It's that feeling. The feeling you only get in nightmares, when you're falling and falling and falling and can't see the end- everything around you is pitch black, and endless void of nothing until you do fall. And every part of you breaks into pieces until you are nothing but meaningless particles scrambling around in hopes to reunite.
That's how Jungkook's heart felt.

At the very moment when Taehyung slammed the door shut, Jungkook felt the crack reach from the base of his heart right to very tip, reaching upwards and suffocating his lungs and neck and tightening his ribcage until he couldn't breathe.

So all he did was turn around, feel this emptiness caving into him that he hadn't felt for a long time, and walked trying not to let the prickling tears in his eyes fall out. He reached his room and opened the door, and sucked in a sharp breath when he saw Jimin with Jin and Namjoon in their room.

"Hey Kook! We're just practising maths, don't mind us." Jin smiled, and Jungkook gave him a tight lipped smile.

Jimin looked at him wearily and got up to walk over to him. "Hey.. everything good?" Jimin whispered, ensuring the other two boys didn't hear him.

Jungkook turned his head to look at his desk, cleaning it up mindlessly. "Y-yeah- it's fine."
"What did he say?"

"Nothing. It just- it- it's over between us." Jungkook said, words sour on his tongue.

"What?!" Jimin let out, and Jin and Namjoon rose their heads.

"What happened?" Namjoon asked, and Jimin waved his hand at them.

"Nothing! We're discussing this new movie that came out-" Jimin stammered, and then turned his head to face Jungkook. "What do you mean it's over?"

"I mean-" Jungkook started a little harshly, placing the last pen into place. "-that it's over between us. It never even started, so I honestly don't care."

"You sure?" Jimin asked, and Jungkook chuckled, giving him a bright smile.

"Of course, Park. I'm fine! Now, let me practice some maths with you guys." Jungkook said, walking over to Jin and Namjoon, to which Jimin just sighed.

Because he knew. He knew Jungkook wasn't fine.
He knew, because Jungkook smiled for the rest of the day. Laughed and talked more than usual. Seemed way too fine.

He knew, because later Jungkook went to sleep. And at 2 am, Jimin awake to the sound of soft crying. Jimin rose his head, and saw Jungkook turned the other way, shoulders quivering as he had his blanket scrunched tightly in his hold.

He was crying, soft gasps of breath leaving his lips. Jimin stood up and walked over to his single bed, sitting down beside him. "Jungkookie..."

"I-I'm fine." Jungkook squeaked out, and Jimin placed his hand on Jungkook's shoulder.

"I know you're not fine. Don't lie to yourself," Jimin said softly, and Jungkook stilled for a few seconds, clearly restricting.

Jimin let out a big sigh and then climbed onto the bed, laying down beside him and throwing his arm over his waist. "You're not fine. And- and that's okay. Just let it out, Kookie."

Jungkook began sobbing, not being able to control the loud cries that began leaving his lips, cheeks tear soaked and eyes blurry as he turned around, crying into Jimin's chest. "H-he was w-with a- a girl, Jimin. He- he doesn't c-care about me- he n-never did," Jungkook bubbled out, and Jimin pet his hair in gentle strokes, calming him.

"A-all this time. He l-looked at me so fondly, treated m-me with so much care, kissed me a-all the time a-a-and was so loving. H-how could all of t-that just- just go away? A-am I just s-stupid? Was h-he faking it the whole time j-just to get me to s-sleep with him? All of t-that- all of that was bullshit." Jungkook let out in the end, shuddering out a breath.

"You're not stupid. V's clearly lying to himself and full of self denial, so he's taking the frustration out by being an asshole. It sucks, and I'm really sorry. He's an asshole." Jimin said.

"He is." Jungkook whispered, his tears since having calmed down.

There was a bit of silence, and then; "Do you wanna cry a bit more?"

"Yes please." Jungkook squeaked, and Jimin chuckled, and then tightened his grip around them, while Jungkook lay his head on his chest, drifting into deep sleep.

///

A week passed.

Worst fucking week ever.

Jungkook was with his friends in the cafeteria, and awkward silence placed across those on the table. Jungkook clicked his spoon against his bowl quietly, not daring to move his eyes up in the slightest.

"So." Jin said, and Jungkook looked up hesitantly. "Is anyone going to mention the elephant in the room?"

"Okay, I know I gained a pound or two but it's only because football practice is over because of how it is outside-"

"What? No- shut up Hoseok. I mean... that." Jin said, pointing his eyes to the table beside them. Jungkook sighed softly, averting his eyes back down, because he knew what was happening on the table beside them.

