thirty five

    Michael parked next to Calum's car in the elementary school parking lot, almost hitting Cal's car in the process.

    Michael still wasn't the best at parking.

    He hopped from his truck, meeting his husband by the sidewalk. Mike leant in, kissing his cheek. "Hi, how are you?"

    "I don't want to do this," he sighed, looking down at his feet.

    Both men were in their work clothes—a button down and slacks, their ties laying in the passenger seat of their individual cars.

    "We've gotta do it, though," Michael responded.

    June's teacher called a parent/teacher meeting. It was nice for Calum to finally not have to go to these nonsense meetings alone. It was nice that Michael was legally his three kid's parents, even though that's been on their emergency cards for the last eight months.

    Cal started walking towards the front doors, his hand entwined with Michael's. "What do you think they're going to say?"

    "I don't know, Babe. I'm sure it's gonna be something good, you know? She's a great kid."

    He shook his head, "They don't call parent/teacher meetings over anything good, Michael." Calum squeezed his palm before letting go, paging them into the front office.

    "Don't freak yourself out, it's gonna be fine." Michael walked behind him, smiling at the secretary he recognized.

    Calum signed both of them in, leaving the office without another word. Michael followed Calum down the hallways, he seemed to know the school so well. Cal had three kids go through this very elementary school, so maybe that's why.

    Michael was still getting used to the whole being-dad thing. He wanted to stay the cool dad, forever.

    June's teacher, an old lady named Ms. Bennings, was waiting for them. She had a happy cheerful smile, one that made Michael, too, smile.

    Calum, though, was more annoyed than anything.

    "How are you two this morning?" She asked as she sat them all down at a circular table.

    Cal and Mike barely fit in the small, plastic, colorful chairs. They made it work but it felt like aerobics.

    "We're doing alright," Michael answered, not letting grouchy Calum respond.

    "That's good, that's good," she said as she opened up a file. "So, June is a very smart, very intriguing girl." Ms. Bennings turned a packet for their eyes showing all her advanced test scores and literature levels. "I'm not concerned about that type of development."

    Calum turned his head towards Michael, his eyes begging Michael to just leave already. Cal didn't want sit through another meeting where they'd tell him his youngest had something off in her mind.

    Mike caught his eye, subtly shaking his head.

    "I'm sure you remember the last time we spoke, Mr. Hood," she said, her doe-like brown eyes looking at the annoyed man, "I was concerned about the emotional and social side of her."

    "She doesn't like talking to people, I didn't like talking to people."

    Michael placed his hand on Cal's thigh, getting him to shush up. "Do you think it's more than just being shy?" He asked, moving the papers back towards June's teacher.

    "I obviously can't diagnose her with anything, that's not my job," she spoke kindly, trying to be as sensitive to the matter as possible, "I see lots of early signs of severe anxiety and OCD in her. That's very curable, but I highly recommend you two take her for testing."

    "There's nothing wrong with June," Calum said, his jaw clenched.

    "Calum," Michael cooed, squeezing his thigh, "You need to listen. You know there's something not completely right with June, that's nothing bad."

    He shook his head, "There's nothing wrong with her," he repeated.

    Michael sighed, still looking at his close-minded husband. He turned back to Ms. Bennings, giving her a smile. "I think Calum and I need to talk about this privately."

    Michael and Calum didn't talk on their way out from school. They gave each other a peck on the lips before getting into their own cars and going back to work. They didn't talk for that afternoon, not even at dinner.

    They didn't talk until the evening, a few minutes past ten. Michael leant over the counter, making sure he didn't miss a spot while shaving. He knew it was better to shave in the morning but he didn't want to lose any more sleep.

    Cal sat on the closed lid of their toilet, moisturizing his legs and feet. "About today," the younger man started, not looking up at his husband.

    "You're gonna actually talk now?" Michael asked, hints of passive aggression underneath each word.

    "She's my baby."

    "And she's miserable." Michael put down his electric razor and turned around, facing his oddly smooth husband. "Listen, if we can make her life even the tiniest bit easer, why wouldn't we do it?"

    "I don't want her to feel bad about herself. I don't want her to feel any different than the other kids." Calum closed his moisturizer, placing it back up on the shelf. He tucked his feet underneath his body as he looked up at his lover once again. "I want her to be happy, I just don't really want to hear her diagnoses."

    Michael gestured over towards their bed, signaling they'll finish their conversation there. Cal followed him into the sheets, getting under the golden silk and placing his hands on Michael's freshly shaved jaw. He found comfort in Michael's presence.

    "I know it's a lot of thinking," Michael said, "But I think it's important."

    Cal shrugged his shoulders, his eyes still fanning over Michael's features. "I don't want to think about something being wrong with my daughter."

    "There's nothing wrong with her, she's just a little different. She hates the color brown, she needs the doors open six inches, she needs the room dark at 9 PM and then light at 6 AM. It's the little quirks about her that make her June."

    "Why should we change that about her, then?"

    "Because she's going to grow up and it may get worse. We should stop it now before it turns into something unmanageable." Michael rested his hands on Calum's waist, curling his fingers soothingly into his tan skin. "I've worked with teenagers for far too long, I know what happens. Let's just get her tested, let's see what that does."

    Calum knew that part of loving his three kids was accepting who they were.    

    He promised to try, then kissed Mike's nose. They were left in a silence that soon led to sleep.

    Michael woke up to a few Twitter notifications. This caused him to compulsively stalk through his feed.

    He laid in bed, looking at the newest photo Matty posted of his family. Matt and Luke were in bed, Nolan laying on Luke's bare chest. Luke and Nolan were both sound asleep, their eyes closed and mouths parted open.

    Matty had a smirk on his face in the photo, his own bare chest was littered with tattoos.

    Michael ran his thumb over the screen, not understanding why he wasn't enough for Luke. Mike remembers trying so hard—too hard—to make everything work. He did everything in his capability and it still wasn't enough.    

    Was it really only the timing, or was it something more?

    Michael wanted to be over Luke, he didn't want to feel anything for him anymore.

    Mike closed Twitter and turned off his phone. He rolled onto his back, looking at his sleeping husband. His beautiful husband. Michael had his family now, there was nothing else he needed.

    He doesn't need Luke, that's final.

Michael and Calum are married and I am so glAD you all get to share this moment with me.

Do you think Michael is actually over Luke?

Thoughts on June?

Thoughts on Calum?