Jean could feel the elasticity of his cheeks stretch to their limit as his mother pinched them in between her fingers.

He pulls away as he looks around to ensure no one was looking at such an embarrassing moment. "Mom, you can't keep doing that." He groans as he rubs at his face.

His mother had a habit of pinching his cheeks when he was younger. Back then, he had a lot more baby fat on his face so it didn't hurt as much. "I'm sorry," She responds sheepishly. "I'm just so happy to see you."

Since his arrival back in Eldia, the poor woman refused to leave his side. Considering he was no longer part of the royal guard, he didn't have an excuse to run away either.

He, along with his mother, stood at the center plaza that had the perfect view of the castle. A crowd had begun to form little by little as the time got closer.

"I still can't believe this happening." His mother says as she takes in the crowd. "Coronation day."

Jean nods. "I didn't see this happening for years. The king and queen were always in such good health."

She agrees. "Forget it being so soon. Let's discuss who it is being crowned this evening."

He wipes at his nose that had a slight drip from the cold. "Yeah, I didn't see that coming either."

Before she can say anything else, Julien appears beside them too. He had a giant turkey leg in his hand and his teeth tore into the tender meat as he stared up at the castle. "Big day, huh?"

Jean looks at him from the side. Yet another person he couldn't seem to escape.

Although his brother and his mother seemed to be everywhere he turned, they surprisingly have yet to meet. He had been lucky enough until now to not have to deal with both at the same time.

"Mom, this is-" He doesn't get to finish his sentence when his mother springs forward. "My God." She gasps. "I know exactly who you are."

"You do?" The two brothers say simultaneously as they blink in shock.

She smacks her lips. "Of course I do! You both are the spitting image of your father." She then approaches the boy and hugs him as if she had already met him years ago.

As she embraces him, Julien stares at Jean in confusion. Jean shrugs. He was already used to his mother's friendly nature. She hugged strangers all the time.

However, this man wasn't a stranger. He was the child born from his own father's infidelity. The child that caused his father to pack up and move miles away, leaving his family behind to fend for themselves.

Jean would've assumed his mother would've had some pent up resentment for the child that caused her family to break apart. Regardless, she still hugged the boy as if he were anyone else. After all, it wasn't his fault.

When she releases Julien, he holds out a bag from a local shop toward Jean's direction. "Here. Dad told me you like omelettes."

Jean looks down at the bag that floats in the space between him and his brother. "Your dad. Not mine."

"Right." Julien realizes his choice of words may not have been the most clever. Jean takes the bag anyway considering he was starving. "Thanks, anyway."

"Does that mean your father is here?" His mother asks, slight anxiousness slipping from her tongue.

Julien shakes his head. "I'm here with my wife and daughter. My in-laws are here as well. Queen Historia informed us of everything and insisted we accompanied her over here."

Julien then looks at Jean. "He's too scared to show his face around here."

Jean snorts. His first thought was that the man was far too embarrassed to show his face here considering many people in Eldia knew of his indecency.

Julien, however, confirms otherwise. "He's terrified of your girlfriend."

Jean almost busts out laughing. He found it funny that anyone would be scared of someone so kind and generous.

Mama Kirstein frowns. "Why would he be afraid of the princess?"

Julien shrugs. "I'm not sure. They met at a flower shop in Marley. I don't know what she said to him to make him feel that way." He takes a large bite of his turkey leg. "Whatever it was, it definitely humbled him."

Now that Jean could see.

"So," Julien looks up at the castle as he continues to tear apart the meat in his hand. "Since the princess becomes the Queen today, does that make you the King?"

Jean shakes his head. "It's not that simple."

"Isn't it?" Julien asks, his mouth full.

"He'd have to be married to her." His mother explains.

Julien smacks his brother on the arm. "Well! What are you waiting for?!"

Jean looks down at his arm. "First of all, don't hit me. Second, she hasn't even made a decision yet."

"A decision?" His mother questions. "You mean with who she wants to marry?"

"I'm pretty sure the other dude is out of the question by now." Julien states bluntly.

Jean rolls his eyes with frustration. "That isn't what I mean. Obviously, she had chosen me but that doesn't mean I'm going to force her to marry me. She finally has the freedom to choose her faith all on her own accord. I want her to pick what she wants to do with her future. Maybe being married isn't even in her itinerary."

His mother smiles and places a gentle hand on the same cheek she pinched earlier. "My sweet boy."

"Speaking of the princess," Jean begins to look around. The crowd had increased four times in size and the coronation was bound to start at any moment now. With that being said, he comes to the realization that he hasn't seen you all day long. "I think I should go find her."

Before they can say anything or offer to tag along, Jean leaves the two distant relatives to fend for themselves as he slips through the cracks and crevices of the crowd.

The journey to the castle was a difficult one. Everyone seemed to be running back and forth from place to place. After a few minutes, he successfully makes it inside.

It only made sense that you were in your room getting ready for the coronation so he heads straight there. Surprisingly, he found you alone.

"Hey." He pokes his head into the room. You were sat in front of your vanity and still in your pajamas. Your tiara was placed perfectly on your head awaiting for the moment where it gets traded in for a much larger crown.

"Hi." You say as you stare into the mirror with a vast expression. You don't even turn his way.

"You okay?" He asks as he shuts the door behind him.

You smile. "Yeah." When you meet his eyes, your smile drops and your eyes soften. "Actually, no I'm not."

He sits at the edge of your bed, a few feet away from you. "What's wrong?"

You turn around to face him in your seat. "I don't think I can do this."

"What do you mean?" He asks. "You have thousands of people waiting for you outside."

"I know, trust me, I know. It's just..." You trail off, your eyes going to the floor. "I just don't know if I can do this. Be a queen, I mean. Be responsible for the the livelihood of thousands of people. The same people who are outside cheering my name. They have no idea what they're getting into."

