I hadn't heard from her. I hadn't heard from her for couple of months now. And I'd never felt so empty. My life, my heart, were sore because of the emptiness that had invaded my life.

It was surprising me, the effect it had on me, on my own sanity, that she was in my life or not. Too bad I realized I needed her with me, too late.

People would say I was surrounding by amount of people. So I couldn't suffer from loneliness. But having the closest ones towards you is the most important in life, they are the people you love, you value and need the most. When one of them is missing, it's your whole life that suffers. And I had only a few, my family and true friends. I could count them on my hand fingers.

It was killing me inside, not seeing her. Not seeing her beautiful chestnut doe eyes, and perfect cute little smile. I was missing everything of her. The way she put her hair behind her shoulder when it's bugging her. I was even missing the sound of her angelic voice and cutest laugh.

But for her sake, I had to disappear from her life, at least for a while. The damage that I'd done were important, and it was my duty to let her heal, to let her move on, and live her life. It was quite double or nothing, but it was worse it. And it wasn't like I had another option. I had to prey, that eventually, she would come back to me, as she belongs to me.

For once, I wasn't selfish. I put her needs first, and mine behind, on hold. It hadn't been easy. It was not something I was used to. All these years I'd been touring, and being a rock star, everyone was putting my needs first, I had all I asked and wanted. And I forgot what it was like, to not have everything you want, in a click of the fingers. This would take time. But I was willing to wait. It was worse the wait.

Of course, deep down, I was hoping that she could forgive me. That we could talk, and fix this. And that it wouldn't take too long. That it would be easier.

How stupid was I?

For years, I kept avoiding what I felt, what I truly felt about her. Maybe I wasn't sure. I wasn't mature enough to recognize that I loved her. I was a typical guy of my age, and didn't want to put any effort in a relationship, being exclusive and all.

My life was so easy, and it changed so fast. Since X- Factor everything had changed. I was just a kid when I left home, I lost all my bearings. I did my best not to change. But I changed, how couldn't I ?

For years, I was busy working, travelling all over the world, performing on stage in amazing venues and stadiums. It had been incredible, and quite surreal. So many times my mother told me that she was so proud, that it never stopped, and she felt that sometimes her heart could burst because of everything I had achieved, and accomplished. I was so proud, to be able to take care of my family, to let them safe, financially.

My life had changed. And I changed.

I didn't change bad though. Thankfully, my mother taught me to be kind and respect people.

I was proud, being able to take care of my family, my mother and sister could do whatever with their lives and not worry about money anymore. And I was known for treating people correctly, with manners. So how did I end up hurting Emma so bad?

Everywhere I went, there was a bunch of fans waiting for me. Imagine your life, when you just go out with friends, and people started crying, yelling your name, taking pictures of you.

I loved it. I loved every second of what I lived, and could never express how grateful I was. But when it came to love, or serious relationship, it didn't help.

I was a typical twenty-year-old guy, who wasn't ready to settle in and be in a too serious relationship, and the craziness of my life didn't help, at all.

People said I was kind, sweet and nice. Everywhere I went, I thanked everyone for their job, shaking hands, for what they were doing for us. Taking pictures, and paid attention to the fans, who were waiting for hours for me. I had always been nice to everyone.

Except to one person.

I had to confess, that at a point, I thought she wasn't enough for me. For a while, I was looking for hanging out with only famous girls. The team told me it was good for my image, and business. So, I listened to them and dated Taylor, and Kendall. That's when I lost myself. Those relationships led me nowhere, and they weren't even food for my image, and business... Those girls were shallow and just wanted to be seen with me. I was bored with them.

I thought she wasn't enough sometimes. But I always came back to her. Every single time I saw her, I needed the closeness, I needed to smell the scent of her hair, see her incredibly cute smile. My heart pounded in my chest every time she walked the room.

But I kept pushing the feelings aside.

People must think that it was easy for us, for me, to date girls, because they were just throwing themselves at our feet. But actually, it was all the contrary. It was damn hard; to find someone you could trust. No matter if you wanted a serious relationship or not. If you just wanted to have fun, you couldn't just sleep with someone, or the girls would brag on social media that she slept with you, and you felt violated, and annoyed. It was truly annoying. Not being truly appreciated for who I was, as a human being, but because the person they thought I was. If that makes sense.

Every girl was trying to be with us, in different way, on purpose, with kind of an agenda.

Emma wasn't like that. She had always seen the real person I was, behind the façade.

Anyway.

Thankfully, I got the guys who told me she was getting better.

Her life was easier, and better, without me.

Without me.

That realization hurt me, deeply.

Believe me, it wasn't easy, to stay away, for that long.

She was fine, and happy. Without me.

On the contrary, I was a mess. Without her.

She had broken up with Ryan. Louis told me she wasn't ready to commit herself in a relationship.

I was relieved to hear the news, because that Ryan was a total douche. I couldn't believe that the guy blackmailed me to publish compromising pictures of Emma in the media, if I didn't pay him. It kept bugging me while in Ibiza, and I finally managed and dealt with all of this. Thankfully, she won't never know. But I couldn't believe that my fame was again, putting her life in crappy position. The guys just used her because she knew me.

