Apparently going on a hiatus for like six months allowed me to subconsciously think of all kinds of plot points for this story and now I think I'm ready to end it.

Next chapter, I think.

- Nico_Solace

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

=Nico=

1:07 AM

The call came about four hours after Will left my house.

I wasn't expecting it, not even a little.

Will has always been so careful. Even when he was mad or we were in the middle of an argument he was never reckless. He always wore his seatbelt, he always waited five seconds before going at a green light, he never touched his phone, he kept both hands on the wheel, he rarely drove at night and never drove when he was tired. Will didn't let one ounce of distraction come in front of him while he was driving.

Getting a frantic call from Cecil that Will was being rushed into surgery in the middle of the night because of an accident was the scariest moment of my life.

Hazel had to drive because I couldn't focus on anything.

When we arrived at the hospital, Cecil met us at the door. Before he even said hello, he wrapped his arms around me in a tight embrace. I slumped against him and started sobbing, finally breaking my stunned silence. I couldn't breathe and I could barely focus on anything.

Cecil gently led me into the waiting room and sat me and Hazel into some chairs.

"I was about to head to the cafeteria when I saw you outside. Do you want anything? A coffee, snack, anything at all?" I hear Cecil say, but his voice isn't directed at me.

"I'm okay, but could you get Nico coffee? Four sugars and two creams; he likes the dark brews." Hazel speaks up, gently rubbing her hand across my back in a soothing gesture.

"Alright. I'll be back as soon as I can."

With that, Cecil's feet disappear from my line of sight.

---

3:24 AM

My muscles feel stiff. I haven't moved since we got here; the coffee Cecil brought me sits cold and untouched on the table next to me. Hazel fell asleep on my shoulder shortly after Cecil left to the cafeteria.

"I'm sure he'll make it out just fine. You know him; he's stubborn, resilient." Cecil's quiet voice sounds next to me.

"Why did you call me, Cecil?" I croak, my voice scratchy from lack of use.

"What?" I turn my stiff neck to see Cecil looking at me, absolutely baffled.

"Why did you call me? Will and I aren't together. There's no point in me being here. He probably wouldn't even want me here after the hell I've put him through. I mean, all of this is my fault anyway." I rub my hand over my face, trying to scrub away the tiredness weighing on me.

"I called you because you're the only other person I could think that he would want here. Lou didn't answer her phone and Leo couldn't get his mom to wake up. You and Hazel were his only other friends."

"Will has plenty of people he'd rather have here. I caused this; I shouldn't be here."

"Nico..." Hazel's sleep-heavy voice yawned. "What do you mean it's your fault?"

"I yelled at him before he left the house. Yesterday, we spent all day fighting, and the day before that I yelled at him for brushing my shoulder in the hallway. I'm probably the reason he was out driving anyway; he always drives when he needs to think."

"There's no way you can blame yourself for this, Nico." Cecil argued. "You weren't the drunk driver that smashed into his car. You didn't cause this any more than me and Hazel did."

"I did! It's all my fault. If I had just told him... If I hadn't been so stubborn, he wouldn't be in surgery at all. We wouldn't be sitting in the E.R. waiting room." I grip my hair tightly and pull at it in frustration.

"Enough, Jayrius! You had no part in him getting hurt. I will not stand to listen to you blame yourself for something no one but that drunk driver could control. You were not the cause of the accident so you shut up and pray to every god you can think of that he makes it out of that surgery alive." Hazel glares daggers at me.

I was taken so aback by Hazel's exclamation that I could do nothing but nod.

"Good. I'm going to get food; let me know if we get any news."

---

7:38 AM

"Mrs. Markowitz?" A doctor calls out from the other side of the waiting room.

Cecil's mother is on her feet before her name is finished.

"Yes? Is he alright? How is my son?" She said, frantically searching the doctor's eyes.

Hearing her call Will her son made my heart clench painfully. She had been a second mother to Will since he was eight and had openly accepted him as her second son when his mother had allowed him to be kicked out. This woman has done nothing but help and support Will since he came into her life and now she might lose him. My chest constricts even tighter when that voice comes back, telling me this is all my fault and I could've stopped it before it happened.

The doctor's voice snaps me out of my thoughts.

"He's fine. He's a strong young man, that's for sure. We managed to stop the internal hemorrhaging and we repaired as much as we could. He's being set up in the ICU right now; we have him in an induced coma to help with his body's natural healing process. He will wake up on his own eventually, whenever his body is ready. Right now, family dictates who is allowed in and who isn't. Your son is one tough cookie, Mrs. Markowitz; I'm sure you'll have him home in no time." The doctor finishes her report with a smile, closing the folder she has in her grasp.

Cecil's mother wraps the unsuspecting doctor in a tight hug for a few seconds before releasing her. "Thank you."

"You're welcome. We'll send out a nurse when he's set up in the ICU."

