CHAPTER FOUR.
no man's land

Pulling a pair of jeans and a sweater from her closet, Vienna rolled her eyes at the sound of George yelling. As much as she wanted to get off of Derek's trailer couch, mornings were unbearable with George and Izzie's constant shouting.

After getting dressed, she headed downstairs to make coffee and small talk with Meredith when the older blonde noticed Izzie approaching, "Hello, kitty."

"What the hell was all that shouting about, Izzie?" Vienna asked.

"He doesn't want me walking around in my underwear while he's naked."

"Well, I was walking around in just my sweatpants yesterday ━━ "

Meredith nodded, "And you looked good, seriously your ab workouts have been working."

"Thank you, Mer!" Vienna grinned.

The roommates decided to carpool together, arriving at the hospital together. Jumping out of Meredith's jeep in the parking lot, George stated, "You don't understand. Me gonads, you ovaries."

"Oh, that reminds me. We need more tampons." Vienna notified George.

"You're parading through the bathroom in your underwear when I'm naked in the shower."

"Can you add it to your list, please? Izzie asked.

"What?" George questioned.

"Tampons," Izzie told him.

Meredith nodded, "To the list, it's your turn."

"I am a man! I don't buy girl products! I don't want you walking in while I'm in the shower, and I don't want to see you in your underwear." George complained.

"It doesn't bother me, ok? Look at me in my underwear, George. Take your time. It's no big deal." Izzie told him as they made their way into the hospital.

"You are the first person they see in the morning. You say please. You say thank you. You apologize for waking them up." Bailey informed the interns as they were gathered in the locker room. Alex walked in late, earning himself a glare from the resident.

Bailey continues, "You make them feel good about you. Why is that important? Cause then they'll talk to you and tell you what's wrong. Why is that important? Because then you can tell you're attending what they need to know during rounds. And why is that important? Because if you make your resident look bad, she'll torture you until you beg for your mama. Now get out there ━━I want pre-rounds done by 5:30 am." She finished.

Alex walked up to Izzie, "Morning, Dr. Model."

Izzie shot him a glare, "Dr. Evil Spawn."

"Ooh, nice tat. Do they airbrush that out for those catalogs?

"I don't know. What do they do for the 666 on your skull?"

Vienna was pulling her scrubs over a black thermal top when Meredith looked at her and Cristina, "I'd better get good patients today. Yesterday I had two guys with colostomies who needed dressing changes every 15 minutes." She sighs.

"I'm gonna be in surgery. Today's my day." Cristina said as the two gasped.

"No shit?"

"On what?"

"Like I'd tell you two."

"What do you know?" Vienna questioned the curly-haired woman as she finished getting ready, clipping her pager to the waistband of her pants.

"I know that I was here at 4:00 and you guys didn't get here till 4:30." The Asian woman said smugly.

"Tell us,"

Cristina scoffed as they left, "No. I'm not the one who's screwing an attending."

"Cristina! I'm not screwing an attending." Vienna defended.

Meredith sighed, "I also am not screwing—" She gets cut off as they into Derek after leaving the locker room.

"You're here early."

Vienna smirked, "Bye, Mer."

♱

George, Vienna, and Meredith walked together through one of the hospital hallways, "So, can we walk around in our underwear on alternate Tuesdays, or you could see bras but not panties?" Meredith asked the male after he decided they needed house rules. "Or are you talking Amish rules ━━ because if you think you're gonna get Izzie or Vienna to cover themselves. . ." She trailed off, with a slight shake of the head.

"She's right. Good luck." Vienna shrugged nonchalantly.

"The amount of flesh exposed is not the point. You have to do something, It's your house." George said to Meredith.

"It's my mother's house." She corrected.

He groaned, "Meredith."

Vienna gasped, "Wait. Do you like Izzie? Is that what this is about George? You have a crush on Izzie so it scares you to be around her half-naked? Cause you'll get a ━━ "

"No! I don't like Izzie." He scoffed in disbelief, "Izzie, no. She's not the one I'm attracted to."

"Not the one. So, there is a one." Meredith said smiling. "Is it Vee?"

Vienna's head snapped over toward the two, "Is it me, George? I mean, no offense but I am not looking to date right now."

"It is not Vienna! This is not ━━ Look, there just have to be some rules."

"You three, get Karev and head down to Trauma. Shepherd needs you." Bailey ordered them as they crossed paths.

"Shepherd's in surgery."

Bailey shook her head, "He got pulled before he could start."

After retrieving Alex, they headed down to the ER where they were needed and saw the attending standing by a man lying on a gurney with stuff sticking out of his head. All of the interns look at him in shock as they look at him.

"Those look like ━━ "

Derek nodded, "Nails."

"Oh, that is so cool," Vienna said a little too loudly, earning a scolding look from Derek.

"I– I can't see my hands." The patient slurred.

