Isang mahigpit na yakap ang nakuha ko mula sa kanya. Pinag titinginan din kami ng ibang costumers at staffs ng shop ko. Nang maka hiwalay ako ay ang magaganda agad nitong ngiti ang bumungad sa akin. Kasama ng brown nitong mga mata at malalalim na dimples sa pisngi. Ang tangkad din nito hindi kagaya ng dati. Mas lumaki din ang pangangatawan pero mas mukha itong bumata.

"How are you? I miss you, you look so good now." The calmness in his voice didn't change kahit tuwang tuwa na sya. May mga naka tingin na sa kanya at may nag bubulungan habang kinikilig. "How long was the last time we've seen each other?"

"I.. I guess six years ago?" Kinakabahan ako. Kung andito sya  baka naman..

"He's not with me." He said as if he's reading my mind. Nawala ang kaba ko sa sinabi nya. "Don't worry. How are you? Is this your shop, I'm thinking you'll have a boutique of gowns instead of this." Napa ngiti ako sa kanya dahil sa pagiging mahinahon nya habang naka ngiti din sakin. He really knew me.

"Sino nag sabing wala ako non. I have my boutique but not here." Sabay kindat ko. I miss him. The Sweet Baby Guy of their group.

Tumawa lang sya saka ako muling niyakap. That is when a voice came. Nagka hiwalay kami ni Mira at agad ko nilingon iyon. That's just a word 'Mommy' pero alam ko na kung sino iyon. Isaiah is standing at the entrance with Beau, carrying his bag. I saw the shock in my sister's face as she stare at Mira. There is this unexplainable look in my son's face. He seems not happy in what he saw. It took almost five second for Beau to recover and before I knew it, she's already wailing like a kid and let herself get carried by Mira. Tumawa lang ang huli kasabay ng pag buhat nya dito na mas lalong nag bigay ng kumosyon sa mga costumers ng shop.

"Oh my god! Kailan kapa naka uwi? I miss you Kuya!" Tuwang tuwa si Beau at saka sya binaba. Naka ngiti lang si Mira sa kanya na para bang di kakapaniwala na dalaga na ngayon ang inaalagaan nya noon. "How's Japan? You've been working there for years, tapos di'ka manlang makapasyal dito sa Pinas."

"You didn't change huh? Still the easy go lucky girl. I've been staying here for a week now."

Naramdaman ko ang pag hawak sa braso ko. Niyakap ko si Isaiah saka ito hinalikan sa pisngi. The seriousness in his eyes didn't change as he stare at Mira. Nailing nalang ako saka sya pinaharap sa akin. Nag tatanong ang mga mata nya habang naka titig sa akin. Napansin na rin di Mira ang anak ko, at di na ako nag taka ng ngumiti ito at saka pinaka titigan si Isaiah.

We decided to have a dinner. The whole time ay tahimik si Isaiah habang yung dalawa ay nag kukwentuhan. Paminsan minsan ay nakiki sali ako pero madalas ay inaasikaso ko ang anak ko.

I hand Isaiah the tabled napkin on top of the table. We're done eating at about to have dessert. He wave his hand and seems Mira saw it kaya natawa ito.

"I've been thinking about this since earlier. Your son looked like you except from his eyes." Mira

"I know Mira." Ismid ko.

"So, Kuya kelan ang balik mo sa Japan?" Beau

"I don't know. I'm planning to stay here for two months or less. I miss here and six years is enough to change country." Dumating na yung dessert. "Thank you.. Beau can you get me a water over there." Utos nito. Beau frowned and Mira laugh. "Kidding."

Mira don't actually need to stand up and get some water pero ginawa nya parin. Nailing lang ako dahil hindi parin sya nag babago. Sinipa ko sa ilalim ang heels ng kapatid ko na titig na titig kay Mira habang naka talikod ito at kumakausap ng waitress.

"What?" Maang nya.

"Are you still into him?" Di makapaniwalang tanong ko.

"He's handsome. Rich. He's also a good man and the girls woo him for that. Pero parang beyond perfection na si Kuya Mira and I know he won't see me other than a sister." There's this sadness in her voice while saying it. Alam ko naman na simula highschool sya ay si Mira na talaga ang love interest nya. Iyon nga lang Mira already declared it that he only see her as a sister and nothing more.

"Mommy who is he?" Said the little man beside me. Also looking at Mira. "Is he your friend? I never see him before."

"Yes, mahal ko. Matagal na kami mag kaibigan, simula pa lang nung highschool ako." Naka ngiti kong sagot.

"Do he really have to touch you?" I slightly pinch his nose na agad nya naman inalis. Mas lumalim ang pagkaka kunot ng noo nya. "Stop it Mommy."