"Stop." He stands up from the bed. "Don't do that. You'll be an amazing queen. You know that, I know that, everyone knows that. That's why they're out there cheering for you."

You turn your back toward him again and face the mirror. "You know, everyone gives Kai shit for being irresponsible but I'm more irresponsible than he is. I drugged the entire castle staff and my family. I ran away and risked my own life just because I wanted some freedom. I risked your life and my friends' life when you guys came after me."

You turn your face slightly just to catch a glimpse of him. "That's what I do. I run away. Everytime things get hard, everytime I feel uncomfortable,
everytime I don't want to be in a certain situation, I run away."

He could tell you were getting cold feet. "What will I do if there's an emergency and I have to act fast?" You question. "Say I need to use the bathroom and run away?"

You scrunch your fingers in the air as you speak. "I can't hesitate. I can't run. I can't..." You look at your reflection once more. "I can't be selfish and I am. I'm disgustingly, bottom of the barrel, rotten to the core selfish."

People begin to chant your name over and over. They all synchronize their voices to amplify the sound loud enough to reach your bedroom window.

"I'm not fit to be a queen." You listen to harmonious sound of your name being repeated. "I don't own up to any of my mistakes. I haven't even told Phoenix or his parents that I'm not going through with the marriage or what you and I did. I'm avoiding them because that's what I do. I hide. I run."

He squats down in front of you so he's at your level, his hands resting on both of your draped knees. "The reason you haven't told them yet is because your parents last dying wish was for you to marry Phoenix and you choosing to do the opposite makes you feel like you're disappointing them. I'm sorry to tell you this but they're dead. You can't disappoint them."

You stare back at him with wide eyes full of surprise. You clearly didn't expect him to read you so bluntly. But if he knew you at all, he knew that a sharp tongue that spoke the bitter truth was the only way to get through to you.

"But these people..." He points to your balcony window. "What you can do is try not to disappoint the people out there. They're alive."

Your head bows, your face hidden as you look at your hands in your lap. He scoots closer. "If you realize it isn't for you, you can hand the crown back to Kai." He squeezes your knee. "But you have to atleast try before you give up."

You still don't meet his eye. He reaches for your anxious fingers and caresses them with his much calmer appendages. "You owe that to yourself. Ambrose died trying to give you the life you wanted. He died so that you could even have this choice to make. Don't let his death mean nothing."

You finally look up with your eyes but your sheltered posture stays firm. "You really think I can do this?"

He smiles with both his mouth and eyes. "I do. With no doubt in my mind."

He sees you begin to soften, your eyes twinkling with admiration. "Maybe I am overthinking it." You admit. "It's my dream after all. I should be happy this is happening."

"Are you not?" He asks.

You lift both your shoulders slightly. "I pictured it differently in my mind. I always thought my parents would be here. They were old and wrinkly and retired. My siblings were there too. Elijah relieved it wasn't him having to take the responsibility, Ambrose throwing a fit that they chose me instead and Malakai not caring whatsoever."

You then turn your attention to your nightgown. "Hitch would have made my coronation dress. She's not here either. I have nothing to wear that I haven't already. I have no one here to advise me on what I should do or say. I have no idea what the hell I'm supposed to be doing. No one prepped me for any of this."

As if it were divine timing, there's a knock behind the other end of the door. You announce for the person to come in and luscious strands of golden hair appear before the person even does.

Queen Historia closes the door behind her as she enters your room. She smiles as she holds a large rectangular box in your arms. "How are you feeling?"

"Lost. Confused. Scared." You begin to list adjectives that fit the criteria.

She sets the box down on the bed and chuckles. "Sounds familiar. I honestly thought I was going to shit myself when my coronation day came along. My parents were dead by then and I'm an only child so I went through it all alone as well."

Jean stands up as she approaches and bows his head. She smiles in appreciation and then gestures for him to get comfortable as he was before. "Looks like you're not too alone though."

Her crystal blue eyes wander over to your dress. "It's far too soon to have anything custom made for you, but—" She opens the lid to the box and unveils a dress that almost knocks you out of your chair. "This was your mother's coronation dress."

You and Jean had the exact same shocked expression. For the first time in your life, you come to face with the dress your mother wore when she became queen.

And it looked nothing like you thought it would.

"It's..." You struggle to find the words. "It's black."

The dress was a black as fabric could get. You don't think you ever even seen your mother wear such a color, much less wear it to the moment where she was introducing herself to the world.

She laughs at your reactions. "She got a lot of hate for wearing it but she didn't care. She was a force to be reckoned with back then. She wanted to do something bold."

"That's definitely bold." You stand up from the chair that you were glued to for hours. "Why black? Normally coronation dresses are gold or pink or white. Nice, bright colors."

She admires the dark dress with you. "I remember the day so vividly. She said she chose black because she was mourning her past life. She knew that once she became queen, she wasn't going to Scandalous Solana anymore. She was going to be a wife, a mother. A queen to a kingdom that didn't know her yet much less respected her."

Her eyes meet yours. "You're mourning too, you know? You don't have to be so strong all the time. You're hurting. I can see it. Not just for your past life but for the family you lost. The friends you lost."

A lump forms in Jean's throat when he hears her words. He too lost his friends and was also in mourning. Although Elijah and Ambrose weren't his blood, they were family to him too.

You take the dress from her and hold it up to yourself. "What if it doesn't fit?"

"I brought the best seamstresses I know to fix that." She smiles. "They were more than happy to see you again."

You quickly look at Jean, realizing that meant his family was in town. He nods signaling he was already fully aware.

You hug the dress tightly, the material grazing your skin. "Thank you. Truly."

