Mitali Jain 

The next morning, as we made our way back to the hospital we were quite anxious, for the psychologist was here and had went through Daksh’s situation. 

When we would ask kaka to tell us more about what Daksh had been through all these days, he would completely ignore us… when persisted, he would say that Daksh has forbidden him from telling us anything. 

It was as if the whole thing was in a big blunder. We were trapped, the gated almost invisible, and the doctor being here though was a ray of hope, yet it was quite light to make our way through the dark path on which we were walking. 

As we reached the hospital, with Jai and veer discussing about some stuff which we weren’t yet made aware about, I fell back with Shakti, who had been in her own thoughts and world with the bodyguards as usual following her trail. 

“When this whole thing gets over, I want to come with you to your home.” I said. 

“You mean the Palace… it’s not my home, may be Ray’s but not mine.” Shakti gave me that weird look which I, for the first time I was unable to read. It somehow reminded me of the Shakti whom I had met in our earlier days of friendship. The days when it used to be so difficult to crack her up! 

“Has it got to do with a certain prince that I know?” I fired back. Her steps halting with my mere statement surely gave me a whole lot of ideas, but the way she turned around and let out a laugh it made me scrunch my eyebrows in confusion. 

“My dear, you aren’t aware about how many Prince do you actually know in total. First get your facts checked.” 

And then she was off, with the heard of those stupid heavy bodyguards behind her. 

*** 

The atmosphere near the doctor’s cabin was so thick that it felt uncomfortable for me to go ahead. Though our parents decided it was best to stay at the villa, my mom and Jai’s had strictly warned me and Shakti to be with the boys. 

They weren’t in the right kind of mindset, but surely they weren’t irresponsible and unaware as to how it was that they were to behave? 

In fact at certain point it scared me, what if I acted irrationally? 

Shaking away my thoughts, I slightly knocked onto the door of the cabin and pushed it, the door swung smoothly, as I walked in to be greeted by the three hefty men seated on the chair, followed by a female, who it seemed was Daksh’s doctor, and then my eyes took in Shakti, who stood there, a weird look had now married her face. 

  I entered the room and walked towards Shakti and stood by her side, as Jai then smiled at me and said, “Mitali, I guess you know her, she is Daksh’s psychiatrist.” 

My eyes ventured towards the last chair, the girl seated beside Jai, now finally had a face, as she looked up from the files. And the moment our eyes met, I felt as if relief had somehow flooded throughout my being. 

“Tejal” I breathed out in relief. It was as if I knew that now that she was here nothing could ever go round. I had a guarantee that Daksh was surely in right hands. 

“Hi Mitali, you okay?” she asked. Her voice as always held that tenderness with which she would ask me such questions. 

“I am, please continue with whatever you had been doing, it’s been a while now.” 

With a small nod, she continued to further read the file, as I felt Shakti taking hold of my hand and giving it a small squeeze. I didn’t look at her, as my eyes were strained on Jai’s frame. 

His shoulders so stiff with tension, the slight frown so unknown to him, seemed to have now got pasted on his face. Time and again he would fidget with his fingers, his clock, his phone and what not. 

Never had he ever been this disturbed… ever. 

“Doctor, what do you think by when will he be able to get out of the coma?” Tejal asked. 

“That depends; we wanted you to be here so that we would be able to understand if there is any precaution as such that is needed to be taken while his treatment is going on?” 

“Daksh had been in his initial stage when I had talked and tested him two weeks ago, so that won’t be a problem, but again, schizophrenia is hard to depict, there could be any changes at any point of time… right now the most important thing is for him to wake up, I had put him on basic anti depressant pills, other than that nothing else, so you can surely continue with the normal treatment… the rest could be told only after he wakes up.” 

She then turned to me, and eyed all of us. 

“You all… keep on talking with him; make sure he feels that he is wanted here.” Tejal took a deep breath and then said, 

“Doctor if it’s okay, I would like to speak to all of them.” 

“ohh yes sure, you can shift to the waiting room, or may be the canteen, right now it will be quite empty, I have a few patients coming in, we will discuss the case after you are done.” 

We all moved towards the waiting room, after a quick thanks to the doctor. 

