CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE: HEAL TOMORROW !

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TWO MONTHS INTO HER BREAK AND CASEY HAD DECIDED TO TAKE A FEW EXTRA WEEKS OFF, WHICH WERE NEEDED. Casey had taken that time to heal and to spend time with her son.

        Chris had gone back to school but it had been the weekend and he wanted to spend time with his mom. The boy and Casey were currently at the club, meeting with someone that could help them.

        "So, you don't wanna sell it." The man started and Casey pinches the bridge of her nose. "I do, I just..." She glances over at her son, who's having fun with his toys in the corner of the room.

       "I think my brother and Leah's fiancé should decide what to do with the club. This can't just be up to me. But they're still grieving and I'm the only one that's around anymore." Casey told.

        "It's been months and we still don't have a foreclosure contract." Casey had decided to sell Club LIC and figured that maybe Isaac or Wes or maybe even her father could do something with it. She didn't know what to do with it, either.
       "I know, I just..." Casey sighs.
       "You need more time."
       "I need more time with a lot of things." She stated. "I promise, I'll try and call my brother and see what we can do."

       The man pauses. Isaac hadn't been in contact with her since what happened at the funeral. Wes had still been hitting that grieving point so she didn't want to bother him either. "Why don't you give me his number?" The man asks. "I'll message him for you." He knows the struggles Casey's been going through. "Thank you."

Casey looked around. She really didn't want to sell this club, it was Leah's to touch, no her. But she wasn't given much choice. "Hey, what does LIC even stand for anyways?"

"It's us," Casey answers. "Leah, Isaac, Casey. We're LIC." She looks around again at the empty space. "I mean, at least we used to be." She says sadly.

          It was sad to know that this was the end of an era. An era that shouldn't have been done so early. It deserved to last longer. And Leah deserved to live longer. Casey took a breath as the lights to the buildings shut down and she runs a hand through her hair and tries to push those nasty thoughts away that tell her that she shouldn't be doing this. But there was no choice but to.

After the meeting at the club, Casey buckled Chris up in his car seat and asks what he wants to do for the rest of the day. Chris tells his mom that he wants to go to park, maybe have a picnic. Since Casey had needed to get some grocery shopping done, she promised that after the shopping, they would go to the park and he could get a few snacks while he was there.

So, the two were currently in the store when JJ had called Casey and Casey explained everything that happened down at the club. "You're selling the club?" JJ asked.

Casey shrugged, "I don't have much use for it, I mean, the club was Leah's and Leah isn't around anymore so... that's my next big thing to take care of." She tells as she grabs a box of Chris's favorite cereal off the shelf. "You don't have to do this by yourself, you know." JJ assures and Casey sighs, "I know, I just... I prefer doing things alone. You know I do."

Suddenly, Chris comes running up next to his mom with a bag of gummy bears. "Can I get this?" He asks. "Yeah, go ahead." Casey nods as he placed the candy in the cart.

"What are you doing?" JJ wonders. "Grocery shopping with Chris. We need to restock on some things. And we're going to the park so I also needed to get some snacks for that, too." Chris points to the bottle of apple juice on the shelf. "Yeah, put that in." Casey said and Chris had gotten on his tippy-toes and placed the apple juice in the cart.

"Good to know you're out and about." JJ said. "Yeah, well I had to get out of that bed sometime." Casey mutters to JJ, but it sounds like she's saying it to herself.

Suddenly, Casey wonders something that's in the back of her mind. "Uh, is Spencer there?" She asks and JJ pauses, "Uh, yeah. Why?" Casey shrugged, no one had known that Casey was considering getting back together with Spencer. She hadn't told anyone. "Just wondering. Uh, he said was taking Chris tonight, so.." She came up with an excuse on the spot.

"Ah," Some rustling is heard on JJ's side and then she speaks, "Okay, well, I have to go. If you need anything—"
"I know. Call you." Casey says. "Bye."

With that, Casey had hung up and told Chris to follow her to the next aisle to get a bag of chips for both her and Chris. Casey had asked Chris which type of chips he wanted and she suddenly felt eyes lingering on her.

"Casey Willows?" Casey furrows her brows as she looks up and to her shock, she finds a familiar face. A man she hasn't seen in almost eight years, a childhood friend, an ex-boyfriend.

