Time flew past before my friend and I caught up again. We usually meet on Skype. But online chat is nothing like the actual meeting where you can meet, laugh and tease each other, even Mark Zuckerberg couldn't do it. . .

We're not on Skype today... . " I had three boyfriends. "

Bua mentioned and flicked her hair to her back like she was in a Pantene commercial all the time. All the friends couldn't help but shoot out some nosy questions.

" Did you sleep with them? "

" That's what you all can think about, huh? " Bua took a sip of her water and continued.

" What else do you think happened? " " Wow. "

We were all excited as if we were under her bed. We were curious teenagers and wanted to know about sex. We weren't conservative. We knew sex is natural as long as you knew how to protect yourself and be safe. But I had to confess I had no idea about condoms and pills at all. I just wanted to know the details.

" How did it feel? "

Well, I was just very curious.

" It was a lot. I was all worried, happy and bored. " She said openly.

I thought I might be in a cartoon book, so beautiful, sweet and sexy but I barely felt anything. I had high hopes that I could boast about it but to be honest, I wasn't impressed.

" I don't know, I haven't tried all the men in the world. I'm not sure If there is a good one out there. "

" If men don't make you feel good, why don't you try women? "

Nutshell suggested after listening for a long time, gestured to the next table with two lesbian couples sitting. The two were feeding snacks to each other.

" Those women look very happy. "

" I can't imagine how to make love with the same sex. A plug needs a socket, you know. That's how electricity works, right? "

I put out a comparison image.

" I don't think you need a plug for a socket. "

The conversation about an electrical outlet continued for a while until my head spinned. I wasn't sure we were in a restaurant or in an Electrical department of Engineering.

" What about you Compact, do you have any guy? "

All eyes were now on me. I shook my head and chuckled.

" If I have a guy, you will definitely hear about it. No, I don't have anyone. "

" You can be happy and be single, right? Maybe I should split with the current one and be single. It doesn't make much difference. "

Bua mentioned and looked at me like I inspired her immensely. . . I gave her a smirk and asked:

" What would you do if you're horngry? "

" What would a single person like you do when you're horngry? " " You're so dirty! "

" What did you do that's so dirty calling me dirty? "

I was safe by the bell when a chat pinged on my phone. Now I can avoid the dirty conversation. When I realized who sent me the message, my heart pumped up like a balloon.

[ Pam'my : I'm at the coffee shop for a while but I didn't see you. " ] I felt guilty all of a sudden. I quickly replied to her message.

" I'm sorry, I forgot to tell you I'm off today. " Silence... ... ... .

Her silence made me feel guilty. I didn't realize I started to get nervous and shook my leg until Titang put her thick palm on my leg.

" What happened to you? " " What? Where were we? "

Everybody is looking at me and smiling. Especially Titang who tried to curiously look at my phone before I put it face down on the table, as if I was trying to cover up something.

" We are talking about you. " " What about me? "

" We are wondering who you are chatting with. Your face beams when you are reading the messages. Then you're restless, and now you tried to cover up by putting your phone face down. Who are you talking to? It's time to tell. "

Everybody was looking at Titang and smiled knowingly. I realized then that they weren't talking about me. But Titang can smell something, so I sighed, and smiled at them.

" Don't worry, that was my brother's ex-girlfriend, Pam. Do you remember her? "

Titang looked surprised and nodded. " Are you still in contact? "

" Yes, we accidentally met in the coffee shop I work for. She sent me a message asking If I work today. She didn't see me at the coffee shop. "

" Oh, such a waste of time. I thought you're about to have a boyfriend. " Bua pouted.

" That's what all you wanted to talk about boys and sex, so nonsense. I gotta go now, I 'll see you later. "

I cut it short and got up quickly. I turned around and started to march out, I felt a strong pull on my hair that almost tip me over on my back from my queer friend who were still skeptical.

" Where are you going? "

" I'm going to the coffee shop, maybe Pam is still there. "

" What!? Why are you looking at me like that? "

I blinked innocently. My queer friend gave me a smirk knowingly. " Do you have a secret admirer? "

" Rubbish! I just told you, I don't have anyone. I'm in a hurry because Pam might be waiting for me. "

My thick gay friend finally let go of my hair and shooed me away. " Okay, just go! Pam is waiting. "

Why did he look at me like that? That was an uncomfortable look like he was spying on me. I stopped in front of the shop and looked back. Titang gestured with a phone and hand over his ear, telling me he would give me a call. Everyone waved goodbye.