"He's a close friend, mahal ko. I want you to be a good boy to him. He's kind."

"It didn't answer my question." Irap ni Isaiah.

Sa gilid ko pigil ang tawa ni Beau sa amin. Naupo na si Mira at nakipag kwentuhan. He tried to talk to Isaiah but he seems distant to him. Ano ba ang aasahan ko sa anak ko. Suplado ito at hindi approachable. Just like his father.

"I've been staying here for a week and I haven't tour around. Minsan kung may free time kayo gumala naman tayo." Biglang sabi ni Mira. He's wiping his lips using napkin and smile to us.

"I would love to do that Kuya pero kasi medyo hectic ang sched ko. Just one please I will drop everything for my hunky-hotsie-pochie ming-ming." Beau grinned as she stare at Mira. I know that look but Mira's oblivious about it.

"You and your long sweet endearment to me." Mira shrug while smiling. "If you're busy then I can't just drag you out Beau but Conan will give some time for me right?" Sabay tingin sakin nito.

Natigilan ako sa inosentemg ngiti ni Mira. Kahit kailan talaga napaka galing mang possess ng taong to. And Yeah. Di ko alam bakit masipag mag bigay ng endearment ang kapatid ko.

"Ahm--" di pa man ako tapos Isaiah cut in.

"Mom you'll come to my school for my practice di ba? I'll be joining our charity activity." kasalukuyan nyang hinihiwa ang cake nya at pasimpleng tumingin patagilid kay Mira saka umirap. "I want you there to check for my piano practice."

"Oh. Sayang naman busy ka pala. Maybe some other time will do." Mira answer with a smile in his lips. "Yung di ka na masyadong busy para buong araw tayo-"

"Mom I forgot I have to do my homework. Can we go home now cuz my favorite cartoon will air anytime soon." I'm looking intently at Isaiah who's now murdering his cake.

"Isaiah Medean." babala ko dahil napapansin ko ang pagiging snob nya kay Mira.

"What?" Sagot nya sabay ungos ng mapalingon kay Mira.

"Oh gosh baby. Ang sungit mo ngayong araw. Are you feeling okay?" Beau said while touching my son's face.

"I can see 'him' so much in your son." Mira whisper in my ear and I guess that is the cue.

Binagsak ni Isaiah ang hawak na tinidor at tumayo. He grab my hand and glare at me and Mira.

"It's enough." sabay hatak sakin ng anak ko." I want my Mom back. Umalis na tayo marami pa akong gagawin."

Narinig ko ang pag singhap ni Beau at mahinang tawa ni Mira. Nag paalam kami na mauuna na.

When we get home hinarap ko si Isaiah.

"Why did you do that?" May riin sa boses ko. "Hindi ba sinabi ko na kaibigan ko ang Tito Mira-"

"He is not!" Sagot nya.

"Kailan pa naging ganito ang ugali mo Isaiah? Hindi ka na nakikinig sa akin and you're acting like a grown up man. Hindi tama yung ginawa mo kanina. Pag nag kita kayo ng Tito Mira mo gusto ko mang hingi ka ng dispensa." Mariin kong sabi bago tumalikod.

"No. I won't wala akong ginawa Mommy." Mariin ding sagot ng anak ko.

Nang humarap ako naka krus ang braso sa dibdib nya at mag kasalubong ang mga kilay.

"I will never apologize to anyone!" He answer as emotion slips away from his eyes and leave it with cold stare.

"Isaiah!" galit na tawag ko sa kanya.

"No Mom. Never. I can feel something towards him that I never like since the first time I saw him. And don't lie. I can see the way you look at him." A slip of pain crossed his eyes and returns to cold one. "I can see how much happy your are.. Baka nga may kinalaman sya sa tatay ko." Nang mag angat sya ng tingin. Galit iyon ang meron sa kanya. "O baka sya ang tatay ko?"

Pakiramdam ko natuyuan ako ng dugo habang pinag mamasdan ang anak ko na pimasok mg library room.

I can see him so much in your son.

Oh God no. Please no.

Days have past without Isaiah talking to me. Sinubukan ko sya kausapin pero mailap sya. He's only six for God's sake! Pero ito, nahihirapan ako na makausap ang anak ko.

Nilagay ko sa bag ni Isaiah ang sandwich na hinanda ko when I saw him walking towards the ref. He took a bottle of juice and look at me sideways. His turquoise gray eyes met mine and I shiver from the coldness of it.

"Mahal ko.." Tawag ko saka lapit sa kanya. Pinag pantay ko ang mukha namin saka ito hinalikan ng masuyo sa noo. "Do your best okay? I'll be at your school later for your practice."

"No. I won't participate in my school." Sabay lagpas nito sakin. Kumunot ang noo ko.

