as nine thirty neared, seonghwa's nerves picked up even more than before. a few minutes prior, hongjoong's mother had left to pick the boy up from wooyoung's house. seonghwa knew it was only a matter of seconds before they arrived back home, meaning it was only a matter of seconds before he had to apologize to hongjoong.

what if he doesn't accept my apology? so far, everything has gone right with his family members, too right if i'm being honest... maybe this'll be my rude awakening...

before seonghwa could think any further, the front door of the kim residence opened. he stayed as quiet as a mouse, not wanting hongjoong to know that he was lurking in his house just yet.

"mommy, i think i'm just gonna go to bed now. i know you wanted to watch spongebob with me, but i'm really sad... i don't think i'll be able to do it." seonghwa heard hongjoong say to his mother and his heart dropped, hoping the whole plan wouldn't be ruined because of this.

"no, you can't!" ms. kim exclaimed, "i have a surprise for you in the kitchen that you need to see, i think you'll be wide awake after you see what it is."

hongjoong was confused by his mother's statement at first, furrowing his eyebrows at her sudden enthusiasm. but after taking one deep breath in, he smelt the strawberry shortcake from the kitchen, a large grin forming on his face afterwards. he squealed out loud, skipping his way over to the kitchen happily.

seonghwa heard the boy's tiny feet skipping on the ground and his heart rate increased significantly. he took a deep breath, standing up from the seat he was sitting in at the kitchen table. he moved the cake to sit right in front of him, the frosting writing out 'i'm sorry' in sparkly red icing.

when hongjoong entered the room, his smile immediately turned into a frown when his eyes met seonghwa's. seonghwa's heart dropped, immediately figuring that the night would not end well.

before he even opened his mouth, hongjoong quickly turned around to face his mother who was still standing by the front door, giving seonghwa his backside.

"mommy, why is he here? how did he get in the house? why is he standing by my cake!" hongjoong cried out, tears threatening to fall down his cheeks as he screamed at his mother. chinsun walked up to him and put a hand on his shoulder, giving hongjoong a weak smile.

"baby, i let him in. seonghwa has a lot to say to you and he asked me if it was ok. he even helped me make the cake for you. can you please go over there and listen to what he has to say? i think you'll appreciate it." ms. kim said sweetly to her son, hoping he would listen to her word and wouldn't run off to his room.

hongjoong looked down at the ground, pondering what he should do in his head. he let a few tears escape his eyes, the salty liquid splashing on the tile floor below him. he eventually lifted his head and nodded it, hesitantly turning around from his mother and walking closer to the kitchen table.

"i'm going to leave you two alone to talk. if anyone needs me, i'll be in my bedroom." chinsun excused herself, waving goodbye to both boys in the room. hongjoong waved weakly and seonghwa bowed respectfully to the woman before waving goodbye.

"so, why are you here?" hongjoong asked with venom in his words, not even bothering to look up into seonghwa's eyes. seonghwa expected this reaction so he didn't react negatively, already having his whole speech ready for the boy.

"hongjoong, i messed up. i messed up t-terribly." seonghwa started, immediately getting choked up as he spoke.

"yeah i know you did. what about it?" hongjoong sassily asked, crossing his arms as he replied.

"w-well, i'm here to apologize for it. now, don't get me wrong... you don't have to accept my apology, because hell, i don't know if i could forgive someone if they did what i did to you, but i hope you realize how genuine i'm being when you hear what i have to say.

i've never met someone so confident, so accepting, so kind in my entire life. even when others are being mean to you, when others are hurting you, you're nice to them. you're the type of person everyone wishes they could be, the type of person everyone wants to be around. even when the world around you is negative, you're positive. you're like the light at the end of the tunnel. you're someone i strive to be in life, a true inspiration to others.

hongjoong, nobody has ever meant more in my life than you do. i've never met someone so special, so beautiful, so perfect in my life. now ok, so what that you're different from others? your differences are what make you, you. they're what makes you hongjoong." seonghwa finished explaining, pouring his heart out to the boy in front of him. after hearing his speech, hongjoong furrowed his eyebrows, seeming really confused by what the older had to say.

"i'm just confused, seonghwa. you say you love my differences, that i'm an inspiration to you... so why did you do what you did to me? why did you hurt me so bad? why were you so embarrassed of me that you couldn't take me to the formal?" hongjoong asked seonghwa question after question, each one hurting both boys more and more as he asked them.

"because i was an idiot, hongjoong. i was a complete and utter idiot. there is nothing i can do or say that will take back what i did to you, and i'm so sorry about that. if i could reverse time, i swear i would. i guess i just never realized how much you really meant to be back then." seonghwa admitted, trying his best to relay his message to hongjoong. much to his dismay, hongjoong just scoffed at his lack luster response.