She bows her head. "Of course." Her ears then pick up the sound of people chanting your name from down below. "It's scary, isn't it? Knowing all those people are depending on you to make their lives better."

"It's terrifying." You admit. "But I think I can handle it. I didn't get the proper training like my brother did but I studied him long enough to have some idea of what I'm supposed to do."

She comes closer, her hand reaching for yours. When they meet, she squeezes it tightly. "I learned the hard way that there really isn't a rule book to any of it. You just learn as you go. Even heads of kingdoms still make mistakes. That crown doesn't make you any less human than the rest."

Jean could see the relief wash over you. The invisible weight on your shoulders falls off and you stand a few inches taller.

"Whatever you need, I'll be here for you." Historia says. "Just like I was there for your mother. She had the exact same expression you have now. With time, it became easier for her. So easy that she made it look so simple to anyone else. That, however, took her years to get down. It didn't happen overnight. She struggled a lot."

Historia's eyes then move toward Jean. "She had your father to guide her. Not that you need a man to advise you on what to do. It's just nice to have someone to crawl into bed with after long day."

Jean tried to picture Queen Solana in a dress like this. Since he was a child, the woman was always well put together. There wasn't a single strand out of place on her head and she was always dressed appropriately. She was polite and gracious while also being stern and straightforward when she needed to be.

It was hard to imagine her in the way Historia described her. Wild at heart and hard to tame. He couldn't picture her wearing a dress as symbolic as this one.

The dress was pitch black with hints of sparkle here at there. There was even a thin veil that went down the back and transitioned into a hood.  There was even a thin slit going down from the center of the chest. It was beautiful in a dark, haunting way.

It seemed like you couldn't wrap it around your head either. Your eyes were like magnets to the dress. You couldn't seem to tear them away. Now that he really thought about it, he had never seen you in such a color either.

But it was true. You were mourning. Not just the family and friends you lost but your past life as well. You were never going to be the same ever again. He knew that. You knew that.

Solana herself went from a young, mischievous girl to a proper, mature queen over time. No one thought she had the ability to rule a kingdom because of her past and she proved them all wrong. She was one of the greatest queens Eldia had ever had.

He tried to picture you in that position. His entire life he'd known you to be adventurous and youthful. He tried to see you years from now as responsible as your mother was. He tried to picture you chasing after your children and warning them to behave. It almost made him laugh just to think about it.

It was strange to think about. You being a mother. You had never really talked about having kids except for that one night where you mentioned you had always wanted to name your daughter after your favorite galaxy. Andromeda.

"What are you smiling about?" You call out to him.

He snaps out of his daydream. "I was picturing our children."

Your eyes jolt open and Historia's face turned two shades brighter as she blushes. She wipes her hands on her dress and fights the urge to laugh. "I'll leave you two alone. I'll see you out there, okay? Good luck and don't be nervous."

She leaves the room, leaving the two of you alone again. You stand in front of your full length mirror and hold the dress up to your body. "I still can't believe she wore something like this for her first public appearance. I used to think I knew my mother like the back of my hand. Ever since I've met Historia, she's proven that wrong."

He stands behind you in the mirror. "One day it'll be your daughter who will listen to stories of your youth in disbelief."

You scrunch your eyebrows together and turn your neck to look at him. "What are you on about?"

"Nothing." He chuckles. He then begins to pull the dress you currently wore off your shoulders. "Let me help you get undressed."

"Fine." You let out a deep breath. "Just don't get me pregnant in the process." You tease.

He laughs and places small kisses on your bare shoulders. "No promises." He jokes in return.

He helps you put on the dress once your nightgown slips off. It almost fit you perfectly except for a few places which Sylvie quickly fixed just as Historia said she would.

Once Slyvie's glam team arrived, Jean realized his part was done. "I'll see you out there." He says before he attempts to leave the room.

"Wait!" You jump for his hand. He looks down at your connected fingers and then back at you. Your eyes were filled with a subtle glass curtain. "I'm scared."

"I'll be watching you from the crowd." He replies as he holds onto your hand more firmly. "If you ever get nervous, just look for me."

You nod slowly and then release his hand. "Okay."

He leans forward and kisses you on the lips one last time. "You're going to make an amazing queen."

                                         ✧

Jean stood in the center of the crowd. He had the perfect view of the balcony which you'd get crowned on. To his left stood Mikasa. On his right, his mother and his half brother stood, along with his family.

"I can't believe this is actually happening." Mikasa is the first to speak. "Y/n becoming queen. Who would've thought?"

Eren was off with the rest of the royal guard. They all stood in front of the castle as they guarded the entrance and attempted to control the bustling crowd. Jean would normally be up there too if he hadn't be fired.

"I'm so excited for her!" Mama Kirstein chimes, unable to contain her excitement. "I was around for her mother's coronation and now I get to see hers." Her excitement then fades. "I'm getting old." She realizes.

Jean snickers and throws his arm around her. Up above on the balcony stood Commander Erwin and Lieutenant Levi. The second Kai comes into shot, the crowd begins to grow louder as they cheer. Jean could see his bashful smile from all the way down here.

Julien grabs his daughter and tosses her up on her shoulders to get a better view. When she sees Kai, she frowns. "Is that the princess's older brother?"

"Yes, it is." Her father answers. "That's Prince Malakai."

"If he's older, shouldn't he be king?" She wonders.

"He chose to pass the crown to his sister. He felt she was better fit." He answers patiently.

She still seemed confused. "So if she's going to be queen... who will be king?"

Jean could feel every pair of eyes that overheard the conversation turn to him. His mother included.

"Ohhhhh." She giggles. Julien puts a finger to his lips as he mischievously shushes her.

Jean's heart was racing for you. There was hundreds of thousands of people from all over the world standing here waiting for you to come out those doors.

