【ＥＮＩＧＭＡ】

***

It hadn't always been like this.

The universe hadn't always been so cruel and horrible to Y/n, but she found that things clearly changed with time as she held up her hero costume. She had no idea what it looked like in terms of color. She had a basic idea of the way it'd shape her body, but—

"Damnit, where the hell is the front?"

She also had no idea how she was supposed to put it on.

When she had to send in her request for her hero costume, she told her parents she wanted something simple but cool, something fierce and intimidating. This didn't feel like that at all, but it's not like she knew what it should have felt like anyways. Her parents said in the end, they requested a black bodysuit with very obvious zippers so she could feel the front and back and some 'cool accessories'—she didn't feel the zippers anywhere.

The apparent front and back of the damn thing felt the exact same, and she didn't want to walk out there looking like an idiot for the second time in a row. ( Shortly after her first day— she'd come to find that multiple classmates had seen her with her gym uniform backward and were in fact, snickering behind her back. ) Although, that seemed kind of inevitable at this point.

They were doing hero basic training that afternoon. 

Combat battle. 

Physical battle on Ground Beta that required the use of Quirks. 

Y/n couldn't even bring herself to bask in the amazing warmth of the aura that All Might brought with him because she was so worried. 

Well, alright, maybe she did bask—but only for a few minutes. 

And who wouldn't take some time to admire sitting in All Might's presence? She'd never met him before then, she was so excited she could hardly continue to breathe like a regular person—much like Midoriya, a few desks down, who most likely ditched the entire concept of needing air in favor of rambling himself into a panic of excitement—which Bakugou quickly put an end to.

It wasn't like All Might was her idol or anything, she didn't actually have a favorite hero if she was being honest. 

But he was All Might. 

If someone claimed to not be amazed or at least wasn't able to appreciate how cool he was—they were lying to themselves. And so, yeah, she smiled dumbly at, quite literally nothing, but the sound of the large man's voice and found herself stuck in her current predicament with her stupid, confusing hero costume.

"Uhm... L/n—"

"Hi!" Y/n jumped, turning around to the sound of the voice, squeezing her costume tightly between her fingers. "Yes? Did you need something?" She was sure this person was Yaoyorozu. 

The only person besides Todoroki who got in on recommendations.

"Ah... yes. You're... you're holding my costume."

Y/n's lips parted and she pulled at the costume in her grasp, "Of course I am... How did that happen?" She mumbled, face heating in embarrassment as she swapped costumes with Yaoyoruzu and— oh. There the zippers were.

"Ah... When we were standing at our stations for our costumes... Well, you stood in front of mine and you just looked so excited..."

"I see..."

"But your costume is very cool! I really like it!"

Y/n pressed her face to the fabric of her costume, gratitude muffled as she turned to get changed. She was really proving herself to be less than capable at UA, and she didn't know what her issue was, honestly.

Maybe it was the overwhelming sense of power coming from her classmates—or just the school in general. It really was a lot, and she kind of felt like she cheated, being there with no knowledge of her own quirk. She had an immense amount of luck on her side and it seemed it wouldn't be able to help her forever.

She really needed to get it together.

Face twisting, Y/n settled in a corner of the locker room to change into her costume.

***

Y/n played absently with the zipper at the front of her costume as she made her way out of the changing rooms.

"I kind of felt embarrassed about mine at first, but ours is kind of similar, huh?" Uraraka cheered, fingers smoothing over the sleeve of Y/n's suit, "how'd you come up with the design without knowing your Quirk?"

A grin stretched across Y/n's face, "I left it in the hands of my parents," she said. "I know when my quirk is in use there's nothing on my body that I have to take off or fix to make more accessible and I'm typically in comfortable clothes, so I thought my hero suit shouldn't be anything too out there! Simple fits me the best,"

"Hmm... Oh! How do you know when your Quirk is in use if you don't know what it is?"

"Well. It's all a strange sense of just knowing," Y/n chewed on the inside of her cheek as she pondered for some kind of comparison. 

"It's like when... when you have a sixth sense for a moment! Either your intuition or gut, when you know something's going to happen or you have a feeling something will take place—I feel like that when my quirk is in use. I just can never figure out what it is, because when it is in use, so many things are going on, I can't exactly pinpoint it. And everything works so perfectly for me, I can't tell what I did by the end of it." 

Y/n tugged a little at the hairs on her nape, teeth sinking into her lip nervously, "I have no idea how that's gonna help me with the exercise, though..."

"It'll be fine! Things seem to work out for you perfectly, so this will be good and maybe you'll discover something more about your quirk?"

"Ah, you're right..." Y/n tried for a weak smile. 

Though Uraraka's cheerful energy was typically contagious—Y/n couldn't fall in line with it. The fact that things always seemed to work out for her, was really just some form of extraordinary luck. She was sure it's how she got into the hero course in the first place.

