To @KarenkateEspana, for still believing in him when all the rest of the world hate him...
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~~~ CHAPTER 28 - RESTRAINT ~~~

The wall clock in my room was the first thing that caught my eyes when I opened them. It was 5:00 in the morning and I felt the need to pee.

When I attempted to rise up from bed, I kind of bounced on it when I felt a movement in my left side.

What met me was Nigel who was sitting on that side of my bed. He was watching me while I was lying there!

"What the hell are you doing?" I cried out in shock as I sat up. There was rapid beating in my chest.

He didn't answer me. He just looked at me with those blank, sleepy eyes.

Being with him in the same room just brought me symptoms of panic attack. I could just maybe pee right now on my bed.

"What exactly are you doing here in my room?" I demanded, remembering our encounter last night... Didn't I tell him to leave me alone? So what was he doing here? Especially in my room? Actually in my bed?

"Can't sleep," he finally said, "I didn't mean to disturb you though." He was in loose tank top and shorts and all I saw were muscles... muscles in his exposed arms and legs... 

"Well, you have disturbed me already. Congratulations!" I retorted as I glanced my eyes away from him.

What was he doing in my room? My mind wouldn't stop screaming!

"L-let's talk... Althea. Let's have a talk," he said hesitatingly at first, but managed to become forceful the second time.

"Talk? We have nothing to talk about!" I said, trying to rise up from the bed. "And how did you ever come here in my room? You are not supposed to be here!"

"Well, I have a key to every room in this unit," he said, raking his hair with his fingers.

Oh, my God! How stupid of me to not know that he had a key to every single room here! That gave me another reason to have an episode of panic attack!

"Get out!" I yelled at him.

"When are you going to give me time to talk with you?" he said in plain placidity. "I just have something to tell you and..." he paused as he grasped his nape while bowing down his head, "and you're becoming really, really stubborn these days and you're avoiding me---"

"Avoiding you? Isn't this what you want? To get rid of me? So quit complaining! And, please, I don't want to hear anything from you!" I finally stood up at the other side of the bed across him, unintentionally showing him one of my oversized tee-shirts that I was wearing for sleep... and unintentionally displaying my thighs as well.

He also stood up and heat flashed in my cheeks when I caught him taking a quick look at my thighs. I promptly grabbed my blanket from the bed and wrapped it around myself, my hands holding its hemline.

I could still remember the feel of his hot palm on my thigh when I was under him in that couch in the palacio living room... and it felt so weird why I still had to think about it..

And of course, how could I forget the desiring gaze he was giving me on that night?

"You can't just come in here anytime you want!" I said angrily at him. I couldn't allow him to sexually assault me for the second time. "I am not talking to you anymore! Get out!"

He breathed hard as he stood there in front of me. "Just hear me out on this, okay?" he asked, looking irritated now.

Go, be irritated, you brute!

Still holding the hem of the blanket, I put my hands on my ears to show to him my unwillingness to listen. "I'm not listening to you... ever."

Truly irritated by now, Nigel strode fast closer to me, too fast for me, which made me drop the blanket in the floor due to my extreme surprise, especially when he grabbed my wrist and pinned my body back to the bed.  Quickly, he crawled on top of me! Both of his hands were gripping my wrists that were spread out over my head on the bed.

And, what was worse, I could feel that the hemline of my tee shirt was raised to my stomach which probably exposed my panties right now. I felt his bare knees and legs imprisoning my uncovered thighs. There was some kind of hot electrifying fire roaming around my whole body as I felt him on top of me.

This man here really exuded DANGER and there was nothing that I could do about it except to shudder under his muscular body.

"Control... Control, Althea," he said to my ear in a raspy tone. His warm breathing was fanning my neck. "Control... that's the hardest thing to exercise, princess, but hard as it is, you can count on me that it's what I've been doing all this time with you. You're my restraint, my one whole damn restraint, if you only knew that."

His words confused me that I had to blink my eyes for several times.

Bringing his face across mine, about two inches away, which made me conscious for I hadn't brushed my teeth yet, Nigel kept talking in the weirdest of tones, yet still with the raspy effect, "But that night in the palacio, I kind of lost it and forgot what restraint is. I've assaulted you but it will not happen again. It's hard but, yes, restraint it is... as always, princess." The tone of his voice sounded like a mixture of different emotions like regret, distress, tension.