With that, the doctor walked off.

---

9:52 AM

I couldn't do it.

People have been allowed to visit will for just over an hour now. Cecil and his mom, Lou Ellen, and Hazel are all back in the ICU with him.

Hazel tries to talk me into going back and seeing him, but I couldn't do it. I've seen people in the ICU before and they're almost unrecognizable. They have tubes running from this hole to the next, there are IVs all over their arms, a breathing tube down their neck, beeping machines come from every direction.

Not to mention the cold air. It's almost always freezing in intensive care. The smell of bleach and sterilizers is overwhelming, too. No matter where you turn, there's always something to remind you that it's a hospital and your loved one might die any minute.

I can't bring myself to go look at Will like that. Since I've known Will, he's been nothing but strong. He never lets people's nasty words get to him; he uses them as motivation to work harder and do better. He is never sick, he always shows up for school, he's always laughing.

Will is like a fortress. Nothing can knock him down.

That's exactly why I can't go in and see him. I can't tarnish that image. I can't let my fear get too close. I can't see him when he's covered in tubes, when he can't even feed himself.

I can't.

And I hate myself for being so weak.

Hazel's hand on my shoulder startles me.

"You should go see him." She says softly, her eyes gentle with understanding.

"I can't." I say, shaking my head and looking away from her piercing gaze.

"Yes, you can. He would want you there. Especially if he wakes up soon."

"He's not going to wake up any time soon, Haz. You know this."

"No, we don't. The doctors told us that he could wake up later today or he could wake up weeks from now." Hazel argues.

"Hazel, just drop it! I'm not going in there."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm scared!" I yell, standing to my feet. "I'm terrified of what I'll see if I go in there! I can't handle the thought of him not being there. I'm not going."

"Nico..." Hazel all but whispers.

"No. I'm not going. Just drop it."

---

12:20 PM

Both Hazel and Cecil have spent all morning trying to goad me into going back into Will's room. Each time they try, however, they're unsuccessful.

They've all gone to the cafeteria for lunch. Even Mrs. Markowitz whom hasn't left Will's side since he was cleared for visitors. Again, they tried to get me to join them, but I refused.

I'm not hungry, nor am I thirsty. I don't want to think. I don't want to talk. I don't want anything. I just want my William to be okay.

Taking a deep breath, I finally crack. The room is empty and I really do want to see him...

---

12:45 PM

After arguing with myself for twenty minutes, I finally convince myself to go see him. I have about fifteen minutes before everyone starts heading back in there, so I have to make this quick.

After a quick stop at a nurses' station to get his room number, I find his room.

And I stop.

I look into the window that opens the room up to the hall. I see exactly what I knew I'd see.

He's laying stock straight on the bed in the most unnatural position I've ever seen him in. Will always sleeps on his side, facing away from the door. He's got a breathing tube protruding from his mouth and a feeding tube snaking out of his robe and up to an empty machine. There are heart monitors beeping away and IV tubes taped into his arm and hand. Machines I couldn't even begin to name litter the room, all connected to him one way or another. He's got a cast on his left leg all the way up to his mid thigh, bandages wrap around his torso and shoulder tightly. His right arm is in a sling and he has a neck brace attached to his throat. There are bruises and cuts littering his face and neck that probably scour his entire body.

After standing and staring for a long moment, I shake myself out of it and stumble into the room.

The beeping and whirring of the machines is entirely too loud in the silent room.

Tears brim my eyes and my chin trembles as I sink into the chair next to his bed. Everything goes silent for a moment as I stare, trying to find some sign of life in this pale, bruised body laying in front of me.

Slowly, cautiously, carefully, I reach out and grasp his hand tightly in mine. A weak sob escapes my mouth when I feel that familiar warmth. The comforting feel of his calluses rough against my own. Leaning down, I pull his hand up to my mouth and lay kisses across it reverently. It has been so long since I've been able to show this level of affection to him.

I sit and sob quietly with his hand against my mouth for a long time, finally feeling warmth and hope in that touch; hope that he will be okay. He will make it out of this alive.

"I'm so sorry, Will. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I pushed you away. I'm sorry I ruined everything. I'm sorry. Im so sorry I yelled at you. I didn't mean for this to happen. I was just so upset and angry with myself. I didn't know what else to do. I'm sorry. I'm so, so, so sorry. I love you. I love you so much and I need you to get better. I need you to wake up. Even if you never speak to me again, I need to know you're okay. I need you to wake up for Cecil and Lou and Leo and Cecil's mom... I need you to wake up for everyone that has ever done right by you. And, God dammit I need you to wake up for me. I love you and I can't live knowing you're not in this world, too. So, please... just wake up."

With one last kiss smeared across his knuckles, I gently stop his hand back onto the bed and leave the room.

---

3:32 PM

And now we wait...