Everywhere he looked, people from every corner caught his eye. They all looked so different from the next. You were truly bringing kingdoms together.

[play queen by perfume genius here or don't and die idc]

The doors come open and before you even step a single foot out, the crowd begins to go wild. They scream and cheer for you so loudly that Jean fights the urge to cover his ears.

You step forward, Historia beside you before she moves aside next to Kai. You place both hands on the railing as you look down at the ocean of people.

When the crowd notices the color of your dress, their cheers turn into gasps and confused whispers. Some recognized the symbolism immediately and cry for your loss. Some judge you without even considering the story behind it.

Jean can see you begin to grow nervous, your chest rising and falling quickly as you scan the crowd for him. When your eyes meet, you sigh with relief and smile at him. He sends you a warm smile right back.

His mother lets out a shaky breath when she sees you in the same dress she saw your mother in. The striking resemblance almost knocked her off her feet. "Wow. It's like I've travelled back in time."

Commander Smith raises his hands, commanding the crowd to grow silent. Their whispers slowly disappear and all their eyes stay glued onto you, even as he speaks.

"I would like to thank everyone for being here today on such a special day." He begins. "We are here today to celebrate the coronation of the princess of Eldia."

The archbishop steps forward and bows in front of you. He begins to say the standard words from the book that he seems to have memorized from the multiple times he's done this.

He asks you in front of half the world if you vow to do your duties as queen to protect and honor your country with all your power. You agree willingly.

Finally, after all the necessary words have been spoken, he places the queen's crown on your head as you bow your head in order for him to do so.

He then faces the crowd and says, "Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you Queen Yn of Eldia. Long live the queen!"

The royal guard all stomp their feet and their staffs at the same time, the ground beneath them shaking with the force. "LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!"

The crowd repeats the words right after. "LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!" Jean couldn't contain his smile as he joins in along with his family and Mikasa. "LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!"

The crowd goes insane once again as they all jump up with joy and embrace their neighbors. They throw roses and other flowers up as high as they can as you attempt to catch them.

Historia brings her arms around you as she hugs you tightly. Levi and Erwin both bow graciously before you.

"She did it." Mikasa cries. "She actually fucking did it. She's queen."

"Hell yeah, she did." Jean grins. He throws his arms in the air and he whoops along with the rest of the crowd. Julien jumps up and down with his daughter still on his shoulders as she bounces.

Hundreds of balloons get released into the air and confetti flies through the wind and covers the sky and floor. People danced in circles as they celebrated something they never saw coming.

You step forward once again, your hand raised for everyone to quiet down. They all break apart from their huddled groups to bring their attention back to you.

When they grow silent, you take a deep breath before you address them for the first time as queen. "Hello everyone, I thank each and every one of you for being here. It means the world to me."

You make eye contact with Jean again to calm your nerves before you continue. "I know I was not the first choice for this position or even the second. I know that most of you think I'll never amount to how effortlessly my parents ruled."

You shrug. "And most of you would be right." There's the sound of laughter arising from the crowd as you use the joke to lighten the mood.

"The truth is, no one really expected me to ever be in this position." You speak. "Myself included. Because of that, I never bothered to learn the rules and responsibilities of this position. I always depended on my parents being around or my older brothers."

The subtle mention of the deceased makes the crowd lower their heads with respect as they mourn the loss of the previous king and queen.

"Since they've passed, I have lived, I have lost. I have failed and I have conquered." You continue. "I have grown into a person I know is capable of doing amazing things that are needed not just here in Eldia but all around the world."

The people of Eldia look at eachother with slight confusion meanwhile the people from out of state all raise their heads with sudden attentiveness.

"That's right." You notice their peak in interest. "I don't want to just make Eldia a better place. I want to help everyone. In order to do that, I need all of your help. I want Eldia to be a safe haven to those who need it. I want other kingdoms to unite with Eldia to become stronger."

Mama Kirstein smiles as she shakes her head. "I knew one day she'd break down borders. I just never knew how."

"Eldia has always had close bonds with strong kingdoms like Marley and Paradis." You say as you gesture to Historia. "But what about places like Ember? The poorer countries who actually need help. The ones who can't defend themselves. The ones who suffer while the rest of us live freely."

More confused whispers.

You hold up your hand as if to swear to the world. "I devote my reign to colliding our worlds together. I will help those who need it, not just the ones who can help us in return. I will heal the wounds of our past to bring a more prosperous future."

Jean already knew what was coming. Your hand then comes down. "I was born with the power to heal. I was raised to keep it hidden out of fear. But I refuse to hide. I refuse to let fear stop me from doing what needs to be done. I will heal everyone in the world until my last dying breath."

You then smile. "And if anyone has any issue with that, they can personally come see me."

"She..." Mikasa stutters. "She just told the world she has..."

"Yup." Jean smirks.

The crowd takes a moment to process the information. The ones who were unaware ask for clarification from the ones who had already been healed by you before. Suddenly, everything made sense. Once the truth comes to light, they all cheer for you once again.

"Long live the queen!" A man shouts.

"LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!" They all shout in return.

Mama Kirstein crashes into her son, bawling with happiness as she does. "She doesn't have to hide anymore. She's free. She's finally free."

He caresses the back of her head as he fights the urge to cry himself. "Finally."

Mikasa places a hand on her forehead as she stares at the waves the crowd form in shock. She laughs in disbelief. "Am I dreaming? After all these years, she's really free?"

Eren, still fully in uniform, breaks apart from his regiment and runs straight to her. He grabs her and spins her around as he yells. "LETS GOOO!"

He then hugs Jean once he sets Mikasa back down on her feet. "THATS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT!" He then pulls away and gives Jean the look. "Better put a ring on that finger before someone else does again for the third time."

