chapter 11 too much sugar
"Open wide," Jimin encourages, holding his spoon out to me. It's a perfect bite, including every part of his meal: kimchi, rice, and egg. My mouth waters at the sight of it and I can't resist such an amazing bite.
I lean across the small coffee table between us and open my mouth to welcome the bite. Jimin's eyes light up and he reaches out to feed me. The spoon hovers in front of my mouth, the delicious scent of food wafts into my nose. I try to take the bite but he pulls his hand away at the last second.
Jimin giggles when I glare at him and offers the spoon again. "Alright, alright, here you go."
I take his wrist to make sure he won't pull away and finally take my bite. I smile to myself, enjoying its taste, and sit back. I finish up the last of my cold noodles and take a long drink of my hot chocolate now that it's cooled off.
Jimin finishes up his plate and serves himself a third helping of rice. I had no idea he was so hungry, or that he could eat this much. Between the two of us, we might land ourselves into bankruptcy on account of our massive appetites.
My heart flutters at the thought of "us." It feels a little too soon to start talking about Jimin and I being one unit, but it will happen at some point. We are living together, after all.
"Aren't you full yet?" I ask with a playful smile. I gesture to his third serving with my mug in hand. "You'll explode if you continue on like that, sweetheart."
Jimin pauses mid-bite, his cheeks flushing light pink. He lowers his spoon and shrugs at me, "I'm a bottomless pit. I can eat forever."
I raise an eyebrow at him but decide not to ask why he's blushing. "Ah, true," I reply simply.
I set my mug down and drag myself to my feet. My stomach feels bloated but I don't regret having seconds. This meal was meant to remind me of what I missed during my two days in the hospital. I start gathering up the plastic dishes and takeout boxes and set them on my plate. I walk back into the kitchen and begin cleaning up.
It only takes a few moments for Jimin to join me. He offers to take the trash outside to be picked up when I give him an odd look. I point to the garbage chute that's covered with a sliding metal sheet. "Just put it in there."
Jimin's eyes widened with curiosity. "You don't have to take your trash out?"
I shake my head, "No, the apartment doesn't want us wandering around." I smile wryly, "Less people traffic, I guess."
Jimin nods slowly as he looks over the kitchen. "It's so nice here," he comments, "you must have a lot of money."
I bite my tongue as I am about to tell him that I'm practically broke. I found this apartment by luck and had extra scholarship money to pay for it. All apartments have trash chutes, most houses even have special trash slots to make pickup easier for sanitation workers. It started becoming popular when I was in middle school.
Was he kidnapped at a younger age than I thought?
He was kidnapped from his family, turned into a hybrid, and God knows what else those men did to him. I feel deeply ashamed that I continue to forget this. It feels too crazy to be real, too horrible to accept.
To his credit, Jimin seems well-adjusted and normal. Maybe that's why I continue to forget. It appears like Jimin has moved on, or is pretending to be okay.
I pray it isn't the latter.
"Mm. So... what do you want to do?" I ask him, changing the subject. "We can watch a movie, play a game..?"
Jimin opens a random cabinet out of curiosity and peeks inside. "Is this where you keep your medicine?"
I blink in confusion and look over his shoulder to confirm. "Yes, that's the medicine cabinet. Why do you ask?"
Jimin studies the pathetic amount of medicine sitting on the shelf. "Do you have sleeping medicine?"
"Oh, so you want to sleep?" I assume, moving past him. I grab the cold medicine off the shelf and study the small bottle for a moment. "This one helps you sleep when you have a cold. Do you have trouble sleeping?"
Jimin stares at the bottle in my hand. He nods slowly.
The doctor didn't say anything against giving him sleeping medicine. Maybe it'll help him relax on his first night here. It's no surprise that he has trouble sleeping.
I offer him a small smile, "There's no reason to feel ashamed about it. I get it. Sleeping can be difficult. I can give you one, two would be too many." I open the bottle and pick out one pill, "Do you know how to take pills?"
Jimin grimaces slightly, "Yes..."
My eyes soften with sympathy. "Sorry."
He shakes his head, "No, it's fine." He takes the pill from me and stares down at it for a moment. "Do I need water?"
"Oh, yes of course." I turn around and grab a glass from another cabinet. I pour him a cup of water and hand it to him. "Just swallow and you should be sleeping in no time, okay?"
Jimin stares at the pill in his hand for a moment more. "Alright." His voice sounds more distant than it did before.