Soon we all got seated on the couches of the waiting room, with Jai seated right beside me, as he took hold of my had and began making circles on the back of it. 

We all waited anxiously as Tejal made her way towards Kaka who was seated at the farthest end; once again his whole body was tensed with worry. 

Tejal sat down near him and said, 

“Kaka, Give me the diary, I think it’s the right time now.” 

The poor old man, looked at her, his eyes glistened with unshed tears as he then dived his hands back into the bag that he would carry around with him as if it held one of the biggest possessions of his life. 

As he took out the black colored diary with his hands trembling, he began to sob even loudly and handed the diary to Tejal who stood up gave a slight pat on his back and walked right in front of all of us and said, 

“The first time I had met Daksh was when I had just began my practicing this was 4 years ago… we had met at a gallery, he was staring at a painting for a long time, I had enquired about it and then we had began talking.” 

As Tejal began talking I felt as if something really very important was snatched away from me. Never had I realized until then that how much it had mattered to me the way Daksh and I had met. It felt as if what I thought was ours…wasn’t really ours. 

“After a few days I had got a call from him, he said he wanted to have a private counseling sessions with me and that it should be completely secret, none should know about them… it was then I began to know about his nightmares and all, I had recommended him to write down the feelings in his diary that made him feel quite overwhelmed or were difficult to cope with, and then we would discuss.” 

“Over the time the issue of nightmares got dismissed but then there was a new problem, now and then Daksh would hallucinate a few things, this started a year back. I was still trying to find out what was it that was really wrong with him.” 

Tejal walked up to me and then handed me the diary and said, 

“And it was then he met you,” her eyes staring right into mine. “He was different, he wouldn’t talk about himself, he would talk about you, he would be happy every time he would meet you. but still he wasn’t doing that well, within months he started to show further signs, he would get suspicious, his taste buds would fluctuate, he would see and believe things that never happened.” 

And as if Tejal’s words were Daksh’s Alibi for all that happenings, him claiming to have me there at his place renovating it, or be it his mom’s case or anything else that had us in questions for so long. 

“Mitali, Jai… Daksh is very much alive right now, his mind is just difficult to understand what is it that’s going on in it, and as much as I am not sure how to say this… but Mitali, I think you are one major person that can help us with bringing him back.” 

“Read that diary… I want all of you to talk to him, he is in coma, but he can still hear you, remind him of all the good times that you all know of, make him come back to us, because once he wakes up, we will be able to work on his case well.” 

“Jai… I am sorry but” 

“It’s okay… I –“

I didn’t knew what it was, as jai let go off my hand and walked out of there, with all of us looking at his retreating figure. One by one every one stood up from there and went off to somewhere while I sat there, caressing the black book in my hand. 

“Mitali.” 

“I am scared Tejal… you knew all this time what all was going on yet you kept me in dark… why?” 

Tejal sat beside me and took hold of my hands. 

“You love him, right?” she asked. Her question made me choke on my breath. I knew she would read just well between the words, she knew very well to do that, but to accept that to hear it from someone seemed so damn difficult. 

“I know you do, and so does Jai.” Her statement made me look at her, my neck moved at such a speed that I felt a small pain at the end of it. 

“He knows, if he hadn’t he wouldn’t have choked out on his tears, and left from there, I wouldn’t have asked him for his assurance. But he as well knows that you love him.”

As Tejal spoke my mind had gone completely numb, what was I supposed to say further… was I supposed to accept each and everything? 

Why was it that everyone around me knew what I felt like except for me, did I know so little about myself. 

It seemed so stupid, I was scared, how was I supposed to face Jai… he knew, then why didn’t he ever asked me? 

But more than that from when did he knew, how did he come to know about my feelings about whom even I didn’t knew? 

Did he really know me so well? 

And Daskh? 

What about him, how was I going to face him… what was I supposed to do now? 

“Mitali say something.”Tejal called out. 

“I love Daksh… but I as well Love Jai. I do love Jai a lot.” And as I kept on repeating the words, I broke down with the whirlwind of emotions that were going on in my mind… I wanted to be beside Jai at that time, I wanted him to tell me that all will be okay… 

But then as soon as that thought went by, I found myself wishing for Daksh to be there as well, to tell me what was right…what I should do.

And this made me cry even more.