That caught me by surprise.

I wasn't used to something like this. It was the first time I had a guy tell me he had feelings for me, I can only tell my friends who were always sassy and dirty but sometimes came up with some good advice. Now they were in front of the screen and all excited as if they were reading a melodrama novel. They already had a picture of me taking off my clothes after I told them a guy had a crush on me.

"You are about to lose your virginity."

Bua, who had some sexual experiences, pointed to the camera as if she was pointing right in my face.

"Be ready for that. Check all porn sites and learn how to moan."

"Crazy bitch! He just confessed he liked me. I didn't tell you I'm going to sleep with him. Come on! be serious!"

I scolded them. She teasingly put her finger in her ear as if I shouted too loud.

"Come on! Don't act so innocent. You are the dirtiest one among us all." Nutshell said sarcastically.

"He likes you and do you like him?" "He is kinda cute."

"Why did you make it complicated? He likes you. You like him. Just go fuck end of the story."

"You wait there. I'm going to strangle you right now. Wait these!"

I pretended to grab my purse as if I was really going to ther. All of them laughed except Titang who said with a serious Voice.

"What did you tell him? "

"I was stunned and only said thank you. Then we were silent, till he walked me back to my dorm. Then nothing happened."

I wasn't sure why I reacted like that. I should be the same person as always be talkative and cheerful but I kept quiet and gave no feedback to him. I must be really confused.

"Were you excited when he said he likes you?" " I was shocked. "

" What are you going to do now? "

" That's why we're here. Should I go out on a date with him?" I was a bit worried when I thought about that.

"I really don't know what to do. What if it didn't work out well, and I still have to work with him."

"I don't think you should rush in. Just take it slow. "

"Why so chill? Sissy Don't waste time, just jump right in."

Bua suggested har extreme idea while Titang shook her head and told her to be serious.

"Don't divert the subject, you bitch! Ruk is in a dilemma now. You have lost your virginity, that's fine. "

" But She's not sexually experienced like you. Can't you give more some sensible advice? "

" Why so serious? I don't realize you have a serious moment. "

Bua said rolling her eyes of the camera and kept it quiet as Titang suggested.

"What about just chat with him and see how it goes. There might be some chemistry between you two"

"Yeah, I was lonely, I might try that."

I signed at the camera

"I knew I was being silly today. I was probably very lonely. Pam came to the shop today and I asked her out for dinner, but she said she was full. I felt upset and walked away. You don't have to tell me, I know I'm so annoying."

" Yeah you are annoying."

Nutshell threw a snack into her mouth and chewed in front of the screen. Bua bit her nails and gave no comment.

"I should have a boyfriend."

No one said anything but nodded agreeingly like they respected my decision. I heard a beep from my phone, and a message came in. I smiled satisfyingly once I read a makeup message from Pam.

[ Pam'my: What happened today? Did I upset you? ]

My heart was trembling with joy while I punched in a reply message. " No, I was hungry, Iwas in a bad mood. "

[ Pam'my: You should have told me. I'll go with you.]

" I thought you were having fun with the manager, so I didn't want to interfere. "

[ Pam'my. I saw a man follow you out. ] " He just asked me out for dinner. "

I paused before I told her what happened. We were close enough to share what had happened. She read the message and fell silent for a while. I frown with anxiety. I needed an opinion. Why did she just disappear? I threw my phone down on the bed and felt agitated. All eyes on the screen were on me. They saw what happened.

"What upset you?"

Nutshell leaned over as if she wanted to come out the other side. "Is that him?"

"No, not him."

"Who are you talking to? You were smiling, and then pouting. Are you talking to your lover?"

I looked down at the notebook's camera with a shocked. Then cut short with a harsh voice.

"Stop attacking me. It's annoying..I gotta do bye. "

It was all tense and quiet in my room. I was in a good mood chatting with my friends, then a new message from Pam turned me into a hot headed person. But she hadn't done anything, she just didn't reply to my message.

She read the message but did not reply. What the hell give me some respect!

Bing!

The ping noise I've been waiting for made me so excited. While I grabbed the phone, my heart was pounding once I saw Pam's message. I can't explain this, Maybe because she is beautiful.

[ Pam'my: He is cute. If you like him, you should date him, Ruk.]

Now I felt silent, looked at the message and didn't know how to reply to that. I squeezed the phone in my hand, thinking that was it? That was all you have to say?

" OK, I'll date him. " [Pam'my: Congratulation! ] " Ok. "

I felt tension between each letter that came through. Maybe I imagined it, but I felt Pam wasn't happy either. But why would she care about me? I was just her friend, right? What did I expect?. . . I threw my phone away, slumped on my bed and screamed in the pillow. What was happening? I was so frustrated...

Since I told Pam that I'll date Pheme. I barely saw her again. It was once a week. I also asked to swap shifts with my colleague instead as if I didn't want to see her. It had been almost 3 weeks since I hadn't seen her. No Line chat, No call, Not seeing her... Nothing.. I hadn't seen her and the manager hadn't seen her either. I'd avoided talking to Eak many times. I knew what he wanted to talk about. He wanted to see Pam again and wanted me to bridge the gap. I cannot avoid him forever though we were working in the same shop.

"Ruk, can I talk to you?" "Yes"

I smiled at the manager who now looked so sad. The usual-stern face was now a sad friendly face that made me uncomfortable. I guess he really wanted my help.

"I barely saw Pam" "Me too"

"Did you two fight? "

I shook my head in denial once I heard that.

"What would we fight about? I was thinking to ask if you had a fight with her"

"It's hard enough to have a chat with her. What would I fight with her about? What has she been doing?"

He signed. . . I teasingly asked him with a dead face.

"How come you didn't know where your girlfriend is?" "What girlfriend?"

He shook his head strongly.

"My heart bloom just only a smile from her. Don't even mention being together."

"Oh, you're not together?"

"No, just an acquaintance. Pam is only close with you in the shop"

I felt proud hearing that. Like he said, Pam wasn't an open book. She barely smiled or laughed with others. Now I thought back about what happened before in the shop. Pam laughed with the manager, but I should know that wasn't the real her. Now I was mad at myself.

"Do you want me to get in touch with her?" Eak's eyes gloved I smiled a bit before I said:

" I'll text her" "Thank you, Ruk. "

I loathe that happy face and wanted to ignore the request. On the other hand, I want to reach out to her. I just wanted to know how she was and what she was up to. Why did she disappear? But before I reached it, an incoming call from home rang on my phone.

"Hello"

[ Ruk, please come home. ]

Mom's anxious voice caused an alarm inside me. The image of the sweet face just vanished immediately.

" What happened mom? Why do you sound anxious?. "

[ Kawee is now in the hospital with gastric lavage. Ruk, do you have any way to contact Pam? I can't take this anymore.]

Her wailing cry made me want to cry too. I was planning to call Pam but not for this. After mom hung up. I looked at her number. I never gave her a call since I got the number. I stared at it as if I wished she would call back, like last time when I was looking in the chat. How was that possible? My trembling finger punched in the call button. There are three ringers signal at the other end. Her cheerful voice answered the phone as if she was happy to pick up my call.

"Ruk.."

Pam"

The wearisomeness in my voice sent through the other end to the receiver. "I need your help."

"What happened, Ruk?"

"Can you go to the hospital with me?"