Jean pushes his head away and grins widely at the crowd that spins wildly with joy. Most people stood there stuck, processing what this all meant. Others run around unable to contain their excitement. The queen, after all, admitted to having the ability to heal all their issues with just a touch of their hand.

He, himself, seemed to be stuck in a dream. Everything felt so dark and endless for a while. After all the pain, all the lives lost, it felt like Eldia was never going to come back from that.

But here it was, standing almost fully upright after the bombing. The new hub for people around the world who needed shelter, who needed help. Eldia was now a safe haven.

War was finally over.

He spins around to see you once again. You stand up on the balcony still, smiling brightly at all you've accomplished and all you've overcome in the last few months. It seemed you too were having a hard time believing that it was all finally over.

While the crowd is distracted, you turn around and go past the doors and into the castle. He doesn't hesitate to dart through the horde of people to make it back inside. Since they were all too busy celebrating, he had an easy straight shot.

The inside of the castle was relatively empty. The bottom of his shoes echoed throughout the entrance as he raced up the stairs to the floor you were on.

When he makes it up there, he sees you stepping out. He stares at you in awe and out of breath. You send a coy smile in his direction.

"That wasn't so bad now, was it, your highness?" He teases as he holds his hand out. Your fingers graze his palm as you help him up the stairs.

"Oh, shut it." You warn him.

He smiles a big cheesy smile. "So, what's your first action of order as queen of Eldia?"

You lean up against the rail. "Well, getting you hired back into the royal guard for starters. That is, if that's what you want?"

When you ask the question, your eyes narrow and peer into his carefully. It was like you were testing him somehow but he had no clue on what. Were you expecting a certain kind of answer?

To stay in safe territory, he answers the question with another question. "Is there any other option?"

You see right through him. "I'm asking you what you want, Kirstein. Do you want to return to the royal guard or not?"

He bites his tongue for a second, cautious not to spill too much with all the wandering bodies lingering around as they begin to enter back inside the castle. "If I return to the guard, you and I...."

You nod. "That's right."

He knew what he'd be sacrificing if he did choose to go back. It was absolutely forbidden for anyone in the royal guard to have romantic relations with anyone in the royal family, especially the heads of the kingdom.

Even though you could change that law with a snap of your fingers, it was cause more damage than good. There would be an uproar. It's probably better if you didn't upset the whole world on your first day as queen.

He leads you down the hall, just a few feet away from the staircase and away from anyone listening.

"I want to be beside you." He answers. "I want to be yours. If you'll have me, that is. I understand that I can't work in the castle if that's the case. I'll get a job outside the castle. Maybe work at that bakery I love so much."

You raise your eyebrows. "You'd work at a bakery for me?"

He shrugs. "I get to eat my favorite food all day long. Not much of a sacrifice if you ask me."

You giggle. "You'd get fat."

His hands come up to your hips as he squeezes the sides of your waist. "Are you saying you wouldn't love me with a few extra pounds?"

You begin to laugh wildly as his fingers tickle you. The sound of your laughter echos through the vacant halls like they used to. Tears form in your eyes as you beg him to stop.

When you come down from your high, you place both hands on the sides of his face. "I could never stop loving you."

He pulls you in closer. "So then let me make this sacrifice for you. I'll let go of my dream of running the guard if it means you and I can be together. I'll happily do it."

"Actually..." Your hands come down. "I may have another alternative. One that is much better than being head of the royal guard."

The sound of someone coming up the stairs distracts him for moment. The two of you both crane your necks to see who it might be and when the person sees the two of you, he sighs and attempts to walk in the other direction.

"Phoenix!" You shout. You look at Jean one more time. "I'm sorry, I have to talk to him. He's been avoiding me ever since we left Ember."

He nods. "Do what you have to do."

You plant a kiss on his cheek while Phoenix's back is still turned. "I'll find you later." Then, you dart past him in the other direction.

"Hey!" You grab the ends of your dress as you rush over to him. Phoenix senses you behind him and begins to pick up the pace.

You were much faster than he was. You had your brothers to thank for that. When you make it beside him, you spin him around to face you. "No. No more running. You will stand. You will speak to me."

He scoffs, laughing at your sudden surge of superiority. "Okay." He adjusts his footing. "What is that you want, your highness?"

He says the words your highness in the same teasing tone Jean did, confirming he overheard the conversation. As much as his sneaky jabs irritated you, you allow it to pass. "I want to apologize."

His face was as cold as ever. "You're forgiven. May I go now?"

"No." You stand your ground. The sensation of authority was foreign coming from your mouth. You weren't sure if it suited you but it gave you a slight rush. "You will stand here and you will listen."

He stares at you in silence. He normally had an expressive face. Large, kind eyes and a permanent smile usually glued to his lips. But right now, it was extremely hard to read him.

You wanted to run. You wanted to avoid the conversation completely. Anxiety began to eat at each and every nerve inside your skin. Your feet twitched against the marble floors as they fought the urge to dart in the other direction.

But instead, you stay. After today, you were no longer a princess who had the privilege of running and hiding because your parents or older brother would do the job for you. They weren't around anymore.

This was all on you.

If you couldn't face Phoenix, how could you face your entire country? Much less the world.

You shut your eyes and take a deep breath. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not being completely honest to you. I know you know about Jean and I hate that you had to find out from someone else other than myself."

Run, run, run!

"I want you to know that it isn't a fling or something that just started recently." You begin to plead your case. "I've loved him for quite a while."

You chuckle to yourself at your humble understatement. "More than a while, actually. He was my first love. Even before I knew what love was, I knew that I loved him."

You could feel heat rise to your cheeks as you spill your soul out to someone who was as still as a statue. "I tried to put my feelings aside for you. More like for my parents because that's what they wanted. No one really ever bothered to ask me what was it that I wanted."