She could remember the almost stupid luck she had during the entrance exam: all of the giant machines they had to defeat to win points seemed to gather in her area. With a stumble of her feet, she'd accidentally hit a few robots the wrong way and— well she didn't know what happened once she tripped, but she collected points from that. And then accidentally pushing a few people out of the way when they were apparently two seconds away from getting stampede by bots— in reality, she had no idea where she was going and ended up bumping into a few people trying to get away from whatever was behind her— it's how she collected her rescue points. Everything was accidental, purely coincidental, and she was idiotically lucky that day— as it was in most cases.

Y/n paused in her thought, head falling to the side at the revelation: whenever her quirk was in use—there were exactly three elements that stayed the same.

Accidents, coincidence, and luck.

"Oh? Deku!" Uraraka startled Y/n from her thoughts with a cheerful call as she turned around to, presumably, face Midoriya, Y/n following suit, "your costume!"

"Wow!" Y/n pulled her lips, "It looks so cool,"

That typical nervous squeak came from Midoriya and Y/n just knew the boy was trembling in his skin. It was all over his energy. 

The shakiness, the sharp spikes, and unsteadiness.

Midoriya made a small noise, "That's kind of mean, L/n..."

Y/n laughed—she supposed from his point of view, it seemed kind of condescending, but really, she just wanted to feel included.

"Sorry, sorry," Y/n stepped forward, voice a bit crazed as she jumped up and excitedly asked, "Can I feel it, then?"

Midoriya squeaked again, "You— you want to—?"

"Feel it, please!" She stepped closer, wiggling fingers reaching for his arm, "I can't see it so I want to see if I can kinda get the concept by feeling—what are these?" 

With tight lips, Y/n pulled at the—ears— at the top of his head. She held a laugh bubbling in his throat; Midoriya really was cute. 

"It's like Uraraka said: feels very down to earth, like you."

"Thank—thank y—thank you?"

Y/n smiled, then turned on her heel, abruptly thinking of Bakugou.

She wondered if his costume was just as terrifying as he was. Maybe as explosive as his personality and quirk? It actually didn't take long to find the teen in question. 

With just three steps forward, Y/n's shoulder was checked to the side roughly, an irritated, "Watch it," being followed by the bump.

Y/n clicked her tongue, crossed her arms over her chest as she turned to follow wherever he was headed off to. 

"How many times do I have to tell you I can't?"

"And how many times am I gonna have to tell you that ain't my problem?" Bakugou stopped in his movements and Y/n could tell he turned to face her. There was a sudden pause— a moment where Bakugou's energy spiked confusingly, Y/n couldn't name or recognize the way it did a sharp 180 from the way it usually surrounded him, and she decided he was probably just confused, considering his next words.

"What the hell are you wearing?"

Heat rose to Y/n's face and she quickly blurted— "Same thing you're wearing!"

There was another pause and whatever emotion it was that had Bakugou's spiking the way it did before was not confusion, because confusion was what he was currently displaying at her words. He shifted, probably crossing his arms over his chest.

"No," He said simply. "You're wearing a stupid bodysuit with way too many fucking zippers and I'm wearing some badass gear."

"I mean we're both wearing our hero costumes. And listen: I have to have this many zippers. If I don't— it'd be a repeat of the quirk assessment test," She tugged at the zipper at her chest for emphasis, and stepped closer to Bakugou, holding out her hand excitedly, "But anyway, can I touch you?"

"I— what the hell?"

"Not like anything creepy, you dummy, I meant your costume. I wanna get a feel for the concept, you know?"

She stepped even closer and placed her hand on his arm. His bare arm. 

Bakugou turned his head in her direction to probably stare her down, maybe he was more confused than before because he wasn't speaking at all, and Y/n raised a brow in similar confusion, moving her hand up, smoothing over his bare shoulder. 

She raised a brow, taking the chance to poke fun at him.

"Are you naked?"

"What the— I'm not fucking naked— are you an idiot?" He grabbed her hand in his with his retort, which was actually gloved, the sound of heavy, shifting gear sounding in his ear, and placed it on one of his arms, apparently. "I sweat a lot with my quirk. I'm not gonna wear sleeves and shit for my costume, that's disgusting."

"Oh... What is this thing?"

"A gauntlet."

"A gauntlet, huh?" She ran her fingers across the large, patterned thing on his arm, "it feels like a turtle's back to me. It's also really big. Is this is on both arms?" Y/n's lips pulled to the side as she reached for his other arm, the same large gauntlet thing encasing it. 

She couldn't fight her laughter, "this definitely suits you. It's so dramatic, kind of ridiculous, actually... Ooh, what about your mask—?"

Bakugou yanked his arms away from the girl with a growl, and slapped her hands away from his face, the gauntlet making more noise with his movement. 

