AUTHOR'S POV

William's mansion,
08:21 am.

Another day started with breakfast but it was more silent than usual. Won glanced at everyone before speaking." How's Ian?" He asked bringing everyone's attention to himself.

Reed raised his eyebrows. " You met him yesterday."

" I'm asking about his character." Won said turning his gaze toward his daughter. " His parents want Hazel and Ian to get engaged." He revealed what happened in their absence last night.

" What?" Edwin's head snapped towards Xaden who was staring at the soup bowl in front of him, stirring it blankly with a spoon. Too silent to be Xaden.

" Are you both dating?" Reed asked Hazel.

" I-"

" She's young." Tan interrupted. " She has just started her career. Why hurry in getting married?" He asked Won.

" Exactly." Edwin butted in no doubt what his intentions were.

" I'm just asking about Ian. What's bad about getting engaged? It's not like she's getting married anytime soon." The extremely convinced father quoted as Hazel cajoled him beforehand.

" But-"

" He's a good guy. Hazel will be happy with him. They also have a very good chemistry." The unexpected words came out of Xaden's dry lips. He looked up at Won then turned his gaze toward Hazel. " I'm full." With that, he left the dining table.

Edwin excused himself and rushed outside to catch Xaden who was about to sit in his car for the office.

" The hell you just said?" Edwin grabbed Xaden's arm and forcefully made him face himself.

" Truth," Xaden answered. " Ian is good for her. They knows each other since childhood. I think they'd look great together-"

" Are you insane? You have been doing all this shit for her for months only to give up like this?" Edwin asked thinking about what happened to him.

"I tried but nothing changed. I'm still as stupid as I was." Xaden said shaking his head. " Remember you said she'll fall for a good character. I tried but I give up on her I know I can't claim her heart. I can never be good enough for her. She'll never look at me the way she looks at him. She'll always choose him over me. Why won't she? After all, he's all she always wants. She never wants me." The last words were almost inaudible.

" Xaden, nothing is out of hand. I'll talk to uncle Won. We'll sort this out together. Trust me-"

" I saw them kissing." Xaden mumbled but Edwin heard him. Xaden looked at him with twinkling eyes. " She's not mine anymore. She was never. I've accepted this. I'll be good if you'll do the same." With that Xaden opened the car door and left with his secretary.

Edwin rubbed his forehead with one hand while the other was resting on his waist watching Xaden's car going out of the main gate but the rubbing speed slowed down and the hand hung as his eyes caught Jane entering the mansion who had her uniform on.

She asked for the keys from the watchman and walked further.

Edwin felt a bit relaxed as the only thing he expected from Jane was a resignation letter after all this.

" I'm sorry I'm late." She apologized and bowed before opening the car door for him.

Edwin closed his dropped jaw and blinked fast. He sat in the car next to her and locked the seatbelt around himself.

" How's Alice doing now?" He asked.

" She's good." Jane nodded turning the car smoothly towards the highway.

Edwin rested his head against the seat and sighed heavily. Almost the whole ride Edwin was silent which was pleasant for Jane's ears.

" Is Ian a good person?" Edwin asked out of the blue.

" I'm sorry?" She asked facing Edwin.

" You guys were together in the uni right?" Edwin said looking at her and turning her head to look ahead.

" We were." She nodded. " But I don't trust any men." She added dryly.

" Wow. Your ex must be an ass." Edwin chuckled speaking out his thoughts. He knows her trust has been broken which reflects her actions.

Jane's grip tightened on the steering and she pulled the break. The car stopped, luckily Edwin was wearing the seatbelt still he jolted a bit. " The f*ck." He growled.

" We are here, Sir." Sarcasm dropped from her words. She didn't need to say 'mind your own business' just like she said in first encounter with him, her eyes were enough.

On the other hand Edwin remembered her saying she ain't his driver. This brought smirk to his face.

Afterall he's Xaden's soulmate. Stubbornness runs in their blood.

" This ain't your damn yellow car. Drive carefully next time" He seethed in her face as she opened the door for him.

" Get down, sir. We are already late." She ignored his attitude.

" Good things takes time." He pushed his hair back stepping outside the car.

" So true" She said sarcastically. Her face spoke how agreed she was with her words.

Edwin was extremely closed to roll his eyes at her. He was never like this. He hardly used to pay attention to his workers or to any other middle-class people then Jane happened.

The more she wants to avoid them personally and wants only professional connections they are getting more and more involved in her life.

She pressed the elevator button from the panel and waited for it to go down.

" Where did you learn driving by the way?" Edwin asked wondering how she drives so perfectly.

" Difficult time teaches many lessons." The mystical reply triggered Edwin as he never gets a proper response to any of his questions from her.