Taehyung was sitting with the football guys. With some girl on his lap. Jennie, Jungkook thinks. They were making out furiously.
"It's just V being V." Namjoon said, and Jimin snickered.

"Yeah- um- not really. Haven't you noticed in the past week he's been more of a dick than usual? Like... I don't know. I told him ages ago that I was into this girl from my Physics class- and yesterday I saw him making out with her." Jimin mumbled, and Jungkook looked at him with worry.

"Been there dude. I told him I was going to try asking Jennie out for a date... and here he is." Yoongi mumbled, and then rolled his eyes.

Jungkook gulped. They weren't wrong. For the past week, Taehyung had been wild.

Every time Jungkook saw him in the hallways or in a classroom or in lunch or anywhere, he was with a girl. Making out with her, flirting with her, heck- even doing more. It was kind of gross.

He'd sprawl across chairs in his dominant demeanor, bandana on his head with hair looking more silver than usual, darkened eyes, followed by snapping at anyone who nearly looked away. He was back to square 1.
"V!" A loud voice snapped, and all the boys looked to the side and saw Eka, looking furious. "Are you fucking kidding me??"

"Relax, babe." V said, and then went back to kissing Jennie, who pushed Taehyung off and got off his lap.

"Ew, you're with her? Bye." Jennie mumbled, and then walked away, rolling her eyes.

"You fucking asshole. You slept with me last night and didn't even have the decency to text me back?" Eka snapped, and the boys on their table started snickering, while Jungkook's shoulders tensed.

"Fight fight fight-" Jin started chanting, and Namjoon smacked his shoulder.

They all watched with widened eyes as Taehyung grabbed Eka by her hips and began kissing her hard, and she just gave in and began kissing him.

"What even-" Hoseok mumbled, and Jungkook tsked and looked away. A younger freshman tried moving past Taehyung and Eka, and accidentally brushed his bag against Taehyung. "Look where you're going, queer." Taehyung growled, and the boy shook visibly and nodded hurriedly, running away, looking petrified.

Jungkook snapped his head up, looking at Taehyung in disbelief. Taehyung didn't care, just smirked up at Eka, who laughed awfully loud.

"Ew." Jimin said, and then looked at Jungkook. "Let's get out of here."

Jungkook nodded, feeling a weird gap in his chest. Taehyung got up with Eka and dragged her out of the cafeteria. Jungkook and Jimin got up as well and started walking out, but as Jungkook did- he bumped into someone. Or rather, Taehyung. Jungkook bumped into Taehyung.

Taehyung, who was in the middle of kissing Eka, turned his head in anger, and before looking properly- "Watch it, f-" Taehyung started, but then froze in the midst of his word when he saw Jungkook.

Jungkook, looking at him with his big doey eyes, confused and looking a little scared.

"S-sorry." Jungkook squeaked, and Taehyung looked at him for a few seconds. The first time they'd made eye contact since then.

"It's-" Taehyung started, and then let Eka go, seeing Jungkook take a step away from him. "-It's fine." Taehyung mumbled lowly, and Jungkook looked at him for a split second, but then Jimin grabbed his arm and pulled him away.

"I thought you two were best friends," Eka snickered, and Taehyung turned his attention back to Eka.

He didn't respond, just went back to kissing her, though his mind felt cluttered with other things.

///

"Asshole, bitch, dick, homophobic, big-forehead-having, dickweasel!" Jungkook snapped.

"You seem angry." Jimin pointed out.

"I am! We have Chemistry now, I hate Chemistry! I don't care about fucking chemical energetics!" Jungkook snapped, and Jimin chuckled.

"Girl, me too."

"Dude, ever since I came out, you've been really gay." Jungkook said, and Jimin laughed.

They entered the Chemistry class and saw a few people scattered here and there, as the bell hadn't rung yet. Jungkook saw Jennie sitting in the back with her friends.

"-pus she said something about having slept with him last night?? I literally hooked up with him yesterday, before dinner! He's such a fucking asshole." Jennie scoffed.

"Total fuckboy. Avoid him, Jennie." One of Jennie's friends said, and Jimin elbowed Jungkook.

"Seem to have the same problem as you, don't they?" Jimin laughed, going over to his seat to sit down.

Jungkook laughed, but didn't find it too funny. God, he was insignificant. Taehyung had done this to numerous girls!! He'd fucked them and then rushed out before things got tough! He did it with one guy and ran out when things got too ~gay for him! Dine and dash.