And the scent of his breath... Why was it so fresh and clean and hot?

He held my gaze for a long time...

Wait, how dare he talk again about that night in the palacio!

No, it wasn't only about what happened on that unforgettable night. What really made me this person now was everything that he did to me since from the very beginning... all the heartaches he brought to my young, believing and hoping heart were all gathered in a big mass of pain on that night and became the reason of all the hatred I had for him.

It was so unbelievable that the man whom I loved since the very beginning had become nothing to me but a heartbreak. I couldn't even tell now if I still saw hope, future, or happiness in his handsome face. What I just felt was seeing pain, hurt, and anguish in him.

"Get off me now. I need to pee," I said coldly, trying to reject the heat I felt all over my body. "I said I need to pee," I said once again when he didn't move.

"Of course," he said, scrutinizing my face, but didn't move... for like an eternity.

"I'm going to pee on this damn bed right now!" I threatened him when he appeared to have no plans of getting off me.

"Control is the key word, princess," he muffled under his deep, rough breathing.

What was with the control thing that he kept on talking?

He then flashed me a sad look, exhaled one hot breath into my cheek, and rose up.

"Mom's coming today," he said before he left. "She'll be here by lunchtime."

Still lying on my bed, I sucked in a deep breath when he was finally out of my room. I instantly felt I no longer need to pee. All I felt was the sensation of intense heat all over my body.

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"So, what is it that you'd like to discuss about, Nigelito Joaquin?" mom asked after sipping her wine.

We were already finishing lunch and she ordered red wine for her drink. She had this belief on the good benefits of wine especially if drunk after meal.

The three of us were in the luxurious dining area of the condo building at the 37th floor. I actually didn't want to go but I couldn't say no to mommy. She said I shouldn't miss this Saturday lunch with her.

Nigel cleared his throat.

"Well, actually, mom, I've been planning to buy something and I'd like your opinion about it... and..." he started and looked at me before proceeding, "and Althea's thoughts as well."

He was planning to buy something and he needed my opinion about it? Was I even hearing it right? When did my opinion matter to him?

"Hmmm, that's interesting to hear. Buy what?" mom asked. She seemed happy upon hearing Nigel's words. "Sure, Althea and I will help you on that. Men really couldn't live without women's opinions, could they?" she teasingly asked, beaming at me.

I, on the other hand, was really surprised on the turn of events. This couldn't be happening. The great Nigelito Joaquin couldn't be this helpless to ask for my opinion on something... Was this what he wanted to talk to me this morning when he went to my room?

"Well, yes, we do need women..." he said, clearing his throat again and flashing red tints of color in his face. "It's just that I thought the condo is too little and old already for us to stay. I think, Althea would love it if we could move into a much bigger place... like acquire an estate..." Then, he seek my eyes. "I'm sure, you'd love it if we could have a modern version of the palacio here in the capital, where there is a pool, a yard, a bigger living room, a library, a bigger kitchen where you could cook, bigger bedrooms and, certainly, a patio with swings as well. What do you think?"

What?

There was tension in his voice but at the same time the way he talked appealed very sexy to my ears.

But, wait a minute, something in the pit of my stomach hardened. He was to acquire an estate where he could build a mansion and he was actually considering me on the design of the house?

Something that I would love? Like a pool, a bigger room, a bigger kitchen where I could cook? and a patio? with swings?

What was this for? How could he ever thought about purchasing an estate for me, for the most hateful girl on earth? What was he trying to imply here?

Well, I didn't know what was at the bottom of it. But, one thing was for sure, this brought a piercing pain in my heart because, right after that night when we had the biggest fight in history (especially now that I knew the fact that he could just easily come to my room anytime), I had already decided to move out... not too soon but later... when I would already be ready to bid my Mommy Carol farewell. I just wanted to live a life without him.

"That would be great, son!" mom exclaimed which actually interrupted my thoughts. "Oh, I'm so happy about this!"

There was again a piercing pinch inside my chest. Mom looked very happy with the news. Oh, how would I ever break to her the news that I was actually planning to move out?