You finally meet his eyes, your heart immediately suffering the consequences when you do. The emotion had returned to his irises and you could see the hints of betrayal and hurt in them.

"I was a terrible fiancé to you." You admit. "For that I am truly sorry. All you've ever been was kind to me from the very first second we met."

The ache in your chest only seems to punish you even more for your infidelity. "I wanted to love you. I wanted to be the wife you wanted. The one that you deserve."

"But you..." You grab onto the railing for support. "You're pure. Genuinely pure. I used to think you and I were the exact same but we're not."

You point at your heart. "I'm a good person because of this. I have a magical flower inside me that forces me to be kind or else I'll get punished for it. Without this, I'm not as good of a person as everyone thinks I am."

"But you?" You continue as your hand comes down. "You are good and pure and kind without the help of anything. That's how you naturally are. I know that because you would've never been unfaithful to me the way I was to you."

You close your eyes again. "I really, really, really wanted to love you. In fact, I do. It's so incredibly hard not to love you. It's just not that kind of love."

You step closer, daring to break the tensive space between both of you. "I care about you, Phoenix. That's why hugged you before I hugged anyone else when you all came after me. That's why I tried to save your feelings for this long. That's why I'm swallowing my pride and forcing myself to have the courage to tell you the truth because you deserve it."

"You deserve better than me." You say aloud. "I'm selfish. I run. I avoid. But I'm not doing that anymore. I'm not going to hide. I will own up to my actions. I will face the consequences. I take responsibility for it all."

He still says nothing. His posture and demeanor are a constant void of nothingness. He watches you as you speak but doesn't move a muscle. He was giving you the bare minimum of hearing you out.

Regardless of how humiliating his silence was, you still push forward. "I don't want to lose you as a friend. I know you'll hate me after this if you don't already but I hope that one day, you and I can be friends again."

You pinch your palm. "I care about you too much to never speak to you again. I don't care if it takes ten years. I'll wait. I want to be friends. Not in another life but this one. I'll wait."

Now you felt like you were just babbling on. The conversation was abundantly one sided but it was like the words kept flowing out. "I'll endure whatever punishment you throw my way. You want to ignore me? Fine. You want to call me an adulterous whore? Fine. I deserve that. Do whatever it takes for you to forgive me and be friends with me again. I don't want to be strangers."

Finally, you breathe out the last of it. "I'm sorry for everything. From the bottom of my heart."

He's quiet for a few seconds more as he waits for your speech to come to an end. "Are you done?"

"Yes."

"Okay." And just like that, he walks away from you. He gave you the kindness of listening to you and that's all you were going to receive. Just like that, the conversation was over. You weren't sure if it ever really begun.

You stand alone now in the empty hallway. You silently curse yourself for embarrassing yourself in such a degrading way. Was it worth it at all? Were the two of you never to speak again?

"Well..." You hear a voice behind you say. You turn not even fully and see Kai standing there with his arms crossed. "That was painful to watch."

You glare at him. "Were you there the entire time?"

"Yup." He answers. "Phoenix saw me too but I don't think you're on his good side enough for him to warn you."

You sigh and walk toward him. "Atleast I got it over with. Think he'll forgive me?"

He shrugs. "Maybe. I'm sure he'll get over it eventually."

"What if he doesn't?" You console in your brother's words of advice.

"Then it's his loss." He answers swiftly. "The earth will continue to spin regardless. You have bigger things to worry about now."

You adjust the crown on your head, the unfamiliar weight beginning to become noticeable. "I suppose you're right."

He points at the crown. "That suits you."

You tilt your head, the crown slowly moving with it. "Don't lie to me. It hasn't been fitted to my measurements yet so it's still big. I feel like a kid who stole their mother's shoes."

The gentle mention of your mother seems to strike a chord in his heart. "I'm sure you've heard this plenty of times already today but... I can't get over how much you look like her right now."

Your shoulders fall. It's true that you had heard the compliment time after time today but the words coming from your brother's mouth just hit you differently. Probably because he was the only one who knew how painful it was that she was no longer here.

"This is her dress." You hold up the tulle surrounding you. "Can you believe she wore something like this for her coronation?"

He smiles somberly. "Maybe that's where I got my love for the color black from. I always wondered."

"I miss her." You reply.

"Me too." He exhales. "I keep staring at their statues out there thinking they'll just come to life and it was all some prank Ambrose came up with to mess with us."

You chuckle softly. "Sounds like something he'd do."

"I miss him too." Kai admits. "I never thought I would."

The two of you stand in silence, arms dangling over the railing of the second floor as you look down below. The castle staff was running amuck as they prepared everything for tonight's festivities.

"Would it be terrible if I cancelled the party?" You wonder. "I mean, it is my party after all."

He laughs as he places a hand on your shoulder. "The party may be in honor of you but it isn't for you. It's for them." He gestures to the people down below. "It's an excuse for all of them to get shitfaced in light of all the depressing shit going on."

You blow air out your cheeks and rest your elbow on the rail to hold up your heavy head. "I suppose cancelling it would be cruel then. I'm just... not up for a party right now. Those never really were my thing. It was more of mom's. She loved planning the party and Ambrose loved being the life of them. Without either of them here, it just feels pointless."

"I'd say something corny like they're here in spirit," Kai says. "But that sends chills down my spine thinking about it."

You laugh. "What, why?"

He turns to you. "They were both obnoxious when they were alive. Can you imagine them as invisible, hovering ghosts following us around everywhere? Atleast when they were alive, we could dodge them."

You laugh even louder. "I never would've imagined you were the type of man to be terrified of ghosts."

He snaps his head toward you and stands up straight. "I never have been until now. How am I supposed to do anything without feeling like the two most judgemental people I know are now watching over me?"

