Uriah

He was holding someone's hand. More precisely, someone was holding his hand because the other hand was much larger than his. What really mattered to him was the warmth he was feeling.

But who was it?

Uriah glanced up. The sun shone glaringly and the intense brightness made him squint his eyes. He couldn't see very well, but it was a woman with long hair.

He hardly noticed the corner of her lips curving up a little as she said something to him, but he couldn't quite catch it. When she finished talking, she turned away and pointed a finger in front of them. Uriah's gaze was led by her.

It was a field of flowers.

She started walking, pulling him along. The roads, the flowers and the scenery; they were all familiar. It was the path to home. Even though he couldn't recognize certain things like the wooden bridge where a stone bridge now stood and the huge apple tree that he only remembered from the past, it still smelt of nostalgia.

Before Uriah knew it, he was now sitting under the shade of the apple tree with the woman crouching down a few steps away from him. He stared at her, as she returned with white and blue flowers in hand.

He watched her nimble fingers folded and tied the flowers into a flower crown. It was like magic happening in front of his eyes. Everything went really slowly, but he never took his eyes off her.

She placed the flower crown on his head and planted a kiss on his forehead.

"Life is never fair, Uriah, and you might not always get what you want. But remember, to be able to live is already a blessing itself. So promise me just one thing. Live the way you want to, and don't ever come to hate the life that was given to you."

She smiled at him. This time, Uriah could see her face clearly. Then she stood up as everything stopped. The wind wasn't blowing anymore, there were no birds chirping and the serene summer atmosphere was broken.

And she was gone.

That woke him up. Her words and her voice in a soft whisper like the wind. The way she had disappeared just like that.

The familiarity was too much. It wasn't his first time having this dream, but somehow it felt a little different than usual. It was the fact that he could see her face much clearer than he did for the past years. Her smile was pained unlike the uncaring one he had always seen.

Uriah sighed. "Mom..."

Jasmine

"Here's your flowers and thank you for coming."

Jasmine glanced down from her seat on the second floor to the counter where the voice was coming from. Uriah handed a bouquet of camellias to a woman in her mid-fifties and they were both smiling at each other. It was a nice sight to see.

This was her fourth visit but it was the first time she had come across Astilbe in such a busy state. Jasmine had been sitting here for two hours, drinking her second cup of tea ever since she came in. He smiled apologetically when he told her he had work to do.

Well, it wasn't like he would be free every single time she came. No big deal. It wasn't bad to just observe him anyway. Even though he was only 20, he seemed reliable enough handling the shop. From walk in customers to phone calls orders, trimming the flowers to preparing the tea, taking in stocks and personally delivering orders. He did everything alone but smoothly.

Was she bothering him then? Perhaps there was no point in waiting and making him worry. She could come another day.

She stood up and walked down the stairs, but he was already down there waiting for her.

Uriah

"Sorry for the wait. I'm all done for the day. Do you want to join me outside or are you leaving now?" He asked upon seeing her walking down the stairs.

"Oh." She paused. "If it's alright with you, then I guess I'll stay for a little longer."

He nodded. "I'll be planting new plants today. I hope you don't mind being under the sun?"

She shook her head. "Sure."

And so they went out.

Jasmine

She watched as the seeds were carefully sown into the holes Uriah dug. He did everything in a slow manner, like he wasn't rushing or anything. It was pretty comfortable to watch. Everything went really slowly when it came to him. He looked as though he was never in a rush, and after all her life spent in a busy city, it felt refreshing to Jasmine to take everything slow.

Shifting her left foot a little as she was crouching on the ground and it was getting a little tiring, she tore her gaze away from the soil and up at him. He caught her staring again. Jasmine wondered if he had amazing sixth sense for him to realize so quickly.

Since he was staring back at her expecting her to say something, Jasmine spoke what was on her mind.

"So, why did you choose to become a florist?"

"Why not?" He smiled.

"Well, the obvious reason would be that you're a boy. I mean, florist are typically girls, aren't they?" she said. "But I do want to know. Your reason."

He looked down at the soil again, dropping seeds into the holes with the same smile still plastered on his face. She realized he was staring off space, deep in thought. Was it something sensitive?

"It makes me happy. Because I'm doing what I want to."

"Being a florist is your dream?"

That were both admirable and enviable. Being able to do what you want was something Jasmine could never achieve. It seemed like things were already planned out for her. Not just as if. Trevor was the perfect example of what were to come for her.

"Kind of. Though I'm keeping a promise by being one. That too."

Jasmine nodded, staring blankly at the soil.

She thought it was too personal to have him answer what the promise was about. Perhaps another time. If there was another time.

Uriah

"Can you pass me the watering can?" He pointed at the toolbox under the shed.

She hummed and got up, threading towards the object. Uriah wiped the sweat that dripped down his cheek with the back of his hand and went back to molding the soil, making sure it was not too compact or loose.

"Here," she held it out for him to take and crouched down again, hands going up to fix the sunhat he had lent her in case she was to get a heat stroke again.

"Thanks." He threw her a smile and started watering the sown seeds.