After days of thinking, I had finally decided to just give up on him, on the engagement, because I had just grown tired of waiting and of this feeling as well. Anyway, it was very clear that Nigel wasn't really capable of loving me. Even if we'd live in a much bigger house together, it wouldn't still change the fact that he would just end up hurting me again and again... because he hated me... and hatred was something that couldn't just be rid of overnight... especially the kind of hatred that he had planted in his heart over the past years.

Until now, I still couldn't understand why he hated me that much and it was something that I had also given up to discover.

I didn't want to waste anymore my time thinking about it. I just wanted to move on completely.

Living in a much bigger house wouldn't also change the fact that I hated him.

Two people hating each other shouldn't be living under one roof.

"What do you think, Althea?" Nigel's voice woke me up from my reverie. "Or if you'd like another home design, it'd actually be just up to you."

Probably, if this happened months before, I would have jumped like a child, hugged him, and told him how excited I was to plan for the home design and transfer to a much bigger house. But this was happening today and it didn't excite me anymore.

"The condo is still fine with me," I expressed in the coldest possible way.

I heard mom's groan at my right. "Darling, aren't you excited to have a version of the palacio here?"

I bit my lower lip and shook my head.

There was disappointment in both of their eyes.

"So where do you plan to have this new mansion, son?" mom asked.

"At the Great Hill Estates, mom," he answered briefly.

I shut my eyes. There was a pinch again in my chest.

The Great Hill Estates was the residential place of only the elite people in the country.

When I opened my eyes again, I saw Nigel looking at me with his eyes giving me expressions I couldn't read.

"Well, yes, the condo has a sentimental value. I can't give it up just like that. We can still keep it, Althea, of course, if that's what you like," he said.

No, I don't want to keep it, Nigel. I just want to be in some place away from you... and, please, could you refrain from acting sweet like you care for me? It just doesn't suit you!

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Mom spent the whole month with us. She was busy the whole time. She went out early and arrived late. I learned that there were a lot of preparations done for the turning over ceremony of the CEO position to Nigel... mostly paperworks. Actually, for me, the turning over wasn't a big thing because he had been acting CEO already. Mom, who was the real CEO of the Corporation, was more of like a backup since she preferred to stay in The Fields all these years.

During the whole month, I managed to do well in my studies until the final exams by the end of the month. I was thankful that the second semester was over and, finally, I could take my summer vacation where I could stay away from him for a longer period.

If mom was busy, Nigel was busier.

But, he still found time to lock himself in his painting studio every Sunday.

Thinking about this artist side of him, it became weird to me anymore. I didn't have anymore the urge to want to see what his works were all about. I didn't know... maybe my heart just really got tired of everything related to him.

Hence, everytime Suzana would report important and even trivial things about him, I would always get irritated and always try to shut her up. He was my new pet peeve... and she started to become one, too. Suzana, like always, remained his loyal fan.

One day, with so much concern on my change of attitude and with so much hope that I would continue loving his beloved señorito, Suzana stared at me and asked me teary-eyed, "What happened to my sweet and patient señorita?"

Suzana's words hit me and slashed my heart into a million pieces.

I never answered her.

Locked in my room, my heart cried out for her and for myself too, as I realized how horrible I had become. But, I chose to be like this. This was the new Althea --- mean, horrible, nasty. This was the person that Nigel had made out of me.

Well, he taught me well enough on how to be mean. He was my teacher.

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During the past month, I became even much closer to Dylan. Trying to make me happy, he was always there to accompany Kara and me. He had finally finished his internship and was about to graduate this coming graduation ceremonies. I was happy for him.

"So, what's your plan after graduation?" I asked him when we were taking lunch in a restaurant. It was a weekday, last day of the final exams, and I was just submitting some papers to my Sociology Professor when we bumped into each other. He invited me for lunch. I couldn't say no to him.

"I guess, I'll be proceeding a Master's Degree," he said, smiling at me, you know, that signature angelic quirk.

"You're just obssessed with studying, I guess," I said, laughing at him. "Can you not rest for a while before proceeding your Masters?"

"No way! I have to strike this while the iron is hot," he said, very determined with his words.