For a few weeks I was lost. I left Ibiza in a rush, unable to look at her, or at the guys in the eyes after the night before. I knew how I disappointed everyone and couldn't face it. I wrote her what could look like a love letter. I just wanted to let her know that there was more that she thought she knew, if she let me the chance to explain myself.

There was so much that I wanted to tell her. A letter wasn't enough.

When I wrote it, I was sure that she would call me afterwards.

But she didn't, call.

I took her for granted, and I lost her. For odd reasons, I'd always thought that she would always be there with me, no matter how many time I would screw up. What a mistake.

After couple of months. No knowing what to do, and pacing up and down like a caged lion. For my own sanity, I had to leave England. I had to leave Holmes Chapel.

The hiatus was supposed to give us time to experience new things. As my relationship with Emma hadn't changed, I flew to LA and auditioned to play in the Christopher Nolan's movie, DUNKIRK.

But when I got back, I got sick of waiting.

As I was in London, and so was her. I just went to her dorms, and knocked at her door. The students stared at me like I grew two heads when I crossed the campus to reach her building. They didn't believe they eyes to see me there. I made it to her door, and couldn't help the smile when she opened the door and see me leaning against the door frame, totally puzzled. I didn't have the time to knock, she was on her way to go out, I was busy taking a long deep breath.

There was so much I wanted to tell her. When she opened the door. She was ready to meet up with her roommate who was waiting for her with bunch of friends in a pub close to campus. Looking at her from head to toe, she was perfectly done up, wearing light make-up, white top under a leather jacket and a freaking hot black skirt, and high heels.

How could I not turn insane?

"Harry, what are you doing here?" she asked, and that's the only words I'd heard.

I pressed my lips against hers, and took a hold of her head in my hands. The kiss was heated, and she let me deepened the kiss. I felt how goosebumps were raising on her skins under my touch, and I knew she was okay with this. Making her step back, I lead her to her bed, and laid her down, me on top of her. Plopping myself on one arm. Spreading her legs to make room for me, I broke the kiss and took a look at her. Her both hands were gripping my upper arms.

Her eyes locked with mine. Her swollen lips were appealing; I saw lust into her eyes. All I wanted was to make love to her. No words could express what I felt for her, I just wanted to show her, how caring I could be. How caring I was.

We finally spent the night, together. It was where I belonged, and where she belonged. Into my hold. Hearing her moan, and scream my name made me lose my mind. I was walking in the clouds.

My womanizer reputation would take a blow.

She agreed.

She agreed to give it a try.

Step by step.

We texted, and called each other a bit, for two weeks. It was like we were freaking teenagers, learning to know each other. It was pretty fun though, and it was very light. Kind of things we hadn't had for ages. I smiled like an idiot when I received and read her texts, and it was definitely good sign. She was trusting me again.

And then, there was the night the guys and I had to sing at Mark's pub. I thought it was a bad idea for press, because people would think hiatus was over, but that was not the issue.

When I walked in, I saw her. Didn't know she would be there though. My heart started to race in my chest when I saw her. But it wasn't mutual.

Our eyes locked, and she seemed so tensed, distant and cold.

It was strange, how she acted when she saw me, so I didn't even try to come to talk to her.

Maybe I misunderstood the signals. Maybe she wasn't that comfortable to be back with me. She might be having second thoughts.

She simply avoided me, like I wasn't even in the room. I knew we didn't want the guys to know that we were in touch, for obvious reasons, but she was allowed to say me hi.

I sang for her, I tried to send her a message, since I hadn't seen her since we... two weeks ago. But she ran away.

She stood me up there and literally ran away.

I tried to ask Louis what was wrong with her, but he didn't say a word. He knew something but didn't want to tell me. Sometimes it was bugging me how they were on her side. If something was wrong with her I should have known.

That night confused me. I thought we were making progress, but I was wrong.

So the next morning, I just packed my stuff, and let the guys know that I was heading to France for filming a movie. They were happy for me, and wished me good luck. My mother cried, seeing me leave again, she was getting used to having me towards her, even if she knew it wouldn't last. It had been years since we had spent that much time together.

I left earlier, but I needed to get out of here.

**

It's been a week since I was in Dunkirk. It felt odd. It was the first time that I was on stage for shooting a movie, which will be titled as the city where it took place, Dunkirk, directed by Christophe Nolan.

It was all I needed.

I needed to get out of Holmes Chapel, and England, to distract myself for a while. I'd be too busy to think about Emma, because I wanted my acting to work.

As it was my first movie, I would have to commit myself and be good. I had a lot to prove. When I learned I had the part, I was so excited. That was the hiatus was about. It was about to start and do new things, going out of my comfort zone. We would not be the four of us, together, but on our own. It would be a real challenge though. But I liked challenge, and I wanted Dunkirk to be an amazing movie. What was the most important for me, was that people wouldn't think that I got the part because of who I was, but because I was good, and deserved it.

