placing the empty mug on the coffee table and eating a cream cracker. Calliopes slender fingers wrap themselves around her warm mug, sipping as she gazes at her painted toenails.

Evelyn's phone suddenly rings out, scaring both of them half to death, and Evelyn picks it up, sliding accept.

"Hello?" she answers, sitting back down on the sofa, repositioning the blanket over her. There's faint talking from the other side of the line. "Um, yeah, I'm fine . . . I've got a friend over . . . I'm not sure if she'll stay over but if she does I have everything sorted. Yep . . . Okay . . . Yeah, I love you both too. Bye."

She hangs up with a heavy sigh, the music returning as she places her phone on the table beside the plate of snacks. I can tell she's relieved that the conversation went well between her and her parents. Evelyn thoughtfully chews on a cookie, unaware of Lio's gaze fixated on her.

Lio sets her empty mug on the table, shifting to face Evelyn. Evelyn's eyes swivel towards her, and I notice the way her eyes drop down to Lio's neck before lifting.

"So, that was your parents, right?" Evelyn nods, biting her lip.

"They know you're here. They're cool with you staying over, by the way," Evelyn babbles a little nervously.

Lio finds it hard to keep her gaze trained on her eyes. "Do they know how much of a bad influence I am on you?" She says this while moving closer to Evelyn, her heart ready to hammer its way out of her chest as she faces her fear.

Her hands trail to hold Evelyn's waist, eyes darkening with something unlike lust as Evelyn visibly gulps. As Lio presses her chest against Evelyn's, she can feel her rapid heartbeat, and she knows she's just as affected by this as she is. They lock gazes, and something heated passes through the slowly narrowing gap between them. Evelyn can't find the right words to say, a lump stuck in her throat.

Lio's hands raise to settle on Evelyn's shoulders, her fingers ghosting over her arms. A shiver crawls down Evelyn's spine as her back arches against the armrest, a slow burn deep in her abdomen.

«I will never sacrifice my love, not even for you»

«You know I don't play it safe,

Sometimes you have to break the rules»

A blush spreads over Evelyn's cheeks as a slow, sultry song comes on while Lio struggles to hide a smile.

«We could call it love, or we could call it nothing»

Evelyn bites her lip as Lio places feathery kisses up and down her throat, fingers running up and down her arms. "If you keep biting your lip I'm going to do something I shouldn't," she whispers in Evelyn's ear, inhaling her sweet shampoo.

"And what's that?" Evelyn breathes out, her hands tentatively touching Lio's waist.

"You don't want to know, princess."

Evelyn looks up at Calliope through thick lashes, teasing as she bites and releases her lower lip. Her hands tighten on the blond girl's waist, her breaths becoming heavier as the need to feel her becomes more intense.

"Show me."

«Let me just lay you down»

«Turn me on, take it all tonight»

Calliope's lips brush hers. Not innocently, like a tease but hot, fiery, passionate and demanding. She wants to pull away before she loses herself but she can't. In that moment, her senses have been seduced and she can no longer think straight.

Calliope plays with Evelyn's hair before gently tugging, a soft gasp of pleasure eliciting from the brunette's mouth. "Evelyn," she whispers, prolonging each letter as if to savor them.

Calliope's hands wander downwards to grip Evelyn's hips. A soft sigh escapes her lips as the sweet taste of chocolate on Evelyn's lips lingers on hers.

"Oh God," Evelyn murmurs between soft kisses, nothing but euphoria taking over her. Her hands slip under Calliope's sweatshirt, fingers tracing small circles on her soft skin. They both shudder as their bodies melt into the other, their tongues against each other like syrup.

Calliope loves the way Evelyn doesn't pull away from her in disgust. She cups the younger girls cheeks, breath hitching at her touch. Her cheeks are many shades of pink, her heart catching fire when her bottom lip is captured between Evelyn's teeth. "What are you doing to me, Evelyn?" she whimpers, not loud enough for Evelyn to hear.

The two are blissfully unaware of everything but their bodies, their lips molding, breaths mingling, fingertips touching as they lace them together. I love you. These words are on the tip of Calliope's tongue but try as she might she can't emit them. Not because Evelyn's mouth is pressed against her, but because there are so many doubts in her head.

Evelyn's kiss stole the words she didn't need to say. In that moment all their secrets were laid bare, all their passions and the spark of love that existed between them. In that moment, in Lio's love, she was strong for the first time.

An ad from Spotify blares out, and Calliope quickly crawls away in fright, heart racing at the sudden disturbance. Evelyn's cheeks flush pink, eyes shining as her back is pressed against the armrest. After the ad has passed and another slow song comes on, Evelyn lets out a nervous laugh to diffuse the awkwardness, and soon Calliope is giggling softly.

∞

✯ E V E L Y N ✯

"You're so beautiful."

My voice is hushed, almost silent. I watch Lio, the weight of her head resting on my shoulder nothing compared to the weight on my chest. She's asleep, she has been for about an hour, and I've been looking at her. Wondering why the hell someone as perfect and quirky as her even glances at someone like me. Wondering why I can't be like her.

I've got these secrets bottled up inside of me, and it hurts to breathe. I want to get that weight off my chest.

I trace Lio's lip with the tip of my finger. It pouts slightly, and I have a sudden urge to bite it, to kiss it, to get intimate like how we were before.

"Something happened a weeks ago, when I went to a party with Jesse," I confess in a hushed tone. Lio's flat stomach rises and falls with every breath. I make sure there are she's asleep before I continue, "Every time I try to remember, my brain goes blurry. The flashes of memories that I usually see paint a vivid picture in my mind, but . . . it's not pretty. Not at all.

"And after that happened, I found myself at this person's house and I did something that I shouldn't have. I think I only did it because I was upset over the . . . over the party.

"I ran off after that and didn't see them until this afternoon. It was awkward, to say the least. But I explained everything to them and things are now fine and platonic between us. It's not like it would have worked in the first place anyway." I trace circles over my thigh, dwelling in my thoughts.

"There's something wrong with me. I keep fucking everything up. Every friendship or relationship I once had has gone down the drain. I don't know what to do with myself anymore," I whisper, feeling tears gather. I inhale, admiring Lio curled up at my side.

She looks so peaceful and content. Everything that I'm not. "But, I mean, I'm friends with Jesse. We've known each other for about two months, but we're already close.

"Things are different with you, though. I can relate to you on a personal level even if we are polar opposites. When I'm around you I . . . I feel things that I shouldn't. I think these feelings only came after what I did two weeks ago. But, the thing is . . . I've never been with a girl before. I've never been attracted to a girl like how I'm attracted to you. I keep trying to convince myself it's all in my head, but that kiss proves everything. And what's even worse is the fact that-

"I think I'm bisexual."