"Marco?" She asks, almost in disbelief.

And of course, standing in front of her was Marco Rossi, David Rossi's nephew that Casey dated eight years ago. And the last time she had seen him was eight years ago when they had come to a mutual breakup. And they haven't spoken since.

Casey almost thought her eyes were deceiving her when she saw him. He looked older now, his hair was dark and curly with a few gray hairs — not many though. His smile was still the same, warm and welcoming.

"Hey." Marco began, approaching closer to Casey. "Oh my gosh." Casey laughed as she opened her arms and greeted him with a hug.

The hug was short-lived and Casey furrowed her brows. What was he doing in DC? When they dated, he was over in Syracuse. Perhaps he was visiting?

"What are you doing here?" Casey wonders. "I, uh, live in DC. It's a long story." Marco answers. Casey notes to the things in his cart — a few cans of Spaghetti-O's, a six-pack of beer and a jug of apple juice.

Suddenly, Casey directs her attention to her son. "This is okay, right?" Chris asks, holding up a bag of cheddar cheese Ruffles chips.

Marco kneels down to meet Chris's level. "Who's this little guy?" He wonders. "Marco, this is my son, Christopher." Casey introduces and Marco looks at Casey in the utmost disbelief. His eyes are wide and his jaw nearly drops to the ground. The Casey Willows with a son? Last they checked, she never wanted kids. "Y-Your son?"

Casey nods, "And Christopher, this is Marco, he's an old friend of mine, he's also Uncle Dave's nephew." She introduces Chris to Marco. "So your uncle Dave is also my Uncle Dave." Marco joked. "Hi." Chris said, he always got quiet around strangers but he was still polite.

Marco stands up and looks at Casey. "You have a son." It's almost as if Marco is trying to comprehend the fact that Casey had a son. Casey nodded, "I do."

"We definitely have a lot to catch up on." Marco chuckled and Casey nodded in agreement, "Definitely a lot." There's a pause. "Well, after this, we were gonna head down to the park. Would you care to join us if you're not doing anything?"

"If that's fine with Christopher." Marco nods to the boy and Casey looks back at her son. "What do you say, Chris?" Chris then nodded, happy that he was being accounted for. "Yeah!"

"Then, I have time on my hands." Marco smiles and with that, Casey grabs ahold of her cart but before they can continue, Marco stops her. "Hey," He looks at her. "Stai ancora imparando l'italiano?" Which meant: 'You still learning Italian?'

       Casey smirked and her heart skipped a damn beat when she heard Marco speaking Italian. Damn, that always did something to her. "È un po' arrugginito qua e là." That meant: 'It's a little rusty here and there'. And by that sentence alone, it sounded like she definitely needed to take lessons again.

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When they'd gotten to the park, Casey and Marco had sat at a nearby bench to chat while Christopher played on the playground. Marco and Casey hadn't chatted about much quite yet.

"So how old is Christopher?" Marco started. "He's almost six." Casey answered. "Yeah, my daughter's about the same age." Marco told, making Casey furrow her brows in wonderment. "You have a daughter?" She asks and suddenly feels like him she announced she'd had a son.

Marco grabbed his phone out of his pocket and pulled out a photo of the little girl on his back. "Giulia." Marco said as he showed her. "Oh, she's so cute." Casey complimented.

"Yeah, she's a little spitfire, like her mom. Lucinda." Marco stated. "I met her, I think a year after we broke up. She was a bartender and I was heartbroken. Two years later, came little Giulia. She was a good mother." Casey was glad that he had found someone after her. But she backtracked to him speaking about her in the past tense.

Casey furrowed her brows and Marco looked down as he stuffed his phone back in his pocket. "She died earlier last year, cancer." Casey frowns as she places a comforting hand on his arm. "I'm sorry." She apologizes. "Christopher had leukemia. It developed when he was three. It kind of drove a wedge between me and his dad for a little while. Things like that, you don't recover from. Lucky for us, he got cancer free as of last year."

"That's great." Marco said. "My, uh, my sister helped us out a lot when we found out Lucinda had cancer. That's currently where little Giulia is now." He pauses and then shakes his head. "But sorry with the sadness all of a sudden.
What's-what's new with you?" He wonders.

