Forty-Two
The house was empty.
Nothing but silence greeted Ellie as she took the first step through the door and found herself in the open kitchen. Cabinet doors were open, shelves emptied down to the last can of food.
Nothing had been left behind except the furniture and some other things like a toaster, large toys and boxes that served no purpose except for storing things.
As you entered the smell of wood and dust hit you in the face. In fact, the house must have been abandoned for quite a while. Every single one of your steps left a mark on the floor.
Your eyes wandered through the open living area. It was a nice house, a little rustic with many wooden elements, metal and fabrics.
Curtains danced with the wind that made its way inside through an opened window. Ellie disappeared for a moment, probably to check the other rooms.
Even though there could have been hope, deep down you knew that no one awaited her. No one was there to greet her, to welcome her back home.
The house felt abandoned down to the core. It wasn't a home no more, if it ever was one. Now it was just an empty shell, a place to spent the night safely only to move on the next morning.
Ellie reappeared again, stopped in the hallway and let her eyes wander along the walls. Her fingers twitched, then let the tips run over the surface of a cabinet. A layer of dust made her fingers turn grey.
You watched. Not a word crossed your lips. This wasn't your moment or your grief. Ellie needed to see, needed to understand.
But you wanted her to know that she wasn't alone. Perhaps she had lost a lot. But you were still here, with her. And you wanted, no, needed her to know.
Again, she disappeared in another room. This time, you followed her but came to a halt in the frame of the door. With your arms crossed you leaned against the wood, the green paint started to fade already.
Ellie sat on a chair by the window. A crib stood at the wall opposite of her. Small stars and hearts decorated the green colour.
The window was open and made the room feel colder.
And there was a guitar.
Ellie stared at it with a kind of look that spoke more than a thousand words could have. Her eyes trembled and she seemed like she was about to cry once more.
But as her eyelids fell shut and a deep sigh escaped her throat her entire body relaxed. With both hands she wiped her face.
Then she picked up the guitar and started to play. A few strings created sounds, loose threats that did not tie together into a melody.
Ellie's cut off fingers moved, just the way they would have if she were still able to play. But instead everything sounded so unfinished. Cut off.
Abby had taken this from her.
Your eyes wandered along the instrument. It was a nice guitar, dark wood with lighter stains in the middle and a few new screws that had been replaced.
A white emblem decorated the neck, just below Ellie's fingers.
A firefly.
Ellie played a few more strings. Then she stopped. Sadness darkened her eyes. She did not look like herself, not really.
Now she was just an empty shell of what she used to be. Her eyes closed and she put the guitar back in its place, leaning it against the windowsill.
A soft breeze made the white curtains caress the wood.
"It was Joel's.", she said and looked up.
A layer of tears shimmered in her eyes. But she smiled. For some reason Ellie smiled softly. Perhaps because she looked at you and found someone she could rely on.
Someone she wanted to rely on.
Your heart grew heavy in your chest. It felt like thousands of knives tore flesh and bones apart to draw blood. As much as despair could get.
"Do you want to take it?", you asked and let out a deep breath.
You didn't want to sigh, didn't want to show just how painful this was for you too. It was the beginning of the end, one final moment until the journey came to an end.
You were about to part ways. Although you had to admit that you felt a kind of relief that there was one more pathway left.
Confused, Ellie looked at the guitar and frowned.
"Where?", she asked and got up from the chair to meet you halfway through the room.
Chucking, you tilted your head and raised one eyebrow.
"To Jackson, silly.", you answered. "You're going there, aren't you? To look for Dina."
Ellie stared at you.
Green collided with (E/C) and created an entirely new shade. Sadness and trauma combined and created something that seemed an odd outcome.
Stability.
Safety.
You had found a save haven in Ellie. And she had found stability in you at a time that had been nothing but uncertain for her.
Both of you had struggled. And that struggle had brought you together only for you to grow closer because of it.
And now it was time to cut the ties, to remove the stitches and move on.
"I'm not...", Ellie shook her head slightly.
Confused, your eyes widened.
"What do you mean?", you stood up straight to grab her hands with yours. "You're going to Jackson. To be safe. And to be with Dina."
Ellie's fingers tensed in your grip. Her eyes jumped over her shoulder, back to the guitar and then moved on to the crib.
"Dina didn't want to wait for me.", as she raised her eyes again to meet yours she smiled softly. "And it's not right to blame her."
You swallowed the urge to be a know-it-all and just nodded. This was not your place to tell her what she did and did not want.
It was a decision and she had made it.
"But... you'll go to be save in the city, won't you?", you asked carefully.
Again, she shook her head.
"There's nothing here for me.", she whispered and freed her hands to grab yours. "I think... it's time. I want to be better. Let's move on."
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