"Um, Miss, are you okay?" a soft voice asked. 

That was when I realised I wasn't alone, and I lifted my head to see who it was. It was a girl that was probably a little younger than me, about 14 or 15, and she was looking uncertainly at me. 

"Who are you?" I stammered. The carriage rocked softly, making me feel even sicker. 

"Wan En," the girl said. She bowed to me and elaborated, "I'm to be your servant! Please tell me what I can do for you, Miss!"

"W-what is the palace like?" I asked her. Maybe she could prepare me for it. "A-am I going to be married to the Emperor?"

Wan En looked rather shocked, and quickly said, "No! Miss, you are simply going to stay on the palace grounds and if His Honoured Majesty likes you, you will be promoted to one of his 121 women."

"What?" I exclaimed. No one had told me that. If I'd known, I would never have given up my entire life for this! Just to stay there and rot in the palace? I turned and pulled aside the yellow curtain; outside, there were similar carriages in front and behind me. I knew that they were all girls like me. Maybe they'd been tricked into coming too, thinking they would at least enjoy riches and good food in the palace.

Wan En said uneasily, her eyes darting to and fro, "Miss, there are 9 levels of...women in the palace. The first level is the Empress Zhangsun." Wan En said her name with respect, and I pricked my ears up at that. Maybe this Empress would be nice. "The second level has four consorts. The 3rd, 4th, 5th and 6th levels have 9 women each. There are gaps here," she added, smiling at me. "There are currently vacancies in the 4th level."

As if that made it any better! I felt like I was falling down the well at the back of my home. It was crazy. Perhaps I should have tried harder to learn more about palace things from Li Tai, who had once spent a month in the kitchens, teaching the servants to make her famous tea. But it was all so complicated...

Wan En continued. "The 7th, 8th and 9th levels have 27 women each. There are also vacancies here," she said brightly. "Miss, if you make it into even the 9th level, you will be called a Selected Lady. It is a good title!"

Uh...no it wasn't.

"I'm Wang Min," I decided to change the topic and introduce myself. "Please just call me that."

Her eyes dilated in horror. "No, no! Miss, it is not proper. We have to respect the system at all times."

"Then tell me," I said finally, annoyed (but not at Wan En, she was too sweet. I was just angry with everything else), "Tell me why I, a lowly village girl, am going to the palace."

By social status, I should have stayed in my village to marry a local boy, and we would have stayed at that socio-economic status for the rest of our lives. It was strange that I would be elevated so suddenly to have a chance to live in the palace. Of course no one had dared to ask, but since it was just Wan En and I in the carriage, I felt that I could ask her that. Although she was younger than me, she already seemed more knowledgeable.

Wan En lifted up a cloth to reveal a box of pastries, and she passed me the box. "Miss, you might be hungry."

"Thank you. But can you answer me?"

She dropped her voice and leaned in, and so did I. "Miss, this is just palace gossip among us servants, but I heard that the Emperor is searching for pretty ladies. He wants them to be clever and pretty and he thinks village girls could be just as smart as the city girls. So he sent out lots of people to search for pretty, clever girls."

"That doesn't make sense," I frowned. 

"Yes, I know," Wan En giggled. "I guess that's why I wasn't selected, I am not clever enough to understand his logic."

"Well, me too! I wish I never came," I sighed, chewing on a pastry. Okay, the pastries tasted so amazing. They were flaky and soft, with chewy melon paste inside. I loved them. 

"No, Miss, you're probably clever. And you're so pretty," Wan En gushed. "You have a small face, and pale skin, and you also have very large eyes with long eyelashes."

"Oh," I said, surprised. "Thank you." My pale skin had been because I'd spent more time doing chores in the dark interior of my home than outdoors in the fields. Mother had always fussed over me to wear long sleeved clothes when I was outdoors, too, so perhaps that was why I wasn't tanned like most village girls. Everyone prized pale skin here. 

"Do you want one?" I asked, holding the box out to her.

She paled. "Oh, no thank you, Miss. I couldn't. Even though you do not have an official title yet, you're still higher ranked than me...what am I doing? I can't talk to you informally like that..." she turned away quickly, hiding her face in her skirts.

"Oh, Wan En! Stop hiding your face in your skirt. Don't worry about it, it's just you and me," I said kindly, flapping my hands in front of my face to get her attention.

She laughed. "Thank you, Miss. I've never tried this pastry before."

"Me either. It's my first time. Try the pink one, it's so good," I said enthusiastically. I felt like I had a friend, and that was a comforting feeling to have. 

Wan En gasped. "Oh! Miss! I forgot! You have to change into this before you enter the palace."

When I saw the dress, I backed away quickly. "No thanks."