Marco faces towards her fully and Casey smiles and tries to think of what to start with. "You're looking at the new Unit Chief of the FBI." She said and Marco raises his brows. "Really?" He sounds interested to hear this. He thought Aaron Hotchner would've never left that job.

"Yeah, Hotch left and he handed the job off to Emily and then Emily handed it off to me, it's-it's kind of a long story." Casey thinks again. "I found out I have half-siblings, also kind of a long story."

Marco furrows his brows. "Half-siblings?" Casey nods, "Yes. There was Leah and there's Isaac." Marco furrows his brows, much like Casey did when he spoke of Lucinda in the past tense. "Was?"

Casey swallows and takes a deep breath. This would be the first time she'd tell this story to someone. I mean, someone other than her team. It felt too real to stop and ignore it now, Marco seemed invested. "Leah died a couple months ago," Casey admitted. "I guess you can say my past came to bite me in the ass and she was the target."
Marco pulls a sympathetic face and places a hand on her arm. "I'm sorry." He tells. Casey shrugs, "It's okay."

Marco decides to turn Casey's attention to something else. Anything else so he can turn that frown upside down. "Are you watching Christopher by yourself?" He wonders genuinely.

"Actually, no..." Casey can't wait to see the look on his face when she tells him this. "Do you remember Spencer Reid?"
Marco thinks back to Casey's coworker. "Tall, lanky dude that looks like a stick? He helps you out?"
"Kinda has to. He's Christopher's dad." Casey admits and Marco's jaw drops as he looks back at Christopher and points at him with raised brows.

"He's Christopher's dad?" Marco questions and Casey chuckles and nods, "Yes." Marco leans back in his seat and thinks about what he's just learned. "You guys together. Wow. Can't say I'm surprised."

Casey furrows her brows as Marco continues. "I should've known. You know back when we had that thing going on, he was definitely jealous." Casey was taken aback at the assumption. "He was not jealous."

"Oh, yes, he was." Marco nodded as he sat up more on the bench. "He always looked at me like he wanted my head to explode." Casey laughed at the possibility of that. Who knows? Maybe he was jealous. (He was).

"I think he was just being protective." Casey assumes and Marco shakes his head, "I call that being jealous." The two laugh again.

"How long were you guys together?" Marco asks. Casey thinks back. "Almost six years. We were married for two, almost three. But we broke up. That's a longer story." Marco nods at Casey, "Sorry to hear that."

"Yeah," Casey sighs. "We just... we were going through a lot at the time. And... things just got complicated. But... we're still good. Christopher still needs his dad around."

         All of a sudden, there's a thud in the park and Casey looks to find her son on the ground near the rock-climbing structure. "Ow!" Chris exclaims and Casey immediately stands up when she sees his son. "Chris!"

         Chris sits up and he looks at his bloody knee and a gash. "Are you okay?" Casey asks, kneeling to his level. "I hurt my knee." Chris says. "Ooh. I'm sorry, kiddo." Casey turns back to Marco, who is right behind her. "Hey, there are band-aids in my bag, small pink container, could you get them for me, please?" Marco nods, "Yeah."

         Marco finds the container and grabs out a giant Spider-Man bandaid and walks over to them with the bandaid. "You know, Christopher, when I was little, there was a park near my house." Marco got on a knee as he began to open the bandaid. "I used to go on the monkey bars all the time. I used to climb so high and I was really good at it, too. All the kids wanted to be like me, even your mom." Casey smiled as he continued.

         "And one day, I fell really hard and ran back home and told my grandmother since no one else had been home. She looked at me, grabbed my knee, starting rubbing it and said: "Sana sana colita de rana, si no sanas hoy, sanarás mañana" I was really confused by what that meant because well, my whole family's Italian and that was Spanish."

           Casey laughs as Marco places the bandaid over Chris's knee. "But after that, I felt instantly better. Do you want the chant?" Chris nods at Marco. "Yeah."
         "Sana sana colita de rana, si no sanas hoy, sanarás mañana." Marco smiles. "And you are magically healed."

         "Are you a magician?" Chris asks as he looks at his knee. Casey laughs and jokes, "Yes, he is. Marco the Magician." A hint of blush appeared on Marco's face as he smiled.

        "No one can beat Dad though." Chris said as he stood up. Casey nodded in agreement, "Yeah, you're right about that."

