The second day without Hyunjin had dawned and Chan had retreated directly after breakfast to the garden, to the pond with the water lilies.

He missed Hyunjin and Jeongin insanely and didn't want to hear or see anyone else. Even though he knew he was being watched very closely, he just couldn't help it.

Silently he sat there and stared into the dark pond water. Time passed without him really noticing and when his therapist suddenly appeared next to him, Chan was insanely frightened.

"Here you are. Have you even had lunch?"

Without a word, Chan shook his head. He didn't feel like eating anything at all. Not even the possibility of stealing a knife could have lured him into the dining room.

"We have a therapy session now. Can you please come in?"

Reluctantly, Chan stood up. He didn't want to talk about his feelings. Not about what had happened and certainly not about what all that had done to his psyche.

But at least it was a group meeting and no one had to say anything if they didn't want to.

Silently, he followed the therapist, who took a different path than usual back to the house.

Curious, Chan looked around. He had never been to that part of the garden and it didn't look like there were people here often either.

"That way we get to the group rooms faster," explained his therapist with a smile, who had noticed that Chan had stopped.

Again, Chan just nodded and they continued on their way. Past a somewhat rusty-looking, really high garden gate, which looked impossible to climbed over.

But Chan noticed very carefully that the gate was hanging a little crooked in the hinges.

The afternoon flew by, but Chan didn't really notice anything. He pondered. If only he got the chance, he might be able to escape through the gate without having to put his other plan into action.

But for this he first had to find out how rusty the gate was and whether it could actually be opened.

It wasn't until dinner that Chan was mentally present again, at least somewhat. But actually only because he was really hungry by now. Alone he sat at the very back of the dining room and stared evilly at everyone who came even close to him.

He just wanted his peace. He didn't want to meet anyone new or make new friends, as his therapist had suggested.

After all, he had already found Hyunjin and Jeongin. He definitely didn't need other people. He just wanted the two back.

Yawning, he looked around the dining room and noticed that it was getting empty. He hadn't hurried to eat, which was why he was almost one of the last. Thoughtfully he spooned the last bit of soup, got up and carried his tray to return the dishes.

Somehow he had the feeling of being watched, which turned out to be true. Because when he turned to find out who was watching him, Yuna appeared next to him.

"I'll accompany you back to your room."

Silently, they walked side by side, all the way back to Chan's room. It wasn't until Yuna had closed the door behind them that she finally started talking. "Hyunjin is doing reasonably well. He has two broken ribs, but otherwise he lacks nothing." Although Yuna saw Chan's gaze darkening, she continued to speak. "But that also means that he will be on sick leave for at least the next two weeks."

Horror and panic rushed through Chan's entire body.

All that meant that he wouldn't see Hyunjin for much longer than he had thought. His feelings and thoughts were pure chaos and he didn't know what to do next.

He had fallen madly in love with Hyunjin.

The kisses they had shared with each other had only reinforced all this and all the time he had had to spend alone since then drove him slowly but surely crazy.

"I'm sorry...", Yuna hesitantly put a hand on Chan's arm. She didn't understand what was going on between Hyunjin and Chan, but she noticed that Chan was doing better since Hyunjin took care of him. "Would you like to have something to fall asleep..?"

After a moment's hesitation, Chan nodded.

He had absolutely no idea how to advance his plans. And he knew very well that it would take ages before he could fall asleep after the news.

"It's okay, I'll be right back."

Although it wasn't really late and Yuna would probably give him the choice of when he would take the pills, he decided to go to bed right now. He saw no point in staying awake any longer and brooding.

Which was why he put on his pajamas and went to the washroom to wash his face and brush his teeth.

All the way to the washroom, which was at the very end of the hallway and not to the one where he last had seen Hyunjin. The memories of what had happened were too fresh.

A look in the mirror revealed that he looked just as horrible as he felt. Which also explained why Yuna and his therapist made such an effort to try and make him feel concluded. Lead him to believe that he wasn't alone.

Sighing, he slapped some cold water in his face. Which somehow was all he could do apart from brushing his teeth, because all his skincare was still in his parents' house.

Nothing was normal in his life anymore and since Hyunjin and Jeongin were gone, he only noticed it all the more clearly.

He hated it. Hated his life.

Despair rose in him. He had managed so well to get away from the negative thoughts. Had finally managed to look forward to something again. Forward to see Hyunjin to be exact. And now he was suddenly just gone.

A sob escaped his throat. And from then on there was no stopping. Tears flowed down his cheeks and his fingernails drilled into his forearm.

Whining, he let himself sink down on the wall and sat right there. Leaning against the cold tiles, his fingers dug into his forearm.

"Chan?"

Chan didn't really realize that Yuna had come into the bathroom. Only instinctively he turned in the direction where the voice came from and stared at the nurse with blank, wide eyes.

"Not again..." Yuna mumbled worried, kneeling next to him. Gently released his fingers from his forearm and then helped him get up. "Come... let's take you to bed..."

Without resistance, Chan let himself be pulled away. Allowed Yuna to gently push him onto his bed and push the sleeping pills into his mouth. Took a sip of water as she held the glass in front of his mouth and then sank into bed.

The feeling of the duvet felt insanely overwhelming when Yuna covered him. He heard the murmur, as she said something to him, but the words didn't appeal to him at all.

He wasn't really present anymore.

The thoughts in his head made little to no sense and everything around him felt somehow so wrong.

It was only when the medicine began to work that his thoughts became a little clearer again. He felt how his arms became heavy and how it became increasingly difficult for him to keep his eyes open.

For a moment, he noticed Yuna's face at the edge of his field of vision and wondered very briefly why she was there.

Hyunjin should be with him.

Just before he fell asleep, he felt a hand on his upper arm as the darkness slowly spread out around him.

Panic gripped him.

He felt like he was falling into a dark abyss. He wanted to hold on somewhere in panic, his mouth wide open to scream for help, but not a sound left his throat.

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