"Dramatic? It's necessary, what the hell are you talking about?"

"Yeah it's necessary but, I mean," Y/n laughed again, eyes tracing over the boy like she could actually see him. 

If she could, she knew her own gaze would be more judgmental and condescending .

She shook her head, "it's just so big and explosive and, like, attention-seeking. But it works for you, I think, so don't worry. You wanna be seen, right? It'll definitely do the trick, so you've got it right!"

"Do you want me to kill you or something! I'll set you on fire!"

"That's what it's like! The word: Boom!" She squeezed her fists, bouncing on the balls of her feet excitedly, "Boom, boom!— Like pom poms! Say— since you call me Lunchbox, can I call you pompom?"

Bakugou was seething. "I'm actually going to fucking murder you if—"

Y/n grinned, e/c silver-tinted eyes glinting, "Pompom."

All Might was calling for class to start before could get another shouted insult in and Y/n rushed ahead, pride swelling in her chest: she won.

***

Y/n's arms were held behind her back as she rocked back and forth on the heels of her feet, listening to All Might and his booming, exciting voice. 

It was so captivating and the more Y/n listened to him, the more she realized her statement about him not being her favorite hero was a lie, after all. He must have looked just amazing as he sounded and Y/n could only imagine his largeness and wide smile. From what she caught of the exercise—when she wasn't busy admiring the huge man's voice—it was like he'd already stated before, combat practice.

Seven groups of three and the teams would be decided by randomly drawn slots. 

And when they were, Y/n found herself smacking hands with Kirishima and Sero—they were team J. Kirishima was the one who called her "manly" the other day and Sero seemed like a pretty cool guy himself. 

They didn't seem at all bothered by the fact they were 'put with the blind girl' and they were also really powerful—she was glad she wasn't put with someone like Midoriya or Bakugou—on only the second day, they stood out the most; powerful in their own way and she didn't really know what she would do in that situation.

Ironically, they were competing against each other in the first team. 

It was Bakugou's team, consisting of Iida, and Sato, going against Midoriya, Uraraka, and Koda.

As the class separated, Y/n reached out a hand to grab at Bakugou's wrist.

He was off.

Something about his energy was inconsistently familiar, spiking in a way similar but also kind of different to Midoriya's when she had first met the ball of nerves. 

Was he... 

Well, she couldn't figure it out, but something was clearly wrong with him and the match.

He clicked his tongue, snatching his arm away, but Y/n simply offered a thumbs up.

"Pompom! I'll be cheering," She winked, "You on!"

"Don't call me that, I'll kill you."

"Go, go, Pompom!"

"Die!"

***

"So who do you think is gonna win?" 

Kirishima spoke beside Y/n, the grin was obvious in his voice. 

"Bakugou finished first in the entrance exam and Iida's pretty good, too. And Midoriya also has a really manly quirk, but when he used it that one time, he kind of got hurt, right? So it's hard to tell, isn't it? Also, you're facing the wrong way, the screen's behind you."

"Am I really facing the wrong way if I can't see it?" Y/n sighed, turning on her heel despite her own words, and pressed a finger to her chin. It took her a split second to come up with her conclusion, "Midoriya will win!"

"You think so? What makes you say that?"

"Mmh, well... I just feel like I know." It wasn't a complete lie.

Y/n was aware of Bakugou's chaotic, spiking energy when his match against Midoriya was announced. It was terrifying, unstable, and she was hit with twice the amount of, what she was able to label as, overpowering insecurity from Bakugou at that moment than when she had first met Midoriya. 

It was clear he wouldn't be thinking very rationally at all during the fight. Considering the little information she knew about the two and their relationship: how they knew each other beforehand, and something happened that turned their relationship sour. Or maybe things had always been that sour, she wasn't sure.

Either way, it was competitive. The hate and anger could be mistaken as one-sided, and the motives between the two were different.

Bakugou's main focus was proving something to Midoriya, whose main focus in return was simply completing the task at hand and winning the exercise; proving something to Bakugou was most likely an afterthought. Bakugou would basically be fighting a one-sided battle if he was going to be as dumb as Y/n predicted, thus resulting in Midoriya coming out on top.

She didn't say any of that out loud. 

She replaced her internal thinking and said, "did Bakugou seem a bit angry to you before the match?"

"Isn't he always angry?" Sero laughed from beside Kirishima.

"Yeah, but L/n's right, he's got a whole thing with Midoriya. Some kind of grudge; they knew each other in middle school so something must have happened. I can't imagine Midoriya doing anything that could make Bakugou hold such a large grudge, though, you know?"

"$250 says Midoriya didn't do a thing!" Y/n perked up, "Maybe it's a misunderstanding, but it's pretty tense between them, to be just that. So that would be kind of stupid."

