It had been a very busy day for Dr. Krill. Apparently all of the humans had gotten together before hand and determined today would be the day when they were all going to do the stupid human things, like smashing their fingers in doors, or allowing their internal organs to become inflamed, or to have random attacks of head pain so bad they throw up if they try to stand.

Dr. krill did not approve of any of these particular medical conditions, one of them involved the human doing something dangerous, and the others were completely unreasonable and downright improper actions of the human body, at least he thought. What kind of organism just ahs random bouts of severe pain caused by inflamed organs or by who knows what! Headaches without a reason should not be something that is commonly accepted.

Of course the humans tended to disagree with him and continued to have unusual and useless medical problems.

At least when they had accidents, it didn't often have to do with their organs just malfunctioning.

The humans he passed in the hallway nodded to him as he passed by showing their bright white teeth in that strange way humans had when they were greeting someone. It had taken Krill a long time to get used to that specific behavior, but it was something he quickly had to get over, and learn to distinguish from the similar, but completely opposite "snarl" which tended to show more gums.

He was just walking down the hallway passing by the Captain, who, in his usual manner was grinning rather aggressively and practically bouncing down the hall like a ball.

Following behind him came a group of marines looking both shocked and awed.

Ramirez shook his head, "Wow, Captain, I, I don't think I have ever seen someone do that."

Maverick prodded him from the other side, "How does it all fit in there."

He waved them all off, "There is no substitute for pure talent, and when it comes to consuming copious amounts of food, I am the champion."

Jackie shook her head in awe, "if I did that to myself I would immediately hurl."

The captain waved them all off with a widening grin, "Just face it, you will never be as awesome as I am."

"I don't really know if awesome is the word I would use." Ramirez added stepping back to glance over at his captain with awe.

Krill stood to the side of the hall as they passed, eyeing the captain, sure he had gone and done something stupid at some point to warrant all of this nonsense, but based on the context of their conversation, he couldn't be entirely sure what.

The human's smiled and greeted him as they passed in the hallway, making it down only a few feet before, the air was rent with a violent and pain filled noise that echoed up and down the corridor with a sudden sharp blast.

It was like the noise the captain's dog made when someone stepped on her foot mixed with the sound a human makes when they get punched in the gut.

Everyone turned to look, especially Krill, over at the captain, who now had his hand clamped roughly over his mouth.

Maverick's eyes were wide, "What was tha-"

The sharp noise cut her off again as the captain's body spasmed violently, all the muscles from his abdomen, to his shoulders and neck clenching aggressively as the horrific noise was pushed out through his lips.

He clamped the other hand over his mouth.

Krill stared at the human in shock and confusion. After a few seconds, he dropped his hand from his mouth with a sort of sheepish grin, "No idea what that was, but I think I'm good now."

That was not the case.

*HIC*

The sound was piercing, and this time krill got a good look as the entire upper body spasmed, forcing that horrendous sound from the man's throat. He practically doubled over grimacing in pain and holding his chest.

"Ow." He muttered piteously.

Krill did not notice the laughter and smiles from the other human as he ran forward, "What is this! What is happening!" he had never seen anything like this before. Horrible spasms, that horrible noise, and the pain on the man's face. It was almost as if his stomach was jumping around on his insides, Krill did not think that was possible, but knowing humans, anything was possible.

*HIC*

Muscles in the abdominal wall seized violently The human had one hand over his mouth and one hand over his chest.

Krill grabbed the human by the arm and tugged him away towards the infirmary, "This is horrible. What is happening, what did you do."

The human opened his mouth as if he was about to speak, but another violent spasm hit him causing that horrible barking noise and a grimace of pain.

Krill had no idea what this could be. He had never seen anything like it, he had seen coughing, sneezing and vomiting, but those were the only symptomes that were usually related to strange or horrible noises. But this, this was different. He couldn't imagine what it could be other than some sort of spasm in the internal organs.

What might that cause?

Was it contagious?

What other symptoms should he suspect?

If it was internal, might he expect some sort of internal bleeding. Might he expect that the innards could flip and twist on themselves so that it caused necrotic death of the innards? Was that even possible with humans. He had heard it was possible in animals.

*HIC*

He turned back to look at the human following after him with a grimace still on his face. The marines and a few other humans were following behind, and to Krill's annoyance they seemed rather amused when they should be concerned.

He waved an angry hand at them, "Get back! Get back, if it contagious is might spread to all of you."

A chorus of giggling erupted from the humans.

"Just because it looks funny does not mean it's not dangerous!" He howled, grabbing the human even tighter and hurrying up the hall and towards the infirmary.

He burst through the doors not a few seconds later, causing Dr. katie to jump where she was standing and turn around in shock and surprise, one hand held to her chest, "Oh, Dr. krill you scared me."