So it put a lot of pressure. And I worked a lot. I loved the screenplay, as it would be a war movie. I learned the script by heart, and kept rehearsing.

As I was leaving the hotel, to head to the beach where the fight filming would take place today. A bunch of fans were waiting for me, in front of the hotel, to see me. It took a lot of time, every day, to greet the fans, but I took the time, they were being so supportive in everything I was doing.

The frenetic yelling coming from the crowd made me having goosebumps raising on my skin. The way the fans were always there for me, for us, was very touching, and I felt overwhelmed every time I heard them calling my name.

We have instruction young lady; Mister Styles is not waiting for anyone. I heard the guards saying. The altercation made me stop as I was walking to the truck, and listened to it.

I told you, I know him. the girl's voice said. They always said that to pass the security, which made me chuckled.

Please, don't make this difficult The guy added, sounded annoyed by the girl's behavior.

Harry The girl yelled, and I immediately recognized her voice. I frowned, as I got lost, wanting to pinch myself to make sure I heard it well. Turning on my heels, I looked at the crowd, and scanned all the faces. Scrutinizing every girl fans, I locked my eyes with the girl, blocked by the security guys, shoving her hand at me. My eyes opened wide, and she smiled when her eyes met mine.

Sparks appeared in my eyes at the sight of Emma. She must have received my text, letting her know that I was thinking about her, a lot, and missing her.

In a hurry, I headed over her, and my guards were caught by surprise by my sudden move, and attempt to meet the crazy crowd.

"Let her come in" I instructed to the security guy. As I walked faster, adjusting my beanie. Now that I cut my hair, I felt odd, so I kept wearing beanies, even in summer days. "Let her come in" I repeated, and he finally heard me. He was confused, but did what I asked, shrugging, and Emma ran over me.

"What are you doing here?" I asked with a crazy smile growing on my face. She seemed in good mood, and I was astonished to see her here. I laughed at the scene, her, being blocked by my guards...

She didn't say anything. She came over me, and stopped in front of me, only inches away, and our eyes locked again. I could drown in her chestnut eyes. She looked so beautiful. The light wind blowing her long dark hair, softly. I hadn't seen her for too long, and she was even more beautiful than ever. Pulling a strand of hair behind her ear, brushing her cheek with my finger, I fixed my gaze on her. Wearing only a pair of dark blue skinny jeans, leather jacket, white top, and white Converse sneakers, she looked casual but incredible.

She smiled, and soon, her both arms were wrapped around my neck, and she pressed her lips against mine. Even if I was caught by surprise, I let her. I let her kiss me, unable to move. It was like I had frozen on site.

Was I dreaming?

Everyone was staring at us. I knew it. But I didn't care. I heard how people jaw dropped, and some fans started to yell, cry. I heard how everyone was taking pictures of us. Completely dumbfounded.

But I didn't care.

She knew that I was ready, to be seen with her. So she knew what she was doing. If she was there, I would let her do what she needed to. No matter what the people would write, or say about it.

"Harry" She said, after breaking the kiss, with swollen lips.

My stomach flipped.

My heart skipped a bit.

Butterflies kept growing in my belly.

"Yes princess" I grinned, like an idiot. And I waited for what she was about to say. Well I thought I knew, but I wanted to hear it from her mouth.

"Shit, Harry, I love you" she blurted out.

I remained speechless. And stood there.

"Say something" she hit my shoulder softly, to wake me up. I was lost in my thoughts, and couldn't believe what I'd heard. My arms tightened her even more. My heart started pounding in my chest, and I felt like it could burst of happiness.

"Let's start over" she added, bringing me back on earth.

"Damn, I love you" I finally splat. And her smile grew bigger.

So I lifted her up, her arms still firmly wrapped around my neck. Giving her a dimpled grin.

We were making the show, and for once, it wasn't because of a fight. I kissed her again, strongly, one of my hand holding her head in it, and the other one resting on her lower back.

"God, princess, you just made me the happiest man in the world" I said to her, after breaking the kiss.

Sparks appeared in her eyes, and seeing her that happy made me melt.

It was finally happening.

Pulling her down, her feet touching the ground. She turned her head, and took a look at her surroundings, realizing what just happened, publicly. Staring at our audience, she looked a bit confused, but I grabbed her hand, to comfort her. This was the life she would have for now on. She would live on spotlight.

"We should leave" I said, after putting her down, everyone was watching us, and it became odd. I led her to the car. She followed me, but her facial expression changed from happy to kind of worry. She was holding my hand tight, and sighed, unsure of what she was saying. We were climbing in the car, and the security closed the door behind us.

As she sat beside me, she furrowed her eyebrows. "Harry, there's something I need to tell you".

Thoughts?

So it was the last chap. There will be an epilogue, but we have arrived to the end of the story. Thank you guys so much for reading, I had loved reading your comments, and felt blessed by your votes. I am working on another story, that I won't publish too soon. Please be free to share your stories with me, so I could read it. I will take the time to read, as I won't publish things soon, after the epilogue.

Love you all. XXxxx