"Right? So, what's Bakugou saying?" Kirishima shifted, probably getting closer to the screen. "Can't tell with the ceras in a fixed position and no sound."

"He's talking to his partner over the small wireless radio!" All Might explained in his typical animated voice, "You can bring that— plus the building's floor plan and this capture tape! Once you wrap this around your opponent, it shows you've captured them!"

"So, so," the excited voice belonged to the girl Ashido, she seemed to be good friends with Kirishima, "the time limit is 15 minutes and the heroes don't know where the nuclear weapon is located, right?"

"Yes!" All Might practically physically sparkled with the single word.

"Whaaat! The heroes are clearly at a disadvantage here!"

"Heroes should be able to turn the tables on whatever predicament they're in! Besides, didn't Mr. Aizawa tell you, too? You know, here we go—" his voice... Y/n gasped as she raised both arms, the entire class excitedly shouting All Might's classic and iconic catchphrase, "Plus Ultra!" 

Midoriya would have died, had he been there.

"Monsieur, Bakugou is—" At Aoyama's words, All Might hummed, assumingly turning back around to face the screen.

"Whoa, what the hell?"

Y/n nudged Kirishima's, "wait, what is it? What's going on?"

"What's happening is Bakugou looks pissed," Kaminari squeezed in between Sero and Y/n, getting close to the girl, "He's full-on attacking him. It doesn't even look like he's focused on winning the exercise— he looks real angry, it's scary!"

"Yeah, but Midoriya's holding him off! That guy's amazing!" Sero added, clasping his hands, "Look, he isn't even using his quirk! He's like, predicting all of Bakugou's movements, it's crazy!"

Y/n smiled, lips stretching wide across her face. She knew, based on her predictions which were nearly never wrong— Midoriya would be coming out on top— and she was wholeheartedly rooting for him, despite telling Bakugou she'd be cheering him on ( not that he cared what she did or who she cheered for; in fact, he'd probably want her to cheer for Midoriya, would force himself to win, and claim laughing rights if he got his desired outcome ). However, she knew with the energy radiating off his entire being: he needed humbling.

Really bad.

"Hey, isn't this supposed to be a class?"

"Young Bakugou!" Y/n raised a brow when she heard All Might actually cut into the battle, "stop! Are you trying to kill him?"

"What the hell did Bakugou do?" Y/n's head fell to the side. 

She folded her arms, trying to think about the two and their relationship—it was obvious there was more than what met the surface, and yeah Bakugou obviously held some sort of very strong grudge against Midoriya, but... what could it have possibly been?

"He blasted him with an explosion or something: I think his costume's designed to make the explosions from his quirk more powerful?"

"The gauntlets... they're probably storing something. I'm not sure how his quirk works, though? So I'm not sure what it could be,"

"Whatever it is—Bakugou shouldn't be using it this way—it looks really bad, sir! You should stop them, Bakugou looks really crazy, he'll probably kill him, actually!"

Y/n shook her head, trying to sort out her thoughts. There was no reason someone should be that defensive about their capabilities compared to a person— especially if that person was Midoriya. The fact that he could hold such resentment to someone like Midoriya in the first place spoke for itself. Midoriya, who would no joke, probably take any means necessary to avoid hurting a fly— somehow hurt Bakugou in a way that shattered his pride, fled him with insecurity, and inferiority. At that point, it was clear it only broke out that way because of some one-sided battle Bakugou had silently challenged Midoriya to— and he was, at least in his eyes, losing at his own game.

Dangerous. And irritating. Bakugou was irritating. She wondered how Midoriya put up with him for so long. Imagine being targeted by someone for a misunderstanding on their part?

Y/n's shoulders suddenly gave a violent tremble, eyes going wide—she had felt the shake of the building course through her body internally before externally and physically for everyone else. 

There was a large rumble and with a yelp, she rocked to the side, gripping onto Kirishima's shoulder, the redhead letting out a shout of his own, "what was that just now!?"

"He doesn't look like the type to think," A familiar voice reached Y/n's ears: Todoroki. "But it looks like he's more subtle than I expected. Kind of smart."

"Oh that's nice," Y/n commented, "so, for the dumber ones in the room—not saying I'm one of them, just saying in case we have them— the hell are you talking about, exactly?"

"Yeah, what do you mean by subtle?" Kirishima wheezed out, "he looks like he's all over the place!"

"I mean, he changed the course in a blast that doubled as a smokescreen—and then did it again immediately,"

"Wow, so smart, Todoroki!" Y/n backed up, away from where she was standing between Kirishima and Kaminari to settle beside Todoroki. Or, at least, she tried to. She backed into him, feeling a rough, rocky wall against her back before hands were placed on her shoulder to force her to stand by Todoroki's side instead of directly in front of him. "Whoa, is that your hero costume or something? It feels kinda funny,"

"What?"