It seems like the lighthearted moment has passed.
I leave the kitchen to give him space as he takes the pill; personally, I hate it when people are watching me take medicine. I head into the living room and lounge on my couch, already tired from the half-day at home. I already feel my head beginning to ache.
I close my eyes and allow my body to relax. I lie perfectly still and begin to count inside my head... one by one, fluffy white alpacas leap across a white fence. How I wish I could sleep without conviction, but I have a few things I need to take care of before then.
"Eden?"
I open my eyes to find Jimin kneeling in front of me with a mug of hot chocolate. He offers it to me with a gentle smile, "Here. I made it for you. I added extra sugar too."
I sit up slowly and smile gratefully, "Aw, you're so sweet. Thank you, Chim."
Jimin's eyes flicker with brief guilt but his smile holds. "You're welcome."
I sip it carefully and fight to keep a straight face. He must have added two cups of sugar into it. I force myself to maintain my smile and give him a weak thumbs up. "That's a lot of sugar," I comment lightly.
Jimin watches me expectantly, his pretty eyes are sparkling with urgency. "Do you like it?"
I cough quietly and force myself to take another large drink of hot chocolate. I nod at him, pressing the back of my hand against my mouth, "Yep, it's great. But maybe next time... less sugar?"
Jimin ducks his head and smiles guiltily, "Oh, sorry."
I reach over and lightly pat his head. My fingers brush over the base of his soft cat ear, it twitches in response. Jimin looks up in mild surprise, staring at my arm above his head.
Embarrassed, I draw my hand back and decide on drinking more hot chocolate than unpacking whatever the hell I was just thinking.
I manage to finish the hot chocolate without gagging. I offer him a weak smile before relaxing back on the couch. "Where do you want to sleep? Tomorrow I'll go shopping for a proper bed for you, but for now..." I trail off and yawn widely, "Where do you want to sleep? The couch is open, you could take my bed if you want... I can sleep out here—"
"Can we sleep together?"
His question takes me by surprise. "Together?" I repeat.
Jimin nods and leans closer to the couch. He tilts his head down to be near my face. "I don't like sleeping alone," he complains quietly, "back there... I always had my brother... Taehyungie and I didn't like being alone."
Taehyungie?
Jimin's eyes shine with rising tears. He tightens his jaw and sniffs quietly. He rubs his eyes in an effort to erase the tears. "Please? Please, can we sleep together?"
I stare at him, stunned. "I—... I mean... just to sleep?"
He nods seriously. "I don't think I'd be able to fall asleep without somebody near me... I trust you. I don't want us to be apart longer than we need to."
That's an odd way to phrase that.
I yawn again and force myself to sit up. It takes more effort than expected. I meet his gaze and nod, "I guess I can. I don't think I'll do much sleeping, but I can lay beside you until you fall asleep. I have a few things I need to do—" I yawn again, "—I need to finish before I can sleep."
"You look sleepy," he comments lightly. "Are you sure you don't want to sleep?"
I give him an odd look as I drag myself off the couch. "No, I'm okay." I smiled tiredly and gestured to my eyes, "The dark circles were there long before now."
Jimin holds out his hand and leads me off the couch. I let him hold my hand and decide not to think about how hard my heart is pounding.
We walked into my dark bedroom together. It's too dark to see my desk and partially open closet. Jimin reaches the pillows first and waits patiently for me to join him.
There's something about him in my clothes, on my bed, his tail flicking behind him... it's low-key hot but I shouldn't think about that right now. This is purely platonic and all in the name of easing our PTSD, I swear.
As inviting as it is, I remind myself over and over again not to fall asleep beside him. I will only wait until his medicine kicks him then leave. I yawn, practically unhinging my jaw as I do so, and settle down on my usual side of the bed. I gesture for him to lay down but he remains sitting up against the wall.
He looks down at me fondly and lightly brushes my hair back. The smell of him is comforting, almost familiar now. With the softness of his skin, the curve of his lips, he looks almost angelic in the gray shadows of the bedroom. He seems too perfect to be real. Too sweet to exist in this unforgiving world.
I slip underneath my cool covers and settle into the curve in the mattress from years of use. I stare up at him, mildly confused why he hasn't laid down. "Are you going to join me?" I yawn again and feel my eyelids droop, "It was your idea, after all."