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Marco and Casey had been going back to the car as Christopher ran ahead, playing with his toys. "You said your daughter was Christopher's age?" Casey wondered.

"Yeah, she's, uh, with my sister right now. I always try to give them girl time so Giulia can have that. She can't be around boring old dad all the time." Marco tells as they reach the car.

       "How is your sister?" Casey wonders. "She's good, she's good." Casey buckles Christopher in his car seat and she closes the door once she has him settled and now it's just Marco and Casey. "You know, way back when, I never would've imagined you with a kid." Marco stated. "You know, I can say the same thing for you." Casey said.

       "What changed?" Marco wondered. Casey shrugs as she crosses her arms. "I don't know, I guess... I guess Spencer made it seem like it was possible to have a family even with this job." She admitted. "I never wanted to... be like Hotch... so cooped up in my work. I make as much time for him as I can considering I'm unit chief now." Marco nods in response and she nods her head at him, "And what about you? What changed?"

          Marco thinks for a minute. "I guess Lucinda made it seem possible too. We met down in Syracuse but we both got offered jobs here and it was a fresh start away from everything." He admits. "Lucinda became an injury lawyer after bartending just couldn't pay the bills anymore and I got an offer at the PD, good hours, I spend more time being a stay-at-home dad though. Especially since Lucinda."

        "You still working as a detective?" Casey asks. "A detective on the less dangerous cases. Now that I have a daughter to think about. She wants to be like her dad, though. And honestly, her determination... it reminds me a lot of you."

         Casey looks up and smiles at the compliment. She was happy to see that Marco had gotten somewhere in life and that he seemed happy enough to have this life. For a moment, she'd seen his eyes linger and for a moment, hers did too.

Marco looks down as he speaks. "You know, I used to call you the one that got away. And honestly, I... didn't know how I was gonna get over you." Casey shrugs, "I am kind of hard to forget." She jokes.

"I'd be lying if I didn't say I imagined my future with you a lot of the time. Wondering how our lives may have turned out had I not been so selfish back then." Marco stated and Casey shook her head, "You weren't selfish, you just... wanted us to be together. And the back and forth thing got old real quickly. I get it. I don't regret how our past turned out. That's just the way life works."

Casey definitely always said that Marco was one of her better ex-boyfriends. Next to Sawyer, of course. But their breakup didn't end with him almost killing her, or him dying or something drastic like that. It ended normally and healthy. Of course, it took so much strength to not go running back to him but her life was in Virginia and Quantico.

"Maybe if it turned out a little differently." Marco thought and Casey shrugged, "Yeah, maybe." She takes a breath. "But... I was 22, you were 23. We were different people back then. It's okay things just turned out different."

"Do you think about it?" Marco wondered and Casey thinks about the question. And she decides to be honest, "Definitely a lot more now. There were times where me and Spencer were together and... I wondered. But I think everything just fit into place at the time. But... now... especially since you're standing here in front of me... I think about it a lot more. But... since my sister died, I've been kind of off dating for now."

Marco nods at Casey in understanding. "Right." He backs away, not wanting to do anything to advance himself towards her. He doesn't want to make her uncomfortable and she can sense it.

"And I think, I need time to weigh in my options here. If that's okay?" Casey asks and Marco nods, "That's more than okay. I get it." He suddenly grabs a pen out of his pocket and grabs Casey's hand to hastily and quickly write his number down on it. "I'll be here though, when you decide." He clicks his pen back in his pocket and begins to walk backwards to his car. "I don't give up that easy."

Casey smiles to herself and goes into her car and feels her heart skip a beat. She suddenly feels like that twenty-two year old again as she sees him getting into his car through her rearview mirror. When she watches him, a sudden realization pops up. She's considering getting back together with Spencer... and she's told him about it... but Marco... but... oh God.

When she watches Marco drive off, she puts her head against the wheel. The dating scene was not in the projects for her at the moment. Especially after everything. And she swore by that. But when the time came... who would she choose? And would she be happy with whoever she chose?

           Casey started the engine and began to drive. When she realized, she passed her street, she kept going. She didn't know where she was going but she knew she was going somewhere. Marco and Spencer both entered her mind. This was obviously not something she had to worry about right away with, but when something else, or rather someone else, came to mind, Casey spent her time worrying and wondering that whoever she chose, the other would get hurt.

