Chapter 26: From Now and Then

My head was aching. I groaned in pain and seems my world keeps on spinning. What happened to me? Hindi ko na alam kung ano ang nangyari sa akin. Pagmulat ko sa 'king mga mata, puting kisame agad ang bumungad sa akin. I roamed my eyes around until my eyes caught the man sleeping beside me, wearing a gray crew neck sweat and gray jogging pants. He was peacefully sleeping beside me. I stare his whole body. Bakit nasa tabi ko siya? Wait! Nasa parking lot pa ako kanina, ah? What the world going on?

Thalia and Phoenix boys. Ito agad ang unang pumasok sa isipan ko nang subukan kong alalahanin ang mga nangyari sa 'kin kanina. They're so hurtless. Nagawa na nilang wasakin ang buhay ko at agawin sina Mama sa 'kin, pati pa naman si Prince? Whatever will happen, I'll protect Prince. I love this man and there is no reason to give him up. Hinding-hindi ko siya isusuko kay Thalia.

Humarap ako kay Prince at nilakbay ang mga daliri ko sa buhok niya. Sa gwapo ng boyfriend ko, isusuko ko lang? No way!

I wiped the beads of sweat on his forehead. Inalis ko ang buhok na nakatakip sa kaniyang kilay at nilakbay ko ang mga daliri rito pababa sa tungki ng kaniyang ilong. My eyes landed on his kissable and pink lips. He's the most beautiful view I've ever seen.

"Love?" He mumbled but his eyes were closed. He's maybe dreaming. Agad kong tinanggal sa kaniyang ilong ang aking daliri at tumihaya pero ang mga mata ko ay nasa kaniya pa rin. Ayaw kong mahuli niya akong tinititigan siya.

"Gutom ka na ba? Ipagluto kita?" he asked and finally opened his eyes. I closed my eyes so that he can't see me. "Why are you closing your eyes? Gising ako simula kanina pa. Gutom ka na ba? May masakit ba sa 'yo?" Humarap siya sa akin at niyakap ako. He planted a kiss to my cheek.

"I was just tired," I said, while looking at his hazel eyes. He smirked and put the strand behind my ears. "Thank you for...for bringing me here."

Itinukod niya ang kaniyang kanang kamay sa unan at ang isang kamay niya naman ay nakayakap sa akin. Masyado kaming malapit sa isa't isa kung kaya't damang-dama ko ang mainit niyang hininga.

"Kahit gaano mo itago sa 'kin 'yang sakit mo, kaya kong alamin 'yan. Your eyes, your face and the way you act is kinda familiar to me. So don't act like you just met me yesterday." Ngumiti siya sa akin at lumabas ang kaniyang dalawang malalalim na dimples.

"'Di ba sabi ko sa 'yo, makikita lang kita, busog na agad ako."

"Nah! Whatever! Lulutuan kita," aniya at akmang tatayo nang hilain ko siya pabalik. "Bakit? Gusto mong yayakapin na lang kita palagi?"

Hindi ko na alam kung ano na naman ang pumasok sa isipan ko. All I need this time is comfort and his presence. I need someone to lean on. Even though I really wanted to tell Prince what I was feeling today when Thalia confronted me, there was still something inside me which told me that I shouldn't. Gusto kong sabihin sa kaniya na natatakot akong mawala siya sa 'kin pero palaging parang may harang ang aking lalamunan.

I nodded my head. "Be my shelter this night. I badly want your hug, Prince."

"What's bothering you, Love? Tell me. As your boyfriend, I have the right to help you. May karapatan akong damayan ka sa mga problema mo." He put his arm under my head and it serves as my pillow this time. "Kasi alam mo ba? You can't stand alone, you can't fight alone without the help of others. Because two are better than one. This is according to the Bible."

Have you ever imagined Prince? Sa yaman nila, katanyagan at kilala ng buong bayan, hindi nila nakalimutan ang salita ng Diyos? Pero...gusto kong tularan siya. 'Yong tipong kahit nasa malalang sitwasyon na, umuusad pa rin.

"Prince..." I called him.

"Yes, Love?" he answered in a husky voice. He intertwined our hands together, while his left leg was put above my thighs.

"May sasabihin sana ako." Sa oras na 'to, parang gusto kong ilihis ang nais kong iparinig sa kaniya dahil parang hindi madali para kay Prince kung sasabihin ko ito.

"Ano nga? Sabik na akong marinig, eh!" He played my fingers, squeezing it and rubbed in a circular motion.

