one stormy night,
i twisted and turned in my blanket,
fighting down the nightmare. . .

fighting down the memories

the echoes rang in my ears, and whispers enticed me. i pulled back, however, because i knew what it would lead to. parents, fighting and yelling. finding myself crying. it, pulling me into the forbidden, destroying my happiness one by one. my brothers, never getting along. then, of course, the rumors. evil, infamous thoughts that had spread throughout my world. they were untrue and cruel. at this point of time, i just wanted to die and crumble up as ash. this very night, my whole body changed. my hope was once again gone, thanks to this reminder. it's fine though. it's always fine. . .

. . . in the morn, my body refused to get up but gut told me otherwise. i held a sickening feeling in my stomach, head, and heart all day. don't worry though, nobody noticed. nobody noticed because i wore my sewn tight smile. during lunch, my friends asked if everything was okay.

❝i'm fine, don't worry. guys, i'm always fine.❞

i had said, forcing a believable chuckle. they fell for it, i would've too. the fest of the day was just a blur.

it doesn't matter though. it's fine. it's always fine.