On the first night on the Merry you slept fine in Nami's bed, there were only two beds and Nami and Robin where willing to share the other other one to give you space. Though the second night, the first day after setting sail, something just would not settle with you as if there was some pain you couldn't quite spot.

When Robin woke up she noticed you lifelessly staring at the ceiling, basically screaming you've had no sleep, though she didn't call attention to it knowing that you probably would have been asleep if you could. You soon followed after her while Nami was still asleep.

   It was early and you dared to put up with Sanji's nonsense, he was nice and reliable though also tad annoying in his 'over praising of the female sex in it's entirety' thing going on. You were glad though knowing the food will always be good and you'd never go hungry on the ship.

      The next few days the same things happened, building up a routine like system. Which included seeing Sanji with Robin in the morning as she left the girl's room, since you've still yet to receive sleep and had nothing else to do. Later in the day you would either follow Robin around, which she was quite fond of for some reason as long as you weren't too close, or go play with the 'kids.' The kids were Luffy, Usopp, and a reindeer creature named Chopper. This typically meant doing something silly like playing tag around the ship or pretending to be detectives and suspecting an innocent of a crime. By the end of the day you'd lay back in bed, aching from sleep loss.

   This was the fourth day out on sea. You sat next to the kids watching them as they tried to fish something from the waters below to pass time and just have more food in general as Luffy has stolen way too much food. You specifically were sitting next to Usopp, talking about anything that came in mind.

"So Usopp your trying to tell me you defeated a god."

"No I was the one who defeated that lightening freak!" Luffy argued back. You simply laughed at the childish behaviour of the two all while Chopper shuddered at the mention of this 'lightening freak god.' You of course didn't believe Usopp would be capable of such a thing though not really Luffy as well. You assumed what they've mentioned is true and that Luffy is actually a powerful person though you've yet to experience anything besides his playful and childlike nature.

"Is this what you guys normally do?" You again started with the first thing at the top of your mind.

"Yeah. Pretty much. Unless we run into trouble that is." Usopp answered your question while Luffy groaned about there being nothing to do.

Abruptly the ship shook back and forth, this caused you to fall off the railing and into the sea water. On the other side appeared to be a sea king roaring to attack the ship. From what you could see and hear, Luffy was gleaming at the something that was interesting to do, which of course was fighting the monster. Luckily Chopper or Usopp didn't fall in the water with you but you where stuck there in the rampaging waves of the sea as the sea king squirmed in the waters which was soon defeated though. Luffy indeed was strong if he defeated it on his own, and you could tell he did.

"Wait! Where is (Y/N)! My live where are you?!" Someone shouted, obviously being Sanji. Apparently Usopp already had an idea and poked his head over the railing you where previously sitting on.

"I'm here you dingus!" You shouted from the ocean water, not paying attention to Usopp and as you tried to seize Sanji's blabbering concerns.

You kept paddling to keep afloat, not sure exactly how to get back on the ship, until something strange happened and your muscles tensed and locked up sending you to sink in the calming waves. Usopp was quick to notice and jumped in the water almost immediately as Sanji soon came over to the side of the ship peaking at the situation, though he soon darted off after seeing.

Without a doubt Usopp saved you, then by the help of Luffy's devil fruit, you and him were pulled up to deck. Sanji, who disappeared, came back with a towel to drape over you.

"Thank you Sanji. You as well Luffy, and especially you Usopp." You thanked huddling the towel ever closer.

"What exactly happened? Why'd you suddenly sink like that?" Usopp asked in between pants and gasped as he exerted a lot of energy quickly to save your butt.

"I don't know... I just locked up and couldn't move, not out of shock or anything." You mumbled unhappy but also happy having to be saved. What you'd said made Chopper curious and had to check you over. You asked to have it private as it was awkward having the crew hover over you, Chopper was more then happy to agree. This which lead you to Chopper's medical office, the storage room.

   "So can you explain in detail what happened, anything from little to major. Has anything else like this happened before? Oh and has anything weird happened lately?" Chopper was bombarding with questions that you had not wanted to answer.

   "Look Chopper I know what it is, I just didn't want to mention it. To you or anyone else. I didn't want this to be a burden on you..."  You voice got lower and lower as you tried to hide yourself in the cover of your knees.

   "That nonsense! Just tell me so I can help." Chopper went into full concerned and doctor mode

   "I haven't slept since the first night I've got here and-"

   "Wait what! I couldn't even tell, you don't look it!" Chopper seemed shocked at this fact.

   "Yeah I don't feel tired, at all. That's not it though. That's only a small part of it." With this the mood in the room got darker, depressing. "A while ago I was checked over by a doctor, in fact, many. They've diagnosed me with something they've no clue how to cure. Little by little my muscles are disintegrating, I've missed so much sleep, my organs are giving out, my taste even disappears completely sometimes, and my vision turns dark sometimes as if I'm on the verge of going unconscious. It has to be multiple different illnesses but so far not one of them can be fixed..." You where trembling by now, crying as if everything was getting worse. "I was going to see my parents before any of it got worse so I could at least see them before I die, they know nothing of it!" Unintentionally you started to yell in panic and despair, wallowing as everything got worse. "I didn't want to burden you with these news!  It's a doctors shame to not be able to cure someone! I didn't want to put this weight on you either but this weight is getting worse... I'm trembling... Being crushed... Because I simply don't want to die!" You spilled everything, right then and right there. It was true, you didn't want to die, at least so soon which drove past your barricade of keeping everything relating to it a secret.