" Why are you so difficult to understand?" He narrowed his eyes all over her face.

'Why are you so interested to understand? Stop studying me already.' she stopped herself from speaking anything rude because now she needs this job for Alice.

She was silent but her face looked so screwed. The elevator door opened with a ding sound. She stepped inside followed by Edwin and punched the floor number button they were supposed to be on by now.

She crossed her arms over her chest and rested her shoulder as well as the side of her head against the metal wall of the elevator.

" You look tired." Edwin begins looking at her up to down as she always stands straight.

" Because I am." Surprisingly she didn't argue.

" Take a day off if you want. I won't mind." He offered.

" I'm tied for years. A day won't help." She sighed heavily looking around at the luxury golden elevator. "How does it feel like to live like a prince?" She questioned. She was lost otherwise she never shows her weak side to anyone.

" Wanna experience for a day?" Edwin asked bringing her back to reality. " I don't know what you are going through but believe me, Jane. There's no charm in perfection. Sometimes we need to be nice to the people we really want to throw bricks at. I'm not saying my life isn't good. It'd be a lie. I'm just saying being real is so much beautiful and you are beautifully strong." He encouraged.

Jane's lips parted. She stared into his dark eyes with her gray ones. Not imagined she'd get to hear something from him.

She flinched at the sound of the elevator and realised she was showing emotions she was not supposed to show.

" CAN'T YOU MANAGE A DAMN THING ON YOUR OWN?" Their head snapped toward the loud voice on the floor they just reached, and rushed outside the elevator to see all the employees bowing their heads making a circle around Xaden who looked furious.

Some files with ripped papers were thrown on the floor and Sen was standing in front of him sobbing quietly.

" What is it?" Edwin's voice split the employees.

Xaden turned his hard gaze to Edwin who was aware of where this anger came from. Xaden went to his cabin with large steps and closed the door loudly.

" Go back to work everyone." Edwin commanded making them obey his words.

Edwin felt his arm in a tight grip. He turned to see Jane clenching it. Her face turned a bit pale. " Are you good?" Edwin asked putting his hand over hers.

She quickly pulled her hands back and stepped away. " I'm sorry." She muttered.

Edwin noticed her behavior. She was scared of the violence.

The day turned into the night but Xaden was still working. Sen came to inform him that the working hours has ended but he told her he wasn't done and asked for the car keys.

Sen knew she'll get scolded again by Tan if she'll obey Xaden yet she gave him the keys as well as his credit card without misusing it.

Xaden worked till late at night all alone in the whole building, drinking in his cabin. He loosened his tie, roamed around, cursed, and screamed. He was mad at himself for not being able to be what Hazel wants.

He saw his messed up reflection in the glass wall. The only thing he was able to see is a loser who failed in everything at once.

He thought he failed to be a good brother, a good son, and a good person.

The drunk man went towards the table and started searching for his mobile, spilling a drink on the papers mistakenly. A frustrated groan left his lips.

Soon he found his mobile and sat on his chair. He dialed a number and brought the mobile to his ear.

" Hello?" He heard his mother's sleepy voice.

"Can you hear me, mom?" He asked taking a deep breath.

" Y-yeah, Xaden, I can. Where are you?" Anna asked realising she slept waiting for him.

" I'm lost. I'm so lost, mom." Xaden's voice broke.

" Xaden? Are you drunk?" Anna asked sitting up.

" I lost her, mom. I lost her." He bit his bottom lip. His chest started to move heavily as he tried to breathe.

" Xaden, what's wrong? Who are you talking about?" Anna asked concern fully.

"I really love her, Mom". He started crying. "Why does it hurt so much? Please tell her... tell her not to hate me." He pleaded.

" No one hates you, we all love you." Anna said hearing him sniffing.

"You are lying. Reed hates me. Edwin hates me. Dad, Alice, Jane, Hazel... Sh-She too. She loves that Ian." Xaden complaint between his sobs.

" Xaden." Anna cried placing her palm on her mouth finding herself so helpless.

" Look, I hurt you too. I hurt everyone I love. You are crying because of me now. I can't make you any sadder." He put down his mobile on the table and rested his head beside it hearing his mother's weak voice.

" You are okay. Do you hear me?" Xaden only nodded, his cheek was pressed against the papers spread on the table. " You know your Mom loves you right?"

" I love you more." He mouthed. feeling his wet eyelids heavy before the alcohol took control over his senses and the darkness consumed the broken soul into it.

• All the clouds in me are raining.

Chapter Published On: 13 March 2023.

⭐ Do vote.

I read somewhere " no tears in writer's eyes while writing, then no tears in their readers' eyes while reading"

Anyone cried??? because I did ಥ⁠‿⁠ಥ