"Nothing—tell me what's happening right now!"

"Bakugou is," Todoroki said with a bit of reluctance and a hint of irritation, "I don't know how to put this. He's going after Midoriya on a personal grudge, that much I can tell. It doesn't look like the exercise matters to him."

"Yeah, this is completely unfair!" Mina called, "He could have captured him already if he was really focusing on the exercise!"

"Yeah, yeah, and even though Midoriya's pretty amazing, Bakugou's already a ball of natural instincts!" Kaminari practically groaned. "In terms of combat power, at least..."

"Midoriya's running away..." Todoroki muttered, Y/n's head falling to the side in response.

"Running away? That doesn't seem like something Midoriya would do, to be honest," she said, chewing on the inside of her cheek, "I mean he had something to prove to Bakugou—at least that's what I overheard with Uraraka. Maybe he's trying to plan something."

"L/n's right. something's strange. It... Wait what are they doing? All Might, sir I said this looks bad!"

"What's happening?"

"They're going after each other," Todoroki informed, a bit of interest in his voice. "Midoriya's using his quirk for the first time in this exercise and Kirishima's right: It looks bad."

"Isn't that gonna—he aimed it up?!"

"No way! He's too good!"

Y/n didn't know what exactly was happening, but Midoriya did something that had most of the class freaking out. She smiled to herself, thinking she'd get the rest of the remaining details from Midoriya himself, later. But for the moment, she practically glowed in All Might's loud and excited voice as he shouted:

"Indoor person to person... Combat Training... Hero... Hero team wins!!"

She was right.

***

Two rounds later, and it was her turn. Her team ended up having to go against Tokoyami— which she learned was a boy with a bird head instead of a human head; it made no difference to her, both humans and animals looked like nothing to her, but she did know a lot of animals were furry. And then Asui— who was apparently the embodiment of a frog with a long tongue, and then Ojiro— he had a tail.

They were going against a team of mutants as incredibly normal, but maybe slightly above average stealthy people. (Not) easy enough.

"Alright," Y/n placed her hands on her hips with a broad grin, "what's the plan, boys?"

"First things first—!" Kirishima called, "You should probably be facing us while we have this conversation, I think!"

Y/n coughed, swiveling on her heel to face Kirishima and Sero as she tugged at her ear. 

She was most likely feeling overwhelmed. She typically always had a good general direction of where everyone and everything was, and twice in the same day: her senses were all over the place. Maybe it had to do with focusing so intently on Bakugou and his unfamiliar energy. 

Y/n simply shrugged the matter off as well as she could and paid attention to what Kirishima was talking about.

"Sero's tape is really tough and hard to get through, so that's good for defense, yeah? And I'm pretty stealthy, I won't waver— it'll be good enough to hold 'em back! Y/n, we don't know what you can do yet, and that's okay! But I know you're real nice at pulling things off and we're pretty set, so let's all do our best!"

Y/n was pretty sure she felt her eyes sparkle involuntarily at not only Kirishima's leadership and words of encouragement. She was almost positive whoever landed on her team would feel like they were at some kind of disadvantage, but both Kirishima and Sero seemed to almost forget she was blind. Like it wasn't anything they had to worry about and that, on top of the fact they also brushed off her not knowing what her quirk was... Y/n smiled with a nod.

"Okay!" She raised her fist into the air, curling her fingers into her palm tight. "We can win this thing! Let's get into our role—" Y/n paused, quickly dropping to her knees to press her palm against the cool floor.

"Whoa, you okay L/n—"

"They're here," Y/n mumbled, getting closer.

"...They are?" Sero bent down beside the girl, tapping his fingers down, "How can you tell?"

Y/n bit the inside of her bottom lip. It was an embarrassing answer— or, maybe pathetic, if anything. She sighed, getting closer to the floor— she could just feel it. The energy, the feel, the vibrations almost— they were there. Y/n pulled away, "I just know."

It was quiet and Y/n parted her lips to maybe pull some slightly better bullshit reason from her ass before Kirishima spoke. 

"Alright," he said. "I trust your instincts so how about this: You and Sero stay here and defend—I'm not sure if they'll all attack at once and in terms of defense and stealth: I'm the best so I can hold them off for a while. At least enough to warn you guys that they're coming—you both have your plugs on, right?"

"Yes!"

"Yeah!"

"Great, L/n: if you have any more information you can give, I'm not sure what, but just tell me, alright?"

Y/n nodded and experimentally added another palm to press down against the floor, shoulders shuddering. 

"Someone's coming on their own?" Y/n frowned; she wasn't even sure how she was both receiving and understanding the information. "It's—two are behind and someone with a really big energy is—Tokoyami's on his way up!"

