in the quiet of the night
i draft letters on the computer
so i don't smudge the ink
with my hands
i fill out the papers
my therapist sent me
in the hopes that maybe
in these next few months
i can fix what has gone
wrong in my head
deep down i hope that
at least if i get anything
out of this trip
it's glory and a little bit of sanity
with one you lose the other
but i am still praying for both
so i walk until the sunset
and i chew my dinner slowly
i listen to ecology podcasts
and i grab a smoothie
with all the vitamins
for dessert
maybe if i treat myself
like a human being and rest
maybe my body will love
me again