          Soon enough, Casey found herself near a park. It wasn't really a part though. When she got a closer look at the graves, she realized she was in a cemetery. Dead trees, red and orange leaves hanging off of them. Graves positioned behind dead flowers or yet growing flowers and pinwheels.

        Why the hell was she in a—? Oh.

Casey told Chris to go and play with his toys around the graveyard as she took care of some business. When she had that handled, Casey realized just what she had to do and why she was here in the first place. She remembered where they buried her. And the fact that that was the last time she'd ever seen her. It was time for her to pay a visit in due time. She stuffs her hands in her back pockets as she approaches the gravestone closely.

Lenora Vienna Ryleigh
December 8th, 1993 — August 12th, 2019
A beloved friend, daughter and sister.

          Casey told herself to walk back to the car if she wasn't able to do this. She almost thought she'd take Chris out of here and go. The guilt consumed her more often than not at this moment in time. Casey looks down at the scars on her arm and takes a deep breath.

           That man was gone.
           And he could no longer hurt anyone anymore.
          She reminded herself that over and over.

         Casey kneels down on her knees. How did people do this? How was she able to say anything to Leah without immediately feeling like she was the one that got her killed? She began to try and push that guilt aside as she began to speak to the gravestone.

"Hey," she began. "I'm sorry I haven't been to visit you in a while. I, just... I've been so busy, I—" Casey pauses when she realizes she isn't being honest and chuckles to herself at the lie and sighs as she pinches the bridge of her nose. "Who am I kidding? I just didn't want to see you. I'm sorry, I just... I want to see you more, I just... I'm scared. And I'm looking for some advice right now. And you always gave the best advice... so... I guess that's why I'm here."

Casey sits criss-crossed as she begins to pick at the grass. "So... I met a guy. Not necessarily met a guy, I mean, we reconnected. He's just somebody from my past. And I had a really good time with him. And he has a daughter and he lost his wife to cancer. And he's still that same guy I fell for years ago. And I wanna see if we can pick up where we left off."

Casey bit her lip in thought. "But the thing is... I told Spencer I wanted to try again and I can already hear the lecturing "Casey!" coming out of your mouth." She jokes, knowing how her sister was.

"I... I don't know why I told him that, I just... I want us to be a happy family again. I mean, he's changed but he's still the same good person I've known since the beginning. But Marco... he just... makes me feel happy. And that I don't have much or anything to worry about. And of course, Spencer made me feel that way too, but... from Marco, it's different. And I know this is gonna sound like a shitty thing to say, but with him... I don't have to carry burdens around. He wouldn't use my flaws against me and I know I said that Spencer's changed but... what if I haven't?"

"What if I find a way to ruin it again? What if we realize we can't stand being near each other again? What's gonna happen to Chris if that happens? I mean, what do I do with that?" Casey takes a breath. "And Marco... he just... sees me. It's different with him." She admits.

"And I don't know if you can do this for me but just point me in the right direction. Please." Casey pleads at this point and before she can call BS on this whole spiritual thing, something happens.

        "Momma!" Chris calls as he rushes towards his mom with an orange leaf in his hand. "Look! A leaf fell on my head." Casey smiled as she looked at the leaf. "Wow! Hey, why don't you put that on Auntie Leah's gravestone?" He nods as he places it carefully near the stone.

         Chris backs into his mom as she holds him by his waist. "We miss you, Auntie Leah." Chris tells and Casey nods as she breathes out, "Thanks, Leah."

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The two didn't immediately go home after that, Chris had wanted to go the local fair they had around this time that he often liked going to. They played games, went on a few rides, Chris even got his face painted.

           But by the time it got dark, Casey had been informed that the team had just finished up a case and she had decided to drop Chris off with Spencer.

When she had gotten off the elevator, the aroma of coffee and pen ink filled her lungs. She walked into the bullpen with a sleepy Chris in her arms. The first person she had spotted was JJ and Spencer had been standing right in front of her with a shocked expression on her face.

"Look who it is!" JJ announced and Spencer had a confused expression on his face before he found his ex-wife and Chris. "Casey! And Christopher!" JJ smiled.

"Hey, guys. What are you doing here?" Spencer wondered. "Well, we are pretty much wired from our day and Christopher no longer wants me because he wants his daddy." Casey hands the sleepy Chris to Spencer.