George yelped, "Oh my God! He's conscious!"

"Breathe deeply George. You won't pass out." Alex said, voice laced with sarcasm.

Derek looked at the interns for a second, "Use 4 mgs of morphine. Titrate up to 10 ━━ You know what? I don't want him to move."

"I can't see."

"It's okay. We need you to be very still, Mr ━━ ?"

A nurse cut in, "Cruz, Jorge Cruz. He tripped and fell down a flight of stairs holding a nail gun."

Derek took his flashlight from his pocket and shined it in Jorge's eyes. "Somehow he managed to miss a blood vessel. That's a minor miracle ━━ Optic nerve's been affected though"

"Can you feel this?" Derek questioned as he slid something along Jorge's arm. "Numbness on his right side. What's our immediate concern?

"Infection," Vienna answered, earning an approving nod.

"Right. I want us to be pulling these nails out in the next half-hour. We need a CT."

"CTs are down."

Derek looked over in disbelief, "What?"

"They exchanged them out last night. Computer's crashed; have them back up by 1:00."

The attending scoffed, "Of course. What are our other options?" He looked toward the interns.

"An MRI?" George questioned.

"No!"

Vienna rolled her eyes, "He's got nails in his head, sure let's put him in a giant magnet. You want films from three axis points and a C-arm in surgery."

Derek nodded, "Excellent! You guys dig up the research and find out if this has ever happened before. Go on."

"My wife, my wife, my wife."

"She's on the way," Meredith reassured the man. "She'll be here soon, just stay calm."

Derek looked toward Meredith, "Stay with him, keep him calm, and look for changes."

"Ohh. I can't see."

Vienna was standing outside of the room when Jorge's wife came flying through the doors. "Where's my husband?" She asked tearfully. "Where is my Jorge?"

"Are you Mrs. Cruz?" Vienna asked after making her way toward the woman who nodded frantically. "Please follow me."

"Baby?" Jorge's wife asked as she entered his room.

"Zona?"

"You are in so much trouble." She said as she approached Jorge.

Derek looked at Meredith and Vienna, "Get a history from her before you two scrub in."

"Okay."

"Thank you."

"Will he be able to see again?" Zona asked Meredith and Vienna as the three of them stood in the hallway outside of Jorge's room.

"We won't know until the nails come out," Meredith answered apologetically. "It's hard to say."

"Did he tell you he takes photos? Beautiful photos. It's his hobby. I ━━ I just got him a new digital camera now he can't stop, you know ━━ he always has it out, always taking pictures of me."

Vienna smiled and nodded, "Jorge said he's been having headaches. Can you tell me about them? Do you know if they have been recent?"

"Um, ━━ I'm not sure. Maybe the last couple of months."

"Mrs. Cruz, have you seen him experience any dizziness or disorientation?"

"Yes, yes, I have." She answered as Meredith added that to the chart.

♱

"Vertiginous or light-headedness?" Derek asked Meredith and Vienna as the three scrubbed in for Jorge's surgery.

Meredith nodded, "Light-headed. Sometimes he'd have to brace himself to get out of bed."

Derek hummed, "Could be a million things. Simple orthostasis." Earning himself a weird look from Meredith. "What?"

"What made him fall down the stairs with a nail gun?"

"He said he tripped. Just because you hear hoof beats, don't assume zebras."

Vienna shook her head, "Something caused him to lose consciousness and fall down the stairs. He could have a tumor."

Derek sighed, "Look. I have no idea why this guy's still alive, let alone moving and talking. Not a clue. . . Let's just get him through this before we start digging around for something else."

As they started putting on their gowns, Derek got a call and approached the nurse who answered. "Shepherd. . . 23 cases?. . . Attempted suicide doesn't count. Talk to me about the procedure. . . Okay, got it. In other words, I'm on my own."

"Who was that?"

"O'Malley and Karev. There have been 23 cases of this ━━ now granted, one was attempted suicide ━━ so it doesn't count. Well, the best way we do this is to just stop the bleeding."

"As you can see, the patient has shot seven nails directly into the skull without doing significant damage," Webber informed those watching from the gallery above the OR. "Other than the optic nerve, and we may be able to save that. The idea is to remove the nails at exactly the angle they entered. Any wiggle, and we risk doing more damage than when they went in." He said as he removed the first one.

"One down," Derek began.

"Six to go." Burke finished.

Derek and Burke continued to get the rest of the nails out without causing any more damage. "Alright, way to go us. Good job, everyone. Thank you. It doesn't look like we made it worse, however, the big question is the optic nerve ━━ we'll know in the morning."

"Should we order the MRI?" Meredith asked.

"He needs to stabilize. We'll do it tomorrow."

♱

Izzie and Vienna are in the bathroom as George showers, the former upset look on her face. "We reminded you before you went," Izzie states.

