A/N : I was trying to challenge myself by writing in present tense. But it doesn't suit me so... ಠ ಠ And writing in first P.O.V. but this one is okay.

To friends who know how my dream goes; I'm funny, right? I dont even expect I would be so serious about making my dream into a story... I'm not gonna put myself and the entire real scene in here. There might be some familiar scene but uhm.. you know... The names... I change them 👀
And I'm making this into more an adult image.

And yes, I cringe... I punched my own thighs at every cringing scene.

Uhm...

While I'm at the corner of the room, crying, cringing, punching my own thihgs and hating myself for being over imaginative... 😭

Enjoy(?) 😬

----------

It had been years since I left school. I didn't counts years passed as I rather like enjoying to live without worrying of my age, of time or living without thinking of how annoying school could be and at this moment, I was focusing on my own business.

I was a handicraft maker. I made bracelets and keychains, and sold them online.

The annoyance came back when I got notifications that I was added in a group chat. I wondered who added me. I barely like chatting in groupchat, especially with people who I was barely close with.

When I checked the group, I recognized some usernames as they were close to their real names. My friends – Seo Jihoon, Choi Yeri and Kang Kira – who I was still in contact with, were also added in the group chat.

While the groupchat were starting to flood the chats notifications, I calmly set it as muted. ALWAYS! I smiled that I finally put the group's notifications to silent.

Then, I decided to send private messages to three of my friends.

×××××

•• Seo Jihoon ••
last seen yesterday at 19:34

- bro
- what is this...????

×××××

•• Choi Yeri ••
last seen today 11:23

- girl...
- what is this group's purpose???
- can I leave the group?
- it's not important to me

×××××

•• Kang Kira ••
online

- Kiki
- how is you?
- the group, I mean
- you okay?

×××××

I didn't expect to get an immediate response from Jihoon as I knew he had been busy. But I got an immediate response from Kira. I knew she was free all day since she's having semester holidays at that moment. She was taking PhD. Eh, we got a future doctor.

×××××

•• Kang Kira ••
online

- Kiki
- how is you?
- the group, I mean
- you okay?

- yea, I'm okay
- hbu?

××××××

We were exchanging questions. Yep, we had unwanted memories at school. But we both know we were okay with talking about the matters. They were in past now. But I sensed that both of us were scoffing at that moment.

When I remember the list of contacts in the group chat I just went through earlier, there was a number that I always remembered. A number who I always ended up sharing so much stories. That familiar number.

Fire from the past slowly rekindled. Nonetheless, I chose to reply Kira 'I'm okay too.'

×××××

•• Kang Kira ••
online

- Kiki
- how is you?
- the group, I mean
- you okay?

- yea, I'm okay
- hbu?

- yeah, I'm okay too
- I wonder what's this group purposes anw
- I don't feel like caring what they gonna discuss there

- idk
- it's better to see all the texts at the end of the day

- I don't think they'll be sleeping at the end of the day
- groupchats are always noisy 😂
- but tea~ 😌

- Omg hahahaha

×××××

I left Kira's text just the way it was with a light smile on my face. I was about to put down my phone to continue making the customized bracelet that was ordered by a customer when another notification came.

I let out a soft sigh as I lifted my phone up. My phone kept buzzing because of the way Yeri message. She talked smoothly, but the way she sent messages though...

×××××

•• Choi Yeri ••
online

- girl...
- what is this group's purpose???
- can I leave the group?
- it's not important to me

- it's a group
- with a plan
- of
- class reunion

- I don't think I'll be joining
- I can leave the group, right?

- well
- it's up to you

×××××

Yes, I chose to leave the groupchat. Not my matter to mind with. Call me mean or whatever, but I felt good that I started anew.

I didn't want to return to the tiring past. It felt good to step in the present time and I wanted to look forward for the future already.

**********

Yeri wanted to go but she had no transport to attend the reunion. She told me about how she was curious about the people and that, she didn't have a transport to go. Out of pity, I volunteered. Our houses were only a few meters away, so I thought it would be better to go with her.

She's an adult and she could have her own driving licence but her parents didn't allow her. I couldn't understand her parents...

I wanted to say 'no' to myself and her, but I kind of feeling bad to do that to her. She was one of those person who had been staying with me and knew that adulting was when we understood that friendship without daily conversation was still a friendship. We didn't push each other to catch up. We both had our own commitments, and I was very sure this applied to most friendships.

I knew I had an terrible issue with someone in the past. But for Yeri, I had to keep the issue in a box and hid it somewhere where I could hide my emotions. Hopefully, I could hide my emotions well.

"Hanmi-yah, you don't need to go if you don't want to go. I can stroll around some places while waiting for my parents to pick me up."

I chided, "hey! Letting you stroll around places alone? Remember that you're a girl. No, I'm not letting that!"

I heard Yeri sighed. "Will you be okay though?"

I looked at her. With a calm tone, I told, "I'll be okay. Don't worry."

Yeri gave up eventually and let me do what I wanted. It would be the best to accompany her. Yeri was good at socializing but she also had the saddening past with some people in the class back then.

Jihoon wouldn't be going. He had a rugby training on the reunion day. Kira wouldn't be going too, for reasons that only she and I could understand.

Me. I guess, I could stay at the event longer if the food were enough.

It looked like I had to confront the past too.

**********

Kim Namjoon.

A guy who I met years before. I didn't remember when was our first meeting, but it all started when he and his friend, Jimin, booked bracelets online. They ordered metal customized bracelets with words carved on them.

Don't ask me what words they were. I had too many clients. So, once orders done and sent, my brain systems deleted clients' data the next day.

I thought they were going to stop ordering from me. But it went on – he ordered thread bracelets, charm bracelets, jelly bracelets and customized name keychains – until a man who introduced himself as the one who-always-ordered-accessory's manager contacted me on Instagram and said that he wanted to meet me at a café.

But I ended up meeting Kim Namjoon, not Mr Manager. He wore a casual attire that day, with beanie hat on his head. This influential man. I remember I was intimidated when I first met him. But he's an easygoing, cool and friendly guy that made me loosened up a little fast.

We exchanged numbers at the end of the day and talked and chatted when we got the time to do it.

Time past real quick. We became more daring to meet up in the public. But of course, with Namjoon wearing hat or mask to conceal his identity. I had to wear mask too sometimes. The air in South Korea wasn't always healthy and there were people like me who were allergic to dust. That's why, unlike most countries that only give weather forecast, we also get news of how the air's condition at the moment.

Then, one day;

"Hanmi, do you like me?"

I gulped when I heard the question. But once I became comfortable around someone, I wouldn't be able to conceal my silliness anymore. So, being silly I always was, I replied, "who don't like you? Many people idolize you. Count me in one of them."

"I mean, how about as more than an idol?" Namjoon looked at me with eyebrows raised.

I was stuttering when I admitted. I was not brave. Who was brave when someone was stuttering so bad and your body feeling hot because of shyness?!

Shorting the story and just like that, we dated.

I had to admit we were a little awkward when we first dated. Namjoon was a brave, bold guy but he had a shy side too.

At this moment, it's a few been months since we dated. We were going through a typical couple things and phase. Arguments due to the clash of opinions were normal, still we always backed down or dropped the topic.

For this time, only Choi Yeri knew about us. As for my family, Jihoon and Kira, I didn't think it was the right time for them to know yet.

And guess what happened?

Someone came in the picture or he actually existed before we dated but chose to hide in the shadow.

I didn't like that.