Spencer carefully grabs his son and he furrows his brows when he sees what's on his face. "Is that paint on his face?" He questions and JJ walks away before Casey can even answer. "It's washable." She assures.

"Seems like you had an eventful day." Spencer stated. "Eventful... but good." Casey nods as she thinks over the day with Marco and smiles to herself. "I had a... conversation."

By the look on Casey's face, Spencer can tell that it was more than a conversation. No, that was the face that she made often when she happy after talking to someone she liked. He knew because she used to smile like that because of him.

         Spencer's smile drops and he looks over to make sure Chris is really asleep when he looks down and asks: "Who is he?"

          Casey immediately snaps her head towards him and she furrows her brows: "Who's who?"
        "The guy that made you smile like that just now." Spencer told. "You never smile like that and when you did, it was usually because that smile was reserved for me. Which means... there's another guy." He frowns.

         Casey stops in her tracks. How did he figure all of that out just from a smile? She begins to chuckle and she furrows her brows. "There's... no—"

         "Casey." Spencer speaks and Casey stops and Spencer gives her a look. Not one of anger, but one of assurance. "It's okay." She's beyond confused. "It was okay before. It's okay now."

           There's a pause and Casey feels bad about it now. She had gotten Spencer's hopes up for what? So that she could end up going to another guy?

        "Go." Spencer tells, encouraging her to do so positively. Casey furrows her brows and wonders if she should. "Are you sure?"

         Spencer clears her throat and puts his feelings out in the open. "I'm not... ecstatic about it but I'm not gonna force you to choose." He tells. Of course, he wouldn't be ecstatic about it, but he knew that in the end — "I just want you to be happy."

        Casey contemplates. She could stay, right here and now and wonder if her and Spencer will make it. Then, the cons of the situation popped up and all of a sudden, she found herself asking — "You've got him?" She's motioning to Chris as she says this.

        Spencer nods, "Yeah, I do. Go." He tells her and Casey gives him a small smile as she rushes out of the office.

       Spencer watches as Casey rushes off. He thinks about it and Casey did say she was only thinking of getting back together, not that they were. But Spencer can't help but feel a tug at his heartstrings when she had that smile on her face and the fact that she admitted there was someone else. It was hard for him to move on and find someone else. The only person that ever really got him was Casey. And even if it would take years, he was willing to wait for her. No matter how long it took. And he just held onto hope that maybe Casey would eventually open her eyes and see that the person that loved her and got her and understood her was always in front of her.

         Casey found herself back at that park. She took a few breaths of air and all she could see was her breathing through puffs of smoke. She found herself at that bench at the park and looks at her hand, ready to call that phone number Marco wrote on her hand.

Casey dialed the number and held it to her cheek and suddenly, he answered. "Just couldn't stay away, huh?" Casey furrows her brows since she heard him so clear and looked around to see he was standing a few feet away with his phone in his hand.

Marco hangs up and so does Casey and the woman stands up to face him. "Look, I'm still... grieving and breathing and... I still need more time. But I think it'd be cool to spend that time with you."

"Maybe this is worth another try." Casey shrugs.

"Yeah, maybe it is." Marco nods.

With that, the two decide to have a little walk in the park to talk things over. And day by day, Casey felt like she was healing. Healing for herself, healing for other people. And with Marco, the healing seemed worth it.

I KNOW YOU GUYS HATE ME RIGHT NOW IM SORRY BUT BEFORE YOU KILL ME JUST KNOW THAT IF YOU DO YOU WONT GET A PERFECT ENDING😭

i lowkey feel like i'm edging you guys😭😭😭

anyways
like i said
TRUST THE PROCESS I PROMISE YOU ITS WORTH IT THERES JUST SO MUCH ANGST RN AND I JUST DO BETTER AT WRITING ANGST THAN HAPPINESS😭

also
marco's back woohoo😀
y'all remember him from the first book🤭 and he's fineeeee so i had to bring him back

so this next chapter is going to be episode followed by more originals soooo we're doing this episode and then going back to more originals 😁
okay? okay.
i'm actually excited i haven't done an episode in a while

anywayssss
i love you
i'm sorry again
please forgive me
thank you for reading
i promise i'll stop with the angst soon
just please don't hate me forever🫶
-mya </3