George huffs and rolls his eyes, "I forgot when I got there."

"No, no. You were so passive-aggressive." Izzie scoffed, sliding the shower door open.

"Jesus!" Vienna yelled with wide eyes as she turned around at just the wrong time. "I really did not need to see George's junk."

"Naked. I am naked in the shower."

"They're just tampons, George. I really needed tampons. God!" Izzie scoffed as Meredith entered the bathroom, "I'm not riding in the same car with him."

"Unless you're going like that, you're not riding with me," Meredith says as she opens one of the cabinets. "Where are the tampons?"

Vienna looked at her, "George didn't buy them."

Meredith looks at them in disbelief, "You didn't buy them?"

"Men don't buy tampons," George says simply.

"You know what. You are gonna have to get over the man thing, George. We're women! We have vaginas! Get used to it."

"I am not your sister."

Vienna groaned, "Suck it up, George. Lots of men buy women tampons and pads! You know, my ex would buy me tampons and ice cream. I'd say be more like him, but he cheated on me. . . Be like him without the cheater part."

Vienna then left and drove herself and Izzie to the hospital, the two stopping on the way for coffee. The two women walked in a peaceful silence as they made their way to the intern locker room.

Upon their arrival, Vienna noticed George attempting to block Izzie's entry to the room. The shorter blonde walked in first to see what the big deal was, and when she did, her jaw dropped.

Pictures from Izzie's lingerie photoshoot that she had a year prior ━━ which wasn't posted until a few months ago, were everywhere. The floor was no longer visible, the walls were covered, and even lockers were covered.

"What the fuck?" Vienna exclaimed, catching Alex's stupid triumphant smirk. "Did you do this?"

Before he got a chance to answer, Izzie came into the room, resulting in every male in there applauding her. Vienna looked over at the other blonde whose face was mixed with both embarrassment and anger.

"Shh, shh, We have Bethany Whisper in our locker room." Alex laughed, "Oh, boy, I guess they do airbrush out the tattoo, don't they?"

"You want to see it? You really want to see it? Fine." Izzie takes off her coat, "Let's look at that tattoo up close and personal, shall we? And what are these? Oh, my God! Breasts! How does anybody practice medicine hauling these things around?" She asked sarcastically as she took her hair down. "And what do we got back here? Let's see if I remember my anatomy. Glutes, right? Let's study them, shall we? Gather around and check out the booty that put Izzie Stevens through med school."

"Have you had enough or should I continue? Because I have a few more very interesting tattoos." Vienna looked at Alex who suddenly looked ashamed of his actions. "You want to call me Dr. Model? That's fine. Just remember that while you're sitting on 200 grand of student loans, I'm out of debt." She finished before storming off.

Vienna shook her head as she looked over at Alex, "What is wrong with you?" The male stayed quiet, "You are such an asshole."

"What did I miss?" Vienna asked, walking up to Meredith after leaving the locker room.

"Jorge has a tumor." She sighed. "And they want to operate on it."

"No way!" Vienna exclaimed, "I want to cut someone open." She sighed.

Meredith stared at her weirdly, "You sound like Cristina."

"That is a compliment, actually. We should all be more like Cristina."

Outside of the hospital, Bailey's female interns were sitting on a bench talking with each other. "The woman's life was this hospital. It was her home. It's a sweet thing for them to do." Izzie says.

Cristina disagreed, "It's a waste of a bed, and it's a waste of my time."

"Who are we talking about?" Meredith asks.

"Liz Fallon. They brought her here to die."

"Wouldn't you want them to do the same thing for you?"

"No! You know what, I'd want the doctors to do everything they could." Cristina scoffed, "I'd want them to cut me open until the minute I die."

"Sometimes doing everything can be worse than doing nothing."

The Asian woman flipped through a Seattle magazine, "You are eight feet tall. Your boobs are perfect. Your hair is down to there. If I were you I'd walk around naked all the time. I wouldn't, I wouldn't have a job. I wouldn't have skills. I wouldn't even know how to read. I'd just be naked."

"It's makeup. It's retouching."

"You get that we hate you, right?" Cristina deadpanned.

Vienna shook her head starting at the picture, "I'm kind of loving you right now."

Izzie's cheeks flushed as her pager beeps, "Bailey again."

The shorter blonde was in the intern locker room putting her jacket on when she heard the door to the locker room open. Looking over she smiled upon seeing Bowie leaning against the doorframe.

"Heading home?"

The woman nodded, "I desperately need sleep."

Bowie chuckled, "Would you like to be on my service tomorrow?"

"Convince Dr. Bailey and I'm all yours."

"Consider it done."

Vienna grabbed her bag and made her way out of the locker room, "Goodnight, Dr. Warren."

"Goodnight, Dr. Clark." He smiled bashfully, tilting his head to the ground.

♱ word count 2711