"You told me last time."

"I lied. Hindi ako sasama sa ganon Mom. Never."

The whole drive was deafening. Nakaramdam lang ako ng ginhawa ng humalik sakin si Isaiah at pumasok na ng room nya. Bumalik ako sa kotse saka nag drive papuntang mall. Nag libot-libot lang ako duon hanggang mahinto ako sa isang jewelry boutique.

I saw a white gold bracelet that can carved names.

"Good morning ma'am. May nagustuhan ba kayo sa mga designs for the week?" I smile to the lady and nod.

I pointed the white gold bracelet. "That one. Pakilagyan din ng pangalan."

"Of course ma'am. It cost-"

"Its on me." pakiramdam ko natulos ako sa kinatatayuan ko. I saw him hand a platinum card.

Anxiety covered my chest. In instance tumingala ako just to meet his turquoise gray eyes. Walang emosyon ang mga iyon pero pakiramdam ko dinala na naman ako sa Russia dahil sa lamig ng pagkaka titig nya.

Sinibukan ko hamigin ang sarili pero di oo magawa. I immediately took thousands of bill from my pouch. Di ko alam kung sapat iyon bit I don't care. Mabilis nilapag ko sa harap nya iyon saka umalis ng boutique.

My legs are shaking. Ramdam ko yung malalamig na pawis katawan ko at pag lukob ng takot at galit sa kalamnan ko. Pag dating sa parking lot ay akmang bubuksan ko ang kotse ng may humaklot sakin.

I gasp from fear.

"Where in the fuck you're going?" I can feel his fingers digging my arm.

"Let me go Saiu." may riin sa boses ko. "Let me go cause it has nothing to do with you."

Nag dilim ang mukha nya at marahas akong sinandal sa sasakyan. Sinubukan ko sya itulak pero diko kaya. He's a tall man. Kahit matangkad ako he's still towering me.

"Well, well." i gulp. "It doesn't matter. I can find you anyway."

Hinugot ko lahat ng lakas ko at malakas syang itinulak. Huminga ako ng malalim at sinalubong ang nag yeyelo nyang tingin kasabay ng pag tagis ng bagang ko.

"Ayaw na kita makita naiintindihan mo? There's no reason for us to see each other again Emperial." i tried not to remember the times where we were still happy. The relationship where everyone finds it perfect. Where Saiu Emperial was the man in her dreams.

I loved him so damn much but my love wasn't enough to stay by his side.

"Are you sure you don't want to see me again? Baka naman may itinatago ka pa sakin Conan." There's this grin in his lips. Those red soft lips that I loved kissing before.

I can feel my heart thumping hard. May alam  ba sya?

Of course he's Saiu Emperial! Just like his name he has his own imperial and has lots of connection. Natural malalaman nito ang lahat tungkol sa kanya.

Then what about my son? "What about Isaiah?" Supposedly sakin ko lang itatanong iyon but Saiu was stunned and stare at me in confuse.

Mabilis pa sa alas kuwatro na naka lapit uli ito saka ako hinawakan sa panga. Sa higpit non ay halos maluha ako. Nararamdmaan kona yung takot sa buong katawan ko habang madilim ang titig nya sakin.

I can feel my eyes heating. Don't tell me I'm still scared of him. I tried my best the past years to pick every shattered pieces of my self when he broke me. For my son. For my family. And for my friends who was there to support me.

I can feel his breath fanning my face. "Who the fuck is he?" he dangerously ask.

My voice cracked. "Y-you fucking don't care."

Mas hinigpitan nya ang hawak sa panga ko kaya napa hiyaw ako sa sakit.

"Damn you!" Sigaw ko habang nilalayo ang kamay nya sakin pero di ko kaya. "Damn you Emperial!"

"I'm asking you Conan.. Answer me or I will look for him and shot him down." pakiramdam ko binuhusan ako ng malamig na tubig sa sinabi nya.

Umiling ako sa takot at naramdaman ko na ang luha ko na bumagsak. "W-wag please.. W-wag. Nakikiusap ako h-hayaan mo na ako.." Hikbi ko. Nawala na lahat ng tapang tapangan ko. "H-hayaan mo na kami."

"You think I will let that?" magaspang nyang bulong sakin. I can feel his breath on my face. "Never. I let you slip away before. I set you free. Now its payback time."

Nawala lahat ng insibisyon sa katawan ko ng lumaoat ang labi nya sa leeg ko at mariin yon sinipsip. I pushed him away. Nang magka layo kami ay padaskol nya akong binitawan saka tumalikod.

Agad ako sumakay ng sasakyan ko at umalis sa lugar na yon. I can feel my system trembling in fear.

How come I forgot? He's Saiu Emperial and he has all the access to make things in his way.