"You should be scared!" He announced, dragging the captain over and forcing him to sit where Dr katie could see.

"We might have some sort of infectious disease that causes visceral spasms."

"Visceral spasms." She said in confusion.

*HIC*

Captain Vir lurched forward, one hand to his neck.

Dr katie paused, and, For a moment Krill thought she was smiling, but when she turned around to face him she had a very serious look on her face, her eyes widened, "I have seen this before."

Dr Krill frose nervously, "And?"

She shook her head, "Very serious. I have only treated very few cases. The prognosis is.... Bleak."

Krill froze in his place staring at the doctor in horror.

"Oh no, what do we do? How do we treat it? I have never seen anything like it before."

Katie nodded seriously as captain Vir frowned at her in confusion, "Yes, yes this is very serious, and it is important that we work quickly. I warn you now, doctor, that the treatments for this condition are very unconventional."

She walked over to where the captain was sitting.

*HIC*

She stared at him with a long and searching contemplative expression before pulling her hand back, and, to krill's shock, backhanding the man rather viciously in the chest.

He grunted in indignation, leaping from the blow, "HEY!"

Dr. katie backed away as he swiped at her, and Krill thought, once more, that she was smiling again. She turned to look at him, "Trying to shock the organs back into a state of functioning. It has the highest chance of working, but if it doesn't, we are going to have to get far more creative with our treatment.

He nodded, eyes wide.

*HIC*

"Oh No!" She exclaimed, "Dr. Krill, a glass of water, Stat."

He hurried over with a paper cup full of water, not sure what she expected. Katie took the water from his hand and handed it over to the captain, "Drink this as fast as you can."

He did as ordered, downing the water in under a few seconds.

"How is that?"

*HIC*

"Damn, another glass of water, Krill.""

He ran to fetch another watching as Dr. Katie made him gargle the water this time. He did so but it was to no avail.

*HIC-GRGL-ACK" he began coughing violently as he accidentally inhaled the water. Krill stood in great concern. Oh no if the human couldn't properly consume water, he would die!

"We still have options!" Katie announced as the captain continued to cough, "Did it work?"

*HIC*

"Damn."

"I require a paper bag."

Dr Krill ran to fetch the things as ordered. Dr katie then proceeded to lead them through a set of the strangest procedures Krill had ever witnessed. Breathing into a paper bag, pinching the nose and drinking a glass of water, breath holding, compressing the chest, tongue holding, and even messaging the carotid artery.

*HIC*

When that didn't work she resorted to a spoonful of sugar, which he nearly spewed everywhere as another aggressive contraction took him.

Krill stared in wide eyed shock and concern, "What do we do!"

Dr katie shook her head gravely, "I am afraid there is nothing else we can do."

At the doorway a hand raised, "I have an idea."

They turned to look back where Ramirez was standing. Krill frowned, "You are no medical professional. What could you possibly know about this."

Ramirez frowned, "I grew up in a neighborhood that was often afflicted by this horrible ailment. My abuela had a remedy that doctors don't believe in, but I know for a fact works."

Krill was not about to let him try out his untested remedy, but Dr. Katie sighed and motioned hi forward, "I suppose it couldn't hurt."

He walked over with a small smile on his face, "Oh I promise, it can." At that moment he turned on the spot and rather violently punched the captain in the gut."

He yelped in pain.

Krill let off an exclamation of disbelief and anger.

"What are you doing!"

Ramirez pulled back, and the group of humans stared at the captain with great intent.

He waited

And waited

And waited.

"Dude, your abuela is violent."

He shrugged, "It worked didn't it."

*HIC*

A chorus of disapproval went up around from the humans assembled.

Krill was freaking out, "What do we do! IT has no cure! Is he going to die? What are the next symptomes."

It was then that the collective human group burst into laughter and Krill was left to stare at them in confusion.

"What, what is going on!"

Giggling the captain wiped his mouth *HIC*, "Krill, I'm not sick."

"What do you mean your not sick!"

"I just have the hiccups because I ate too much too fast earlier."

Krill stared at them, "Wait.... This happens to you, OFTEN!"

"Well not all the time, but sometimes."

He stared at them incredulous, "What is it?"

*HIC*

The captain grimaced, "Its like when your diaphragm gets irritated and starts to spasm isn't it?"

Katie shrugged, "Something like that. It will go away on its own usually, and it isnt generally harmful unless they are chronic."

Dr Krill glowered over at the humans.

"You think this is funny, don't you?"

The captain grinned, "I mean it was kind of funny watching you freak out."

Krill turned on his heels in anger and stormed out.

"I HATE THE HUMAN BODY."

Captain Vir sighed, "Me too doc.... Me too."

*HIC*