Dumbledore was at the lowest of the low.

His lowest, he was officially a crackhead.

He would do drugs with the students.

Eat meaningless sweets.

Bro, he was fucked up.

Why? You ask, well his torture victim was not nearly as fun as he had hoped, she didn't even scream, so he erased her memory and returned her, safely. Although, he would still go visit her and give her nightmares of the night he took her away.

He was so low that he had even done drugs with Voldemort, Snape and Umbridge.

Like, what? Umbridge? Dolores fucking Umbridge?

Now, you knew it was bad when you were doing drugs with her, I mean to be fair, her weed wasn't THAT bad.

But it was not the weed Dumbledore was addicted to, no.

It was Sheep Meth.

Sheep Meth was lit.

It was everything.

Especially in Dumbledore's eyes.

Like bro, have you ever tried Sheep Meth?

I mean, like wow.

He wished he could erase the first day he tried Sheep Meth, all because he was simply in too deep.

It had been a student that had provided him with it.

In fact, she and her friend claimed to have made it.

It was the girl Draco was hanging out with, Jessica.

She was a Gryffindor, which meant Dumbledore liked her, much, much more than her friend who, unfortunately was a Slytherin, an evil one at that.

But then again, they were both somewhat evil, but Jessica was a Gryffindor, so that was okay.

Dumbledore had given Jessica one thousand house points the first time she had given him some sheep meth.

He, unfortunately had to give Slytherin some, which sucked.

But hey, he needed the Sheep Meth.

So, he wasn't exactly complaining.

He had also gotten what he believed to be a thing called WiFi.

And bro, there was so much messed up FanFiction, like what?

There was Snamione, Snape X Hermione, like what the fridge bro?

Have some common decency, like bro, c'mon.

And then, there was me X the Potter boy, whatsit, Harry, yes Harry Potter.

Like no, he doesn't deserve these glorious lips.

Like no thank you very much.

And then there was this girl that wrote FanFiction about me and my beloved Sherbet Lemons, now that was a little bit more acceptable, but how dare she try and steal our love.

How dare she try and take the credit for creating our relationship, or 'ship' as she liked to call it.

And then, there was this girl, Jessica that had created Triddle, Tom Riddle X her best friend, like Wowwww.

I don't know what people see in Tom, to be honest.

Like, sure he used to be OKAY looking, before I told him about Horcruxes, but like, not anymore.

I mean, bro come on.

And then, Dumbledore passed out on top of his desk, beside some Muggle beverage he believed to be called 'coffee'.

Right after he had read all about Muggle Pancakes and the Disgraced and Befallen, HENRYHOLIERTHANTHOU.

Wow, what a night.

Am I right?

Author's Notes:

Hello, it is I.

I am so, so sorry if this has offended anybody.

It is for entertainment purposes only.

I do know addiction is a serious thing and should not be messed with.

This chapter was not meant to offend anybody, it was solely me acting upon a joke the amazing JessietheGryffindor and I made about Snape, Voldemort and Dumbledore smoking weed and eating yoghurt together.

Why on Chuck's unholy soil did past me think this was okay 😂