"Whoa, whoa! Okay, so they're already up here—agh!"

"No way, they took the immediate offense?" 

Y/n jumped to her feet, taking a few steps back. She needed to get enough control of both her panic and herself to assess the situation properly and be able to get an idea of the scene taking place. If she could properly place each energy of a person to where they were accurately enough—she could feel their movements enough to defend herself and their weapon.

"Dark Shadow's out!" Sero called, activating his own quirk, "Kirishima, I'll get Dark Shadow and you try for Tokoyami!"

"Got it!"

Kirishima was to her left, there was someone else, though, and Sero was... where was Sero again? Wait—he was the one to her left, Kirishima was to her right—

"Ugh! Focus brain, focus!"

Y/n pressed her palms to her ears tight, getting rid of any sound around or shouting taking place in the room at the moment. 

She just needed to feel. 

She could feel things well enough that she didn't need to see—that's what she was good at; that's what she could do and that's where she needed to start.

She needed to breathe. Inhale, exhale. 

Focus on the energies. 

Locate each person.

Kirishima ahead of her and to her right, Sero: to her left just a few inches in front of her—the two overpowering energies were Tokoyami and Dark Shadow: That took care of four general ones she felt. They were obvious and they weren't hiding unlike the others she was struggling to locate. 

One was traveling and—

It was coming closer.

Closer and to her. Y/n, in a momentary state of panic, raised her hands and pushed whatever—or whoever—was coming her way to the side. Hard enough that they made contact with the floor in a dull 'thud.' Y/n gasped, turning her head down toward the small sound of pain.

"Oh—did I do that?" She asked aloud, bending to the person she just literally pushed over, "Sorry! Are you okay?"

"Ugh, how did you know I was coming?" Ojiro. Which meant Asui was getting ready to come around soon, probably even sneakier. When she confirmed it was the enemy, she threw herself forward to hold him down, left knee pressing against his tail, "Gah! What the?"

"Sorry," She instinctively apologized again, "but I have to hold you down."

"By laying on me?"

Y/n pursed her lips. "Well, I think it's a good move. Not gonna wrestle with me, are you?" She said, pulling the tape from where she had it wrapped around her middle finger. "Cause that would look pretty dumb, right?" 

Ojiro sighed like he was contemplating, considering, and weighing his options. Honestly, he could probably overpower her, but - it was most likely the way the rest of his team had faired that was getting to him.

Y/n sighed. "So. Do you mind if I tape you up, or are you gonna struggle?"

"I'm..."

Y/n bunched the tape between her grip and straightened it back out with a quick snap, pressing her knee against his tail harder.

"You're...?"

"Ugh... Tape me."

"Got him! Sero, get Asui!" Kirishima shouted at that moment. Y/n smiled, confident enough that her teammates could handle the situation as she tied the tape around Ojiro's wrist, and even twisted a cute little bow at the center. 

She gave him two taps on the tie and sat back.

"There! Now you lost with a bit of style!" She declared. "It's a cute loss!"

"L/n, give the guy a break."

***

The rest of the day was pretty lackluster after the class with All Might.

The number one hero was as cool and amazing as always, dashing off as fast as he could at the end of class with nothing, but a puff of smoke trailing behind him. Midoriya wasn't able to return, even by the end of the class, because of the injuries he sustained during his match with Bakugou (that jerk).

Speaking of.

Y/n hadn't spoken to Bakugou the entire day. 

One:  she was mostly caught up with Kirishima and Sero, the three gushing and bragging about how cool they were when they won their match (they were extremely cool and found themselves repeating all of their actions dozens of times for different people in the class who apparently couldn't get enough of their 'unwavering stealth' it only inflated Y/n's ego and allowed her to make friends). 

Two: he just wasn't at all approachable.

The air around him was deathly sharp and unpleasant, to the point it actually irked Y/n every time she even turned in his direction. And he'd been like that since after his match. When he returned to class, he was off entirely. 

As they were going over the results, even through the next match Y/n couldn't really read his energy. It was powerful, but also an awful energy to kind of sit-in, she didn't want any part of it, but, whatever it was—Y/n wanted to talk to him about it. However, it didn't seem like it was any of her business, to begin with.

Which is why, when Midoriya returned to class and had rushed out of the classroom once he heard Bakugou left immediately, she was one of the girls who rushed to the window to 'see' what they were talking about, Uraraka at her side.

"What if Bakugou tries to kill him again!" Uraraka said, voice a little too animated for those words. "Ooh, it looks like Midoriya's being nice, though..."

"Of course he is! Midoriya's always nice!"

"Yeah, but it doesn't matter if Midoriya's being nice! Bakugou still probably hates him,"

"He's scary..."

"You're right—he looks angry again. He's probably yelling! He's so mean!" There was a gasp, "All Might's there, too! I wonder what they're saying?"