I shook my head in disbelief. This guy in front of me was so obssessed with studying really.

"And maybe," Dylan added, "I could start courting you, if you'd allow me."

Hearing those words from him, I stopped laughing. "Dylan..."

"Will you be my girl, Thea?" he suddenly asked.

Oh, no! This was it! Dylan had really feelings for me!

"I was just trying to find the right time to ask this to you. Well, Kara's always there, you know, and thankfully I got the chance now."

I blinked my eyes. Did I feel something for him?

"Dylan," I said later after contemplating, "give me time to think about this, okay? Besides, you plan to do the courting after graduation, right?"

It was true. I wanted time to think about this. Decisions on love... and engagement... and marriage... must be taken with utmost consideration and pondering. It shouldn't be done impulsively... This was the biggest lesson I learned from my so-called engagement to Nigel.

"Yeah, sure, of course," he said, forcing a smile and then gulping something in his throat. "I just hope that you're finally over him, Thea. I'll be the happiest man alive when it happens."

I gazed at Dylan. Didn't he believe when I said I was over Nigel already?

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The evening for the farewell party for Mommy Carol being CEO and turning over ceremony of the said position to Nigel finally arrived.

I had the hard time of saying yes to mom about attending since I had negative feelings already on parties and balls. It just felt creepy thinking myself to be in a crowd again and be humiliated for the second time. I didn't want to endure the same thing.

But, how could I say no to her? How could I say no to the woman who was willing to give me everything?

Mommy and I arrived twenty minutes to the Sarmiento Corporate Building before the event. She said the event would be held at the building's social hall. She guided me to Nigel's office which actually occupied the 42nd floor. Mom was in an ivory full-length gown; I was in a red short dress. Both were designed by Stefano, mom's favorite. When mom asked me about my choice of a short dress on a black-tie event, I just shrugged my shoulders. Actually, this was my way of rebellion.

We entered Nigel's office. It was actually my first time to be in here. As I expected, it was very spacious and beautifully-furnished.

Nigel was there watching the view of the city enveloped by night's darkness yet flooded by lights, both still and blinking lights, through the glass wall. His back was facing the doorway. He was still not wearing his tux, just his white dress shirt.

"Son, here we are," mom called out to him. He turned around and our eyes met. I surrendered from our gaze first. Yeah, it was a short contact but it was enough for me to notice his well-shaven face tonight. Finally, he got rid of those annoying-yet-sexy hair on his face. What did I just think? Annoying-yet-sexy? What was wrong with me?

Mom and Nigel kissed each other's cheeks. I, on the other hand, found a couch to sit down.

"Oh, get yourself ready now, son. Wear your tux jacket now," mom said as she started to help him put on the studs and cufflinks on his shirt.

Later, taking a black single-breasted tuxedo jacket that was hung in the coat rack, she helped him wear it.

"I can do this myself, mom," he complained while mom was helping him put on the jacket, then his pocket square.

I tried not to mind them at all. I got my phone from my beige purse and pretended to be texting.

Then, a cell phone ring reverberated in the hall. Both Nigel and mom checked on their phones. It was mom's call.

"Yeah? Really? Yeah... Okay, got it... yes... I'll be there." She hang up then she said to Nigel, "I'll go ahead to the hall. They need me there."

I stood up to go out with her.

"Oh, we forgot something! Darling, will you please help Nigel put on his tie?"

I hesitated for a moment.

"Thanks, darling. I'll go ahead now. Both of you go down when you're ready," she said, not minding how I reacted and walking out of the office.

So it was the two of us which were left alone now...

Trying not to make a dramatic moment now, meaning trying to appear as cool as possible, I took a black tie from the rack to do what mom told me as if this didn't have any effect to me at all. When I stood in front of him, he pulled his shirt collar up. I raised my hands to put the tie around his neck. He bent his head down and our faces almost bumped into each other.

We stared at each other's eyes for seconds and I decided to not make an issue out of it. Then, his eyes travelled to my exposed cleavage and I swore to myself I was to slap him if he was to do something inapropriate right now. Thankfully, he averted his eyes at the sight in front of him but wetted his lips sexily. I could feel the heat in my cheeks all of a sudden. I closed my eyes for a second to get rid of those damn lips in my mind. What was the matter with me?