---

Of course I changed into the dress. Wan En told me that everyone had to wear proper dresses and my village dress was rather torn, so I allowed her to help me into it in the shaking, rocky carriage. It wasn't proper, but I had never been proper, so it was okay. The dress was soft pink silk, falling in waves down to my feet. It did make me feel pretty. 

Wan En was a miracle worker. She managed to apply makeup while the carriage moved, and while I grimaced. Although there wasn't a mirror, I felt assured that she had made me look pretty, and so we sat in comfortable silence until the carriage drew to a stop.

"You can do it," she nodded encouragingly to me, giving me a shy smile. 

Nervously, I nodded back. I had no choice but to go on. And I decided that, since I was here, and since my heart had been broken already, I would make it into one of the 9 Levels of the Emperor's women. I would make my journey here worth it. I couldn't just come here to live and do nothing. If I had a higher position, I would be able to have more freedom, right?

I stepped out of the carriage and my jaw dropped. A big palace stood in front of me, glittering in the sunlight. The gardens were large and expansive, and so beautiful. There were flowers everywhere. I loved flowers, and this soothed my nerves a little. 

Behind me, the carriage door opened and another girl stepped out, wearing a light green dress. I gasped. She was pretty, and it was obvious she has taken care of her skin. It was positively white and glowing, something the Chinese take as a sign of beauty.

She glanced at me, and I saw what I was feeling reflected in her eyes: fear, apprehension. And something else. She didn't want to be here. We both started walking to the big doors. Guards were standing there, and they nodded to us when Chancellor Wu flashed his identity document. I wondered where my older brother Wang Kai was. From Wan En's descriptions, however, it looked like I wouldn't be meeting him at all. 

The girl behind me asked, "Is the Emperor coming to see us?"

Chancellor Wu looked shocked. "No, no, no! And address him as His Honoured Majesty! His Honoured Majesty does not waste his time on you."

The girl flushed and looked down.

"This way, please," said a court lady at that moment. She wore yellow robes which looked graceful and natural on her, unlike on me.

We followed her, and Chancellor Wu left us. The court lady led us to a building at the back of the palace. It was made of stone, or jade, and looked pretty unwelcoming. As we neared it, I could hear the sound of laundry, and women chattering. I glanced at the other girl, and I saw her looking nervous too. I smiled at her.

Tentatively, she grinned back. Her face looked even prettier when she smiled. I felt like an uneducated, ugly girl next to her. Of course, I was pretty uneducated- I dropped out of school when I was 14, two years ago. It's considered long for a girl, though.

I suddenly saw it. It's Liang Wen's smile. That crooked smile. I stumbled, and she grabbed my arm. "Are you okay?"

I nodded, thanking her in the rough dialect of my province before I remembered that it wasn't spoken here. To my surprise, she answered in the dialect.

"You come from Guizhou too?" I asked in surprise.

 "Yeah."

It was strange, but once she confirmed that her hometown was just a few miles from mine, I felt relieved. This girl felt like the closest thing to home right now. The little girl in me just wanted to cling onto her hand and walk with her through the palace, which seemed big and awfully scary. 

We paused in front of the building, and the woman in the yellow robes looked over all of us. It wasn't just this girl and me following her, you see. There were more than two dozen young girls, all in different coloured dresses, but in the same style- flowy and elegant, with a thick strap running around our waists. 

"I'm Concubine Lin, one of the 9 才人," she declared, her voice ringing with authority. I recognised that as one of the ladies in Level 6. Level 6 suddenly seemed unattainable and faraway. This lady Lin was so refined and confident. She handled the crowd of young girls with ease. I could never do that.

(才人cái rén = Talented. That was what the ladies of level 6 were called.)

"From now on, after you enter the Jade Building, you have to listen to me. All of you will be employed in different duties, and I will personally give some of you lessons on etiquette, which some people are sorely lacking in." Her eyes rested on the girl I'd just been talking to, then moved away. But it was too late. All the other girls had seen it, and my new friend's face burned in humiliation. 

"You came here to perform duties for His Honoured Majesty, not to have a fun time. You should all be honoured and grateful to have this chance to serve him, and carry out the duties I give you without complaint."

There were faint murmurs of assent. I could tell the girl next to me was still embarrassed, so I reached down and squeezed her hand silently. She squeezed back, and I heard her sniffle a little. Later, I would try to help her feel better. Now was not the time. I sensed that if I did anything other than listen to Lady Lin, I would be severely punished.

"His Majesty will most likely not give you any attention, so don't worry about it, alright? I've had lots of new girls complaining about how he never sees them. It's just like that. Get used to life here."

The girl next to me blinked. "So...he's not coming? Then why are we here?"

Instantly, all eyes turned to her. I quickly slipped my hand out of hers, wishing suddenly I was anywhere but next to her. She shouldn't have said that, Concubine Lin had already explained that we were here just to do some duties...