You continue to laugh as you picture them hovering over you. The far distant sounds of them telling you you're doing something incorrectly or a certain color doesn't suit you well.

"You know.." You sigh. "I haven't gone to visit their graves yet. I don't even know where they're buried. I've been avoiding it."

"I've only gone once." Kai admits. "The day they got buried. They're in the royal cemetery down by the grove. People have been bringing them flowers everyday."

You look at your brother with sad eyes. "Prince Nicholas of Ember is here. King Nicholas now actually. He brought Ambrose's body in a casket. They tried to save as much of him as possible but..."

Kai looks away from you, unable to bear your face. You and Ambrose always looked the most alike so it probably pained him to look at you each time. "Oh."

"I don't know what I'm supposed to do." You say as you mess with the gifted bracelet around your wrist. "Nobody knows he was the second traitor. Am I supposed to keep that way? Should I save what little dignity and respect he has left? Or do I tell them all the truth since it'll probably come to light anyway?"

He shakes his head toward the ground. "Part of me wants to tell the truth because if we don't, and the truth comes out, it'll make us look bad."

"And the other part of you?" You wonder.

He looks at you finally and for the first time in a while, you see your brother cry. "The other part of me wants to protect him. I want to lie to save his face. I want to shield him from all the negativity that will come when people know the truth."

He laughs as he angrily wipes his tears. "Isn't that stupid? He betrayed us and yet we still want to save him."

"We do stupid things for love." You respond. "He's our brother no matter what. That doesn't change."

He inhales air in attempt to stop himself from crying more. "He's a fucking idiot, that's what he is."

"That too." You reply. "That doesn't change either."

He blows out the air and lowers his head as tears forcefully come out. You pull him into your arms and hug him as he cries it all out. It was rare for him to ever show this kind of emotion so you knew it was as difficult for him to process as it was for you.

When he's done, you release him and he clears his throat and wipes his face. You stand beside him and don't say a word, giving him a few moments to collect himself. "Don't tell anyone about this." He says.

"I don't think they'd believe me even if I did." You tease. He smiles slightly as you bump his shoulder with yours.

"Here's what I think we should do." You say. "We have a private funeral, not a public one like mom, dad and Elijah. Just us and a few others who really knew Ambrose. Then if anyone asks what happened, we tell them the truth. If they don't ask, we don't say anything at all."

He nods as he sniffles. "That works."

"Good." You stand up straight. "Now for the hard part."

                                         ✧

Jean, Kai, Phoenix and Eren carry the heavy casket on their shoulders through the grove and toward the cemetery.

You walked along side Jean's mother who held you tightly. Mikasa and Armin walked behind the two of you.

It was a small group for the funeral, probably the complete opposite of what Ambrose would've actually wanted but it was for the better.

Knowing him, he would've wanted some extravagant, over-the-top party. Technically, everyone was still celebrating down at the plaza so there sorta was a party going on. Not to mention your coronation party was in a couple hours so there was that as well.

The boys set the casket down on a spot beside the graves for your parents. As they begin to dig six feet below, you squat down beside your parents' and Elijah's grave and say your goodbyes to them since you couldn't until now.

Kai was right, there really was an abundance of flowers beside their tombs. The vivid colors of all the various petals managed to make the scene look slightly less gloomy.

Beside flowers, there also laid cards and letters written with respect. Candles also burned brightly as the sun began to set. "They really were loved, weren't they?" You say.

Mama Kirstein takes a seat beside you, a hand resting on your shoulder. "They would be so proud of you."

You smile toward her and thank her for her kind words. In your arms, you held four bouquets of flowers that were thrown up to you during your coronation. You set one bouquet on each of their tombs, keeping one bouquet of vibrant red roses in your arms.

She kisses the top of your head before she leaves alone to pay your respects. You shut your eyes and allow the wind to speak for you as it flows past you and shakes the trees around.

"I'm sorry I couldn't save you." You say. "But I promise I'll try to save the legacy you left behind." You bring your fingers to your lips and place them on their tombstones.

As you stand back up on your feet, the small group looks back at you silently waiting for you to finish so they can move on with the next.

The casket remained closed and the hole was as deep as the four boys could make it. You meet Kai's eyes who were silently calling out for help.

You stand beside him and hold onto his hand. Even though he was older than you, it felt the opposite right now. He looked like a younger brother finding shelter in the arms of his older sister.

"Open the casket." You order. They all look at eachother with doubt. "It's fine. Just open it."

Eren curls his fingers around the edge of the opening and pulls it apart, his face to the side to avoid looking at the body. Everyone else beside you and Kai respectfully look away.

A sharp breath leaves you and your brother at the same time when you see him. He looked like Ambrose but several shades lighter. He always had a tan glow to his skin from always being outside but right now he looked as pale as ever.

His body was put back together in the best way the morticians could possibly do with what was left. The bottom half of him was covered, probably because the bones in his legs were beyond repair.

His face and neck had several scars that they covered up with makeup but were still faintly obvious.

"Someone so obsessed with their looks died so hideously." You say. "It's almost poetic."

"Goes to show no matter how beautiful you are, you end up exactly like everyone else in the end." Kai adds. "In a grave to be swallowed by the earth."

You set the final bouquet of roses down on his chest. "The rich and the poor all go to the same place."

Kai looks over at Elijah's grave. "The ugly and the beautiful will both look death in the face." He finishes. "I remember Eli saying that."

You look at Ambrose one last time, your hand touching his cold, lifeless face. "If only he had remembered that."

You and Kai both shut the casket closed and the boys help lower it down into the ground before they begin to throw dirt over it.

"I'll have someone make a tombstone." Phoenix says to the two of you, temporarily putting his anger aside.