I flagged down the taxi and rushed to the coffee shop with excitement. I had to say sorry to her for letting Pam wait, I forgot to tell her last night that I was off today. It was my fault, I hope she wasn't so mad. . . The taxi pulled into the destination and hopped out quickly after I paid the fare and I searched for her through the glass window. I felt a slap on my face, followed with disappointment once I saw the sweet face talking with the manager as if they were the only people in the shop. Though I could not hear the conversation, the pair seemed to be so involved that they didn't see a shadow looking at them while everyone in the shop all saw me walked in and greeted me. How did they not see me?

Around two minutes had passed, Pheme walked to the table and told them that I was standing outside. They both waved to me happily but not happy enough, especially Pam. .. ' I thought you'd be happy to see me? '

" I thought you were off? "

Pam said once I walked in. I tried to play it cool even though I was upset. ' Can't she be happier to see me? ' I casted my friend away just to see Pam.

" Yes, I'm off today but you said you were here. "

I tried to be casual and tried not to look like I wanted to be here. I wasn't sure why I did that.

" What are you talking about? Looked like a lot of fun. "

" Eak was looking for a tutor for his sister, so I proposed to do it. " Eak added immediately before I could say something.

" I have to negotiate the price for a long time. " " Don't make me sound so stingy. "

" You're a good tutor, It's really not expensive."

They both laughed as if it was the funniest thing anyone had ever heard. I bit my lip thoughtfully as if I didn't know how to join in the conversation. Laughing would be fake, crying would be terrible. I would only put on a still face and nodded accordingly.

" How long do you want to talk? "

My direct question stopped the laughter from them abruptly. Pam looked at me with confusion.

" What happened, Ruk? "

" I wanted to take you out for dinner. "

" I just had some snacks. I'm a bit full. "

I felt irritated and wanted to throw something out of the window as if she just rejected to have dinner with me.

" Ok, up to you then. "

I said it flatly and walked out of the shop immediately without saying goodbye. I wasn't sure why I had to be irrational like that. 'What did I expect to get from doing this? I guess I just wanted to see what Pam would do If she saw me walk out. Would she still enjoy talking with the manager? Oh! Why did I do that? '

" Ruukk! "

Pheme shouted my name sarcastically, I halted and closed my eyes patiently. It wasn't someone I expected. He walked toward me and still had his apron on.

" What happened? Why did you leave? The manager might be mad. " " I'm skipping work today? "

" Just like that? "

He said while taking off his apron.

" What is this all about? But It's okay, the manager is in a good mood. Nobody can piss him off today, what pissed you off today? "

This question reminds me of the picture of the two person giggling together and I felt the boil again.

" Maybe I'm hungry, It makes me fuzzy. "

" You're normally so cheerful, I saw Pam looked so confused when you left with a frown like that in your face. "

Well, she still wasn't here... . I didn't say that out loud. I sighed and was confused. I wasn't sure how I felt either.

" I had an appointment with my high school friends today and forgot to tell her that I'm off. She texted me she was here, so I rushed here expecting to go get dinner with her. But she told me she didn't want to eat, and even now she doesn't follow me out. "

I looked at Pheme annoyingly.

" I wanted her to follow me out. " " How is that my fault? "

" Damn it! I'm just annoyed, don't worry about me. "

The big guy put his arm around my neck and pulled me toward him. " You're just hungry. Let's go eat dinner. "

" My treat. "

" Ok.. "

It didn't matter who paid, what did matter was who I have It with. But whatever... .

" You're so attached to Pam. " " What? "

I felt an electric shock through my body as if Pheme had a frightening lie detector. I wasn't sure why I had to be scared about.

" You're upset just because Pam didn't want to have dinner with you. What will happen if she has a boyfriend? "

The idea caught me by surprise and made me feel so depressed just hearing them. What will I do If she is seeing someone?

" That's true, what should I do? "

" You should have a boyfriend, then you don't have to worry about her having a boyfriend. "

I looked at him agitatedly. If It was easy to have one, I would get one by now. I didn't have to hang out with the sweet-faced woman all the time.

" Is it easy to get one? "

" He might be around here somewhere. Take a look around. "

I gave out an answer without thinking. I keep walking forward still feeling fuzzy about Pam not wanting to have dinner with me. But Pheme, who walked alongside me all the time, now I stopped all of a sudden.

" Me.. "

" It's me.... I like you, Ruk. "