Jimin's face is shadowed as he watches me, his cat ears are outlined in the darkness. He pets my hair for a moment longer, his touch lingers on my scalp. With every passing second, it's becoming increasingly difficult to keep my eyes open. I didn't realize I was this tired before.
"Thank you for helping me, Eden. I will never forget your kindness. It means everything to me..." Jimin begins quietly, his voice full of emotion.
I squint at him briefly. "What do you mean?" My words begin to slur together. I can feel my mind drifting away, teetering on the edge of reality and the world of dreams. "Jimin...?"
Jimin inhales shakily as if he were on the verge of tears again. "You... you're safe now," he says gently, twisting his finger around a lock of my hair. "And now that you're safe, I have to keep going. I can't stay here anymore, I hope you understand... but I need to save my family."
What is he talking about? What does he mean he can't stay here?
My heart starts to kick against my chest. My eyes fight to remain open and dart across his face, desperate to argue against him. I reach up weakly, on the verge of falling asleep, and try to grab onto his wrist, determined not to let him go. "Chim..." I force out, "you can't—," another yawn interrupts me, "you can't go—"
Why the hell am I so tired?
He gently nudges my hands away and holds them down against the mattress. I try to fight against his grip but my body isn't responding. I start panicking that I am having a stroke due to the concussion. He leans over me and lightly kisses my forehead. "You're my family too now, and I promise to come back. But I need to leave. Don't look for me. I'll be back with the rest of my family soon. I promise I'll come back, Eden."
"Why?" I whisper, trying to sit up. "Why—, I can help you—, why are you leaving?" My eyes nearly roll back into my head but I fight to maintain consciousness.
Jimin's hand tightens around my wrists as he leans down again. He pins me down against the bed. His breath is soft against my face. I can feel his tail brushing over the sheets. "You helped me so much already... I need to keep you safe and I won't let you put yourself in danger for me."
"But I—, but I can't just let you—"
"That's why, sweetheart, I'm not giving you a choice."
His words stir up a rush of fury directed at him. The anger in my heart, the hurt I feel, nearly blinds me. I glare up at him and force my mind to remain awake for just a little while longer.
"You can't do this," I attempt to raise my voice but my muscles don't allow it. It comes out as a whisper yet angry all the same. "You can't leave. We're in this together, don't lie to me like this. I can help you find your family, I already said I would, why don't you want my help?" I stared up at him in disbelief, "I thought we were..."
Jimin's dark eyes soften, deep regret hides behind his mask of compassion. "I put you in danger once, I won't do it again. It's better this way. All I ask is that you wait for me."
"I'm coming with you."
"I'm afraid that's not up to you..." His face blurs momentarily. "You'll fall asleep soon. When you wake up, I'll be here waiting for you and you can finally meet my family. It will be better in the morning, Eden. I promise... just sleep."
My jaw slacks as the pieces fall into place. The realization turns my blood into solid ice. I felt my heart skip a beat.
He drugged me. It's why he used so much sugar in the hot chocolate. He used it to mask the taste of the crushed pill. He's drugged me to keep me from stopping him.
I clench my teeth together and glare up at him. "It'll take more than a pill to stop me from coming after you. You can't expect me to sit around and wait for you, did you?"
A slow grin spreads across his face which isn't the reaction I wanted. He nods slowly, "You're so strong, Eden. One pill won't stop you, but three will. I'll see you tomorrow..."
I should have seen the signs. I should have realized how serious he was about saving his family. I shouldn't have trusted him so easily. I had no idea he would resort to such extreme measures. I should have listened to the doctors when they told me to be careful. I thought I could handle him because I trusted him so much.
Everything seemed so perfect before. It was too perfect. He was pretending. He was planning this moment from the beginning.
I can't believe I trusted him so easily.
Without warning, I fall into a deep sleep and find myself trapped in the world of dreams, unable to open my eyes again. My thoughts blur together into nonsense and distant voices.
Distantly, I felt the touch of his hands leave my wrists. The weight of his body on the bed lifts and disappears.
Jimin is gone.
A/N: Presenting... an early update to make up for my late one! I wonder if you guys caught the hints! What do you think will happen next? What shall Eden do next? What would you do? I explained before that this was not going to be a normal hybrid ff, so what do you think so far? : )
From here on out, I hope you are prepared for what is to come. I'll tell you this: it's not angst. You have other things to fear and it isn't angst. Haha, that sounds ominous. Have fun, lovelies! This is when the action begins!
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