There was one thing he'd never get used to...losing someone.

It was a cold. It was the desperation and impending doom. It was hands so stiff from numbness the very blood in a person's seemed to have frozen. It was that futile attempt, while crouching and huddled, to survive by lighting wet wood. It was watching those tiny bursts of hope and warmth being put out over and over and over by the strength of the wind and cold. It was the compounding thoughts of death that began to consume every waking moment. It was being frozen alive every time he realized the person wasn't there.

Michael jogged around town, for the third time that morning and the tenth since yesterday. He didn't care about the gawkers and pointers at the odd boy who just kept running and occasionally would shout one word, a name.

"RENE!"

He had to find her. When she had ran...the look on her face...

He shook his head, to clear the rising anger and worry, but still it lingered. He should have been faster. He should have run after her when he saw her face crumble. It didn't matter know though, he couldn't change it. All that mattered was finding her. His feet slapped the pavement, an offbeat rhythm. Chasing her, he was always chasing her.

The day they had run was clear in his mind, a stark photo capturing something important that he didn't realize the significance until much later.

Michael had been sent in, assigned to the Asylum, due to its mysterious nature. Little was known about the Asylum besides it was privately funded and considered one of the best. The reasons why though were always unclear. A rumor of a rumor they had the top technology, medicine, and doctors for those willing to pay. A place of last hopes, they didn't know how wrong they were.

Places like the Asylum were always a hot bed for the unknown, yet the Asylum had managed to take it to a whole new level. It was obvious now what the good doctor had been doing, he was collecting and he was experimenting. The thought of how many had probably faded away because of it still gave him chills. He couldn't bear to tell Rene and the others, the depth of what had been happening there, the truth of what Lora had found.

Michael leaned forward to catch his breath, eyes scanning ever for that dirty blonde head.

How could her own mom have done that to her? He knew they had...a rough past to say the least, but that? A new life complete with the picturesque house and cookie-cutter family, it was like Rene had never existed. She was strong, but was she strong enough to survive that? It was a sickening thought. He hated this, feeling helpless, and was ready to burn the town down...unfortunately, if he wasn't careful he probably would.

The taste of ash was thick on his tongue. His insides were trying to burn him alive and once more he asked himself the question, was she worth it? To be honest, he had rather...well, disliked Rene when he had first met her to put it kindly and to say it wasn't love at first sight was an understatement.

She had been a bit of a brat and such a plain looking girl, if not for her unnaturally bright green eyes and tattoos. She was off putting with her dry, sarcasm and blunt nature. She had been abrasive and short, not to mention hot tempered. The nickname ice queen had been a lash out at the sheet of cold that met his advance. She had appeared to be nothing special really. Still he had approached her because it didn't take long to pick up the rumors after her big confrontation with Kristy on his first day. The crazy girl that somehow managed to acquire a steady growth of ink and claimed no knowledge of how it happened. It was definitely worth a look into, considering his field of expertise.

It had all been about the show. Flirt and tease with her, so he might get closer and figure out if she was one of them. It was a chore, a job. It had taken him by surprise when he saw what was behind the haunted and tough face. All the scars she bore, physically, mentally, and emotionally. The damaged soul that lay within yet, kept fighting. It was...he didn't even know the word to describe how awing it was. He couldn't quite place when it happened, but one day Rene had turned from annoyance into a human and friend...then something more.

He tried to make it obvious how he felt about her, but for now she didn't seem to reciprocate. Still, he couldn't imagine his life without her and so the goofy friend he remained. AKA "the friend zone" as the cool kids put it, though usually those were the same people complaining about how they were in it. He didn't honestly see the big deal. Sure he felt and wanted more than just friendship with Rene, but it wasn't like it was his right to it. It was more important to him that she was happy.

Michael sat down on the curb, his head in his hands, dejected.

"Hey Pyro." Rene stood over him, sipping at a cup of coffee.

Her hair was a mess, knotted and greasy. There were small cuts on her legs and face, barely visible between the smears of dirt. She looked haggard and tired.

"Can I have some?"

She gave him a look before tilting her head back to take another long drink. She tossed the, now empty, container at him. He caught it with a smile. It was nice to see she still had a spark under all that.

"So, did you talk to her?" Rene's eyes traveled away, the blank face hiding whatever strain was tearing her brain apart.

"Yep, in case you wanted to know. I went back after...after I couldn't find you..." He paused, his chest choking on the words. "I'm sorry..."

She shook her head, her hair shifting to cover her face. "Don't. Just don't."

Michael shifted as she sat down on the curb as well, a good arm's length away. She perched like she was ready to bolt again. He wondered she was even aware of herself doing it, the lengths she took naturally to avoid being touched. She even tilted away from him just slightly, as though she was a tree grown crooked or ready to just tip over.