"So how long will all these take to grow? What are these?"

"They are irises. It takes around two months for them to fully grow and bloom, just in time for spring."

"Two months' a pretty long time."

"Yeah, they take quite some time to grow, yet wither a little too quickly, don't you think so?"

She hummed in agreement.

"Exactly like life." He said. "Takes too long for us to finally realize what's important and before you know it, life ends just like that."

"At least a flower has the chance to bloom."

But there were so many things that would hinder a flower from blooming. The weather, for one, was too unpredictable and could easily destroy what little life a bud had. And then without proper care, it would die while it was still growing, halfway through everything. And sometimes, the insects, mites, ants. They destroy you from the inside out.

And a flower can only stay at one spot. Unable to move, caged down. Not in control of its own life.

"Little chance," he whispered.

Some flowers die before they were known.

What about them?

Jasmine

Her eyebrows knitted together. It was happening again. She wondered if he actually realized he was doing that.

It was like he had cut himself off from everything, suddenly a barrier stood between them. It had happened so fast, she couldn't really believe how and why. Oddly, it reminded her of Trevor. After few days of spending time with him, Jasmine had times when the thought would surface again and again. But she couldn't quite pinpoint in what way were they similar. But they just were.

The biggest similarity they held was their expression. When they suddenly just stop talking and moving altogether, yet their smiles never dropped. Always, always there. Like a safety mechanism.

It pained her, even though they had only met a week ago, and they were nothing more than just friends. The emotions were spilling out even if it was unintentional. She didn't like how empathic she was sometimes. Being empathic sounded like a good quality, but it gets tiring when you can't control what you feel from others.

"Are you okay?" She felt the words slip out of her lips before she could even process them. Bad habit.

She knew it was a stupid question, one that he or anyone else would simply shrug off. But it wasn't a typical, simple question that held no significance or whatsoever to her. It was pure, sincere concern directed to him in words.

Uriah

"Are you okay?"

He stiffened.

His façade faltered.

Okay.

He could actually feel the question like an arrow going right through him. It had hit the mark so accurately.

It had been so, so long since he had anyone ask him this question. Really. Who knew such a simple question could shake him up so much? People would only laugh at this very question that sounded precious to him.

Am I okay?

He hadn't thought about it. All along, he was okay. Always okay. Couldn't not be.

So he was okay now.

"Why wouldn't I be?" He mustered up a smile at her, not his best one but it was all he could manage then.

Jasmine

Even before the words left his lips, Jasmine knew he wasn't okay. He just wasn't.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Because," she pursed her lips together. Because it was like seeing a tornado from behind a veil. "You don't look okay."

At that moment, all she had wanted was to understand him, to know and get a glimpse of what lurked in the shadows of his heart. Maybe it was a silly wish. But she was silly enough to want to feel sad for him and want to share his burdens. Just as he was silly enough to hide everything and hurt himself in the end.

Uriah

He couldn't tell her. He wasn't stupid enough to not have noticed the pleading look in her eyes. It was tempting, but he couldn't.

When his mother had died and people told him it'd be okay, when his aunt who took him in kept asking if he was okay, and when her son, Jake, returned his toys -- that his mother had given him -- broken, he too, said that it was okay. He never really thought it was. But he couldn't tell them it wasn't.

It would make them a little sadder, if they did care.

But her concern didn't go completely ignored. To him, it felt like she was reaching out her hand from the shore when he was drowning in the middle of the sea. He could only look.

"Maybe I'm not," He whispered.

He watched her eyes glint with even more worry and he smiled.

At least there was someone.

Jasmine

"What did you--" She was cut off when he pressed a finger against her forehead. His touch felt wet and her nose tingled with the earthy scent. When he took back his hand, she reflexively reach out to touch her forehead, the spot between her eyebrows.

She glanced at him with a puzzled look as she finally realized that it was mud that had been smeared on her forehead.

"Don't frown, you'll get wrinkles." He let out a few chuckles. It sounded so light and cheery and happy -- nothing like the piercing sadness she had felt seconds ago --, it almost made her smile widely. But she held it back, instead letting a small smile ghost her lips before she faked anger.

"Hey! It's dirty!"

"Oops?" He looked away, faking an innocent look.

She dipped her fingers into the mud and leaned forward, wiping them across his left cheek.

She laughed. Three brown lines spread from his cheek to the corner of his lips.

"Eww!"

"Shouldn't you be used to the soil and mud already?"

"Sure, but not on my face!" He groaned playfully.

"You started it."

"I'll take responsibility to end it then!"

And with that said, they both ended up with muddy faces, lots of laughter and a shared memory that would last forever.

🌸🌸🌸

*peeks out from behind the corner* H-Hi. I'm back. Sorry for going missing for half a year. School was busy and I just didn't feel like writing.

But I promise I'll be here for some time, maybe a few more updates before I (possibly) go missing again. Not really suitable to announce that but I've made too many unfulfilled promises so I should just let you all know not to expect much :')

OKAY, ANYWAY.

Did you like the chapter? Is it too slow? Repetitive? Tell me what you think! :)