[mature warning]

< m i n y o o n g i >
2017 —

yoongi woke up with a fright, tightly clutching his white t-shirt. he instinctively looked to his side, disappointment washing over him as he realized no one was there.

with a grunt, he got up off the motel bed and walked to the large window beside him. he peered out the window as he wondered what his next move would be to find somewhere to live. the bright LED sign with the name of the crappy motel he was hiding out at shine brightly in the night sky, almost no cars parked in front of it.

yoongi sighed as he hung his head, a hundred thoughts running all at once. he walked back to the bed, falling on his back as the bed made a creaking sound.

he wondered how much longer he could live like that, jumping from motel to motel. though living alone came naturally to him, ever since his mother passed away and his father began coming home later and later until he finally disappeared one day, even he had to admit the debt he now carried was too much to bear alone.

yoongi clenched his hands into a fist, he wished it could just end already. constantly running from debt collectors was not as luxurious as the movies made it to be. In fact, it was downright terrifying.

yoongi stared at the white painted, chipping ceiling above him, his thoughts drifting off to his high school years just as he always found himself doing at one point or another.

he sneered in disgust as he got up off his back. "they're the ones who left me behind, they're the ones who left. not me." the same sentence going over on repeat in his mind as the anger slowly rang in. he blamed them for the misery he was in, his old friends and her — it was all their fault, not his.

his eyes landing on the lighter sitting coldly on the bedside table, the familiar thought running through his mind. he reached over, his hand brushing against the cold plastic of the case. it was almost instinctive, the thoughts of going out with a fiery blast. that'd show 'em, he mused as he stared at the worn out lighter almost as if it were enchanting.

he traced his fingers over the initials "Y.K.", his mind wandering off to a bitter thoughts once again.

she always was someone who'd drag me out of the fire, but this time she was the one fuelling it, he thought, a humorless laugh escaping his lips. what perfect irony.

as he gazed at the lighter, memories began flooding in. painful memories, most were of him.

he clicked the side and watched the fire flicker. he watched in awe as the tiny flame stood tall one second, then flickered the next, only to remain its flaming form. he wondered if it was possible to have that kind of resolve for humans; if it was possible to stay unwavering no matter what gust of wind was thrown your way, to always stand back up and burn as bright as ever like this tiny flicker of fire was.

yoongi almost laughed aloud at the idea and, in a single move, blew the flame out.

eventually, all things must come to an end.

yoongi got up from the bed, eyeing the gasoline container sitting in the corner of his room. he flicked the lighter on and off as he made his way to the gasoline.

as he leaned down and wrapped his hand around the nozzle, unscrewing the top, one thought continuously repeated in his head. the same words that were carefully written on the paper sitting on the bedside table as his last will and testament.

"she's the one who killed jungkook, and now she'll get what she wants from me."