"so what do i mean to you, seonghwa? huh? what do i mean to you? tell me!" hongjoong asked with a head tilt, finally meeting seonghwa's eyes and putting his hands on his hips as he spoke.

"you mean the world to me, hongjoong. no, scratch that-- you are my world, hongjoong. you're my entire world." seonghwa said as he stared deeply into hongjoong's eyes.

"why did it take you so long to realize that then? why did you have to hurt me to realize it?" hongjoong asked, pleading for an answer from the older as tears brimmed his eyes.

"i can't answer that hongjoong. i can't answer that because i don't know the answer myself. but, after hurting you, there is something i realized." seonghwa said as his heart rate increased.

"what is it? what did you realize?" hongjoong curiously asked.

seonghwa took a few deep breaths before continuing on. he was nervous to admit his true feelings to hongjoong, but he knew that this was what he had to do. he had to get his hongjoong back, no matter what.

"i realized that i love you, hongjoong. i am in love with you. now you don't have to say it back, it's ok if you don't love me back... but i felt you should know because i'm done with lies. i love you, kim hongjoong. i love you.

and i also realized that you're the only one i want, the only person i need in my life. you are my person, to be frank. i don't care anymore. i don't care about what anyone else says, about anyone else's opinions... i just don't care about it. because if there's something i've learnt from a million mistakes, you're the one that i want at the end of the day." seonghwa said with a serious look in his face as he stared deeply into hongjoong's teary eyes.

hongjoong couldn't help but allow a small smile from on his face after hearing what seonghwa had to say. seonghwa sounded so genuine about everything he was saying; the apology, not caring for others opinions, and his love for him.

"you know, i've never been hurt so bad in my entire life... but the reason i was hurt so bad was because you meant the world to me. i really thought what we had was different, i thought it was special to you... but after what you did to me, i figured i was just another one of your toys.

but now, i realize that's not true. as you know, i'm a forgiver. i'm one to forgive people. i actually never did what i did to you to anyone else in my life, i've never ignored someone or let someone upset me so much... but with you, it was different.

now i'm sorry, but i can't say i love you back. i can't say that right now. do i think i might've loved you in the past? maybe. i can't be too sure because i never loved anyone, but i can guarantee i never cried over my past crushes." hongjoong giggled a bit as he spoke, scratching the back of his head awkwardly as seonghwa looked at the ground with a small smile on his face.

"but maybe, just maybe, if we fix everything... i can grow to love you, park seonghwa. because i know deep down that you're my person too. you mean the world to me just like you said i mean the world to you. and i know for a fact that you're the one that i want at the end of the day."

hongjoong finished speaking, finally allowing a smile to grow on his face. seonghwa completely broke down, unable to control the happy tears from falling from his eyes. hongjoong walked over to where seonghwa was standing and opened his arms, allowing seonghwa to run into them and hug him tighter than he's ever hugged hongjoong before.

"h-hongjoong, i love you. i love you so f-fucking much. i'm so sorry. i'm so so so s-sorry." seonghwa cried hard as he dug his head into hongjoong's chest, bending down to allow the smaller boy to cradle him. hongjoong just smiled in response, lifting seonghwa's head so he could meet the other's bloodshot eyes.

"seonghwa, i know you're a great guy. you really are the best. but please, i beg of you, don't make a fool out of me. don't ever hurt me again." hongjoong begged with pleading eyes and seonghwa vigorously nodded his head.

"yes! oh yes, of course not. baby, i'll never hurt you again. i can never lose you again. oh god, no... that was the worst week of my life, i swear." seonghwa rambled out, causing hongjoong to giggle as a light blush rose onto his cheeks.

"good. if you ever hurt me again, consider yourself dead meat!" hongjoong backed away from the hug, putting on a fake mad face as he crossed his arms with a foot stomp. seonghwa chuckled at how adorable hongjoong looked as he wiped the tears off of his bright red cheeks.

"will do, boss!" seonghwa exclaimed, putting a hand on his head like he was saluting the younger.

"ok, now let's eat this cake! mommy's strawberry shortcake is way too good to leave sitting out uneaten like this!" hongjoong cried out, running over to his usual seat at the kitchen table. seonghwa smiled and turned around to grab plates, forks, and a knife to cut the cake for the two of them.

the two boys sat together for the first time in a while, eating and enjoying each other's company.

i mean it when i say i'll never do anything to hurt my joongie. never, ever again, seonghwa thought to himself.

YAY THEY'RE HAPPY AGAIN... Y'ALL CAN'T KILL ME NOW!!!

and i know it's technically not for a little while longer but like... HAPPY BIRTHDAY BIG BITCH MINGI!!! YOU CUTE ASS HOE. I HOPE YOU HAVE A GREAT DAY, YOU DESERVE IT YOU PATHOLOGICAL LIAR!!!

-vic