"Kapag ba...makita mo akong may kasamang iba, magagalit ka? O, kung sakaling makalimutan kita, handa mo bang ipaalala sa 'kin ang lahat ng 'to?" Halos maluha na ako sa sariling tanong ko. Dahil takot ako na baka balang araw, magkahiwalay kami ng landas at mangyari ang mga kinatatakutan ko.

"I'll make love with you so that you will always remember me," he said and giggled. Hinampas ko siya sa kamay kaya agad namang sumeryoso ang mukha niya. "Joke lang, Love. Ang sama ko na kung gagawin ko 'yon sa 'yo. Whatever happens, I'll just make love with you kapag ikinasal na tayo."

"Can you answer me?" I asked him again.  Alam ko na iniiwasan niyang sagutin ang mga tanong ko. I'll just wanted to know if he will wait for me and I want to feel if someday... kung hindi ko man maprotektahan ang relasyon namin, at least I can protect Prince from those wrecker.

"Uh? Siyempre hindi ako magagalit kung may kasama kang iba. Unless, gumagawa kayo ng mga bagay na labag sa mata ko at sa Diyos." He breathed and pulled the sheet beside him and covered it to me. "I will not be jealous when you were with other guys. Because controlling you is a sign of unhealthy relationship. I will let you communicate with other people because I trust you. You won't make me cry, Sky."

"Please don't trust me. If ever you feel that I betrayed you, please... don't have courage to come up with me and asking for my explanation. I want you to go, to fly and find the better place for you." Mahinang wika ko sa kaniya habang nakatitig sa kisame. I eye-sided him and found that his brows creased. "You are always free, Prince. Kapag palagay mo, nasasaktan na kita, layuan mo na agad ako. Don't let yourself suffer just because you love me."

"Why are you saying like that? I chose you because for me, you are the best decision I've chosen. You're the best plan I made in my whole life. So, if I says I'll hold you, I will definitely do that. Because I won't speak without action. You know how I responsibly take my actions." Idinikit niya sa 'king tainga ang kaniyang mukha kaya sa tuwing dahan-dahan niyang binibigkas 'yon, parang nanuot na agad sa kailaliman ng utak ko.

I didn't mean that I need to break his heart. Hindi ko sinabi na sasaktan ko siya at dudurugin na parang paminta. He molded me and gave light to my way. He's the lamp which enlightened me. He who opens my eyes so that I will gonna appreciate myself and boost my confidence.

"If you think I am the decision you made—"

"I never regret of chosing you, Sky. Kung hindi man nakikita ng iba ang ganda mo, hindi mo na 'yon problema. Dahil hindi naman lahat ng tao, gano'n ang tingin sa 'yo." Parang piniga ang puso ko sa sinabi niya. I felt that my heart was still aching it is not because despite of my flaws and imperfections,  but because it is hard for me defend him against Thalia. Kasi ang bait niya, eh! Kahit anong oras puwede siyang lokohin no'n.

"Perhaps you have other dreams, Prince. Like... traveling around the world, chasing the sun, gaining for fans, and exalted like—"

"Kung may dapat man tayong pupurihin, dapat ang Diyos lang. We can't have the things we wanted to be without His guidance. Everything that we have right now is a grace and blessings from Him. He made them all and not us. So, who among us deserves to be praised? Isn't it He?" He pointed above.

My lips curved up at humarap sa kaniya. "Kapag ba magkalayo tayo, ako pa rin ba ang magiging laman ng puso mo?"

He nodded. "Of course, yes. I promise you that kung mangyayari mang magkalayo tayo, ikaw at ikaw pa rin ang pipiliin ko. Gusto kong iparamdam sa 'yo na mas masarap ang mga yakap at pagmamahal ko kaysa sa ibang lalaki sa paligid natin. Kung sakaling magkalayo tayo at magkitang muli, hinding-hindi ako lalayong muli sa 'yo at araw-araw kitang susundan." He winked at me.

"I love you, Prince." I kissed the tip of his nose.

He pouted while his brows meet. "Dapat sa lips."

"Binabawi ko na ang sinabi ko." Umiwas ako ng tingin sa kaniya at tinanggal ang kamay ko mula sa pagkakahawak niya.

"'Wuy! I love you so much, hunny bunch sugar plum!" He kissed my cheeks and suddenly I felt that my face becomes red.

Hindi ko mapigilang mapangisi dahil sa ginawa niya. Hindi pa rin siya nakuntento sa aking pisngi, dinampi niya sa 'king mukha ang kaniyang mainit na palad at pinaharap sa kaniya. He kissed my lips, while eyes were closed and said, "Simula ngayon at sa huling hininga, ikaw at ikaw parin ang pipiliin, mahal kong Levina."