Her fingers twitched, clenching as she dug them into her palms. Michael sighed, falling back onto the sidewalk. Clouds rolled past, nothing more than memories on the breeze. They swirled and changed with the whims of the present. People state the past can't be changed, he begged to disagree. The past changed in its own way. One second it was a bear riding a unicycle, the next it looked more like a fire-breathing horse. Memories changed, their movie playing on a grainy screen that updated with the person. Sometimes, parts would disappear and feelings on it would change. Memories he was once proud of, now ashamed him to his core.

"She met him a while ago."

Rene stiffened, but didn't stop him.

"After some years, she had been given privileges to leave during the day due to good behavior, got a part time job even and was going to university for a degree in business. After medication and therapy, she was considered to be high functioning and low risk."

A small sharp intake of breath was the only signal she was still there.

"He had swept her off her feet and they began dating. He didn't care about the mental health struggles or at least didn't run from them. Eventually she got pregnant and together they worked to get her out of the institution, still it took time and she had the baby while still institutionalized. The girl is six. Her name is Angel Renae Raider." He paused, tilting towards her hair covered face. He tried to read what was beneath the curtain. "She said the middle name was for the big sister she would never know."

"So she didn't intend to get me back."

"She was told you were beyond help, practically a vegetable between medication and corrective surgery done to keep you from harming yourself and others"

Rene choked, attempting to lace her normal venom and sarcasm through the pain. "That makes it better."

Michael sighed, reaching up to grab at the passing clouds, out of his reach, just like the faces that haunted his memories. "I'll say one thing about the Asylum; they are good at their cover-ups. Many secrets burned with that place."

"Someone should have tried to save us...someone's...family, should have cared enough, even if mine didn't."

"To be fair, it wasn't just shady deals and money being exchanged to keep that place in the darkness where it thrived."

A quizzical look was thrown his way. He ran over the truth in his head as he drowned in those piercing green eyes. Should he tell her? Tell her about all the others that came before her? About the years of pain they suffered searching and preparing for...well her, the ink bearer. She never wanted to hear about the Asylum whenever Declan updates the others. In fact she went to great lengths to avoid it, as though not knowing would free her from the cage it had been. The Asylum may be in ashes, but she still was wandering those halls in her mind.

A shadow draped over his face. Rene stood above him, her arms folded.

"I hope someone steps on you."

"As long as it's not the face."

They remained that way, an impasse, her above him, an unintentional lording. There was a reason people say to get on the same level of the person you are talking to. It was to avoid that feeling or at the very least that difference. It put people on different planes of existence, two different ways of viewing the world. He wondered if they'd ever be able to see eye to eye.

"Would you stop me if I tried to burn everything down?"

For a moment the words just floated, as though emerging from the abyss. They both knew very well it could have come from either of them in that moment.

"Yes, merely because you would regret it later, not because I don't think she deserves some sorta karma." Michael said.

"What...what if I asked you." Her gaze burned into his, the green eyes alight with pain. "Would you burn everything down?"

Michael clenched his fists, steam rising off him, his own sweat evaporation into the air, as he struggled to contain his own anger and hurt. He words burned his mouth.

"Please, please don't ask me."

Rene blinked. Her face was a passive slate, despite the storm of emotion in her eyes. She turned away, a snort coming from behind her curtain of hair.

"It was a joke. Like I'd ever ask you for anything, I'm not some damsel remember. I'm the knight with swords, axes, and dragons, not you."

"Sorry, how could I forget." He smiled up at her. "You're the one who saves me."

A careful, calculating face gazed back at him. He could never read her when she was like that, processing. She had withdrawn into her mind, playing with the new information, trying to make sense of it.

"She gave me this for you." He pulled out a battered journal from where it had been tucked into his pants. "Said it would help explain things."

Holding it out, a picture, faded and worn, slipped out from the pages and onto the ground. Rene leaned over, her slim fingers picking up the image. Her fingers flitted across, tracing whatever she saw there before handing it back to him.

"Do whatever you want with it, that woman isn't my mother. My mother was a monster that dragged me into the darkness and I'm tired of letting her still do it."

Michael took the photo. A small girl grinned back at him. It was obviously Rene as a child, her hair in pigtails and green eyes, innocent and wide. The small girl was covered in dirt with grass stains on her jeans and t-shirt. Neither tattoos nor scars marred her porcelain doll-like appearance. Rene had been genuinely happy as she stood their clutching a book to her chest and a stick in the other. A little knight in the making.

"Are you sure about this Rene?" The use of her name causing her to pause and draw her undivided attention from the depths of her mind. "No one's perfect. Your mother...she did some terrible things, but I think she's really trying to change and be better."

"You're right. No one is perfect. But why should I hold her to any less the standards than she expected of me?"

Rene turned on her heel, striding away to a nearby bus stop on the other side of the road. Michael tucked the small Rene back into the journal for safe keeping. Perhaps he could help save that little girl, even if it was just the preservation of a memory. Tucking the journal back into the waist of his jeans, Michael popped up and ran after her.

Always chasing her.