Jungkook sat down on his assigned seat, and then saw books put down beside him. "You look glum," Jungkook heard, and then looked to the side and saw Yugyeom.

"Oh- h-hi. Yeah, I guess I am." Jungkook mumbled, and Yugyeom sat down beside him.

"If if makes you feel any better, Jackson ate 3 tacos in one and a half minutes and then burped in my face." Yugyeom said, and Jungkook burst out giggling.

"Oh god- I don't even want to know." Jungkook said, and Yugyeom smiled.

"Say, did you get the chem homework? Because I didn't get the last question-" Yugyeom started, and then Jungkook gasped, eyes growing all big.

"Oh no! I totally forgot there was homework!! Nooo~" Jungkook squealed in distress, and then scurried to take out his notebook and textbook, pen fumbling in his hand.

Jungkook took out his book and messily wrote 'homewrok' on the top, and then began writing down pure bullshit from the textbook, but then felt a hand place on top of his. "Woah, relax." Yugyeom whispered, and Jungkook saw his close proximity and felt himself hesitate. "Copy it off me. I don't mind,"

"R-really? Aw- thank you." Jungkook smiled, and Yugyeom grinned and then showed him his notebook.

Jungkook wrote down the first question and the answer to it, and heard Yugyeom make some comment about how his q's look like hockey sticks, and Jungkook began giggling.

Abruptly, another pile of books smacked onto the desk Yugyeom was sitting on. Yugyeom got startled, looking up in confusion, and Jungkook did too. When he did, he wish he hadn't.

Taehyung. Looking annoyed. "Get up."

"Um-" Yugyeom started, but Taehyung clearly didn't have the time to take in his shit.

"This is my seat, newbie. Move." Taehyung snapped, and Yugyeom gulped. "I-I'll just move after the- the bell rings. I was helping J-Jungkook with homework-"

"I said move or I'll make you," Taehyung growled lowly, and Yugyeom stood up instantly, grabbing his books in a hurry, to which Jungkook groaned. Yugyeom got up and went to his seat, sitting down quickly.

Jungkook looked at his empty notebook with the half done homework, and then looked at Taehyung, who sat down beside him. Jungkook's eyebrows furrowed. Asshat.

Jungkook looked down, gripping his pen tightly, and ooooh- how he detested him. Hate was a strong word, but Jungkook needed a stronger one. He felt his grip around his pen growing tighter. Jungkook DESPISED Taehyung. If he could somehow have mice crawl over Taehyung's body and infest him with the plague, Jungkook would. He hates him SO much. He hates him with every bone in his body, he-

"Do you have a pen?" Taehyung's deep voice broke his snap, and Jungkook looked up to see Taehyung looked at him intensely, with his menacing stare that he'd only give him before piping him down.
Fuck, Jungkook thought. "Y-yeah," Jungkook squeaked out stupidly, and then grabbed his pencil case and looked in it.

He grabbed a pen and handed it to Taehyung.

"This is a highlighter."

"S-sorry-" Jungkook let out softly, grabbed the pen from him. When he did, he felt their hands touch, and fuck, now Jungkook was blushing. Great. Just great.

Jungkook put the highlighter back in his pencil case and then sighed to himself. Stop. Blushing. For god's sake, Jungkook. Get a grip. You should hate him, not blush when he speaks-

"Jeon...pen?" Taehyung said, and Jungkook blushed deeply.

"Yeah- s-sorry-" Jungkook stammered, and then took a pen and gave it to Taehyung, who looked at Jungkook with a weird look on his face which Jungkook didn't want to examine. He didn't want to see the underlying meaning.

"Thanks." Taehyung mumbled, and Jungkook swore he saw a bit of a smile on Taehyung's face.

Jungkook looked at his pencil case and then realised he gave Taehyung the only pen he had. He bit his lip, and then heard the bell ring, signalling the beginning of class. Jungkook looked around, and saw Yugyeom rummaging through his pencil case.

"Gyeomie," Jungkook called out rather loudly, and saw through his peripheral vision that Taehyung snapped his head at Jungkook. "Can I get a pen?"

"Sure, Kookie." Yugyeom mimicked with a grin, and Jungkook giggled. Yugyeom tossed a pen at Jungkook, who grabbed it and then waved at him cutely.

Jungkook saw Taehyung's hand gripping the pen Jungkook lent him tightly, vein popping in his hands. Jungkook looked at Taehyung, and saw how his eyes darkened, how he was looking away in anger.

Jungkook felt something inside him gleam. A vicious sort of idea. It made him smirk a little.

Jealousy had always been the ugliest emotion.