"Ah, crap! It's getting late, I gotta get home!"

"Aah, me too!"

The girls huddled around the window slowly dispersed and that was when Y/n pulled from the window herself, suddenly feeling the urge to talk to him. Or maybe yell at him. Or get answers from him— answers to questions she probably had no right asking in the first place, but when did that ever stop her?

She wanted to know exactly what Bakugou was feeling— wanted to know what it was about Midoriya that irritated him so much— what was it about him that could mess Bakugou up so much. Sure it wasn't any of her business, but then Bakugou shouldn't have made it so public in the first place.

Y/n practically jogged through the building, senses sharp as ever, enough for her to avoid every person and object and as soon as she got to the bottom steps, she froze. There were so many feelings and energies to process all at once, but Bakugou's somehow stood out to her.

He was seriously upset.

Y/n rushed past Midoriya and All Might, hurrying to Bakugou's side. He was already making his way down the large-lane street; it was empty and quiet and only the sounds of their feet and low-chirping birds were heard.

Y/n stopped in her steps and Bakugou continued, obviously set on ignoring the girl. He probably didn't want to talk to any more people about today, but she called for him anyway,

"Bakugou—"

"Leave me the hell alone."

"Wait, but... I have a question," She hurried behind him, reaching out to place a hand on his shoulder, which he slapped away with an irritated noise.

"Don't fucking touch—!"

"What is it about Midoriya that bugs you so much?"

"What." His steps stopped and Y/n could hear him take in a shaky breath, "are you kidding."

"No, not at all. Seriously, you're all over the place. Like, a mess when it comes to this one person. I can feel it in your energy, I can feel your spikes and uncertainty—your insecurity is almost as overpowering as his, actually—"

"Shut up." There was shifting and Y/n could tell Bakugou had turned to face her. He clenched his teeth, a low growl of frustration bubbling in his throat, "what the hell are you even here for?"

"I wanted to... talk to you?"

"No. What the fuck are you doing at this school?" He corrected, surging forward, energy spiking violently. "What's your stupid goal at this place? Why are you trying to become a hero?" 

That was a sudden and actually kind of random question, especially considering the circumstance. Y/n crossed her arms.

"Well," A smile tugged at her lips, "wouldn't you like to know."

Bakugou tensed, ignoring the joking tone Y/n was trying to set for the conversation.

"Whatever. It doesn't matter to me—just, whatever your reason is probably makes it so you wouldn't get my reason: cause I'm here to become the best."

"Okay," Y/n blinked, waited. There was nothing. She could feel Bakugou staring at her and she was blinking owlishly at nothing. Y/n tugged at her ear, "is that it?"

There was a tense silence that followed before Bakugou huffed.

"Yeah, it is. I want to win. I want to be the strongest and I want to be the best. All of those things are what makes the number one hero and that's what I'm gonna be. Between heroes and villains— the heroes are the winners and the villains are the losers. Whoever's at the top can conquer anything— they can beat anything 'cause they're the best with the top strength. Like All Might. All Might never loses and—"

"Wait, what's your reason for being a hero?"

"Are you deaf too now!?" Bakugou actually lifted a foot to stomp in place. "I just told you— I'm here to be the best!"

"No, no I heard that part. I guess I'm just a little confused. I mean with that logic, of course, you hate Midoriya, he's better than you." Y/n's head fell to the side, eyes narrowing as she got close to the teen. 

Genuine confusion morphed her expression, spreading across her mind as she tried to understand Bakugou. His words, reasoning, goals, motives—all completely contradicted Midoriya's. 

"You're becoming a hero for something as simple as heroes are the winners and villains are the losers."

It was quiet for a moment.

"I'm... I'm really confused, now that I think about it— if villains were the winners— who would you side with, exactly? What else is there to your motivation to become—"

"Don't be an idiot. It's not like I don't have a conscience. If the villains were winning and killing innocent people while they were at it— I'd have to be the best and beat them all."

"Because that's what All Might would do, right? And All Might's a winner," Y/n shot back, scowling a little. "This is... actually kind of sad if I'm thinking about it. The world's kind of... failed you, hasn't it? I mean— you're the... embodiment of privilege— you're drenched in it. You're amazing, everyone thinks so, we said that during your match with Midoriya. Your natural instincts and strength and quirk— you're naturally smart, naturally a logical thinker, you're advanced and gifted and you're more than capable of becoming the best, obviously. But here you are actually suffering because you were faced with something you couldn't immediately beat."

"I'm not suffering!" Bakugou shouted back. "I'm—frustrated—of fucking course I am. You would be, too, if you weren't such a loser who's here to play games! That's not what I'm here for, so I'm not gonna sit here and feel sorry for myself!"

"Oh, I'm not saying you should," Y/n placed her hands on her hips, tilted her chin a little, "but I certainly feel bad for you."