When I opened my eyes, Nigel was already straightening up his neck and what greeted my stare was his adam's apple which moved as he gulped something in his throat. I tried not to mind it again. I began to tie the piece of cloth with my fingers to make a bow tie and made loops. All the while, I tried my very best to concentrate on what I was doing and didn't look at his face a bit.

I was tightening the loops when he said, "The dress is too revealing... but you look very... beautiful."

Again, I felt the heat in my cheeks. What was with my blushing? Was it because it was my first time to hear him say I was beautiful? Oh, God, help me. Was this the great Nigelito Joaquin I was facing right now?

I just shot him a glare and continued with what I was doing. Whatever, Nigelito Joaquin.

As I made sure that I made the tying right, Nigel spoke again, "Thanks, princess."

God, he was acting really sweet to me... and he was calling me princess. Well, no, this wasn't true! I had to never forget that there was already an episode in the past that he had been sweet to me yet only to be mean afterwards. I was not going to allow myself to be caught in the same trap. No way!

Whatever, Nigelito Joaquin. Thank yourself.

"I'll be delivering a very important speech tonight," he said, smiling sheepishly at me, when I gave him a glance. "But, I'm nervous... for the first time."

I still didn't answer him as I adjusted the tie to my satisfaction.

"The condo really has a sentimental value but I'm still buying the lot, princess," he said, shifting the topic, maybe to get a reply from me.

Buy the lot yourself. I don't care.

Still not talking, I stepped back when I was done with what I was doing and went to the couch to sit and held the purse that I left there. As much as I wanted to go out from this office, I couldn't do it for I wasn't familiar with the whole building and I might get lost.

Nigel, after buttoning his tux, followed me and sat beside me at my right. I tried myself not to mind him.

"When are you going to talk to me?" he asked.

Oh, acting mute and deaf was hard but I could be awarded best actress for this!

"It's my birthday today," he spoke again.

The words hit me... big time! I was about to choke up.

Of course, how could I ever forget about it, dummy?

"I'm twenty-four now and you're not even greeting me. Usually, it would always be you who'd greet me first though you were there in the province... and you would annoy me with your texts greeting me 'Happy Birthday' like fifty times, you know, fifty texts coming from you on my birthday... It was always that crazy..." he stopped when he noticed I wasn't even reacting at all.

Leaning my left elbow on the arm rest, I closed my eyes and placed a finger in my left temple.

Annoying texts, huh? Always that crazy, huh? So why would you ask for my greeting when it was annoying and crazy? Go, greet yourself!

"Okay, never mind about my birthday," he retreated finally.

Just when I thought that he would stop talking, he spoke again, "Althea, tonight, I'm going to make an anouncement... a very important announcement... and I want you to know that I've already thought about this and I'm more than ready for this."

I knew he still wanted to say something but he was interrupted by the opening of the door. A woman who was about in her early thirties and who wore big-rimmed eye glasses walked in. "Sir, excuse me."

"Yes, Sonia?" he acknowledged her.

"Sir, everything is ready. You are now called to the hall."

"Okay, we'll go down now," he said.

I stood up immediately with my purse in my left hand and headed to the door. The great Nigelito Joaquin walked behind me. When we were finally in the hallway, he caught up with my strides so he was already walking beside me.

Later, as we walked side by side, I felt his left hand clasping my right. I was thunderstruck with his gesture.

No way that he was going to hold my hand!

I furrowed my brows and pulled my hand away from him.

What was he thinking?

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A/N

Hello, guys!

Hope you are all doing good today. As for me, I'm kind of trying to shoo Writer's Block Syndrome away while I'm working out on the next chapter! I'm trying now to set forth events so we can finally arrive the foreshadowed part "Again." Are you excited? Me, I'm freaking nervous... like urgghh!

Please, I need your support on this!

Don't forget to:
VOTE,
COMMENT, and
SHARE!!!

Always,
(sapphiregirl22)  ~_^

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To my babies, Hero and Zaiyeh, thank you for the smile, laughter, and inspiration. You keep mama going. I love you both so very much.