"Thank you." You says, slightly surprised he was even acknowledging your existence. You watch him as he walks away with his head down. You had completely forgotten that the only reason you and Phoenix had ever even met was because of Ambrose. The two had been friends for years prior to you two meeting. It must've hurt him to bury him just as much.

Kai shudders. "They're here." He begins to scratch the back of his neck where the hairs stood up. "I can feel it."

You laugh, tears swelling up. You look around as if you'd see some floating, opalescent figures beside you. You understood what he meant, their presence was definitely here and it was hard to ignore.

Eren shoots up. "Oh hell no, I don't do ghosts." He darts out the cemetery and Armin slowly begins to step backwards. "Yeah, I think I'll go help Phoenix find someone to make the tomb." He then rushes out the cemetery too.

Mama Kirstein hugs the two of you before she departs as well. "We will give you two some space." She forcefully drags Jean out with her.

For a moment you think it's just you and Kai but you catch Mikasa lingering off to the side. As the sun began to lower ever more, the sky turned darker making Kai grow even more eerie. "Yeah, I can't do this. I'll see you at the party." He takes off sprinting out the gates.

You stand there in the faint darkness, staring at the tombs of your family members. Mikasa quietly makes her way over to stand beside you. "Hi."

"Hi." You respond.

"Congrats on..." She points to the crown on your head.

Your fingers come up to touch the cold, pointed tips of the crown. You had already completely forgot about your new promotion. "Oh, thank you."

The tension was awkward to say the least. It was clear the both of you had something to say but didn't know how to start.

"So," You both say at the exact same time. You both chuckle tensely. She gestures for you to go first.

"Marley, huh?" Is all that manages to come out your mouth.

She nods, her fingers knitting together anxiously in front of her. "We leave in a few moments."

You step in front of her. "Wait, you're not staying for the party?" You thought you had some more time to reconcile things with her before she left.

"We can't." She explains. "We need to be there by the morning. They held the job open for Eren as long as they could. If he pushes it back another day, they'll give it someone else."

"I see." You bite the inside of your lip. "I'm sorry you can't make it."

"I'm sure you won't even notice we're missing. There's thousands of people out there." She replies.

You shake your head. "A thousand people can't replace my bestfriend."

You can see the effect the word had on her. Her facial experience melted into something grim. You could see her heart breaking. Even after all the cruel things you said to her, she still found it difficult to leave you behind.

It was hurting you too. You were just much better at hiding it. "I'm sorry to see you go. I feel like we've been side by side for so long. I'm not sure how I'll do this without you."

She smiles faintly. "I'm sure we'll come often to visit. Eren's family still lives here." She then points to him and Jean. Jean was teasing Eren by making scary noises and chasing him while Eren screams and swings in his direction. "Besides, you know those two can't stay away from eachother that long anyway."

You laugh as you watch them. "I forget he's losing one of his bestfriends too." You then look back at her. "I'm really going to miss you, Mikasa."

A gleam shines past her gray eyes. "You know, for years I was so worried to move on from this job because I didn't want to leave you alone. You were so naive and gullible that I wanted to be there always to protect you."

"And now?" You wonder. "Am I no longer naive?"

Her jet black hair moves along with her. "Sometimes." She chuckles. "But atleast now I know someone else is there watching over you. I never thought I'd say this but I trust Jean completely with your life."

You can see the tears threatening to spill out her eyes but she forces them in place. "I can move on with my life peacefully knowing you are in good hands. You don't need me anymore."

Her eyes shift upwards to your crown. "You've made it. You've come a long way. You aren't that ridiculously impulsive girl anymore. You've changed. I see it when I look at you."

"If I still were impulsive," You speak. "Would that be enough for you to stay?"

Her lips twist inward as she finds the right words. "There's nothing you can do anymore to make me stay. I want to have my own life. I want the husband and the kids with the house and maybe some filthy dog. Wherever Eren decides to go, I'll go. If one day he decides to come back, I'll follow him. Until then..."

"I need to let you go." You finish the sentence for her.

The dam finally breaks and a tear rolls down her porcelain skin. "You need to let me go."

You look at her one last time and come to terms that this was really goodbye. "Okay."

"Okay." She wipes her face clean.

You bow your head. "Goodbye, Mikasa."

"Goodbye, your majesty." She begins to turn on her heel in the other direction, breath shaky as she does.

She managed to walk a few feet before you rush over to her and hug her tightly for the last time. "Thank you for putting up with me all these years."

She squeezes you in return. "I'd do it in every lifetime. I don't regret it a single bit."

The two of you pull away and you clear your throat as you wipe your eyes dry. "Well, go on then. You'll be late."

"Right." She sniffles. "Until next time."

"And the time after that." You smile. "Have a safe trip and don't forget about me."

"I couldn't even if I wanted to." She replies as she walks backwards. She then makes it back over to where Eren and Jean stand, bringing their playing to an end.

The two boys stare at each other as they try to catch their breath from wrestling. "Well," Jean says. "This is it."

"Don't miss me too much." Eren answers.

"That'll be easy." Jean scoffs.

Eren laughs. "I'll see you around, horse face. Don't get into too much trouble while I'm gone."

"No promises." Jean responds.

The two boys stare at eachother in silence before Jean grabs him by the shoulder and pulls him in for hug. "Take care of Mikasa. Yn will never forgive you if you don't."

"Take care of yn." Eren says. "Mikasa will never forgive you if you don't."

The two chuckle before they let eachother go. Eren waves at you from a distance and you wave in return. He then takes Mikasa's hand and leads her out the cemetery and they go on their way.

Jean now stands alone at the gates and you alone by the graves. He holds out his hand and smiles in your direction, "Ready?"

You take a deep breath, allowing all your doubt, worry and sorrow to flow out of you as you do. You feel the sensation of four people standing behind you, their hands on your shoulders helping the toxic energy leave your body. "Ready."