It was late at night. From her window, the moon was a sliver in the sky—the city lights masking the twinkling stars.

Being back in this city, so close to home, both homes, was terrifying and euphoric. Like she could finally take in a deep breath, no longer feeling exhausted and drained, something that had been all too frequent in recent months. A bit of color was indeed returning to her skin. Whether it was due to the proximity of a certain male or near their ancestral lands remained a mystery.

If she concentrated hard enough, the mate bond lay just beneath the surface, faint and fragile. Goddess. The idea of reaching across the bond, caressing the string that tethered her heart to his was all consuming. Would he even recognize it or was he too far gone?

Most nights were spent curled in a ball, heart and soul shredding into unrecognizable pieces. He moved on. The bond that was near its breaking point reminded her of it every time he was with another woman, lost to the throws of passion. The pain in her chest was consuming and bitter. But as the years went on, the pain became less and less as her wolf got weaker and weaker.

The bond more than likely no longer required the words of rejection. Time had done enough damage. And once the bond did finally snap, she wouldn't be far behind, her wolf and body too frail to survive the breaking.

This was why she needed to come back—to deliver Emery back to her family.

After all these years, the last thing Amelia wanted was to put her old pack in danger, again, but Damon would do everything in his power to keep her safe. Emery's father would do the same. She was his daughter, after all, but he didn't even know of her existence, and she wasn't about to involve his pack as well.

One pack in the line of fire was enough.

Besides, Emery was a Wandering Moon wolf, direct descendent of Rhea, and chosen daughter of the Moon Goddess. The Wandering Moon was honor-bound to defend her with their lives. The last surviving female of their line. She was precious, and Amelia would give her last breath to protect her child.

Amelia laid back against the downy, plush pillow, remembering a previous conversation with Rey, her other half, her wolf.

It was almost a year ago, one late night in the London Manor.

Amelia had spent all day training Emery, demonstrating on how to scale trees, jumping, and swinging from branch to branch. They had exhausted themselves physically, but most of the day was watching each other falling to the ground, landing in various painful positions. She was fairly certain she had broken her tail bone, but they persisted anyway. Learning to climb and jump through trees disciplined them to be nimble and adapt to any environment. Exploit any resource, even trees.

Amelia and Emery had eaten dinner together with the rest of the pack before retiring separately to their rooms. The bruises and pain that throbbed to the bone must be what it feels like to be run over by a bulldozer.

As she settled down to bed, the pain started up again. It began much the same. Swelling and building into a crescendo that left her lying in bed, clutching at her chest and gasping for breath. Her heart was shattering, slowly tearing itself to pieces.

Amelia. I can't take much more of this. Rey pleaded with her.

Rey had been begging to go back, back to their mate and pack. They were weakening, their powers becoming increasingly difficult to maintain. They hadn't received dreams from the Moon Goddess in a long while.

Amelia knew something was going on, something had changed, and could feel it in her bones. But she didn't realize how serious it was until a friend of hers, an elder who had access to some of their oldest texts, sent her a journal.

Rhea's personal journal.

Rhea had recorded her initial days as a werewolf. The first female werewolf had received countless visions and dreams, interacting with the Moon Goddess in person. Since Rhea and Ezekial were the first mated pair, the Moon Goddess took it upon herself to explain the workings of the mate bond, explaining their connection, their powers, and the consequences if they spat on that gift.

Together, a fated pair was more potent than any others. The male would receive increased strength and speed, keener senses. But the female would receive a unique sort of ability. She would be capable of healing those she touched, command any wolf, whether they be a member of the pack or not, and she could foresee the future. In the time of Rhea, the Moon Goddess deemed her the true Alpha, and once the mating bond was completed, she would come into her rightful power, complete with a dominating aura.

Amelia read through the journal, noting the distinct similarities to her situation, but what she read next stopped her heart, the blood freezing in their veins. The Moon Goddess forewarned them that if fated mates were to separate without severing the bond completely, the female would grow weak and ultimately die. The mate bond was what fueled her power and that power thrived off their bond. Her wolf was alive because of their power.

One could not survive without the other.

Amelia believed she had survived as long as she had due to dumb luck and the stubborn will to live. But ever since they had discovered the truth, Rey had been pleading with her to go back.

You know we can't! Emery's not ready! she said through gritted teeth, the pain reaching its peak.

Amelia, we're dying! It's not going to matter. We'll be gone. Her father could protect her, Rey begged, trying to appeal to some kind of common sense.

He practically died trying to protect us! Don't you remember that? I miss him too. We can't risk his life again. I won't be able to survive it if something were to happen. She ultimately let out her breath she'd been holding onto, the pain finally ebbing and subsiding.

We won't survive either. Amelia, you are more capable than you know. Your strength comes from your love. Let yourself receive love. That is the true sacrifice. True selflessness comes from being loved and receiving that love with everything you have. Don't forget—

Amelia began to panic. Rey's voice faded into silence.

Rey? She called out. Rey, can you hear me?

Rey? "Rey?!" she screamed but was met with absolute and utter quiet.

Amelia could remember the terror like it was yesterday. It had been a year. Some days she could sense a glimmer of Rey. A minor piece of consciousness still holding on in the deepest recesses of their mind.

Ever since that day, she refused to shift, declined to even try, afraid she wouldn't be able to, or worse, it would be the ultimate strain on her wolf. The claws and elongate canines were about all she dared to access, the farthest she was willing to push for.

But being on the same continent, merely a state away from their mate, a faint glimpse of Rey grew a tad brighter, but it was only delaying the inevitable. She could feel it in her heart, her soul. The bond had no more than two weeks left, if it continued to fray as it had been for years and that's if they weren't ambushed, if she didn't have to call on her reserves. The attack on the London Pack Manor took a lot of energy, which was why she brought Emery home.

Emery had tried convincing Amelia to come back sooner. Probably to meet her father. But with no mate of her own, how could she understand? That being with Gabriel again, reforging the bond, would preserve her life and if she did know, that would open a whole other can of worms.

How could Amelia explain to her daughter that the man she was so deeply in love with, her mate, had moved on? Who was having sex almost every night, slowly chipping away at her heart, her soul, and her life.

Yes, reuniting with Gabriel would preserve Amelia's life, but she wasn't about to show up on his doorstep, dying and with their child in tow just to save her own life.

He deserved happiness, even if it meant them never being together.

Does this help explain things with whats going on with Amelia?

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