"What. The hell."

"I don't mean it as an insult. I just mean to look at how much you're hurting because of your own inflated ego and suffocating pride. Being crushed by someone you thought was below you when your pride is as overbearing as it definitely hurts, and it's actually sad," She let out a small laugh. It sounded condescending and maybe it was, but, "I'm being serious. Your pride is obnoxious and ridiculous... That was an insult, you can take offense to that."

"Fuck off. At least I have pride and things to be prideful about—"

"Well sure, but it's fragile. And because of your fragile little pride still getting in the way of living your entire existence properly, your anger is directed at the wrong person. Don't be mad at Midoriya for being better than you when his motives are completely different from yours."

"Shut up! His motives are the same. Almost everyone here has the same motive— they want to be at the top! Deku said he wants to be at the top. He said he wants to beat me." With those words, it was clear he didn't care about the way she viewed him until it came to him being compared to Midoriya.

Honestly.

"And I'm sure he really does, but winning isn't what's fueling him as a hero. It's not fueling his lifestyle. In fact—Midoriya came rushing out here to check on you, to console you because he quite literally can't help it. He wants to become the best because if he's the best, it means he can save everyone. He wants to save people and with that fueling him to become a hero, it kind of makes sense why he's above you."

"He's not. Above me."

"Sure, he is. It's why you're all pissy, right?"

"That's not—"

"See, if this was a simple 'reassuring people, helping people, saving people' thing to you— you wouldn't treat Midoriya the way you do because heroes don't do that, do they? But that's not the side you're worried about," Y/n stepped closer, pressing a finger to her lip as she mused,

"You're not paying attention to how many people All Might was able to save from a burning building at once. You're paying attention to the way All Might was able to completely overpower that really strong villain no else could take on— and those are two sides that are always going to be at each other's neck because they can't possibly understand each other."

"What's 'fueling' us or whatever the fuck you're saying, has nothing to do with shit!"

"No, it does. It's the reason you think Midoriya's pitying you, isn't it? When you're down, do you really think competition is on his mind? It's actually—I mean holy shit, you piss me off so much it's kind of hurting my head—"

"Shut up, it doesn't matter! What matters is that I'm better than him! What matters is that I can prove to that useless, worthless scum that I'm better than him, that I can make him understand he can't compete against me— he can't stand on the same playing field as me because I'm better, I'm the best! Not him!"

"Do you not hear yourself right now? Don't you get how damaging that is to yourself?"

"Shut the fuck up! You're so damn confident that you got everything right, huh? We haven't even known each other for two whole days and you think you can analyze my fucking mind—"

"I have, haven't I? It's not hard— you're an open person, Bakugou. You wear everything on your sleeve and it's easy to tell what happened today shattered half of your pride and resolve and... Well, I guess even then, I still don't really understand you, I can't. Especially not this. You're so—"

"Then how about you hear about yourself, 'cause I can't fucking understand you either. What are you doing here? Do you even have a fucking reason? You don't know your quirk, you suck at everything you do, and you're not even trying to do anything about those things! It's like you have no goal! But here you are, trying to have me all figured out when you can't even figure out yourself.

"I've fucking watched you, you know. Like I said before, you're really just a big question mark, you have no idea what you're doing, no idea where you're going— you're fucking unsure of everything, and the only reason it doesn't bother you is 'cause you won't let it. You're focusing on me and my issues so you don't have to focus on yourself— you're deflecting."

"Aren't you doing the same right now?" Y/n raised a brow, face tight. "Sure, you've figured me out, but if we take away your, like, one reason for living— you're just as lost as me, aren't you? You know life isn't all black and white, right? There isn't a winner and loser for every situation— and when you're put in a gray area, what are you going to do then? Do you have any idea?"

Bakugou huffed, "I don't. Fucking. Care." 

With a growl, he seemed to turn on his heel, tugging violently as his clothes are bag or hair—something.

"I don't fucking care! All that matters is being the best—I'm not listening to your bullshit. Fucking lost? You're projecting and I'm going home."

Pompom.

The name was more fitting for him than Y/n originally thought. Big, poofy, like fireworks when they were in action—and so many strings, layers to get through and tear apart before finding the base. The small, lone base was nothing big or noticeable without its explosive attributes.

Y/n tugged at her own backpack, trying to force away Bakugou's jabs at her own character. Lost. A big question mark. No, she couldn't figure herself out— but she was trying to. She was trying to figure herself out in order to help people.

Helping others when one wasn't able to help themselves first was a sure path to disaster. And Y/n couldn't help but wonder if Bakugou was on that path.

***

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also someone gave me a funny idea: if this fic makes you cry at any point, you should take pictures and send them to my Instagram ( softbiscuiit ) so i can smile!! <33